How to be a successful man

ELMER_GANTRY

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Success is measued by a level of social status or the vast achievement of an objective or a goal. Many men believe that being a success, is only designated to one particular area in life. But in reality, the key to being a successful man is measured in every area of your life. Only having success in one specific area, does not make you a true successful man. Being successful with your career, social status, women, family, friends, money, yourself, and what makes you happy is what being a succesful man is all about. Happiness should be number one, because when you're happy, you achieved success, and you can enjoy life, when you enjoy life, that is a definite success no matter who you are.

Some men have success in obtaining women, but lose them rather quickly when the relationship falls a part because they don't know how to hang on to them. Another guy could be brilliant at his work, but doesn't have the personality or communicative skills to achieve his full success. While others could have a girlfriend and the perfect job, and still could be miserable. That doesn't sound very successful does it? It is what you do, how you think, how you act, how hard you work, and where you put yourself, is the key to being a successful man.

The first and most important part of being a success, is focusing on yourself first. In order to achieve anything worthwile, you have to put yourself above others. Now, some people might say this is selfish, but it is the only way to go. Nobody can do it for you, you have to be able to put yourself above the top so you can focus on what you need to do to accomplish your goals to be a success. If you're always worried about what other people think about you, trying too hard to please others, afraid of hurting someone's feelings, afraid to do what you want to do, you will never be a success and will always fall behind in life trailing behind other people. Think about it... Think about the last time you were afraid to hurt somebody else's feelings. You put them above you, didn't you? You were trying to be a nice guy afraid to rock the boat or trying to be way too considerate. So you put them above you, and when it came time for that other person, the one who you were afraid to hurt their feelings, to do the same for you, what happened? They put themselves above you and you wound up with the hurt feelings. You were afraid to to put yourself first, and in the end, they put themselves above you. That is what successful people do.

Men do this all the time with women, they are afraid of what they think about them, so they alter their thinking in their mind, and wind up placing the chick above them, which is a recipe for disaster. The chick has the higher value and the guy is a half a mile behind the starting gate, trying to catch up. The chick sees that he has the lower value and sees no interest in him. That's all because the guy did it to himself, with how he was acting, and what he was thinking about himself, which was displaying lower value being insecure. So, never give the chick the higher value or worry about what she thinks of you. When you display higher value, not acting insecure, not worrying about what she thinks about you, and making her qualify herself to you, you will have lots of success with women.

The true key to being a successful man is being happy, that is correct. If you're not happy and enjoying life, you're not much of a success. You have failed in that area, and all the achievements you have accomplished have gone to waste. You don't have to be a rich CEO with the most beautiful women to be a success. As long as you have a good job, have some social status, doing well. and are happy with what you do, that is being a success because you have achieved what you intended to accomplish in each area of your life.

Working hard at whatever you plan to become in life, is what you should be focusing on, and not let anybody distract you, or allow you not to obtain that goal. You need to put yourself first, so you can start to achieve your desired goal whatever it may be. If women, friends, family, poor mental thinking, try to get in the way, don't let them or it do that, this is your life, your goals, you should enter with a clear mind and put yourself first to achieve them , because if you don't, you never will, Don't think for a minute that somebody else would do the same for you, they want to be successful too, and they wouldn't let you stand in the way either, so don't let them.

Another factor in being successful, is your mind and how you think. That is the main reason why guys either make it or they fail. Positive, ambitious, optimistic men always come out ahead and obtain what they want. When you start thinking negative, feeling nervous, doubting yourself, you are doomed for failure in every area of life. You can't fully become that man of greatness with all those mental blocks full of negativity or insecurity. To be a winner, you need to break out of that pessimistic mold, take charge, and be in control of your desired goals because nobody can do them for you. They might be able to help you, but they cant do it for you, that is your job. That is why you need to focus with a positive mind and get a strong inner game. Not only wiil that help you with women, but it will help you in your career, you goals, and will improve you as a man. Without having that first, you won't become much of a success with anything, because you are holding yourself back.

So, by focusing on yourself first, being happy with your life, obtaining your goals with nobody holding you back, working hard at what you want to become, thinking positive and being ambitious , not reinforcing negative thoughts in your mind, being in control and in charge of your life, not worrying about what others think about you, indeed you will achieve success, and most likely in all areas of your life.

Remember guys, women will come and go throughout your life, they can always be replaced. But it is you that should always focus on being successful in every aspect of your life, because being happy and putting yourself first is what makes you a definite success and what your life should be all about.
 

Doctrine Dark

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Another magnificent post, Elmer. I don't focus on myself enough. I'm always worried about someone judging me for a variety things--and that keeps me in my disgusting cycle. I think getting past this is my first step, and I don't know why I'm having trouble doing this.

Regardless, I'm not about to bring down your topic with my whining. Thanks for posting this.
 

