What made you say TO HELL WITH THIS!!!

[Joe The Homophobe]

I'm just wondering what made you guys say TO HELL WITH THIS when it comes to your women problems and overall decision to change your ways. It could be your decision to stop being a nice guy, or to sarge, to learn PUA techniques, change your style etc. What happened? obviously this would take a little bit of soul searching and talking about "feelings" and stuff, but we are allowed to once in a while

I thought this would be a good exercise to get to know each other better and maybe provide better advice. Be honest though. Say something about the present and how things are now.

I have made 2 big decisions when it comes to women.

Why I started sargin
Mine was basically being a lazy procrastinator when it came to women. I'm a procrastinator with everything and the only times I had gf's was basically being at the right place at the right time. I have a lot of hobbies so I kept myself busy with them and didn't really see a need for a girlfriend. I thought I should just wait for another lucky situation where I would get asked out by a girl or through her friends. But then again God made Women so man wouldn't be lonely and even if you have hundreds of friends, you will still crave the touch and companionship of a good woman, just the way we are engineered I guess. I saw time pass by and I became a butt of jokes because when you're good looking and you don't have a gf people either think (and call you) gay or a metrosexual. So I got tired of the usual teasing from buddies. I never liked going to parties I hate b|tches and hos so those type of girls are not my type. This obviously cut my chances of meeting girls by like 80%. I just had to make a change because I was either gonna wait "to be at the right place at the right time" again for another 2 or so years, or just grab my balls and sarge. So I started sarging college campuses. For once in my life I had to actually work to get women myself, and not rely on good looks and the luck involved in girls getting the courage to ask me out directly or indirectly.

My other decision: NO MARIAGE! (well, not with an American one)
I lost the respect I had for women I really did. When I was a nice guy I believed in being a gentlemen and all that stuff because I believed women were special. Why should I be a gentleman to these HORS? just browse myspace and tell me how many female profiles you see which have pictures of the girl at some bar getting pissed drunk. Why should I be a "gentleman" to some hors that on the weekends get pissed drunk, puke and all that stuff and that is their idea of "fun." How can I be a gentleman to these HORS who on their profile which is their window to the world post such pictures? I would say 6 out of 10 female profiles have some reference to this. Where is their value? THEY HAVE NO VALUE! A woman's value is in their charm, morals, and the way they carry themselves (looks too). A woman without those qualities is just a walking vagina. Sure you find good hearted girls....IN THE 1950'S!

Being a gentlemen/nice guy to women got me nowhere, in fact it took me the opposite direction. As much as I didn't want to believe that women weren't so screwed up in the head to actually dislike gentlemen (in terms of what they want in a romantic partner) I realized it was true. Women don't like gentlemen/nice guys and this is not something they want in a romantic partner. Realizing this changed my life. Imagine one day walking around and realizing "you know what, just the way I carry myself makes me unattractive to women, but all I am is a decent, nice guy." It would be the same as if some hippi realized he was hated by women because he likes to save trees which is a good quality. Imagine being an intelligent guy and realizing women hate intelligence which is a good quality. I felt discriminated against FOR A GOOD QUALITY OF MINE!. So how can I marry women who actually discriminate against my very essence? this made me decide I just can't marry an American woman. Why should I when there are still plenty of traditional women from oversees who appreciate my good qualities.

This could also explain why I lost respect for women. They are just screwed up in the head. When they shun good qualities that is just screwed up in the head.

The Present
So right now I don't go out of my way to be nice, I don't go out of my way to be charming. I just behave normal and still refuse to behave like a jerk even though I know it would help me (but it would help me attract the type of females I don't want, which unfortunately are 90% of females). Recently I read a book called "mode one" which basically says be direct with women, tell them your intentions and if they don't like it, to hell with them! that method allowed me to still be a gentleman and not have to waste my time with women.

 

[Technical1]

I find your story resonates quite alot Joe since I experienced the same process (still am).

One girl I liked slept with a drug-addict, and two girls who I tried to bang slept with a homeless drifter. I snapped and said, "no more."

Being a gentlemen/nice guy to women got me nowhere, in fact it took me the opposite direction.

