her birthday is on friday

[lostinnightmares]

Hey guys, I'm new here. I read around to see if anybody has posted a similar perdicament but I see nothing similar enough.

I'm 21 , stopped being an AFC this year. So I finally started talking to girls again and there is one girl who I started to form a connection with a girl I met working for Greenpeace. It seems like she grew up really sheltred like I was. She doesnt have the social skills of someone our age, it's cute and I guess it works in my favor since it makes it so easy for us to get a long. I'm always in control, guiding the conversation. It feels so good to be a man when im with her, and I can tell she likes it too. We never talk about problems or stupid **** that gets a guy friend zoned; our time together has always been so high energy and it feels good both ways. I'm really lucky about the job because encounters ends up being a very fun date enviorment without it being a date! Sucks that it's over for now.

I didn't notice but I must have initiated kino without even noticing it, so she started kinoing me back big time and is really flirty. The problem is that she has a boyfriend. Shes only mentioned it in passing twice and I ignored it like a player. Anyway we saw each other at a venue and I escalated kino all the way up to kiss closing, but she had to go and I don't want her to feel guilty, to avoid anchoring bad feelings towards me.

Her Birthday is this Friday. She wants to have a party this weekend and I would go but I don't want to meet her bf or anything. I was thinking of calling her. My idiot lady friend suggested that I give her a gift and not go to her birthday. That sounded like a good idea. I guess I ended up unintentionally LJFB'd said friend, so now shes jealous and not talking, so I can't go to her for advice. Anyway what do you guys think. Should I show up to her party and give her a gift. Her BF might be there. I havent even kissed this girl but I'm already gifting her something, yeah I know it's her birthday but still.

Here are some things I was considering. Could I do some of these, and in what order?

- Running a PUA BF destroyer
- Go to her party, risk meeting her BF, risk getting LJBF
- Ask her out to give her the birthday gift, more comfort, more kino and kiss close

Oh and I know this isn't a PUA forum. I'm not really into that ****, but I guess I adopted their terminology.

 

[Iceberg]

No you should not give her a gift. And you probably shouldn't attend her party either. If she's your target, then you should only meet her in situations that can lead to your goals. A birthday party with her boyfriend attending isn't that. Take her to a bar some other time and buy her drinks. One on one.

And yeah, you really did absorb a lot of PUA terminology. All that talk about "I'm always guiding conversation. It feels to good to be the man around her." and "She mentioned her boyfriend. I ignored it like a player." Hah...I was like, wait a minute...this guy still hasn't banged this girl, right? Lose the "player" talk and save it for when something is happening. Right now it just makes you look like you've been reading too many PUA books.

 

[Maximus Rex]

I didn't notice but I must have initiated kino without even noticing it, so she started kinoing me back big time and is really flirty. The problem is that she has a boyfriend..

This isn't a problem: Pay close attention to the bolded and decide on if it's applicable to your situation.

The following come from "The Mystery Method," By Mystery page 36


Nine times out of ten, when a woman says, " I have a boyfriend," what this translates to is, "You just telegraphed too much interest."

It has nothing to do with whether she actually has a boyfriend. In fact if she is attracted to you, she will often deliberately hide the boyfriend from you until after you have had sex with her.

Whether she mentions him or not in no way proves that he actually exists-only that she had a motive to mention him.

1) Though she doesn't have a boyfriend, she's not attracted to you or you miscalibrated your escalation.

2) She DOES have a boyfriend and, given her current options, she has chosen to stick with that relationship.

3) She DOES have a boyfriend and is willing to sleep with you but wants to make sure that you understand her situation first. She wants DISCRETION and understanding. And though she might be available to you for sex, she NOT immediately available for more of a commitment.

4) She DOES have a boyfriend and she IS willing to cheat on him (they often are if your game is tight,) but she doesn't want to feel guilty about it. This is her RATIONALIZATION process at work. As long as she mentions the boyfriend BEFORE sleeping with you, she can rationalize to herself that it was YOUR FAULT. Sure, she might regret it later, but that won't necessarily stop her from cheating.

5) She DOESN'T have a boyfriend and she IS attracted to you; she just doesn't want to look like a loser who can't get a man. Most hot women have orbiters anyway: nice guys who pose as their friends but secretly want to sleep with them. Since the word "boyfriend," can have so many different meanings, she is thinking of one of her orbitors as a "place keeper."

