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Valantines day! romance or fear?

jonwon

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So ideas on this day, would you consider romantic gestures on this day, to be bred from a genuine urge to be romantic to each other (including women to men) or do you think it’s bred on the fear of expectation or doing the right thing?

Me?
I think the day as become far too commercial and to me a romantic gesture should be spontaneous not derived from an idea of compliance to a routine.

It seems to me the idea of this day is pretty much devoid of its intention simply from its original purpose, do we really need a day to be romantic?

Is romance bred from a ritual date, is it now so ingrained in our society that it is not about romance anymore but about compliance and pressure to do the right thing? If so then to me that concept is bred from fear of loosing respect from your partner, that is they buy into the whole valentines day ritual, I mean if they 'expect' a return on valentines day, does that not defeat the whole point and one is simply complying to a ritual, I really cant see the romance in that in all fairness.

Is it not far better to do the things on valentines day at ones own discretion and desire to do those things instead of being expected to do it?

Would it not be better to be romantic when the situation is ripe for it?
Or when it totally unexpected which would get a much bigger return.

I read one article about a guy buying a women a whole house for half a million on this day! Nice gesture but not sure why that is romantic to buy your way to some-ones heart, was painful to read in truth how the women loved the gesture and how he loved to give it? Seems a little bizarre and extravagant gift, he must have felt it was worth doing, his money I guess. But the romantic notions where applied to this day, so he made it a romantic gesture, so again another attempt to show, it seemed to me, to win some-ones heart these days is to buy them something, the bigger the better. Yes it was a mainstream paper and yes they thought it was great he went to these extremes and yes they painted that this was the norm. Still can’t see how it was romantic in any way shape or form.

Ideas would be good.

Personnally i dislike this day, its nice dont get me wrong to go out on dates e.t.c but to be expected to do something seems to me devoid of the true intention. Makes me wonder if people celebrate this day to keep peace with the other half and not due to an actual desire to be romantic in anyway shape or form, since to me if they where romantic they would not need a specific day to do it, well not a ritual date anyhow.

Now if it became a national holiday then that would be great, i mean in the sense of a day off, i would not complain at all then :D
 

Mind_Body_Soul

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I read one article about a guy buying a women a whole house for half a million on this day!
LMAO - that's one expensive pu$$y and I'm sure that house will be great for all the real men that bang her in it.
 

Victory Unlimited

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Good post, JONWON.


Yeah, Valentine's Day celebration is indeed an odd mix of chivalry, feminism, and romanticism. It's as if our societys have come up with yet another way to tie a man's hands behind his back in the battle to maintain a healthy relationship with his particular woman.

On the one hand, women SAY that they crave SPONTANAEITY. Yet the very observance of Valentine's Day is a mandate that is in direct opposition to this concept. And as has been said COUNTLESS times before, it puts the woman on the throne while the man is relegated to "entertaining" her in order to please her and get her approval.

Over the past couple of days, I've heard and seen many womena act in many different ways. Some seem genuinely thankful and grateful to be appreciated by the men in their lives, but OTHERS act in ways that put a negative slant on the holiday.

Here's what I mean: Whenever the flowers, baskets, and dinner invitations were arriving at the office this week, SOME women verbally or nonverabally communicated these "inner" feelings to the careful observer (ME):

1. self-righteousness
2. competitiveness
3. greed
4. inconsideration
5. BRIEF bursts of happiness
6. selfishness
7. BOREDOM

Why boredom? Well, probably because for a lot of women (NOT ALL), Valentine's Day is a day where their sense of entitlement trumps their desire for spontanaeity. For women who feel THIS way, the man is in a lose/lose situation. He is made to feel obligated to do something, YET he also has to continue to "top" his LAST year's gift----otherwise the chick is BORED. Which in general, makes participation in this holiday of no benefit to the man who has a woman who reacts this way. Well maybe there IS one benefit---he can use it offer TEMPORARY appeasement to her----DANCE for my amusement, little monkey!

So what is the alternative?

I think it's always best to start off any V-Day gift giving with the simplest, most inexpensive, personal, and thoughtful tokens of appreciation. I believe if you train a woman that you are NOT a lemming like everybody else, and that you are NOT an extravagant or traditional kind of gift-giver FROM THE BEGINNING, it may be your best chance of keeping her expectations REASONABLE.

And if she balks, or bytches about what you give her from the beginning, THEN at least you know what kind of woman you got----AND the amount of attention from you she will expect as the relationship continues. Because what you'll have on your hands THEN is a woman who cares far more about impressing the OTHER women she feels she's in competition with, rather than YOU. Continue getting closer to her at your OWN risk...

So if any guy gets strong-armed into acquiesing to giving gifts to any woman that he'd rather not, then he can consider himself just one more casualty to something that is thought of as INTERNATIONAL FEMALE ATTENTION WHHORE ENTITLEMENT DAY by some, rather than just "Valentine's Day" for others...lol



Peace...one day.
 
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