The sh!t test everyone fails: 2

[starplayer]

OK first things first, if you haven’t already done so, check out this awesome thread by Squirrels. It’s a SS classic and was THE post that made me choose SS over all the other forums when things went wrong with a girl last year. This post rings so true for me, and seems to for many other guys as well. I’ve learnt this all through hard experience and observation.

The basic idea of it is that you game a girl, everything goes well, she’s high IL, you have the upper hand, etc. YOU HAVE HER! SHE’S YOURS!

The problem comes when you soon begin to fear losing her and revert to a needy AFC. You become desperate to hold on to something you never really expected to get in the first place. Predictably, she hits the road and goes for another guy.




The first page of Squirrels’ thread is spot on, I can’t fault it. However, I have to respectfully disagree with the second page.

This attempts to deal with the solution to the problem. Squirrels, the same as many others, explains the way “Naturals” pass the test is to basically have very strong inner game. To believe you deserve the girl. All you have to do is have natural confidence. Don’t be afraid of rejection.

But is this really the solution? Inner game is essential, yes. We should all strive to believe in ourselves and be confident. There’s no doubting that.

However, this is not the way “Naturals” get and keep girls. Naturals do have strong inner game. They do believe they deserve the girl. They do have natural confidence. They’re not afraid of rejection.

But why is this? It’s because they have something else so important that they can have that confidence: OPTIONS

The basis of their confidence is REAL OPTIONS. They actually have other girls or the absolute 100% certainty they can get them. I’m not talking about a mindset of “there are 3 billion other women”, etc. They don’t BELIEVE they can get other girls. They KNOW they can get other girls, beyond a shadow of a doubt. They have back-up plans and other girls that want them.

If you’re using games and tricks you can GET the girl. If you want a one night stand then it’s ok. But you cannot “fake it til you make it” to KEEP a girl. One day she’ll throw you a major sh!t test at you and you WILL fail. If you pretend to be something you're not, she WILL find out. It's just a matter of time.

Like Pook said, “Imitation is suicide”.

She WILL sniff you out. Women are biologically designed to test you til the end of time. Why? To see how much of a man you are? NO – it’s to see how desperate for her you are. She tests you to find out if you have options. She wants to know if you’re attractive to other girls, because that’s even more important to her than your looks.

You actually need to have abundance, not just an abundance mentality. You cannot trick your brain into believing you have options when you don’t.




So what’s the solution to keeping a girl interested? Get real options.

How do you do that? Raise your value to become a more naturally attractive person.

And how do you do that? Years of hard work and self-improvement.

There are no quick fixes and short cuts in this life, despite what some seduction gurus try and tell you. If you want to create attraction and get a quick lay then tricks and games will help enormously. But they won’t get you a girlfriend or even let you keep a fvck buddy for very long.

I know I’m probably preaching to the choir here and I know it’s all been said a million times before. That’s what makes this place so different from the rest. But it seems it can never be said enough.

 

[bluenorther]

This brings to my mind a breakup I had with a sweet, pretty 40-y.o. mom of three. After nine months of awesome sex, she told me that she'd signed up her kids for league sports, and it would take all her weekends, from March through November. I had no idea back then that it was a sh!t-test, but I called her on it, "I guess I need to find someone else."
I didn't get quite the response we would've hoped for...
She sprung the trap, and I was out of her life. Too bad, I genuinely liked her.
This could have gone either way, really, depending on how I reacted, but it sounded like she wanted it to end, regardless.

 

[Ease]

Yea. Id call this the problem of 'liking your gf too much'. She might be a great gf, but your being tied down and theres better out there.

Options can be the desire to go out and pull other girls. If i break up with my gf im gona lose the good sides of my relationship, but im gona be able to go out and pull girls and live like a rockstar.

I dont need plates to have the effect. And this isnt neceserily a principle to keep the girl interested, its more to keep yourself sane.

If i have no other options, no other thing to look forward to, other than my gf- im gona get needy. Im gona lose my alpha swagger.

Being single can be difficult, its not that easy to always pull and close, but if you focus on that then you're going to want to stay in your relationship. The correct mindset is to always keep your natural desire as a man to conquer as many different women.

Its nice to have a relationship and someone to care about u and all the good stuff, but im never going to worship my gf and declare my neverending love. She might be perfect, but theres flaws and im being tied down from closing new women.

This is the mindset to keep in the back of your mind. You are a stud and could potentially do better than your current gf, she is not perfect in every way and there is life outside of your relationship.

 

[DistrictofPenguins]

Yea. Id call this the problem of 'liking your gf too much'. She might be a great gf, but your being tied down and theres better out there.

Options can be the desire to go out and pull other girls. If i break up with my gf im gona lose the good sides of my relationship, but im gona be able to go out and pull girls and live like a rockstar.

I dont need plates to have the effect. And this isnt neceserily a principle to keep the girl interested, its more to keep yourself sane.

If i have no other options, no other thing to look forward to, other than my gf- im gona get needy. Im gona lose my alpha swagger.

Being single can be difficult, its not that easy to always pull and close, but if you focus on that then you're going to want to stay in your relationship. The correct mindset is to always keep your natural desire as a man to conquer as many different women.

Its nice to have a relationship and someone to care about u and all the good stuff, but im never going to worship my gf and declare my neverending love. She might be perfect, but theres flaws and im being tied down from closing new women.

This is the mindset to keep in the back of your mind. You are a stud and could potentially do better than your current gf, she is not perfect in every way and there is life outside of your relationship.

I agree with this. "Options" are only the result of having high confidence. As long as you're not letting the relationship consume YOUR life, and start getting all of your happiness from the relationship itself. It's great to be in love, but if you get too "high" you're going to crash. A relationship is merely there to supplement, and your life will still be YOUR life to live in the end.

You're only cheating yourself if you have the mindset that a relationship will provide something that's missing in your life, and you need to stop focusing on a relationship and start living your life and trying new things. Because until you know that a relationship is there to supplement the already kick-ass life you already live, you're not ready to be in one. In the end, the trick isn't as much about having options as it is about living life.