She doesnt really love me right?

[summersky]

Hi everyone,

so I met a girl 3 months ago, she seemed really interested. Always wrote me, wanted to talk to me, made small gifts. The sex was really good. She told me she loves me and other sweet stuff. We got closer and closer and had a deep connection. She told me nobody understands her like i do. We were talking everyday on the phone. I really started to fall for her and showed her. I treated her really good, sometimes got jealous.

Then few weeks ago, she got a little tipsy and we somehow started talking about all kinds of weird stuff. She told me that her first boyfriend was perfect and that she loved him more than she loves me. (She broke up with him one and a half year ago). She also told me that he treated her bad and was a player. He was cheating and lying. But he is still the most handsome man in the world in her eyes.

That really bothers me now. If she really would love me, like she is saying, she should talk about me like that... Instead it seems like she still didnt let go of her ex. Or I am just not enough for her.. Maybe she likes jerks and I am a good guy. Or I am not handsome enough..

What do you think guys? Please, I would be happy about every opinion. Do you think she isnt that into me? And if so then why? Does a woman need more time to develop really big feelings for a man??? Its making me crazy..

Regards

 

[mrgoodstuff]

She told you what she likes. Maybe you should feed it to her by the plate. I don't know, I'm waiting on what the wise so-suavers have to say. I do know it's not going to be wise to ask her about her preference, but what you could say, is how could she like him so much if he treated her so badly. Make her hamster spin a little. You can always get more busy with your personal agenda, because I guarantee your spending more and more quality time with her than the player was.

 

[Malcontent]

This b1tch will never be any good for you. She's either still in love with the ex or just said that to see if you will try harder, whatever that may mean. Either way, it's not cool.

 

[Atom Smasher]

When are we men going to learn to take women to task for what they do and say?

That's immediate grounds for dismissal In my world. It is profoundly disrespectful. Why is it so hard for men to see this?

 

[Dynamited]

If you guys are not exclusive then just go along with it until it fizzles out.
However, if you are in a relationsip with her, drop her and don't look back. You are having some degree of oneitis at the moment but there are many many girls out there who will adore and love you as the main man in their lives. Don't short change yourself.

Never play 2nd fiddle to a girl's ex. The fact that she could foolishly mutter those words leaves much to be desired.
If she can't let sleeping dogs lie then she deserves to be bitten.

 

[Colossus]

Imagine for a moment you two got drunk and you said this to her. "Babe, i like you a lot but i really loved my first gf more. She was the hottest girl ive ever been with and even though you treat me better than she did, i just cant love anyone more than her, she was my one."

Do you think any but the lowest of the low self esteem girls would stick around after that??! No effing way.

Leave this idiot girl and let her experience some consequences.

Oh and btw she'll try to gt you back after you dump her. Girls hate being dumped.

 

[ZTIME]

Hi everyone,

so I met a girl 3 months ago,

She told me nobody understands her like i do.

We were talking everyday on the phone.

I really started to fall for her and showed her.

I treated her really good, sometimes got jealous.

Or I am just not enough for her.. Maybe she likes jerks and I am a good guy. Or I am not handsome enough..

Regards

OP Reread your thread this way ^^^^^^

In 90 days.. 90 fvcking days you've done this to yourself!

You can fill in the blanks about what she did or said, because quite frankly it's irrelevant.

You understand her better than anyone else means you're a push over, a weak guy that can be walked all over.

You talking everyday on the phone means you have no options and are good to listen to the ramblings of some chick. (Mostly about her problems I'm sure).

Treated her good and got jealous meant that you kissed her a** and are afraid to loose your little trophy to another dude.

Now you don't even feel good about yourself because you've allowed yourself to believe this girl is better then you!

Why treat yourself like this?? It's not the girl...its you!

You choose what you're willing to accept, but if you continue to treat yourself like this, all of your relationships will have similar results.

 

[oOh Nasty]

Sorry bruh.

You're losing out to an Alpha that's way out of her life already. As ZTIME said, you did it to yourself.

I suggest you check out the No Contact thread on these forums. As Desdinova would say, you're waaaaay below the first place Alpha on her highscore list.

 

[wifehunter]

Sounds like you're a FB/orbiter/backup/replacement, nothing more...

Spin plates! That will show her! Be scarce/high value, then you won't have to question or worry.

Also, find your frame and keep it! Don't ever settle for a female who is not crazy about you!

 

[Yewki]

Then few weeks ago, she got a little tipsy and we somehow started talking about all kinds of weird stuff. She told me that her first boyfriend was perfect and that she loved him more than she loves me. (She broke up with him one and a half year ago). She also told me that he treated her bad and was a player. He was cheating and lying. But he is still the most handsome man in the world in her eyes.

This is a textbook basic b*tch. Don't marry this woman

 

[Billtx49]

Possibly an Alpha widow there. More proof that alcohol helps the truth come out of their own mouths though if we listen to it.
If that's the case, the only answer is to be more alpha than him, or you will be discarded eventually via hypergamy.
You do not really know him, but let her feel free to talk about her past, without you directly mentioning him. It will come out. If he did things that really excited her, you be more exciting, etc, etc.

