I am going to approach her. Five year love / oneitis. I. NEED. HELP.

[xupc]

Strong social dysfunction op. 10/10

Seriously.. next her and move on.

 

[Flakey_Woman_Suck]

So when are you gonna ask her out? :')

 

[Eph]

I think you should really take just about everyone's advice here. A lot of it is negative, but it really is helpful advice. I've been in your shoes before. I've been there multiple times actually, but each time I fall for some Angel sent from Heaven, reality opens my eyes to the cold, hard truth that the darkness kept hidden from me. I wouldn't say you're "obsessing" over this girl, but you are losing your grip on reality.

You're calling her wifey when you've barely said two words to her? Like I said, I've been in your shoes before. I've thought about my future with various "angels". I've thought each one would make a great wife, and maybe a couple of them would have. But they weren't as perfect as I was making them out to be. There was a very religious Christian girl I had fallen for. I thought she was too much of an Angel for short shorts...until she posted a picture of herself in them. I also thought she didn't curse. Turned out she just rarely did it.

There was another girl, that I wouldn't say I fell for (I just wanted to bang her), but I couldn't make myself talk to her. I thought she was just too attractive, and it made me nervous. I had so many opportunities to do it, but I p*ssied out each time. I was walking home from McDonald's one day, and we walked past each other. Didn't talk to her. I was walking home from school one day, and walked past her. Didn't talk to her. After the year was over, I thought, "well that's it. I blew it. I won't get another chance". But I saw her again at the next school I went to. Didn't talk to her the first couple of times I saw her. Until one day, I said, "I'm gonna do it today." I finally talked to her. It was the awkwardest conversation I'd ever had.

Control your emotions. If you don't, they control you. Nervousness prevents you from thinking straight, which is why its been so hard for you to approach her. Meditate.

You're remembering little things about her, not because of your amazing memory (hell, I have a photographic memory and can still forget things easily), but because deep down, you want to remember them.

Which is fine. Remembering little things about someone you want doesn't mean you're obsessing. Just accept the reason why you're remembering them. Like the others have said, I can't see this working out. You're too far gone in your own fantasy. Open your eyes. She's not as perfect as you think she is. You may think you know her, but the truth is you don't. How could you? You don't even talk to her. You're basing your opinion of her on what others have told you about her, or what little info you've found about her.

I'd like to say the more you get to know her, the more you'll come to realize she isn't the perfect little angel. But the truth is, I went through oneitis twice before I finally started seeing and accepting flaws.

There isn't much I can say that hasn't already been said. So, I've leave you with this. Keep talking to her, keep getting to know her, and ask her out. If she rejects you (once), accept it and move on. No more contact. And quit ignoring these other plates you have. Talk to them. Get laid. I can't stress enough how someday you'll look back and hate yourself for not realizing how this girl isn't as perfect as you once thought, and how much time you wasted on her.

 

[Costin]

OP:

This is was a saga, I found this whole thread hilarious so thanks for making my day. I don't mean this in a bad way and I hope it works for you.

My advice, KIS as in KEEP IT SIMPLE. You seem to be very much an analytical guy, I can relate to that since I am also one but you should know that trying to analyze everything when it comes a potential relationship is a waste of time.

So just go to her, ask her out on a date and take it from there, you should be able to get a bang quickly if you don't let your anxiety get to you. After that...well that's up to you.

Detractors: The OP might write a lot, but that's because his own hamster is spinning very quickly now and based on his background I'd imagine he is quite capable of writing very quickly pages worth of text.

A lot of us have been in situations like this, over thinking it and analyzing it in far too greater detail.

 

[Blackmesa]

Started reading this thread... Grabbed popcorn and relaxed on my chair.

Can't recall the last time I laughed so much.

What everyone think OP should do in a nutshell:

1 - Approach her
2- "Hey... Bla bla bla... Let's go out?"
3 - ??????????
4 - PROFIT!

Well, can't wait for you to do it OP, I am curious! Good luck!

Regards,

Blackmesa

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Nah, I only respond in detail to detailed posts is because, in respect, for a lack of a better. If someone can take the time to write a decently long post for me, I can take the time to respond in a similar manner (unless the post is all hate). Likewise in person, I can debate with people as long as their are good points being made from either party, but if I sense that the conversation is going nowhere, I end it on the spot. Nothing is planned. Don't know how I can stress this enough.

I will keep you posted.

Oh and did I mention I love writing?

Whatever you do, do not EVER write like this to your 'wifey'. Ever. It's like the total opposite of game. Like anti-game. Like the literary equivalent of a horrible mutilation. Stick to writing stories and not love letters.

Seriously dude, have you still not spoken to her? This is my last reply to this post. Am getting a bit bored now (probably moreso than your wifey, f*ck knows this thread is now somehow a lot drier than her snatch). Am starting to err on the side of the troll-botherers.

Get the **** on with it dude. Or just NEXT.

 

[Flakey_Woman_Suck]

I think you are moving wayyy too fast here. Only 5 years to build attraction?

I'd give it a little longer. Wait until you both are in your mid-40's, then make your move.

Mid-40's dude.. are you stupid?
Mid-80's rather. Sweet granny love.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

I think you are moving wayyy too fast here. Only 5 years to build attraction?

