Another one threw me off again!

[convict24]

Let's start with what's iv changed and what is good. I dress good and have above average looks. I do good in the beginning. I'm a one night stand master. My swag is top notch. I can vibe with most women. I'm not afraid.

Gym 5 days a week I look good
I feel great! I do my own thing always busy
I got my **** together - job, appartment across from the beach,
I stopped being a party animal
Iv chilled out

Bad...
I still get way to ****ing attached. If a girl is into me I'm wayyyy to over the top. My conversations sometimes get to umm let's over thought. Not on purpose it's just the way I am. I'm an intense person.

To try and change that I took the advice of sosuave and Always talk to every girl I meet that attracts me. I consistently get numbers and girls hitting me up. But the second she is into me I and I'm into her... I give it well one week maybe two. It comes natural. I act myself. But they always flake, disappear, ect. It's like one wrong thought I share is a deal breaker.

I'm looking for a relationship. If I'm into a chick I end conversation with other women because I don't feel right if it works out.

So I ask. How do I know if she's full of ****. I'm sick and tired of women acting like they are seriously looking for someone serious and then not being straight up after they lead me on....

Why do I have to feel like a player in this game?

 

[convict24]

Got it! Thank you! I want to work on this. I get banging Hott girls now. For once I my life I feel like the man. It's great . But I still feel like I'm falling back into my beta ways before women were attracted to my body... iv always had good looking face....

And I get it. What they thought they had wasn't me. I'm ok with that. I don't what a woman who thinks the have something I'm not. I don't lie, I cannot from past relationship experiences I had, they will find out lol. I'm so straight forward it's stupid. Yea I make my situation very optimistic. But I'm a ****in optimistic person! Deal with it!


I'm just frustrated with this Bs.. they are in my face about wanting a relationship and so am I. Maybe I come off to strong. Idk if I should change that but I'm really not trying to change the way I am. I know that they don't even have the best situation either. It's obvious to me now...

Im going to go threw the latest one and pick out conversations were I know I made her pu s sy dry

 

[Julian]

Stop talking and start fukking


Whats these deep convos your having dude...sounds like your spaced out..save that sh1t for the forums. You should be only contacting these chicks to chill at the beach then go back to your pad.

I think the issue is you are a forever alone type guy...but the successful end of the spectrum..you built yourself up physically/materially/lifewise etc. you have the physique the looks the apt the job everything..only thing you are missing is...THE GIRL..and it seems like you are a bit desperate for her..

play it cool an mysterious with these chicks my dude. the problem is they meet you and think wow this dude has it all then you open your big mouth an fk it all up.

 

[convict24]

I am ****ing though... that's not the issue here lol. Yes I'm getting desperate again... I dumped the last three worthless chicks who were not suitable to raise my child/children.

The issue is like you said I open my big ****ing mouth and have these pointless conversations when I don't need to explain s h it!

I just need a goddamn push in the right direction. That's why I'm here for exactly what you said!

Oh I forgot to mention I tend to attract women who have issue's .. not on purpose btw. the type that come along with binge drinking once or twice a week like me... and I'm not about to stop getting ****ed up on the weekends. The ones who like to drink like me and don't have issue's I probably act desperate like you said and scare them away...

The big question is how the **** do I not act desperate when she is obviously into me and I'm into her? What I am I suppose to do when she's wanting conversation. And not just bs conversation. constructive conversation! Where it flows....

You probably nailed it. I act desperate. Doesn't matter how the conversation goes. In the end she thinks I'm dieing to be with her and she takes advantage of that... so how am I suppose to wrape my head around this? Deal with my thoughts? Any tricks?

 

[daddymonsterpoodle]

You sound soooo desperate to be in a relationship. You can't force it. Change your mindset. Don't ever be ymthe first to bring up relationship plans. Let them do the work and make you commit.

 

[Bayne05]

You've mastered the getting girls part, now you need to work on calming the fvck down. Relationships happen on their own they are not forced, if you do you'll probably break up within a year or a couple of months. If she doesn't want to date you or flakes then you didn't fit the boyfriend category, similarly to what your doing to the woman that aren't wife material.

 

[RangerMIke]

First, you can not hide SH!T from women. If you start getting more into her than she is into you, she can and will pick up on this. Women are more comfortable when they are the one's that are more into you than you her.... I know.... makes no sense because that is not what they say... but you should never pay any attention to what women say, only what they do.

NEVER be the one looking for a relationship EVER. Trust me... women know, you can not hide this. The only thing you should want for women is fun and sex. The only way I know how to keep from slipping into a place where you are focusing on one women is to date and hook-up with more than one lady.

 

[Fugitive]

LOL for second here I thought that you were my stunt double. Here's some honest advice from someone who has been in your shoes before.

What I've learnt is that patience is the key and options are your weapon.

