Sex before dinners?

[Jack Hensy]

I met a hottie and so far good.

1st date I just had water. She had tea and appetizer. She paid for it because I just had water and told her it was just a meet and greet.

2nd date. I had one beer and she had ice tea. She asked me to pay for her tea. I told her I would pay for it as long as she pays for my beer in a joking matter. Turned out the tea was free at the bar and I just paid for my beer.

3rd date she wants to go out to dinner and drinks at expensive restaurant this Friday night. We have had heavy make out sessions but no sex. I did say to her.."Lets get the "f" out of her and go back to your place." We didn't. Instead we got sexy in her car. I didn't push it with her. But she is hinting that I am going to her place since she asked me if I liked dogs because she owns two of them and wants me to see them.

Should I skip dinner and say hey lets just get drinks and bar food? OR no food.
I don't want to be rude. I am just tired of paying forr dinner and drinks and the girl ditching me or giving me no sex afterwards. Its sux because women can be manipulative.

 

[marmel75]

Offer to pick her up from her house so you can see her dogs...good chance you can leverage that into banging without going anywhere and simply "order in" between rounds

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

She wanted it doggy style bruh.

 

[MrWood]

lets just cook a meal together if we get hungry, got any bad movies...

 

[Atom Smasher]

A little tangential, but you guys in your thirties are way to old to be playing this strict "she pays" game and this idea of spitting bills 50/50.

It's just a fact of life and a part of the dance that men pay, with women making token payments here and there. In so doing, men establish dominance, superiority and generosity, all attractive traits.

Having said that, I never buy a woman a meal unless she has earned it and looks like a good prospect. No matter how you slice it, a man negotiating with a woman to pay half looks incredibly weak. If she wants to go to an expensive restaurant, that's a GIGANTIC yellow flag.

 

[MrWood]

why did you agree to her choice of restaurants anyway?

 

[bigneil]

Really tired of these cheap men posts. In case you missed it, since the dawn of mankind, women have offered fertile eggs in exchange for resources.

Seriously, if you can't afford a f*cking iced tea please spare us from having to read about your destitution. Go mow a lawn for $5 or something.

Real men don't wh*re their women out in order to avoid working. That's called being a pimp.

 

[marmel75]

If a woman is really into you she will end up buying the second round without you opening your mouth.

The fact you are having to ask her to do so shows you have no belief that she will find you worth spending money on and by extension no confidence in yourself. Or at least not enough to really matter.

 

[devilkingx2]

A little tangential, but you guys in your thirties are way to old to be playing this strict "she pays" game and this idea of spitting bills 50/50.

It's just a fact of life and a part of the dance that men pay, with women making token payments here and there. In so doing, men establish dominance, superiority and generosity, all attractive traits.

Having said that, I never buy a woman a meal unless she has earned it and looks like a good prospect. No matter how you slice it, a man negotiating with a woman to pay half looks incredibly weak. If she wants to go to an expensive restaurant, that's a GIGANTIC yellow flag.

saving money is saving money bro.

if she wants to go to an expensive restaurant that's only a problem if she "forgets" her wallet then orders lobster and champagne

 

[devilkingx2]

Really tired of these cheap men posts. In case you missed it, since the dawn of mankind, women have offered fertile eggs in exchange for resources.

Seriously, if you can't afford a f*cking iced tea please spare us from having to read about your destitution. Go mow a lawn for $5 or something.

Real men don't wh*re their women out in order to avoid working. That's called being a pimp.

it's not about having enough money to pay for it, it's about not being under any obligation to offer free meals

if she's giving you her time, then you're also giving her your time and you two are even, if her time is worth your money and your time isn't worth any of hers that implies her time is worth significantly more than yours

 

[Atom Smasher]

saving money is saving money bro.

if she wants to go to an expensive restaurant that's only a problem if she "forgets" her wallet then orders lobster and champagne

Look at my post. It says "You guys in your 30s". You, at 18, are in an entirely different world and in your world, you're absolutely right... saving money is saving money.

But when a man becomes his own man and starts to become established, the world becomes very different and worrying about her paying for or splitting initial date costs should never even enter his brain. At that point the man's repayment is not cash but rather her submission to him. The game all boils down to one thing... her submission to a man.

Man = Resources and emotions to a woman.
Woman = Sex, companionship, nurture and maintenance of the "nest" if in a committed relationship.

That will never change because nature's wiring compels it to be so. Nature ALWAYS wins no matter what hair-brained ideas mankind cooks up.

 

[marmel75]

saving money is saving money bro.

if she wants to go to an expensive restaurant that's only a problem if she "forgets" her wallet then orders lobster and champagne

If you are going to an expensive restaurant on the first date or ANY date until you've had sex AT LEAST several times, you are doing it all wrong bro.

 

[bigneil]

if she's giving you her time, then you're also giving her your time and you two are even

Bvll****. A man's time is worth his hourly rate. If he's unemployed, his time is worth zero. By making the woman pay for his drink, he forces her to go out into a man's world and earn money - by working for men - to give to him! 51% of women who cheat do so with men they met at work, and it serves her cheapskate cuckold right.

