Nightmare Scheduled Date This Evening - Bullet Dodged?

[CheekyMonkey101]

I was going to meet an attractive 26yr old Colombian girl from Hinge this evening at 6pm.

Unfortunately, something came up at my house which needed urgent attention, which meant I would be around 15-20 minutes late. I messaged her to tell her this, apologise and that I was on my way.

However, she said that she won't wait 20 minutes but we can reschedule. I then said I don't know when I was next free (my schedule is a bit hectic ATM and I was already dressed up and heading down so I didn't really want to reschedule). She then said that we can just meet up when I know my schedule better.

I then said I'm only about 10 minutes away so I'd see her soon but she said not to bother as she's already left. I then said "okay" and then unfollowed her on Instagram.

Was I too abrupt or was she just too impatient? I did tell her I'd be slightly late and apologised. 20 minutes is hardly completely outrageous but I understand it isn't a good look for me. Maybe I dodged a bullet if she's this impatient and probably wasn't high interest to begin with.

 

[BPH]

You dodged a bullet. On to the next.

 

[Clockwerk50]

In my opinion, unfollowing her when it was your fault for being late comes across as a bit abrupt, passive-aggressive, and lacking emotional control.

On the other hand, if she was unwilling to wait 20 minutes, it could mean she either takes punctuality very seriously, had other commitments, or simply wasn’t that interested in the first place.

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

In my opinion, unfollowing her when it was your fault for being late comes across as a bit abrupt, passive-aggressive, and lacking emotional control.

On the other hand, if she was unwilling to wait 20 minutes, it could mean she either takes punctuality very seriously, had other commitments, or simply wasn’t that interested in the first place.

I'd just say she wasn't that interested given she wasn't willing to wait.

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

You dodged a bullet. On to the next.

Yeah, seems spoiled.

 

[BPH]

Yeah, seems spoiled.

If you want a deeper analysis, from my experience, these are usually the type of women to expect to be courted and placed on a pedestal.

Being late, even if you apologized and let her know, means you don't respect her time as much as she expects you to - at least in her mind. She most likely sees sex as a "gift" to you if you do well enough on the date. They are often used to men jumping through hoops for them, and will usually see her contribution to the interaction as simply being available and giving you the time of day.

Furthermore, the women in my life who I've met and said they're "worth the wait" in any variation of the phrase, never were.

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

If you want a deeper analysis, from my experience, these are usually the type of women to expect to be courted and placed on a pedestal.

Being late, even if you apologized and let her know, means you don't respect her time as much as she expects you to - at least in her mind. She most likely sees sex as a "gift" to you if you do well enough on the date. They are often used to men jumping through hoops for them, and will usually see her contribution to the interaction as simply being available and giving you the time of day.

Furthermore, the women in my life who I've met and said they're "worth the wait" in any variation of the phrase, never were.

Yeah, that's what I thought. She expects men to bend over backwards.

I said that I didn't know when I'm free (kind of true) when she offered to reschedule and didn't really give an answer when she said we can meet when I know when I'm free. If she's like this on a first date then she's likely a pain.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Unfortunately, something came up at my house which needed urgent attention...

An hour before hooking up with some broad is the LEAST ideal time to guzzle down a gallon of Metamucil, ESPECIALLY when the only crapper in the house has a history of clogging that's ten times the length of Lebron's schlong

 

[BPH]

An hour before hooking up with some broad is the LEAST ideal time to guzzle down a gallon of Metamucil, ESPECIALLY when the only crapper in the house has a history of clogging that's ten times the length of Lebron's schlong

You know, I'm still not totally sure you're a real person and not a bot.

Almost every reply you leave has some sort of analogy using a pop culture reference or historic event.

 

[BaronOfHair]

You know, I'm still not totally sure you're a real person and not a bot

We're entering the age of transhumanism: Don't assume I'm not a hybrid of BOTH

 

[BillyPilgrim]

If you want a deeper analysis, from my experience, these are usually the type of women to expect to be courted and placed on a pedestal.

A Catholic girl in other words

 

[Oatmeal31]

In my opinion, unfollowing her when it was your fault for being late comes across as a bit abrupt, passive-aggressive, and lacking emotional control.

On the other hand, if she was unwilling to wait 20 minutes, it could mean she either takes punctuality very seriously, had other commitments, or simply wasn’t that interested in the first place.

Disagree. He didn't blow up or anything. He just unfollowed her, because why would he after that? Not that serious

 

[nismo-4]

Enter the judge.

In my opinion, unfollowing her when it was your fault for being late comes across as a bit abrupt, passive-aggressive, and lacking emotional control.

