Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Man, I just give up on this whole thing

comic_relief

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Am I the only one that doesn't care about the game at this point anymore? I do what I want and generally I always come out with an awesome girlfriend or fvck buddy that becomes a girlfriend (I qualify girls if they are good enough before I even think about fvcking them. Always think long term because afterwards if you ain't careful than you might just be dealing with them long term)? I just don't care about it because I've learned how to "compete" for female attention and it has nothing to do with the shirt that I wear or the car I drive. It has everything to do with screening for higher quality women AND having your own interesting life. I just stopped caring about it a while ago *shrugs and :whistle:*

The fretting of "There are no good girls out there that are single" BS that I hear all the time on this website aren't really true. The good ones are generally in a relationship but there are many that are not in a relationship that could very well be. Its the same with men for women, sure there are plenty of great guys out there but they are also in relationships. The dating pool that is left over after the good guys and girls are out of it are considerably worse off. This is why women always say "I wish that there were good guys out there." If they say that to you, than it means you aren't interesting enough or something. Not their fault, its yours. Go make your life interesting. As Pook would say "Be your best self"
satelliteparties said:
Why doesn't this problem get more attention?

I have a few theories, but I'd be interested in hearing more.

- Most guys are happy to have "any" girlfriend/wife and date/marry some UG3 and look at porn on the side.

- Some guys lucked out somehow and got a girl out of their league with similar social circles or money. Some of these women may even be low quality (personality wise) but the guy puts up with the personality because of her looks.

- Or very simply, a lot of guys just don't care about this stuff as much for whatever reason, and maybe belong to the 1 or 2 category.
The "problem" doesn't get much attention because a person can actually improve themselves instead of whine about it incessently. This site is built around the idea that we can get girls through self-improvement. Constant b!tching about women is a detractor from that goal and therefore doesn't warrant serious attention (blowing off steam like this poster is doing is alright, but constant b!tching is useless).

Also, there is a fourth category that states "I got a good girl and am happy about being with the woman that I am with. I improved myself to the point where I am allowed to be happy now and look upon the fruits of my labor that took me years to get to this point." Simplistic way of looking at life generally doesn't get you anywhere in the real world because most of life is much more difficult than that (i.e. political discussions especially).

- comic_relief
 

comic_relief

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Am I the only one that doesn't care about the game at this point anymore? I do what I want and generally I always come out with an awesome girlfriend or fvck buddy that becomes a girlfriend (I qualify girls if they are good enough before I even think about fvcking them. Always think long term because afterwards if you ain't careful than you might just be dealing with them long term)? I just don't care about it because I've learned how to "compete" for female attention and it has nothing to do with the shirt that I wear or the car I drive. It has everything to do with screening for higher quality women AND having your own interesting life. I just stopped caring about it a while ago *shrugs and :whistle:*

The fretting of "There are no good girls out there that are single" BS that I hear all the time on this website aren't really true. The good ones are generally in a relationship but there are many that are not in a relationship that could very well be. Its the same with men for women, sure there are plenty of great guys out there but they are also in relationships. The dating pool that is left over after the good guys and girls are out of it are considerably worse off. This is why women always say "I wish that there were good guys out there." If they say that to you, than it means you aren't interesting enough or something. Not their fault, its yours. Go make your life interesting. As Pook would say "Be your best self"
satelliteparties said:
Why doesn't this problem get more attention?

I have a few theories, but I'd be interested in hearing more.

- Most guys are happy to have "any" girlfriend/wife and date/marry some UG3 and look at porn on the side.

- Some guys lucked out somehow and got a girl out of their league with similar social circles or money. Some of these women may even be low quality (personality wise) but the guy puts up with the personality because of her looks.

- Or very simply, a lot of guys just don't care about this stuff as much for whatever reason, and maybe belong to the 1 or 2 category.
The "problem" doesn't get much attention because a person can actually improve themselves instead of whine about it incessently. This site is built around the idea that we can get girls through self-improvement. Constant b!tching about women is a detractor from that goal and therefore doesn't warrant serious attention (blowing off steam like this poster is doing is alright, but constant b!tching is useless).

Also, there is a fourth category that states "I got a good girl and am happy about being with the woman that I am with. I improved myself to the point where I am allowed to be happy now and look upon the fruits of my labor that took me years to get to this point." Simplistic way of looking at life generally doesn't get you anywhere in the real world because most of life is much more difficult than that (i.e. political discussions especially).