Really? I actually dont agree with this so much. I dont think women want a jerk per se. Its just that with women, you have to do two things: 1) initiate the relationship, 2) lead them to sex. Does doing cold approaches make you no longer a gentleman? Does talking to women at discos make you no longer a gentleman? Does making advances on a woman make you no longer a gentleman? I think you have stopped waiting for women to come to you- and this alone will up the number of women you have contact with 50x.
Dont you think its simply the fact that you get to know more women, and project yourself a little better?

As much as I didn't want to believe that women weren't so screwed up in the head to actually dislike gentlemen (in terms of what they want in a romantic partner) I realized it was true. Women don't like gentlemen/nice guys and this is not something they want in a romantic partner.

Women want someone who takes initiative, you basically have to build the whole affair yourself from scratch with her giving you minute "dont stop" signals. If by "gentleman" you mean, "someone who doesnt approach and close with women", then clearly, they dont like that person. I dont think thats the best definition of gentleman, because that makes every AFC in the world into a gentleman. Insofar as I have progressed towards being a DJ, I feel MORE like a gentleman, not less.

this made me decide I just can't marry an American woman. Why should I when there are still plenty of traditional women from oversees who appreciate my good qualities.

This is playing with fire and I would advise you against it. American girls are the same as women overseas, the upbringing is slightly different but the internal wiring is the same. Foreign women will be mysterious to you, because you can never see thru the veil of their cultural upbringing. That makes them more, not less, dangerous, and your relationships more likely to fail. Plus you're just lying to yourself, there are quality American hoes out there, you just dont want to put the effort in. Plus foreign women that you meet in America are 1) vulnerable because of new surroundings, 2) desire to make friends quickly, 3) outgoing in their nature because they decided to move to another country. You're taking the easy road, believe me. I say that as someone who has dated half American and half European broads, you are kidding yourself.

This could also explain why I lost respect for women. They are just screwed up in the head. When they shun good qualities that is just screwed up in the head.

I'm getting increasingly critical... but they are screwed up because enough of them didnt approach you? So women are meant to offer themselves to you as a gentleman, even though they dont know you, and then you take your pick? Doesnt that sound like a fantasy land?

 

[Answers]

I said to hell with it after getting nowhere with women all my life. I had that terrible feeling of helplessness where I hadn't a clue what I was doing wrong. I was so bad it was unreal. Even reading material on how to attract women helped but it was months after that i truly began to get it.

You (OP) don't seem to like women much. I've been there and know how you feel. I think you should look at things from a womans point of view though. Its not that their bad and want a bad boy. They feel attraction for the bad boy for a reason. Basically he has some good qualities that attract women. Women like men to have rules and like men who won't tolerate their bad behaviour and is willing to walk away from the relationship. You can still be nice and at the same time show them you're a no nonsense man.

 

[HandyAndy]

Getting no where with women as well. I found this site, and realized i was the total opposite of what i should be. Currently improving = D

 

[The Deacon]

I wanted HB 8s-10s, not HB7s and below. Considering girls think I'm a 9/10, I knew I could get better than what I was getting, so I started lookin up this stuff.

 

[Moofahsa]

Women lying to me and me finally realizing a I was a chump and getting used.

Been fine ever since

 

[Gustav Yavo]

umm, my story is the classic tale of a boy getting hurt by a girl he barely knew (even though he thought he knew her very well), and how he somewhat vowed to himself that he would try to never let that happen ever again.

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

You (OP) don't seem to like women much. I've been there and know how you feel.

not at all! I just no longer have the naive view I had when young that I have to be a gentleman with them, that I have to put them on a pedestal, that they are pure and honest and I should treat them differently, with more respect than I treat a man. Women are conniving, scheming, dirty liars! they are not pure, they are not honest, they are not the best thing on earth. Sure we all believed that in high school when we were just starting out in life and in relationships. I don't want you to think im some hateful, rude guy. I treat everyone with respect. I have respect for older women (40's and so on) because they were raised differently than this generation. The only good hearted women Ive met are in this age range and I respect them. These are true ladies. We shouldn't give the distinction of a "lady" to every young gal out there much like you don't call your average college guy a "gentleman." This is part of the matrix which brainwashes us into treating women differently and giving the distinction of a lady to every HOR out there!