Women take male flake excuses differently because they always have backups. Sometimes things for men do come up. Men do have problems. When a man flakes, he HAS TO. When a woman flakes, she HAS TWO. He did right to unfollow. Why be a fan?

On the other hand, if she was unwilling to wait 20 minutes, it could mean she either takes punctuality very seriously, had other commitments, or simply wasn’t that interested in the first place.

I'm betting on she wasn't that interested. Would she do this if this were Enrique Iglesias or Rafael Nadal? She'd make sure this date happened later today, if not another day. Oh, she went with another guy who wanted to take her zip lining.

Read betwe- Pick up my mic, I'll get another one.

Case closed. OP, Get another girl.

 

[The Duke]

Her interest level wasn't there.

Always ask yourself this....."If I was George Clooney, would she mind waiting 15-20 minutes?"

Her response would have been, no problem. Take your time. I'll be waiting for you!

I look at these things as insight into how they function. Is their life so damn perfect that they get bent when asked to wait 15-20minutes for a date. I don't want someone in my life that can't be a little flexible. You weren't asking for much, and showed courtesty to notify her ahead of time.

 

[Solomon]

If you want a deeper analysis, from my experience, these are usually the type of women to expect to be courted and placed on a pedestal.

Being late, even if you apologized and let her know, means you don't respect her time as much as she expects you to - at least in her mind. She most likely sees sex as a "gift" to you if you do well enough on the date. They are often used to men jumping through hoops for them, and will usually see her contribution to the interaction as simply being available and giving you the time of day.

Furthermore, the women in my life who I've met and said they're "worth the wait" in any variation of the phrase, never were.

This is spot on, in basic terms, she has low interest. These are the type of women that will disqualify you for the pettiest of reasons cause they ain't into you like that. A woman who is would have no problem waiting. I remember several years ago I was meeting a gir(Colombian as well) on a date and she said she was going to be late. I waited 15 minutes then left because, honestly, I wasn't interested in her.

Years later we matched on a dating app again and she brought it up, But for the longest I did not remember because my memory ever since I hit 30 sucks and honestly she looked better in her newer pics

In my opinion, unfollowing her when it was your fault for being late comes across as a bit abrupt, passive-aggressive, and lacking emotional control.

I disagree with this, I agree that OP is at fault but shyt happens, sometimes people need to give other's grace something severely lacking in modern times. The woman couldn't even wait 20 minutes I get it, it's rude but I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Heck I had a coffee date almost 2 months ago, and a girl showed up 20 minutes late due to Traffic. . I don't see the point of following a woman on social media after a situation like this. For me it's not passive aggressiveness. The woman has made it clear she is not interested in OP. so why bother still following her? Sometimes it's not all about "Gaming" or "lacking emotional control" in this situation, it's about walking away with dignity and self-respect


@CheekyMonkey101 I wouldn't worry about it to much bro shyt happens, and this girl either wasn't that interested or thought you were standing her up. Believe it or not but this is something seldom talked about but women do get stood up on dates or last-minute flakes etc. I wouldn't worry it about and move on to the next

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

Her interest level wasn't there.

Always ask yourself this....."If I was George Clooney, would she mind waiting 15-20 minutes?"

Her response would have been, no problem. Take your time. I'll be waiting for you!

I look at these things as insight into how they function. Is their life so damn perfect that they get bent when asked to wait 15-20minutes for a date. I don't want someone in my life that can't be a little flexible. You weren't asking for much, and showed courtesty to notify her ahead of time.

Yeah those are fair points. She seemed quite interested over DMs but I guess you can never really tell.

Onto the next.

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

This is spot on, in basic terms, she has low interest. These are the type of women that will disqualify you for the pettiest of reasons cause they ain't into you like that. A woman who is would have no problem waiting. I remember several years ago I was meeting a gir(Colombian as well) on a date and she said she was going to be late. I waited 15 minutes then left because, honestly, I wasn't interested in her.

Years later we matched on a dating app again and she brought it up, But for the longest I did not remember because my memory ever since I hit 30 sucks and honestly she looked better in her newer pics




I disagree with this, I agree that OP is at fault but shyt happens, sometimes people need to give other's grace something severely lacking in modern times. The woman couldn't even wait 20 minutes I get it, it's rude but I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Heck I had a coffee date almost 2 months ago, and a girl showed up 20 minutes late due to Traffic. . I don't see the point of following a woman on social media after a situation like this. For me it's not passive aggressiveness. The woman has made it clear she is not interested in OP. so why bother still following her? Sometimes it's not all about "Gaming" or "lacking emotional control" in this situation, it's about walking away with dignity and self-respect


@CheekyMonkey101 I wouldn't worry about it to much bro shyt happens, and this girl either wasn't that interested or thought you were standing her up. Believe it or not but this is something seldom talked about but women do get stood up on dates or last-minute flakes etc. I wouldn't worry about and on to the next

Yeah, I agree. It's disappointing but it happens.

