Pursue or let it her go?

Jack Hensy

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I had a good 4 dates with a woman I met online. Not sure if to pursue or let her go.

1st date - high interest. No smartphone out. Lots of touching, flirting, kissing. She did show up late.
2nd date - she started to test me. (Told me she was having sex with a guy who looked like me, thought the bartender was cute, etc,) She also told me she wanted to be friends. I agreed with her. Lots of kissing, touching. She showed up 15 min late. She disappeared into bathroom for 20 minutes.
3rd date - She cancelled due to sinus infection. She also takes care of her ailing mother who is needs assistance.
3rd date reschedule - We went dancing, lots of touching, kissing, flirting and went back to my place for sex. She showed up 10 min late. She blew up my phone afterwards telling me how much she liked me and couldn't wait to see me again. She texted me nonstop for a week after we had sex. I was cool with her.

4th date - She arrived earlier than me at bar. (finally) I showed up a few min late.
When I walked into the bar she immediately grabbed my hand and we kissed. We sat at a table to watch the band. She told me the guitarist was cute and charming. She wouldn't stop holding my hands, rubbing my back, she bought us pizza, I bought us drinks, We didn't dance much and we didn't kiss. We flirted a little. Interest was slipping. Every time I pulled my hand away though she would grab it again and pull it back in. At 1:30am I walked her our to her car and asked her to come back to my place again. She said OK. Then she followed me home--then when she pulled up to my driveway she rolled down her window I cant stay and have to leave my mother woke up disoriented and I have to see her now! My sister is on her way too. If she gets there before me I will come back.
She sent me 5 texts later saying she couldn't back over and her mom was doing better. Hope I wasn't upset.

It was cruel for her to leave at 1:30am when we are supposed to be having sex. I kept my cool though with her and smiled and said ok, see ya.


Then she texts me more throughout the week.
I made plans with her again for Tuesday night and she said.."I have a long day tomorrow and if I am not tired I will call you by 4pm and let you know. But lets plan on me being there at your place!
I said, if you cant make definite plans then I wont make plans with you. She said "K"
Then the next day said didn't mean to be rude and I just like making definite plans based out of respect for each others time. She said ok great, and said the weather is getting great we need to get together. Then two days passes she texts me "have a great day at work." I replied thank you.

Then she disappears for 10 days, no more texts. My cell phone stops working too. I got a new phone.
I called her on Saturday and she answers(which was good) I said hi how have you been? She said good how are you?! I said my phone died a week ago and my text messaging stop working. Got a new phone. She said I haven't texted you, but I am the gym, standing here naked and just got out of tanning bed can you call me in a little while? I said..."I tell you what reach out to me if you want to get together in the next week or so" She said ok, then asks how I have been? She asked if I was off work tonight? I said yea. Then she asks if I am going to gym today? I said yes. She said call me afterward your workout. I said "gotcha" She said talk to you later. I said see ya.

END RESULT: I didn't call her back and instead went on another date last night. I had a feeling she was going to manipulate the situation by teasing me with the naked comment, getting me to pursue her and then her blowing me off. Women like to torture guys. But I stayed strong and didn't call her and made definite plans with someone else.
Anyway, Im thinking of waiting 5 more days and calling her one last time to set something up. Or should I let her go?

Thanks.
 

MrWood

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she has you by the balls as a borderline FWB, one slip and you are LJBF4LYFE
next that ****
 

yungballa

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She does have you by the balls man. It seems like she's playing with your head here.

Girls who send you mixed signals don't like you. I'll say that again.

Girls that send you mixed signals DO NOT LIKE YOU.

If a girl truly liked you, she wouldn't risk her chances with you by giving you mixed signals.

Also, if she really does have problems with her mom's health and she has to take care of her, you shouldn't think that she's a flake. Sometimes, girls really do have other important sh1t to attend to.

I don't think you have to ask for our help here, man. If you wanna call her, then call her. If you wanna drop her, then do it. It's really your call.

