When you breakup with a girl should you give closure?

Fela Kuti

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Should you give full disclosure of why you want to end it, or you just go like "I just think this won't work out."? Assuming you haven't been with her for long, maybe 3-4 months.
 

HeadLightsOn

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I've had exes seek closure years after we have parted. It's taken me by surprise and has shown that she never really forgets. As to whether you should give or offer closure, my mind is still not made ups frankly it would depend on her manner, behaviour and the way she treated myself and others.
 

Atom Smasher

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I'm against closure in almost every circumstance. For a woman, closure is a free pass and causes her to avoid questioning her own behavior in the relationship.

I say never give her a "get out of jail free" card. If you do, her thought process will be, "What's wrong with him?". If you leave it open-ended, her thought process will be, "What's wrong with me?". I believe that any time we can force a woman to actually contemplate her own behavior, it's a good thing.
 

Fela Kuti

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I'm against closure in almost every circumstance. For a woman, closure is a free pass and causes her to avoid questioning her own behavior in the relationship.

I say never give her a "get out of jail free" card. If you do, her thought process will be, "What's wrong with him?". If you leave it open-ended, her thought process will be, "What's wrong with me?". I believe that any time we can force a woman to actually contemplate her own behavior, it's a good thing.
yeah, that would be nice in some cases. in my case there's no particular behavior of her that made me want to end it, it's just that we don't connect spiritually and I don't know how to explain it without exuding a sense of superiority and sounding judgmental.
 

Atom Smasher

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In your particular case then I would just say she's a great gal but you're just not feeling that "spark" that should be there for a relationship. Give her the old "It isn't fair to you" routine.
 

RangerMIke

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Why wouldn't you break up like a man? It's so much easier to just get it all out, be honest, and move on. Trust me, women recover from this a lot faster than men, She'll collect up your letter pictures and burn them. She'll go out and buy some condoms hit the clubs and get on the carousel, and you are forgotten in a week.

The key is to be painfully honest... women always know when you are telling the truth. If you don;t want to talk about it, just say "You do know why we are ending this don't you? Do I really need to come out and say it?" many times this will be enough for her to back off and vent at you for a bit. Just sit there and take it like a man, but don't back down. You are there to break things off... nothing should steer you from that purpose. The last thing you want to do is to leave that meet-up with her still thinking there might be a chance. That REALLY is not fair to her... AGAIN TRUST ME, once she knows it's over she will bounce back pretty quick, and she'll be rubbing other dudes in your face in no time. Toss her a bone when she does this and act a little jealous... it costs you nothing and makes her feel really good.

You do not have to be an @ss when you break up with a woman.
 

Bingo-Player

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nah fvck closure

dissapear and leave her on your hook for a couple of months then if you run into a dry spell youve got a lay available to you to get you going again

trust me done it hundreds of times

fvck one girl is still trying to get my attention 18 months later ( she is crazy tho)
 

El Payaso

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It depends. If she's been a very good girlfriend and it just can't work out due to circumstances out of both parties' control like an unexpected long distance move, wanting different things etc then it's best to just be upfront and be decisive.

If she's been a b*tch then she can go f*ck herself. Disappear off the face of the Earth and never give her another word.
 
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