Do You Eject From pseudo-friend zone dates immediately?

Wilko

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For shiz!

Spent a great hour with a financial planner in her mid thirties a few months back. Quite doable, but not quite as good as her photos. Really had her sh!t together - a proper, functioning adult - very similar values to boot. Good rapport & good kino throughout, buuuuuut she had this aggressive, masculine energy that didn't work for me. Turns out I do like warmth and vulnerability! Who knew?!

But yeah, good way to spend an hour regardless.
 

marmel75

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I will check it out, and you might be right. On the next date I will try the opposite approach.

But just so we're on the same page, do you believe that no matter what variation of "we're not having sex tonight" you get, the answer is take what you want anyway?
If she says straight out "we aren't having sex tonight", its one of the surest signs you are going to get laid if you play your cards right.

No, you don't "take" what you want. At least not until you are both naked in the bedroom and fvcking her. Then you "take" what you want.

Up until that point you actively attempt to get what you want and make her reject you at least 3 times in your attempt to get it.
 
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BlueAlpha1

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If she says straight out "we aren't having sex tonight", its one of the surest signs you are going to get laid if you play your cards right.

No, you don't "take" what you want. At least not until you are both naked in the bedroom and fvcking her. Then you "take" what you want.

Up until that point you actively attempt to get what you want and make her reject you at least 3 times in your attempt to get it.
Well, she didn't exactly say it in those terms. I know that quote is usually a good thing, but this was different, although you could have perceived it the same way. But her look (hair in a bun) and demeanor early in the date (purse between us) didn't point to that.

I would actually agree I balked with this girl, and it's probably inexcusable. Such thin skinned-ness is usually unlike me, but I was really taken aback by how charming this girl was. I feel that a rejection would have stung a lot more than your average American ho, who I spit on. I've gotta work on that.
 

yuppaz

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I will check it out, and you might be right. On the next date I will try the opposite approach.

But just so we're on the same page, do you believe that no matter what variation of "we're not having sex tonight" you get, the answer is take what you want anyway?
Honestly "We're not having sex tonight" a lot of the time means she is thinking about sex and wants to have sex with you....
 
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BlueAlpha1

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Honestly "We're not having sex tonight" a lot of the time means she is thinking about sex and wants to have sex with you....
But she didn't say that. She was talking about online dating and goes:

"This is not a date, we're just hanging out."

She was smiling and making eye contact when she said it...
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

yuppaz

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If a chick is into me she isn't going to say that, or isn't going to tell me about guys, or anything that she thinks might f*ck it up for her. What's annoying is that they still meet up if they aren't feeling it. Good on you for being non-reactive.
 
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