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Relationship are hard work no matter what

Pandora

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Relationships are hard work no matter what. My soon to be brother in law married a Muslim virgin. Good looking girl from a good intact family in a " Muslim" country.

They are having serious issues less than 2 yrs in. Shawty is a menace. Mouthy and kind of lazy.

I got a close friend of mine who married a Mormon girl. She was not a virgin ( I dont think) but her family was heavy in the church. They both were. Years later big divorce and she has jail time etc.

This whole thing is a giant crap shoot. Some people get very lucky and marry a sane person. For the rest of us we have to try our best to make our relationship a healthy one.

There is no better just trade offs. If you want sanity you have to trade off in looks. If you want maturity you have to trade off in age etc.

Im at the point of ima just marry this girl put a kid in her and prepare the best I can for some bullshyt. I dont know anymore.
 

MAB

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Relationships are hard work no matter what.
No, they are not ...

I found this forum through the book "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi and he keeps referencing this place. But it seems like everybody is terminally blue-pilled and hasn't at least read that book. What's going on here?

Im at the point of ima just marry this girl (...)
Who? Why?
 

Pandora

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No, they are not ...

I found this forum through the book "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi and he keeps referencing this place. But it seems like everybody is terminally blue-pilled and hasn't at least read that book. What's going on here?


Who? Why?
Why do you say relationships are not hard work? The numbers show otherwise.

I could be wrong but I rarely find happy healthy relationships past the honeymoon phase.

It is possible but it takes compromise ans growth.
 

pipeman84

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That's like saying being trim and fit is hard work, when all one does is eating junk food and laying on the sofa or alternatively setting the alarm clock to 5am (messing up his sleep) and drive to the gym in order to walk on the treadmill and look on social media. :rolleyes:

If a guy enters in a relationship with a woman who just isn't wife material (there's the saying, you can't turn a hoe into a housewife) or who just doesn't love him, then what do you expect?
 

MAB

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Why do you say relationships are not hard work?
I think your idea of a "relationship" is the whole modern man-woman are partners and friends nonsense. That's why you think they are work.

My partners and friends are my male friends. Women are for sexual gratification and reproduction only. And in modern times they are doing a piss poor job at it.
 

Pandora

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I think your idea of a "relationship" is the whole modern man-woman are partners and friends nonsense. That's why you think they are work.

My partners and friends are my male friends. Women are for sexual gratification and reproduction only. And in modern times they are doing a piss poor job at it.
Im talking about in modern times because we live in modern times unfortunately.

Yes i agree in the natural world relationships are a little easier. In a highly developed industrial economy relationships are very difficult to maintain.

If relationships were so easy then you would not be on SoSuave.
 

Pandora

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Even though relationships are hard they are rewarding. You grew immensely when you learn to get along with your partner.

Your partner is a mirror that reflects the beautiful and the ugly parts of your personality.
 

MAB

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If relationships were so easy then you would not be on SoSuave.
I do not have relationships with women in the modern sense and that's why my relationships don't involve any work.

I am here to give people advice and for the entertainment value.

Even though relationships are hard they are rewarding. You grew immensely when you learn to get along with your partner.
If by "partner" you mean some woman then you aren't "growing", you are just being feminized.
 

Ricky

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I used to think they weren’t hard work because my wife made things so easy compared to other women i dated.

that worked well for over 14 years. We were happy but she claims she was building some resentments because of how i treated her.

i did live like a king for that time. No regrets but hate how it has been since.
 

Pandora

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I do not have relationships with women in the modern sense and that's why my relationships don't involve any work.

I am here to give people advice and for the entertainment value.


If by "partner" you mean some woman then you aren't "growing", you are just being feminized.
Okay well I am talking to the men that are trying to settle down with a woman for the formation of a family. That takes work no matter where on earth you try.
 

Pandora

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I used to think they weren’t hard work because my wife made things so easy compared to other women i dated.

that worked well for over 14 years. We were happy but she claims she was building some resentments because of how i treated her.

i did live like a king for that time. No regrets but hate how it has been since.
Exactly. It takes work because you have to be on the same page for 40 dang years. Yes things might seem to be doing well for 13yrs but what about the 14th yr. What if that person you met has changed etc.

It really takes patience and comprise to last forever. Some get lucky and do it.
 