I'd give it a little longer. Wait until you both are in your mid-40's, then make your move.

Haaa...

Sh!t man, if he doesn't f*ck her soon, I will. I bet she'll be f*ckn awesome too, given the frustration this guy has put them both through.... hashtag; the most grateful lay of my life, so far.

 

[pyros]

LoveAfter2009 said:
If I am not wrong, she basically waited for me all these years.

HAHAHAHAHAHA...LMAO.....funniest thing I've ever read.

 

[Kailex]

If I am not wrong, she basically waited for me all these years. Sad statuses, sad songs, cutting off guys, being depressed, giving me unbroken eye contact, staring at me, going out of her way to get my attention, her friends negging her for "liking someone but not talking to them" (it was a joke her sister and girl bff pulled on her a lot last year through photos, fb etc).

Now, if I correct in all this, awesome. I just have to take things slowly and I'll have her in my arms before this forum sees summer time.

Oh no. Oh no no no no no. Oh no. Oh god, no.
You think she's been waiting around for you for years?

You already call her "wifey"?

Take things slowly? How could you possibly take things any SLOWER.

Please tell me you already got her number at least, by this point. Because I get the feeling a bubble might be bursting pretty soon.

 

[Tictac]

If I am not wrong

And here is where the theory falls to the ground.

I think that OP and his doppelgänger went the way of the butt hurt.

 

[garfield]

So... did you ask her out?

 

[Blackmesa]

No more posts from OP. So he was a troll after all?

 

[Piers Nivens]

Yeah what happened OP

did he get her and like, doesnt even give a damn about us anymore? Or what

 

[amazingswayze]

Now here are some interesting things I found out through mutual friends:
-Around 2010/2011, she was in a relationship (or something) with a guy. It was a bad relationship. She was apparently always crying. This is around the same time she rejected my facebook request. Apparently, she ended the relationship around late 2010, early 2011. THE SAME time she started all the facebook things like commenting after me, adding my friends etc.
-Since 2012, she has been posting SAD LOVE songs on facebook. One particular song is titled "My Heart Belongs to You" and it's main lyrics are
"All I hear is raindrops; I can't make this tears stop, you left my world so cold.
You were my best friend as far as I could see.
But then something changed when you fell for me.
Now I am the one who is pain, since I turned you away.
But now you moved on. I know I made you wait too long. I had my chance but now it's gone.
But I am willing to, make a go at me and you; cause I can't live my life without you".
Another one says things like "Give me one more chance. I never understood you."
Another one says things like "Why do you keep coming in and out of my life? Why do you always walk away? What are you afraid of? Aren't you looking for the same thing I am looking for? Don't you get the butterflies in your stomach too when you see me? So why do you walk in and out of my life? Let's take our time baby".


From mutual friends, I have learned she has NOT dated since 2011. She is usually depressed over "someone". She keeps cutting her social circle, and has been making it smaller and smaller to the point where she hangs out with her sisters and 3 girls only now. She has removed most of the guys from her facebook; deleted compliments from guys from photos, and now she deactivated her facebook.

I also noticed something. Everytime I would change my profile picture, she would change it too. If I would change it back to an older picture, she would change hers back to an older picture as well. So she's looking at my profile actively? (Well now her's has been deactivated for several months; afterall, fb does create stupid feelings).

I am planning to talk to her today. In 10ish hours, I am most likely going to be standing with her face to face, and talking to her.

MY QUESTIONS:

What THE **** happened over the years? Did she start liking me for some reason? Is it because I ignored her? I literally went cold after that day she rejected my fb request. Or was it because she broke up with that chump; she came for me whereas before she felt she couldn't?
HOW DO I START A CONVERSATION? Since we have seen each other so many times, especially at college now as well, HOW DO I OPEN with her? TOMORROW. In 12 hours.

Help me out friends. I need it. A teacher is on his knees asking for help. I am called an Alpha by many, yet Wifey makes me freeze. Advise me. Be real. Be strict. I need this.

50% chance she's been a worthless sl*t.

 

[dustmuffin]

Crap I couldn't read all of the bs. With all of irealavant information I thought this was written by a woman or a guy with a mangina. Just ask the ***** for a date. How hard can that be? Hay bb can I haz yo didgets? We can hang sumtime......yes or no..
You have your answer....

 

[Tictac]

Another archeology project?

Who keeps digging up dead threads from troll OPs?

This was a classic thread though.

 

[NSX-R]

Another archeology project?

Who keeps digging up dead threads from troll OPs?

This was a classic thread though.

I loved the part where he said " I'll accept anything no matter how much you hit me" and many posters like you or mrwright told the truth and he was feeling offended because " we do not know him " or " that we are made out of negativity".
I'm sure he's going to get the chick eventually but his puppy dog like behavior won't let this relationship to hold.

 

[Tictac]

I'm sure he's going to get the chick eventually but his puppy dog like behavior won't let this relationship to hold.

I wonder if "wifey" ever came out of the public restroom she was hiding in?

 

[dillj]

there are MANY 10's, dude, but in the US, they cose 1/4 mill $ per year. I'd say you should run far, far away. I also don't believe you on the 26" waist.