In my opinion, I'd drop her because I have no patience for girls like this. She either has to have medium-high interest for me to keep her around. I don't do mixed signals either.

But if you still wanna call her up one more time, there's nothing wrong to see what's up with her if you give it one little last try. But if she's not down even after that, I'd strictly advise that you drop her ASAP and NEXT.

Just my advice.
 

EyeBRollin

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You did well until this:

Then she texts me more throughout the week.
I made plans with her again for Tuesday night and she said.."I have a long day tomorrow and if I am not tired I will call you by 4pm and let you know. But lets plan on me being there at your place!
I said, if you cant make definite plans then I wont make plans with you. She said "K"
On her first text, you make the defnite date. Good job doing the take away, but:

Then the next day said didn't mean to be rude and I just like making definite plans based out of respect for each others time. She said ok great, and said the weather is getting great we need to get together. Then two days passes she texts me "have a great day at work." I replied thank you.
You gave up frame here. There was no need to apologize or explain yourself further. You made a strong play before, then went back on it. This is where she started losing respect for you. All you had to do at this point was wait for her to reach out to you and make a defnite date. Keep doing take-aways until she makes definite plans to see you again.

Then she disappears for 10 days, no more texts. My cell phone stops working too. I got a new phone.
I called her on Saturday and she answers(which was good) I said hi how have you been? She said good how are you?! I said my phone died a week ago and my text messaging stop working. Got a new phone.
Why would you tell her this? You just killed any mystery that could have been there.

She said I haven't texted you, but I am the gym, standing here naked and just got out of tanning bed can you call me in a little while? I said..."I tell you what reach out to me if you want to get together in the next week or so" She said ok, then asks how I have been? She asked if I was off work tonight? I said yea. Then she asks if I am going to gym today? I said yes. She said call me afterward your workout. I said "gotcha" She said talk to you later. I said see ya.
At this pint she's already trying to put you in friend zone.

END RESULT: I didn't call her back and instead went on another date last night. I had a feeling she was going to manipulate the situation by teasing me with the naked comment, getting me to pursue her and then her blowing me off. Women like to torture guys. But I stayed strong and didn't call her and made definite plans with someone else.
Anyway, Im thinking of waiting 5 more days and calling her one last time to set something up. Or should I let her go?

Thanks.
Do nothing.

Wait for her to call you. When she does, make a definite date at your place. Anything other than her agreeing to come over is unacceptable. Retract the offer. If she reaches out again after that, do the same thing. Repeat until she comes over and ****s you. This chick is dead to you, homie. Make her earn you back.
 

hockeyfreak79

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ONETIS---you need more prospects!

You are just on her backburner as she rides the
online c*ck carousel. She admits she's already banging some other dude, sounds like she's looking to upgrade on her f-buddy.

Ghost this online sloot, she's not interested.
 

Jack Hensy

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Next time I date a sexy chick like that....I am going to be super playful, super confident, super high energy and super teasing. I think I became very quiet with her on 4th date as if we were watching the band like you would a movie. It was boring.
The 3rd date was fun as hell. Lots of dancing, teasing, laughing. Which makes sense why I nailed her that night.

ALL online women flake eventually because there are so many dudes throwing d*cks at them.

At least I banged her. Next.....
 

Jack Hensy

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I would love to "tell her off." Why is that a natural instinct for men to do that to women who pull that BS?
You build up a connection with a woman for 4-5 dates and things are going well, trust is being built, sex is good, you are both honest with each other -- then in a blink of an eye she runs off with another man?
That kind of behavior is a sickness.
I have other girls, spin plates, have abundance, meet and get laid more now--but then you meet a girl who lights you up and you think met a girl who you want to date. Yet she turns out to be a liar and a player.
I would love to slap her and pull her hair. If I had only been more man enough to see through her BS.
 

Bible_Belt

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You were a plate for her. She spun you for a while. But women are not naturals at plate-spinning. They are programmed to seek monogamy, even when they don't realize it. Whoever she was fvcking before you and while she was seeing you probably got to her heart, and she couldn't be duplicitous any longer.