The man is expected to pay for the date. If you want a system where she offers sex first and then you pay, get a call girl.

 

[bigneil]

If you are going to an expensive restaurant on the first date or ANY date until you've had sex AT LEAST several times, you are doing it all wrong bro.

Oh yeah, and I won't dine out at a nice place alone until I've masturbated at least several times.

A man might take a woman to an expensive restaurant if the cost is negligible to his income and he actually likes eating at expensive restaurants.

Again, convert it to how much time you have to work to take her out. If you have to work 20 hours to take her to Applebees, you can't afford to date her. But call it what it is, it's his being a man of low means, not her being a gold digger.

 

[marmel75]

Oh yeah, and I won't dine out at a nice place alone until I've masturbated at least several times.

A man might take a woman to an expensive restaurant if the cost is negligible to his income and he actually likes eating at expensive restaurants.

Again, convert it to how much time you have to work to take her out. If you have to work 20 hours to take her to Applebees, you can't afford to date her. But call it what it is, it's his being a man of low means, not her being a gold digger.

I'm just saying in general, but to me, personally, the LAST thing I want to be on a first date is stuck across a table from someone being interviewed for an hour and a half...drink, darts, seduction while playing darts, make out, escalate aggressively, fvcking was typically the pattern my dates followed...

I found a few cool places that had a good atmosphere and vibe and I would not deviate from them. Either we met at one of those places or we didn't meet...a few times we did park/trail walks which were always cool because they offered ample time to escalate in proximity, but I had it down to a cookie cutter method pretty much.

Imho, the vibe/atmosphere of a place is a key to how the date goes and can either work for you or work against you. Not enough people understand and utilize this to their advantage. My advice is get to know a few cool spots well, and take all your women their. Added advantage is the hot bartenders will start taking an interest as they see you making out with so many women...I actually fvcked one because she was curious as to what I did so well that all these women I brought were making out with me within 30 minutes...

 

[Huffman]

Having said that, I never buy a woman a meal unless she has earned it and looks like a good prospect.

Do you mean you just don't go to a restaurant early on? Otherwise how would she earn it first.

Not that it matters much for me, in my city girls at ~25 can barely afford their rent if at all, so they're not used to posh stuff. Open-minded and down for whatever, that's how I like it. Older and financially successful? Hm. Let's see.

By the way, if you do go for dinner and she's earned it, do you announce beforehand? Like, "let's go to XY, my treat"? Otherwise it might just build up awkwarness towards the end. I pay the dinner, of course, if she spent money to come and see me (train ticket, gas, whatever).

 

[bigneil]

I move around from city to city, and I'm 45. So naturally I try to make the best of the few dates I get. I try to make each one memorable. My last date, on our third date, said "I brag about the places we go together!"

Sometimes they make an effort to keep the date affordable (and should), but usually they will remind you later of how accommodating they have been, and expect to you splurge.

My last score took me to a friend's party on our first date, and then wanted to go bowling. ($40 total). On our second date we went to her favorite restaurant ($60). So I took her for a night cap and when the moment was right said "Want to check into that hotel next door?" and she said "Yes." It cost $300 and I had to pay it because I wasn't going to say "let's go to a cheaper place". It was worth it.

I usually take them to the trendier restaurants on Yelp. Never a chain. You can choose $$ instead of $$$ or $$$$, but not $.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Do you mean you just don't go to a restaurant early on? Otherwise how would she earn it first.

Not that it matters much for me, in my city girls at ~25 can barely afford their rent if at all, so they're not used to posh stuff. Open-minded and down for whatever, that's how I like it. Older and financially successful? Hm. Let's see.

By the way, if you do go for dinner and she's earned it, do you announce beforehand? Like, "let's go to XY, my treat"? Otherwise it might just build up awkwarness towards the end. I pay the dinner, of course, if she spent money to come and see me (train ticket, gas, whatever).

I usually do action dates first. The cost is negligible. Beach, mini-golf, museum, antique browsing, BBQ at my place, bike ride, etc. Often I'll spring for lunch, but that's an entirely different animal than an official dinner date.

Once we have gotten to know each other and I see her as a good prospect, I will consider taking her out for dinner. Sitting at a restaurant dining with a virtual stranger is not my idea of fun, and it is the same old thing she always does with every guy. I can't generate excitement and emotion in her when we're sitting across from each other throwing beef down our gullets and keeping that expected politeness going on. A formal dinner imposes certain social constraints, i.e. formality.

You used the word, "announce". I wouldn't think of things in those terms. Just say, hey, let's go to XYZ restaurant. Or "Hey, you hungry?".

"My treat"... entirely unnecessary. Saying that is a bit weak and shows her you are thinking in terms of money and value. Just be a man who takes a woman out once in a while when and if he wants to.

 

[Huffman]

It does sound lame now that you mention it. I really haven't been on a lot of dinner dates!

 

[Bible_Belt]

But call it what it is, it's his being a man of low means

If the other option is being a wage slave who has to buy pvssy, I'll take my low means over that life.