My Wife Offered Me A Hall Pass w/ No Strings Attached...

[Money & Muscle]

You really seem to be a case of someone that cannot come to terms with the decisions you've made in life. Getting married and starting a family before sowing your wild oats

I mean, I've been pretty clear that this is the case but yes.

Getting married at 21 isn't advisable. Getting married to your first lay, is also not advisable.

 

[Money & Muscle]

After further discussion, my wife *did* mean that she would give me a hall pass - but it was apparent that she wouldn't be happy about it.

She's relieved that I turned it down and said she feels like she's able to be more vulnerable with me. I need to calibrate better and fog more; I've been dismissing her feelings rather than fogging them. Not that she understands this, but I can read between the lines.

If a threesome ever is on the table, it is more likely to happen as a result of my turning it down. Either way, I made my bed with this and I'm going to lay in it.

 

[Michael Chief]

Poly, in its simplest terms, means that the woman gets farked by other men, and you can be sure the women see a lot more penis than the man sees vagina.

It's woke shyte, it's in no way masculine or dominant - poly folks can tell themselves whatever they'd like.

It's not enlightened, it's cuckoldry.

Not in my experience!

It pays to know game and to be good at it, to say the least.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Not in my experience!

It pays to know game and to be good at it, to say the least.

Of course not…it doesn’t support your stance.

I’ve been on the fringes of the poly life happily banging polysluts, recreational use only. To a woman they just loved cawk, or at least mine hehe.

True story: one said that she loved bringing my loads home inside her and then having her partner go down on her, (unbeknownst to him) having an agreement with him that they’d only use condoms with others.

He had insisted they open the marriage for years and she didn’t want to, then she decided she might as well enjoy it but decided to get payback that way.

Similar first hand experiences with different polysloots, and it was some variation of that. What’s funny is they’re always telling you how ethical they are, and trying to get you to approve of their lifestyle. All you have to do to get rid of one fast is disagree with their fantastical thinking.

Of course, you’ll say they weren’t real polys or some such tripe.

I’m simply calling a spade a spade, you can try to white wash it all you want it will not change the truth.

Poly guys can enjoy their women’s whitewashed vulvas…to each their own.

 

[Money & Muscle]

Yeah, I'm not doing any poly stuff. Not even close.

Guys doing this are literal cucks, even if they don't think so.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

Here's the thing a lot of posters here haven't picked up on, that this actually kills 2 birds with 1 stone, but you have to do it correctly.

She is trying to take power back in the relationship and come back into her own energy so to speak, so let her do that by finding the partner for you, let her do all the leg work, let her control the experience, let her set the boundaries, I mean if you go through with the 3some and let her control it, how could she possibly blame you if she doesn't like it?

Here's where this goes wrong: if you approach this from a standpoint of equality... You can have some strange with her oversight but she cannot have some strange with or without yours, so if your approaching this as her husband, your not going to be able to reign her in, you can't just be the husband anymore, now it's time to evolve, now you become the commander, the leader, you set her on the task of finding a 3some and let her find the woman and let her manifest the experience, you are simply an actor in her play, but once you've played your part, you need to find the discipline to get back to your seat as commander, she falls into line once more and you almost role play, have fun with it.

Give her this domain but remember to maintain the boundaries and be the commander, as well as the follower. These days you may also need to set boundaries between the women which is just a whole other thing players really never had to deal with before so you gotta really watch for bad apples and reserve the right to eject any broad for any reason.

Note most of the commentors will say this will fail and they aren't wrong, this is definitely a hail Mary

 

[CountSuavula]

This stuff is truly expert level but my two cents is

The OP’s profile photograph screams douchebag beyond repair.

You should not even be “married” to be honest.

Do you even know what “married“ means?

You are obviously forsaking the sanctity of it all.

Otherwise, game on brother. She gave you the green light to screw and cheat until your eventually arrest. I’ve seen this stuff before because I am more experienced man.

In the end you will respect women in a better way.

 

[Money & Muscle]

Here's where this goes wrong: if you approach this from a standpoint of equality

Yeah, this doesn't happen in my marriage. We aren't equals, and it's better that way.

let her do that by finding the partner for you, let her do all the leg work, let her control the experience, let her set the boundaries

This is the only way it will work, if ever. For the time being, threesomes isn't even a conversation topic. I wasn't the one to bring it up this time, but it needs to be tabled for a bit.

She is slightly more open to the idea now that I've turned it down, because women are highly logical creatures

 

[Money & Muscle]

The OP’s profile photograph screams douchebag beyond repair.

Man, you haven't even met me yet. Just wait, I can do better.

You should not even be “married” to be honest.

You're probably right, but I'm dealing with the decisions I made as a young man. Learning to cope with those decisions is admittedly harder than I believed them to be.

It was easy to marry my first lay at 21. Of course I wanted to lock that down!

But now almost a decade later, I'm better looking, understand women far better, got over my approach anxiety, and clear about 150k/yr. I didn't know how women really acted around men they wanted to be with, and now I do.

It's hard to look back at that decision, because I did not know what I would eventually be missing out on. Of course, my own marriage is also something I need to be wary of missing out on.

In the end you will respect women in a better way.

I doubt this is the case, but I would understand them better - and come to better understand myself in the process.

Read up a few posts; I'm not going through with it unless the wife is involved, but the conversation is on hold for a while.