Fred_Scuttle

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Bravo. Couldn't agree with you more Elmer. Never let a woman tarnish your dreams either. They will do that to you if you let them. Be your own man, stand your own ground, take your place in this world. Stand Tall. 100th post
 

Mr. Fantastic

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Hello Again

Mr. Fantastic: "Hello again Mr. Gantry. Once again Great Post!"

ELMER GANTRY: "Oh so it is Mr. NotsoFantastic again. What do you want? Can't you just stay away from my posts?"

Mr. Fantastic: "Don't worry Mr. Gantry this is no flame. (I still don't see how my other response was a flame...) I won't hurt your fragile ego, but since you seem to be the only one posting threads with hints of genius, I figure I should offer my opinion, feel free to agree/ disagree. They are just "words" don't take them so seriously..."

ELMER_GANTRY said:
Success is measured by a level of social status or the vast achievement of an objective or a goal.
Success is measured by the individual. Who am I or you to tell anyone that they are a success or failure? The individual will have to answer to their own melancholy one day. That is what measures success or failure. If the individual isn't satisfied then they have failed.

ELMER_GANTRY said:
the key to being a successful man is measured in every area of your life. Only having success in one specific area, does not make you a true successful man. Being successful with your career, social status, women, family, friends, money, yourself, and what makes you happy is what being a succesful man is all about. Happiness should be number one, because when you're happy, you achieved success, and you can enjoy life, when you enjoy life, that is a definite success no matter who you are.
Hehe once again who is anyone to tell you whether or not you are a success or failure? You define your life, not me, not this website, only you.

ELMER_GANTRY said:
Some men have success in obtaining women, but lose them rather quickly when the relationship falls a part because they don't know how to hang on to them. Another guy could be brilliant at his work, but doesn't have the personality or communicative skills to achieve his full success. While others could have a girlfriend and the perfect job, and still could be miserable. That doesn't sound very successful does it? It is what you do, how you think, how you act, how hard you work, and where you put yourself, is the key to being a successful man.
Maybe all my responses should just be "You define your own success".

ELMER GANTRY: "That doesn't sound very successful does it?"

Mr. Fantastic: "Why do you care about what SOUNDS 'successful'? Shouldn't you care more about what you consider to be success? To a wasteful spender success can be saving a few dollars. To a scrawny man gaining a few pounds is considered success. Why live to other peoples standards when you can create your own?"

ELMER_GANTRY said:
"The first and most important part of being a success, is focusing on yourself first. In order to achieve anything worthwile, you have to put yourself above others. Now, some people might say this is selfish, but it is the only way to go."
This is not selfishness. Selfishness is using others to your own benefit. Using others is the vice, not putting the focus on yourself. The opposite, giving yourself completely to others for their benefit, isn't a virtue. That is called being a doormat. Focus on yourself. Good point Mr. Gantry, please continue...

ELMER_GANTRY said:
That's all because the guy did it to himself, with how he was acting, and what he was thinking about himself, which was displaying lower value being insecure. So, never give the chick the higher value or worry about what she thinks of you. When you display higher value, not acting insecure, not worrying about what she thinks about you, and making her qualify herself to you, you will have lots of success with women.
Why worry about displaying value? When you put the focus on yourself, that is where you place your 'value'. Is that what you were trying to say?

ELMER_GANTRY said:
The true key to being a successful man is being happy, that is correct. If you're not happy and enjoying life, you're not much of a success. You have failed in that area, and all the achievements you have accomplished have gone to waste. You don't have to be a rich CEO with the most beautiful women to be a success. As long as you have a good job, have some social status, doing well. and are happy with what you do, that is being a success because you have achieved what you intended to accomplish in each area of your life.
All is vanity under the sun. Just something to consider...

ELMER_GANTRY said:
Remember guys, women will come and go throughout your life, they can always be replaced. But it is you that should always focus on being successful in every aspect of your life, because being happy and putting yourself first is what makes you a definite success and what your life should be all about.
Alas! Mr. Gantry has discovered the secret of life! Wait... I've seen people put themselves first but yet be unhappy. Do you mean to put the focus on yourself? There is a difference. Putting yourself first is grabbing the only life preserver on a sinking boat while letting everyone else drown. Putting the focus on yourself is handing that preserver to a kid knowing that if you drown you have lived a worthy life in your eyes. Maybe that is what you meant?
 

Fred_Scuttle

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The above poster sounds like a big goof ball to me. He was talking about an individual. Who else could it be? The rest makes no sense what he is talking about. The guy doesn't even understand the concept of what he was trying to say. Took a superb post and put his own spin on it. Too bad this guy can't write a great post like that. Great post Elmer you just have to shake your head at this fellow.
 

Angelo

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This guy reminds me of Pook's posts... The difference is that Pook's posts were a bit more well presented.
 

Fred_Scuttle

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The more successful you are the more women you will attract. Stay in school get your degrees then you will get there someday with a good paying job when they hire you.
 

itiswhatitis239

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Great post i also agree i like this statement:
Remember guys, women will come and go throughout your life, they can always be replaced. But it is you that should always focus on being successful in every aspect of your life,
 
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