is it possible some girls only want sex from the relationship

[iliketennis]

girl lives with her boyfriend. they broke up for a few months, we dated.

we broke up and now she's back with him, but she still wants to see me. still wants sex, and is hiding everything from him.

she seems to want to stay with him.. i told her she shouldn't re-sign the lease with him and she did anyway. yesterday she bought me a bunch of stuff for my birthday.

why does she want to keep seeing me while she has a boyfriend she lives with? how should i play this?

 

[Iceberg]

I'm no saint...so if I were in your shoes, I'd probably continue banging her like the s1ut she is. But advice-wise, I'd say she seems like a terrible human being and you should distance yourself from her immediately.

She's cheating on her man. So now you know that YOU can't ever trust her in a relationship. And god only knows if her man if F-ing around on her, bringing all sorts of skanky diseases into the picture. Seems like the perfect storm of STDs and emotional baggage.

Oh. And yes...some girls only want sex from relationships.

 

[UniKKatiL]

Have sex with her if you want to, I mean why not? It will only get you good practice. But don't get into a relationship with her as you know you can't trust her.. Just treat her like a slut since she is one and date other girls at the same time.. When you find a girl, ditch her. What comes around goes around or was it What goes around comes around?

I know it might be cold hearted but that's what I would of done, if you don't
want to take this advice then take my 2nd:

FORGET HER AND MOVE ON!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[bukowski_merit]

girl lives with her boyfriend. they broke up for a few months, we dated.

I've been here a million times.

we broke up and now she's back with him, but she still wants to see me. still wants sex, and is hiding everything from him.

Who broke up with who? I'm assuming she chose to go back with him?

she seems to want to stay with him.. i told her she shouldn't re-sign the lease with him and she did anyway. yesterday she bought me a bunch of stuff for my birthday.

I'm going to guess that he is more stable in life than you are??? Perhaps has more money and a better job?

From my experience in these situations - the situation was always simple: I provided her with great sex, fun, and a chance to escape responsibility of being an adult. The other guy would always provide her with shelter, money, and overall be stability (yet - in most cases he couldn't provide her with good sex, fun or an escape).

See: Lover vs. provider roles....

why does she want to keep seeing me while she has a boyfriend she lives with? how should i play this?

Because you're more fun to be around. She does not want to take a chance with an unknown (you).

If you want her to be exclusive to you - go no contact with her. If she's high sex drive - this will make her go crazy! And you can expect her to show up unannounced at your doorstep. Then explain to her that you're having fun with your life and want something more serious with someone.... balls in her court then...


If you are fine with just having sex - just be careful. I've been in more than one fight in situations like this. Always remember that women like this are crazy..

 

[iliketennis]

Who broke up with who? I'm assuming she chose to go back with him?

I'm going to guess that he is more stable in life than you are??? Perhaps has more money and a better job?

she broke up with me, yeah

they've been together 3 years... he is about to graduate.

i'm about to graduate from law school and i currently run my own small company.

 

[hydroheathen]

Well if you want a relationship out of it and she is not there as well then move on. If your happy just pounding her while she has a boyfriend go for it. Nothing wrong with that I don't think.

 

[bukowski_merit]

she broke up with me, yeah

they've been together 3 years... he is about to graduate.

i'm about to graduate from law school and i currently run my own small company.

Ok. Well, i can only assume that 1 of 2 things is happening here:

1) She doesn't see you as a provider type. Aka: You are too alpha. And so she only sees you as a sexual object/lover. A lot of women will not maintain a relationship with a guy who they can't bend (break); it's too dangerous to their femininity and ego. This guy she goes home too is already broken in and obeying her commands.

or on the flip side of that:

2) This guy is an @sshole to her and she is used to being treated that way (she would have a history of this if so). In this case - you probably didn't fulfill her need to be treated like $hit. You were too nice. Or in the very least unable to lead her emotionally.


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It's hard to say for sure without knowing the full story though.

 

[iliketennis]

Ok. Well, i can only assume that 1 of 2 things is happening here:

1) She doesn't see you as a provider type. Aka: You are too alpha. And so she only sees you as a sexual object/lover. A lot of women will not maintain a relationship with a guy who they can't bend (break); it's too dangerous to their femininity and ego. This guy she goes home too is already broken in and obeying her commands.

or on the flip side of that:

2) This guy is an @sshole to her and she is used to being treated that way (she would have a history of this if so). In this case - you probably didn't fulfill her need to be treated like $hit. You were too nice. Or in the very least unable to lead her emotionally.


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It's hard to say for sure without knowing the full story though.

she absolutely wears the pants in her relationship now. he knew about us banging and did nothing... she gets what she wants always.

what you said made me feel a lot better. if she doesn't want to be with me because i can't be broken easily then so much the better