 

[kleathe1]

I've thought about it for a couple days now, before I even posted this. I'm quite certain of where I stand, and that is "threesome with my wife or not at all". Keep in mind that I did not bring up my fantasy here - my wife brought it up. I will keep an eye out for suspicious behavior, but I am doubtful my wife is looking for permission on her end.

I very much appreciate the words here, from everyone. I have few friends so these topics help me tremendously with perspective. It is likely a different level of sh*t/comfort test.

I'll talk with the woman. "I want to have this experience in my life, but only if it's with you."

Don't forget the part where the 3some usually ends up with one of them jealous because you will show one of them more attention whether or not you are conscious of it...let's say your wife agrees to do it with you...who will get more of your attention? My bet is the other girl will since it will be novelty to you...do you think your wife will ever forget that?

 

[Money & Muscle]

Don't forget the part where the 3some usually ends up with one of them jealous because you will show one of them more attention whether or not you are conscious of it...let's say your wife agrees to do it with you...who will get more of your attention? My bet is the other girl will since it will be novelty to you...do you think your wife will ever forget that?

IF this ever happens, I intend it to be such that my wife and I enjoy this other chick, together.

 

[Michael Chief]

Of course not…it doesn’t support your stance.

I’ve been on the fringes of the poly life happily banging polysluts, recreational use only. To a woman they just loved cawk, or at least mine hehe.

True story: one said that she loved bringing my loads home inside her and then having her partner go down on her, (unbeknownst to him) having an agreement with him that they’d only use condoms with others.

He had insisted they open the marriage for years and she didn’t want to, then she decided she might as well enjoy it but decided to get payback that way.

Similar first hand experiences with different polysloots, and it was some variation of that. What’s funny is they’re always telling you how ethical they are, and trying to get you to approve of their lifestyle. All you have to do to get rid of one fast is disagree with their fantastical thinking.

Of course, you’ll say they weren’t real polys or some such tripe.

I’m simply calling a spade a spade, you can try to white wash it all you want it will not change the truth.

Poly guys can enjoy their women’s whitewashed vulvas…to each their own.

People in supposedly mono relationships oftentimes do horrible, unethical things as well.

Just sayin.

 

[Money & Muscle]

Stop acting like you scored four touchdowns in a single game while playing for the Polk High School Panthers in the 1966 city championship game versus Andrew Johnson High School, including the game-winning touchdown in the final seconds against your old nemesis, "Spare Tire" Dixon

This doesn't sound like projection at all. /s/

Besides, I sucked at football.

 

[CountSuavula]

read what be excellent wrote.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Dude, you’re clueless. You’re married with kids.

Stop acting like you scored four touchdowns in a single game while playing for the Polk High School Panthers in the 1966 city championship game versus Andrew Johnson High School, including the game-winning touchdown in the final seconds against your old nemesis, "Spare Tire" Dixon

Clear eyes, full hearts can’t lose

 

[CountSuavula]

She cheated on him (probably a lot) before she said it’s cool and he is still clueless. 99.9% chance of that.

Women are expert cheaters.

 

[Money & Muscle]

She cheated on him (probably a lot) before she said it’s cool and he is still clueless. 99.9% chance of that.

Women are expert cheaters.

You know, I'm right here dude - no need to talk about me in third person.

I'll admit it's possible she's cheated, but I doubt it.

 

[DJ Novice]

Your marriage will never be the same if you indulge in your fantasy with your wife. There’s a real chance it will implode. S*xual jealousy is hard to overcome.
My advice is to stick to porn and find some good sites or actresses you enjoy, discretely hire a few escorts and keep your mouth shut or divorce your wife and run riot.

 

[Desdinova]

Anyways, she flips script and starts talking about my well-known FMF threesome fantasy. Says she's not into it and never will be, then gives me a hall pass to do this on my own.

I'm not going to say that this is completely a trap. It's possible your wife may have been wanting to get rid of you for a while and you've presented the perfect excuse for her to do it. It's that, or she made the decision in the moment of how she felt. Either she gave you permission to do it just because she was annoyed with you, or she gave you permission because she really doesn't give a damn about the marriage.

my wife (reportedly bisexual)

I am convinced at least 50% of bisexual women are only bisexual because they've already been alpha-widowed and cannot find a man who lives up to her high expectations.

Those are my warnings. I think you'd be better off outright cheating on her and arranging a threesome elsewhere if you actually want to live out this fantasy. Then you can just wash your hands of both chicks without fvcking up your marriage. I'd say the odds are better if you do that instead of trying to hold your marriage together after the threesome.

You're also forgetting rule #1: NEVER listen to a woman's words.

 

[Barrister]

OP,

I am going to be completely frank with you. You seem like a guy with a good head on your shoulders. But you aren't happy with your wife at all. She likely feels the same way. Just get it over with and divorce her. You, and your kids if you have them (can't remember), will all be better off if you cut your losses and get out. The only thing you are risking at this point is making yourself look like a POS to members of your family, her family, your profession, and community. Relationship fall out is a real thing. It can impact other parts of your life. Trust me on that.

Just file divorce and cut your losses. You will be a much happier guy with your freedom back even if your wallet will be a bit lighter for a time. This kind of 3 some thing is just the latest evidence you need to end things now and not later. Sure, you can try the cheating avenue. But again, this can impact other parts of your life if the wrong people find out. So tread carefully.