Pandora

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That's like saying being trim and fit is hard work, when all one does is eating junk food and laying on the sofa or alternatively setting the alarm clock to 5am (messing up his sleep) and drive to the gym in order to walk on the treadmill and look on social media. :rolleyes:

If a guy enters in a relationship with a woman who just isn't wife material (there's the saying, you can't turn a hoe into a housewife) or who just doesn't love him, then what do you expect?
But even the ones that are wife material and do " love" their man it takes work. When you are used to living the player lifestyle transitioning to a serious relationship lifestyle is hard. Relationship skills take a long time to acquire no matter who you are dating.

Also can we stop with the "wife material" nonsense. Very few women are wife material. The divorce rate is almost 60% and the other 30% are unhappy af. Only about 10% of marriages are happy.
 

pipeman84

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But even the ones that are wife material and do " love" their man it takes work.
But the key difference is that you don't see it as work. Just as a guy who eats tasty healthy food and sleeps well doesn't see it as work to go to the gym.
Also can we stop with the "wife material" nonsense. Very few women are wife material.
Indeed, and that's evident very soon in the dating process. Therefore when the guy knowingly chooses to enter a relationship with the wrong woman, then he shouldn't complain about it.
 

Pandora

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But the key difference is that you don't see it as work. Just as a guy who eats tasty healthy food and sleeps well doesn't see it as work to go to the gym.

Indeed, and that's evident very soon in the dating process. Therefore when the guy knowingly chooses to enter a relationship with the wrong woman, then he shouldn't complain about it.
Thats the scary part bro. They all seem to turn out to be the wrong woman eventually. This is especially true for the younger ones. GenZ girls are done no matter what culture they come from. My brother in law literally married a pure girl from a Muslim family and he still has to threaten to kick her out virtually every other month. Btw this dude is handsome, has his own business, makes money and got girls before her.

I think the only happy couples are the ones with SMV's so low that they know that they cant act up. Or its just a crap shoot. Idk man. Do you know many truly happy couples?
 

pipeman84

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My brother in law literally married a pure girl from a Muslim family and he still has to threaten to kick her out virtually every other month. Btw this dude is handsome, has his own business, makes money and got girls before her.
Then the guy has no excuse. Some people just have to learn their lessons the hard way.
Do you know many truly happy couples?
How many truly happy people are there? :rolleyes: That's the reason why there are few happy couples. It's simple arithmetic: unhappy man + unhappy woman = unhappy couple.
 

Bokanovsky

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Relationships are hard work no matter what. My soon to be brother in law married a Muslim virgin. Good looking girl from a good intact family in a " Muslim" country.

They are having serious issues less than 2 yrs in. Shawty is a menace. Mouthy and kind of lazy.

I got a close friend of mine who married a Mormon girl. She was not a virgin ( I dont think) but her family was heavy in the church. They both were. Years later big divorce and she has jail time etc.

This whole thing is a giant crap shoot. Some people get very lucky and marry a sane person. For the rest of us we have to try our best to make our relationship a healthy one.

There is no better just trade offs. If you want sanity you have to trade off in looks. If you want maturity you have to trade off in age etc.

Im at the point of ima just marry this girl put a kid in her and prepare the best I can for some bullshyt. I dont know anymore.
Just because she's a virgin from a "good family" does not automatically make her a good person or a suitable mate. Being a virgin in a Muslim country is not exactly a huge accomplishment. It's about as hard as not being overweight in Ethiopia but I digress.
 

Bokanovsky

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I used to think they weren’t hard work because my wife made things so easy compared to other women i dated.

that worked well for over 14 years. We were happy but she claims she was building some resentments because of how i treated her.

i did live like a king for that time. No regrets but hate how it has been since.
Interesting. Do you think that her resentment is justified or is it an excuse to move to greener pastures?
 

Pandora

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Just because she's a virgin from a "good family" does not automatically make her a good person or a suitable mate. Being a virgin in a Muslim country is not exactly a huge accomplishment. It's about as hard as not being overweight in Ethiopia but I digress.
Yeh exactly. I agree.
 

BadBoy89

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Even though relationships are hard they are rewarding. You grew immensely when you learn to get along with your partner.
So I cannot grow immensely if I have sex with 30 hot girls under 30?
 
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