1. Why is it that a girl drops you the minute you say something they don't like? It's that easy to drop you because a) they aren't attached to you yet and b) because they have options so the minute they clock off with you there's a whole line of other guys for them to play their games with. You need options so ensure you're talking to multiple chicks at once. This means your attention is divided so you wont seem as keen and also you won't care as much if you're dropped as you too will have a line of other chicks.

2. You need to lay off the heavy disclosures i.e. don't tell them your weaknesses or open up about your personal sh*t too much. Once she's invested in you then you can be a bit more open but let her fall for you first by just being fun and playful and mysterious. Women are very manipulative they act like a concerned friends when they interrogate you about past relationships and past life events, if you start going into that and exposing potential weaknesses/baggage they will listen along, give you the sympathetic eyes, re-assure how brave you were and then go back home think about it and use all the stuff you've just told her to disqualify you as her potential mate. The LJBF speech will be delivered to you in the coming hours and days. Your the man, she's the p*ssy. Keep your sh*t together and let her tell you her weaknesses instead.

3. Don't chase. It takes girls time to fall for you, so you have to allowed them that time and space. If you're constantly talking to them then they don't have that space and will eventually push you away to get space. Their attraction for you will decrease if you're too available and too suffocating. A woman needs to be able to walk away and not be chased in order to see you as a man.

4. Drop the future sh*t in your head. You're thinking about kids and who's going to be the mother of your children and that type of thing will filter through in your communication. It comes across as desperate and it will scare women away. If you want to lose a girl one of the quickest ways of doing so is getting heavy about the "future".

The first step to dealing with your issues is to acknowledge you need to improve your skills with women. You've done that by posting this thread. The next step is to identify what you need to change/do to improve. Some good ideas in here I'd also recommend checking out Coach Corey Wayne on YouTube. Finally you're not going to change overnight but you have to start somewhere. Options are a good place to start. After some time you'll look back on yourself and think what a p*ssy.

 

[RangerMIke]

4. Drop the future sh*t in your head. You're thinking about kids and who's going to be the mother of your children and that type of thing will filter through in your communication. It comes across as desperate and it will scare women away. If you want to lose a girl one of the quickest ways of doing so is getting heavy about the "future".

Truth there is no future other than what is going to happen next week... and the only thing you should be thinking about what the two of you are doing the next week is having sex. That's it. That is EXACTLY the mindset you need to have. DO NOT even think about her until just before and after you call, and while you are on a date.

 

[Slime93]

Are you sure you're meeting all their "needs" ?

 

[daddymonsterpoodle]

Are you sure you're meeting all their "needs" ?

Wow, harsh question to answer LOL.
From what he says though it doesn't sound to me like the issue, but although may be part of it.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

You don't need to feel like a player. It's a case of simply accepting what a woman is attracted to and aroused by.

Sounds like you've sorted your lifestyle out, now time to keep working on your game and attitude.

Above all else, you must remain indifferent. The reason they keep disappearing is that you are giving off a vibe that tells them you are way to into them, way too quickly. It feels very unnatural to start with to hold your feelings back, to not contact them before they contact you, and to avoid answering questions and primarily NOT TO CHASE. But when you do learn to control all of these things, the way women act with you is like night and day different. They will call and text, they will be suggesting dates, they will be escalating with you. This is the natural order of things; this is the way it must be. Never, ever chase a woman.

Unless a woman tells you to get lost, assume she'll be back round to see you at some point. DO NOT CHASE.

 

[CMNILS87]

Best advice from my dad for proper date etiquette.

1. Just shut up, don't give anything away. If she wants to know, she'll ask.
2. Just shut up and listen. She'll tell you everything you need to know and you literally don't have to say a word except to keep her engaged.

 

[3agle 3yes]

...I'm looking for a relationship. If I'm into a chick I end conversation with other women because I don't feel right if it works out.

...they are in my face about wanting a relationship and so am I.

You have what I call "relationship bias".

"relationship bias" is what I call when a man thinks about having a relationship with a woman too soon (and in most cases, immediately). If you have this it will come across in almost everything you do, it will turn you from attracting women to trying to make them like you...this leads to them thinking you want something from them...and this leads to, ultimately, rejection.

The solution?

Expect nothing, just concentrate of enjoying yourself...and don't expect it to go any further than this most of the time. Most women aren't relationship material...

 

[CMNILS87]

Would you say that he's already thinking about a future with the girl halfway through the date? Just thoughts start popping up and then the whole tone of conversation changes. Pulls you out of the moment of the date and you're just not focused on the now anymore?

You have what I call "relationship bias".

"relationship bias" is what I call when a man thinks about having a relationship with a woman too soon (and in most cases, immediately). If you have this it will come across in almost everything you do, it will turn you from attracting women to trying to make them like you...this leads to them thinking you want something from them...and this leads to, ultimately, rejection.

The solution?

Expect nothing, just concentrate of enjoying yourself...and don't expect it to go any further than this most of the time. Most women aren't relationship material...