She did offer to reschedule a few times but tbh I had already gotten dressed up and was on my way so I really couldn't be bothered to rearrange as it was pretty annoying.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Disagree. He didn't blow up or anything. He just unfollowed her, because why would he after that? Not that serious

I disagree with this, I agree that OP is at fault but shyt happens, sometimes people need to give other's grace something severely lacking in modern times. The woman couldn't even wait 20 minutes I get it, it's rude but I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Heck I had a coffee date almost 2 months ago, and a girl showed up 20 minutes late due to Traffic. . I don't see the point of following a woman on social media after a situation like this. For me it's not passive aggressiveness. The woman has made it clear she is not interested in OP. so why bother still following her? Sometimes it's not all about "Gaming" or "lacking emotional control" in this situation, it's about walking away with dignity and self-respect

I feel like by unfollowing her on Instagram right after she declined to wait, OP may have come across as reactive or extremely impulsive. That said, the woman was also impatient and maybe she saw the delay as a red flag. In the end, chalk it up to incompatibility, with both playing the role of the moral police: judging each other based on rigid standards instead of adapting to the situation. Neither seemed willing to give the other the benefit of the doubt, and that’s where things fell apart.

Personally, I would’ve just left the door open and waited to see if she followed up; maybe even suggesting a meetup closer to OP’s area, especially since she had already proposed rescheduling multiple times. Next time, it might help OP to pause before making a reactive decision in the moment.

Still, it would be a good idea if OP would tell us what the urgent issue was or why his schedule is so hectic. Maybe there’s room to improve his time management so this doesn’t happen again.

 

[justaroundthecorner]

I'd just say she wasn't that interested given she wasn't willing to wait.

I always had issues with being on time. Years ago I dated one of my former girlfriends that was crazy about punctuality. I was 5 mins late and she was already pointing out to me that I was late - if I was late 20 mins she put me through her rage mantras how I do not respect her time, our relationship, our 'love'.

The fact was she was cold-heart woman that wanted to be pedestalised and had dominant character (nevertheless lacking skills of true leader, one of them being empathy and understanding - also that me being late does not necessarily mean any of things she accused me of - I was genuinely interested in her and loved her at some point).

Your almost-date girl behaviour shows she is either immature, cold-hearted/dominant princess type and/or interest level was not high enough. What's interesting however is that prolly she was right to some extent - if you would thought she is 10/10 would you allow yourself to be late under any circumstances?

I'd say you did correct with unfollowing her on IG - people should learn proper manners (the proper reaction is to wait for someone who is late, then the person who is late says 'sorry' and both sides go through with the meeting, while party that was late may somehow warm up the strained opening by putting but more on it's bill or proposing some really cool place for the next meeting').

Moreover, if she did not want to wait for you 20 mins, the next (rescheduled) date was highly improbable.

 

[CheekyMonkey101]

I

I always had issues with being on time. Years ago I dated one of my former girlfriends that was crazy about punctuality. I was 5 mins late and she was already pointing out to me that I was late - if I was late 20 mins she put me through her rage mantras how I do not respect her time, our relationship, our 'love'.

The fact was she was cold-heart woman that wanted to be pedestalised and had dominant character (nevertheless lacking skills of true leader, one of them being empathy and understanding - also that me being late does not necessarily mean any of things she accused me of - I was genuinely interested in her and loved her at some point).

Your almost-date girl behaviour shows she is either immature, cold-hearted/dominant princess type and/or interest level was not high enough. What's interesting however is that prolly she was right to some extent - if you would thought she is 10/10 would you allow yourself to be late under any circumstances?

I'd say you did correct with unfollowing her on IG - people should learn proper manners (the proper reaction is to wait for someone who is late, then the person who is late says 'sorry' and both sides go through with the meeting, while party that was late may somehow warm up the strained opening by putting but more on it's bill or proposing some really cool place for the next meeting').

Moreover, if she did not want to wait for you 20 mins, the next (rescheduled) date was highly improbable.

Ironically she did message me after and said that we could meet next week. I'll see how it goes, she is pretty attractive but it is a bit alarming how strict she was, but I should be on time in future.