- comic_relief
 

orly

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I'm someone who would settle for the first remotely attractive girl who shows interest in me. So far that hasn't happened.

If you are even slightly successful with women, I can see the viewpoint that you wouldn't want to be tied down to one girl. But if you are perpetually unsuccessful like me, it's a different story.

My sole purpose in wanting to improve my "game", so to speak, is to get that one girl, lock her down in marriage, and never, ever, ever, ever think about having to go through the utter torture - yes, torture - of trying to attract another girl.

I'll do what I can pick a girl who would stay through thick and thin, and if for whatever reason she dies before I do, that's still it for me - no more other women until I too die.
 

comic_relief

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orly said:
I'm someone who would settle for the first remotely attractive girl who shows interest in me. So far that hasn't happened.

If you are even slightly successful with women, I can see the viewpoint that you wouldn't want to be tied down to one girl. But if you are perpetually unsuccessful like me, it's a different story.

My sole purpose in wanting to improve my "game", so to speak, is to get that one girl, lock her down in marriage, and never, ever, ever, ever think about having to go through the utter torture - yes, torture - of trying to attract another girl.

I'll do what I can pick a girl who would stay through thick and thin, and if for whatever reason she dies before I do, that's still it for me - no more other women until I too die.
Don't mean to be rude, but improve yourself and get a few girlfriends before making that argument :p I was the same way for a while, now I got more experience and have to find the CORRECT girl for me personality and compatibility wise :)

- comic_relief
 

orly

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comic_relief said:
Don't mean to be rude, but improve yourself and get a few girlfriends before making that argument :p I was the same way for a while, now I got more experience and have to find the CORRECT girl for me personality and compatibility wise :)

- comic_relief
I joined this site 3 years go. I've changed a lot, and improved for the better (if I might say so myself). However I was a dateless virgin back then and I'm still a dateless virgin today.

I think in my first post I mentioned something about trying to get a girlfriend by the end of the year (2008). Someone suggested I should be confident about getting a girlfriend by the end of the month. Well, three years later, not only have I still never had my first girlfriend yet, I've yet to go on my first date.
 

Darth

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3 things I got out of this site:

1. Be a man
2. Have some self-respect
3. Don't get hung up on one girl until you know she is hung up on you

Also, feminism sucks.

My rules:

1. It's not about sex
2. It's about God
3. Develop some personal honesty; it'll take you farther than you think

Also, texting sucks;)

Beyond that, it's up to you to live a good life. Don't let strangers on some forum tell you what you should be doing, or what is and isn't moral. There's something wrong with that.

It may not be near, but someday you will wake up and ask yourself, "What the hell have I been doing with my life?"

Why have I been twisting my personality into a pretzel to get a bunch of cheap women who don't even care about me, or me for them? Why wasn't I becoming successful, becoming a better man, finding a really good girl (quality over quantity), maybe even getting married (GASP). Except that if I ever did meet a great girl, I wouldn't be able to keep her because I have BRAINWASHED myself into not caring for anyone.

But whatever. I'm not going to force my life down your throats. Just remember that there are other ways to live and you need to be your own man, rather than letting other people tell you how things are or should be.

Happy Holy Week and Happy Easter.
 

satelliteparties

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Some guys are inherently screwed and simply aren't liked by a majority of women.

This whole "spinning plates" thing is good in theory to avoid getting attached to a girl unless she gets attached to you first, but some of us don't really have options...and even when we put our "best foot forward" while better than before, still isn't good enough...at least to get the women we want.

My problem isn't finding a girl that likes me...there are cute, low-maintenance nerdy girls out there and it's just a matter of finding them...it's that I have an urge to meet/attract/sleep with as many women that are sexually attractive to me as possible. I have a little adventurer in me like a lot of guys on this site...and the idea of already getting the girl and not attracting/sleeping with another one bores me...at least at the beginning stages of a relationship.

I really wish this wasn't the case...I'm very lucky that at least I can attract a woman cute by my standards occasionally and she'll like me for me...but I guess biological urges and years of looking at porn make it so I'm always thinking about "the next one."
 

Falcon25

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Darth said:
3 things I got out of this site:

1. Be a man
2. Have some self-respect
3. Don't get hung up on one girl until you know she is hung up on you

Also, feminism sucks.

My rules:

1. It's not about sex
2. It's about God
3. Develop some personal honesty; it'll take you farther than you think

Also, texting sucks;)

Beyond that, it's up to you to live a good life. Don't let strangers on some forum tell you what you should be doing, or what is and isn't moral. There's something wrong with that.