 

[sodbuster]

she's either an Alpha widow, of stupid. IF you want to hang around for the ride, treat her like sh1t like HE DID. But, NOT marriage material. IF he ever comes back, she will leave you for him

 

[summersky]

Hi, thanks for all your opinions!

I have to add that I wouldnt say that I acted like a chump. Yeah we were talking almost everyday but it was because of the deep connection we felt. She was calling and texting as much as I did, maybe even a little more often. I talked about boundaries and always spoke up if I didnt like something she did. Freezed her out a few times, she came back and agreed to play by my rules.. I would say I was treating her normal, not like a chump, not like an a**hole but normal.

I dont know if she was attracted, and still is to her ex because he treated her like sh*t. I believe it was more because he was one of these very handsome guys, like she told me. Me, I am just average..

What about the saying that love grows over time? She was with her ex much longer than with me. Is it possible that she just didnt develop strong feelings towards me??? Or is it like if women are really attracted to men, they are always from the beginning??

Would be really happy about some opinions about what I wrote above!

Regards

 

[Bible_Belt]

It's too late now. But my answer for any woman ever telling me that she has interest in another guy is "cool! Invite him over. We'll have a threesome." And I say it like I mean it. No woman has ever taken me up on the offer, and it is a very effective, discrete way to say "shut up, wh0re."

 

[dustmuffin]

It's too late now. But my answer for any woman ever telling me that she has interest in another guy is "cool! Invite him over. We'll have a threesome." And I say it like I mean it. No woman has ever taken me up on the offer, and it is a very effective, discrete way to say "shut up, wh0re."

I have also spanked women for bringing up their exs. This has worked well for me.

 

[summersky]

Hi again,
so after I broke up with her, she was really really down. She tried to explain that feelings grow over time and that her love for me could become bigger, like bigger than for her ex. But she still think its normal to find her ex more handsome and no matter how you love somone, it wont change that.

I told her, that if I would be what she really wanted, that after 3 months the "big" love would already be there. And she would also not talk about her ex like that.

Any thoughts?

 

[Desdinova]

Once a woman experiences that "one guy" and doesn't stay with him, she's damaged goods. Pairbonding becomes nearly unobtainable. He's at the top of her high score list, you're near the bottom. If you're looking for a LTR, look elsewhere.

 

[Prime_Beef]

Summersky,
Let's talk about alpha widows for a bit, so u understand what u r up against. Prime_Beef likes to contribute from time to time, hoping my experiences will help others. I'm almost 50. Been around, done a lot. I have made a few alpha widows in my time, happily married now, 2nd wife, small kid, had plenty of acorns in the tree b4 I met Mrs. Beef. To her I look like a catch, she's still not knowing fully how deviant I could be..onto an example.

Alpha widow example. Met a girl in college, nearly 30 years ago. Body, chemistry great. Banged her every which way..she was always horny. Always. Virgin b4 me..for real felt it break.. Often I'd bang her 7, 8 times a day, and that's cuming each time, her, toes curled, legs shaking for hrs after. Time doesn't permit a full explanation, but I never felt her marriagable.. you know tho she got me excited..she asked, tried to marry, would tolerate me banging other women, sometimes in front of her, I'd nail her in the parking lot b4 going into restaurants, movies, anywhere, any time, tolerated me dumping her several times, could be apart a couple years, I'd give her a call, she'd drop all and be back banging me. This went on for 20+ years. She called twice past few years... waiting, hoping, lets a mutual friend know how shes doing, asks about me. For me, I've let her know its about sex, possibly best ever, but, just sex. I could have it like drinking a fine Hirsch whiskey and walk away until next time. No other man measured up, either sexually or I gather otherwise. She can't move on. She's fixed, programming wired, she's been to therapy. She never had kids, didn't want another man's kids.if I make the call I'd be fu*king her tonight 5 x. (Little older now) She looks good, men hit on her, she's not interested.

Why do that to yourself?

 

[hockeyfreak79]

Yeah chalk this 1 up in the spring fling column, that's all this was and ever will be. You made the smart move by dumping her a**. She sounds like a c*nt BUT she actually kind of did you a favor by sabotaging the relationship. You have to move on, B's like this will continue with the drama & sabotaging crap.

You are bound to meet another one like this again & you will know exactly what to do without having to ask for advice.

 

[Desdinova]

No other man measured up, either sexually or I gather otherwise. She can't move on. She's fixed, programming wired, she's been to therapy. She never had kids, didn't want another man's kids.

^^^THIS is what happens when you're at the top of her high score list. You've made her damaged goods for every other man in existence EXCEPT yourself. She is 100% yours. This SHOULD be the most important factor when you're looking for a companion to keep for the rest of your life. I mean she still needs to have good morals and such, but THIS is what will keep her around. When you're at the top, you command her. If she happens to go back out and date, she will dump any guy to get back with you. You are her #1 priority in life, and there's no way you can replicate that with some bytch who's riding the c0ck carousel and has pooped out a couple of kids.

If you're at the top of her list, then you may successfully settle down with her. If you're not, fvck her and throw her away.

As a side note, I don't have any sympathy for women who throw away the man on the top of her list. These women essentially kill their own potential to pairbond.