No guy enjoys losing, especially losing a girl to another guy. It's our competitive nature. But you had fun while it lasted. Just let it go.
 

KingBeef

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I had a good 4 dates with a woman I met online. Not sure if to pursue or let her go.

1st date - high interest. No smartphone out. Lots of touching, flirting, kissing. She did show up late.
2nd date - she started to test me. (Told me she was having sex with a guy who looked like me, thought the bartender was cute, etc,) She also told me she wanted to be friends. I agreed with her. Lots of kissing, touching. She showed up 15 min late. She disappeared into bathroom for 20 minutes.
3rd date - She cancelled due to sinus infection. She also takes care of her ailing mother who is needs assistance.
3rd date reschedule - We went dancing, lots of touching, kissing, flirting and went back to my place for sex. She showed up 10 min late. She blew up my phone afterwards telling me how much she liked me and couldn't wait to see me again. She texted me nonstop for a week after we had sex. I was cool with her.

4th date - She arrived earlier than me at bar. (finally) I showed up a few min late.
When I walked into the bar she immediately grabbed my hand and we kissed. We sat at a table to watch the band. She told me the guitarist was cute and charming. She wouldn't stop holding my hands, rubbing my back, she bought us pizza, I bought us drinks, We didn't dance much and we didn't kiss. We flirted a little. Interest was slipping. Every time I pulled my hand away though she would grab it again and pull it back in. At 1:30am I walked her our to her car and asked her to come back to my place again. She said OK. Then she followed me home--then when she pulled up to my driveway she rolled down her window I cant stay and have to leave my mother woke up disoriented and I have to see her now! My sister is on her way too. If she gets there before me I will come back.
She sent me 5 texts later saying she couldn't back over and her mom was doing better. Hope I wasn't upset.

It was cruel for her to leave at 1:30am when we are supposed to be having sex. I kept my cool though with her and smiled and said ok, see ya.


Then she texts me more throughout the week.
I made plans with her again for Tuesday night and she said.."I have a long day tomorrow and if I am not tired I will call you by 4pm and let you know. But lets plan on me being there at your place!
I said, if you cant make definite plans then I wont make plans with you. She said "K"
Then the next day said didn't mean to be rude and I just like making definite plans based out of respect for each others time. She said ok great, and said the weather is getting great we need to get together. Then two days passes she texts me "have a great day at work." I replied thank you.

Then she disappears for 10 days, no more texts. My cell phone stops working too. I got a new phone.
I called her on Saturday and she answers(which was good) I said hi how have you been? She said good how are you?! I said my phone died a week ago and my text messaging stop working. Got a new phone. She said I haven't texted you, but I am the gym, standing here naked and just got out of tanning bed can you call me in a little while? I said..."I tell you what reach out to me if you want to get together in the next week or so" She said ok, then asks how I have been? She asked if I was off work tonight? I said yea. Then she asks if I am going to gym today? I said yes. She said call me afterward your workout. I said "gotcha" She said talk to you later. I said see ya.

END RESULT: I didn't call her back and instead went on another date last night. I had a feeling she was going to manipulate the situation by teasing me with the naked comment, getting me to pursue her and then her blowing me off. Women like to torture guys. But I stayed strong and didn't call her and made definite plans with someone else.
Anyway, Im thinking of waiting 5 more days and calling her one last time to set something up. Or should I let her go?

Thanks.
Just curious...you are spinning other plates aren't you?
 

Jack Hensy

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Yes, I am spinning plates. It's the only way to thrive in the dating world. A total numbers game. I have self esteem and never seek validation. Approach, approach, approach. Always be closing.

However, this other woman was different. She grabbed my heart for some reason. I liked her style and confidence. However, she did a 360 degree turn on me in less than an hour after one month of connecting and investing each other. Baffles me.

Sometimes one woman reaches your heart. Can't explain it.
 
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MrWood

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she grabbed your heart, yet you want to commit an act of physical violence against her...
umm
 
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