It may not be near, but someday you will wake up and ask yourself, "What the hell have I been doing with my life?"

Why have I been twisting my personality into a pretzel to get a bunch of cheap women who don't even care about me, or me for them? Why wasn't I becoming successful, becoming a better man, finding a really good girl (quality over quantity), maybe even getting married (GASP). Except that if I ever did meet a great girl, I wouldn't be able to keep her because I have BRAINWASHED myself into not caring for anyone.

But whatever. I'm not going to force my life down your throats. Just remember that there are other ways to live and you need to be your own man, rather than letting other people tell you how things are or should be.

Happy Holy Week and Happy Easter.
For a 20 yr old, this is a great post. Even though this kid is a religious freak, he has his shivt together. I like his post.
 

thechallenger

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Wtf

I can honestly say that i think we as guys are just shooting ourselves in the foot
caring about this type of crap. IF IT UPSETS YOU, IT HAS POWER OVER YOU.
go beyond it, rise above it, only then will you be beyond it
 

sstype

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thechallenger said:
I can honestly say that i think we as guys are just shooting ourselves in the foot
caring about this type of crap. IF IT UPSETS YOU, IT HAS POWER OVER YOU.
go beyond it, rise above it, only then will you be beyond it
Youre absolutely right. I'm taking the first steps to true indifference. We have to move beyond "spinning plates" as a cure-all. All that does is replaces oneitis with "manyitis"

We need to learn to be happy having no plates or prospects. Life is more than how much "game" you can spit. Do something that actually benefits society, your friends and family, the less fortunate, etc.

We're capable of so much more than devoting our lives to impressing stupid hoes.
 

comic_relief

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orly said:
I joined this site 3 years go. I've changed a lot, and improved for the better (if I might say so myself). However I was a dateless virgin back then and I'm still a dateless virgin today.

I think in my first post I mentioned something about trying to get a girlfriend by the end of the year (2008). Someone suggested I should be confident about getting a girlfriend by the end of the month. Well, three years later, not only have I still never had my first girlfriend yet, I've yet to go on my first date.
I apologize if I made that comment, it took me years of working on myself and quelling my inner demons before I got a girlfriend or even someone to sleep with for that matter.

What kind of hobbies do you have?
What do you do for fun?
Do you do anything interesting?
Do you have your sh!t together?
Do you still approach?
What group of friends do you have?
How is your self-esteem?
Are you trying too hard?

sstype said:
Youre absolutely right. I'm taking the first steps to true indifference. We have to move beyond "spinning plates" as a cure-all. All that does is replaces oneitis with "manyitis"

We need to learn to be happy having no plates or prospects. Life is more than how much "game" you can spit. Do something that actually benefits society, your friends and family, the less fortunate, etc.

We're capable of so much more than devoting our lives to impressing stupid hoes.
Couldn't agree more, how about the fact that different strokes for different folks? each person deals with grief and loneliness in different ways. The way that I deal with being single was to go head long into self-improvement and doing charity work until things turn around. Another person might actually just go sleep with 10 different people. Different ways to deal with the same issue.

Great post

- comic_relief
 

orly

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comic_relief said:
I apologize if I made that comment, it took me years of working on myself and quelling my inner demons before I got a girlfriend or even someone to sleep with for that matter.

What kind of hobbies do you have?
What do you do for fun?
Do you do anything interesting?
Do you have your sh!t together?
Do you still approach?
What group of friends do you have?
How is your self-esteem?
Are you trying too hard?

- comic_relief


I am reasonably fit, working out to be better ("jacked", so to speak). I have a good job, make good but not awesome money. Have my own place, good but not awesome car from a lux brand. Plenty of friends, including women (albeit not that many) from various walks of life ranging from the super-nerdy to players I see with a different girl every week.

I actually think I'm pretty awesome aside from the fact that I've got a proven track record of being totally unable to attract a girl. No, I'm not perfect, and I don't think -every- girl would be attracted to me, but it boggles my mind that I've had zero - that's an absolute zero - luck with women.

My hangups? I'm short - definitely the shortest or one of the shortest male in any of my social circles at 5'6". I've tried to not to let it bother me, but increasingly I am coming to the conclusion that height for a man really is in fact A Very Big Deal.

Also I think I'm starting to see some hair loss in my hair line. It's barely noticeable now, but I see it as a ticking timebomb. And no, I will not shave my head - I look horrible with a shaved head. Rather I'll put aside some funds to get a transplant if it ever gets down to that necessity.

I enjoy computer games, programming, studying/reading up on financial subjects. I also ride motorcycles, taking drives, mountain biking. I spend a fair amount of time at the gym with weights and running, although I can't say it's a "hobby" since I absolutely hate excercising, but I do it solely to improve my physique to hopefully become more attractive to women.

No, I do not cold/semi-cold approach anymore. I have not since late 2010. I have reached the conclusion it simply does not work for me, and contrary to becoming numb to rejection, each one became even more soul-crushing. I am also getting pretty old for the club/bar/party scene so I do not partake in that anymore either.
 

Veridin

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For the hair loss, I can recommend Rogaine, it really works.

Almost half of all men have that problem, and while Rogaine doesn't work for everyone, it works for most. I only use it once a day, not twice a day, and it still works. Still a bit thin hair, but I'm not losing it like I once did.
 

Xanthus

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I understand what Sstype is going through and Espi hit the nail on the head about never losing the desire to mate with women. I find myself in the same state asking too many questions about why this isn't working out or how she liked me before, but then she changed not long after.

One time I talked to this older fellow that I wasn't doing so hot with the ladies and joked about going the escort route. He told me that I should only think of something like that once I hit my sixties and that there's women everywhere you look, so the possibilities of getting someone are there.

I'm still stuck in the 'questions' mode and have brought myself down for years thinking I couldn't get a woman. I've read a lot of good posts here in the past and have realized that there were ladies interested in me throughout my life.

You should read up more on IOI's and look back to see if/when there were any ladies that showed them to you in the past. That should help you with looking for them again.

Don't drop out. You just got to think better of yourself. I'm working on that myself as well.

Xanthus
 

disgustipated

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I'm kinda proud of myself, I'm rebounding quicker from rejection and learning not to disect myself so much...more likely to disect the rejecting girl but not too much.

Went on a meet up with a Fish girl the other night. Met at a bar/restaurant. When I get there she has 2 drinks from another guy already. The guy was polite enough to offer me his seat so sh$t didn't get too awkward. I thought great she's 2 drinks into this already and he paid for it, sweet. Well we had great conversation I thought in general, I did some very light kino when appropriate but she didn't reciprocate. AND she didn't get any more drinks...that should've been a sign to bail before she had a chance. Also, she was on her damn phone a ton, texting mostly. Well, about an hour into it she comes up with a really LAME excuse on why she had to leave(or extremely legit, I'm banking on fake) but also had the nerve to tell me to call her this weekend to do something. I give her a "yeah right" smirk. She asks if I didn't believe her, and I said sure but it doesn't matter.

Anyway, I was bummed I couldn't escalate stuff with her and put things in a sexual frame...I'm lacking there. But in the past I would sulk for a damned week over this and cancel any plans I had. Now it's Friday and I"m already over it and ready to try again. I actually enjoyed myself for the little time I was out even though she felt it necessary to lie, **** it. She missed out on an awesome lay.

Can totally relate though to OP. Sometimes it's a lot to be putting up with from these women who have an over inflated idea of how much their pu$$y is worth. I no longer jump through hoops to get with someone, just not gonna do it. They'd LOVE to have you do it though!
 

Gambit

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Dude, you don't need to chase women. If you work On yourself and build yourself up: financialy, emotionally and physically- the *****es are going to chase after you :cool:
 

typical

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Chase Life and Life will give you everything you desire.

Chase a specific desire and it will take everything away from your Life.
 

Forty0ztoFreedom

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I say good for you OP. I'm in a similar mindset, and feel a confidence boost without this sh!t in my head. Its gotten to the point where I enjoy turning down party invites and stuff like that . . not just because I'm a pr!ck, just because I know I don't need it anymore. It feels good to not be dragged around by some elusive dream. I'm beginning to realize how beta I was, even at times where I was doing all the 'alpha' tricks and cold-approaching sets of 10 girls.
 

Tyson420

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I remember when I was young a person asked me which would I'd rather have?

A hot chick or a really nice car?

Guess what I chose? I was like 18 when I decided I just wanted a car, I really want to go back to that mentality. I'm tired of skirt chasing and it's been like 3 years of trying to get *****. I blame the PUA bull****, this kind of mentality if you don't lots of girls. You're nothing. It's ironic that I was more mature about life when I was just an 18 year old kid.
 
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