THE BOTTOM LINE IS, DON'T ASK ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND AND DON'T APPEAR FAZED IF SHE MENTIONS HIM. HE MAY NOT EVEN EXIST. JUST TAKE AS AN INSTANCE OF LACK OF INTEREST CAUSED BY YOU TELEGRAPHING TOO MUCH INTEREST FAR TOO SOON.

Shes only mentioned it in passing twice and I ignored it like a player. Anyway we saw each other at a venue and I escalated kino all the way up to kiss closing, but she had to go and I don't want her to feel guilty, to avoid anchoring bad feelings towards me.

Yeeeayyyy!!!!! I want to be like when I gradulate from DJ Boot Camp.

She wants to have a party this weekend and I would go but I don't want to meet her bf or anything.

Don't meet him then.

I was thinking of calling her.

Call either the day before, or the day of to see if she will mention it to you and invite. You, HOWEVER ARE NOT TO MAKE ANY MENTION OF HER BIRTHDAY!!!! To mention her birthday, shows too much interest on her part. If she does invite you, say you have a date, and you'll try to pass through.

My idiot lady friend suggested that I give her a gift and not go to her birthday. That sounded like a good idea.

Explain to me why giving gifts to women that have boyfriends is a good idea. Is is very AFC. Remember you have to be different. The average dude on the street that is in your position would bring her a gift. Plus you're trying to f*ck this girl. Her boyfriend would wonder why some random dude is bringing his girl gifts. You don't want to be on his radar.

I guess I ended up unintentionally LJFB'd said friend, so now shes jealous and not talking, so I can't go to her for advice.

Go to her for advice. Unless you've intimated in someway that y'all are in a relationship, she has no right to get mad. Explain to her that you're "friends," and you value her advice. Tell her if the roles were reversed, that you'd be more than happy to give her advice. Then try to f*ck her too.

Anyway what do you guys think. Should I show up to her party and give her a gift. Her BF might be there. I havent even kissed this girl but I'm already gifting her something, yeah I know it's her birthday but still.

Yes, you should go to the party. No you shouldn't bring a gift. I think you should go to the party with your "idiot friend," and some of her female friends. It will telegraph to your target that you've been "pre-selected," by
the other women. Women are attracted to men that have women around them.

While at the party, pratice your social skills. Work the room, talk to the guys and try to game the other chicks. I suggest before you go the party, you take a look at "The Mystery Method." Being that her boyfriend is going to be there, only stay for about on hour, then kick it with your "idiot friend," at other venue. Practice trying to bounce chicks from one location to another. Try to get on your target's attendee to leave with you.

Here are some things I was considering. Could I do some of these, and in what order?

- Running a PUA BF destroyer
- Go to her party, risk meeting her BF, risk getting LJBF

Try those things on the other targets at the party. From what you have said, I don't your skill level is at the point where you can go to this party, and knock this dude for his girlfriend while he's there.

- Ask her out to give her the birthday gift,

You seem hell bent on giving somebody a gift. Why not take the money you were going to spend on your target, and get your mama, granny, sister, niece, or aunty a gift. They'll appreciate it a hellva lot more. Only give gifts to women you've been in LTRs with for over a year.

more comfort, more kino and kiss close

Do this when you have isolated and away from her bf.

Oh and I know this isn't a PUA forum. I'm not really into that ****, but I guess I adopted their terminology.

I sometimes get that feeling to by the posts I read. Seriously though, this used to be a great PUA forum, but the quality of a lot of the questions on here causes one to think is this site about self improvement and getting chicks, or is it about AFC's and their asinine relationship questions.

 

[lostinnightmares]

No you should not give her a gift. And you probably shouldn't attend her party either. If she's your target, then you should only meet her in situations that can lead to your goals. A birthday party with her boyfriend attending isn't that. Take her to a bar some other time and buy her drinks. One on one.

And yeah, you really did absorb a lot of PUA terminology. All that talk about "I'm always guiding conversation. It feels to good to be the man around her." and "She mentioned her boyfriend. I ignored it like a player." Hah...I was like, wait a minute...this guy still hasn't banged this girl, right? Lose the "player" talk and save it for when something is happening. Right now it just makes you look like you've been reading too many PUA books.

Ok, thanks man. Now that I think about it, maybe my friend was just projecting what she wishes someone would do for her. You can't trust anyone for advice these days. I guess it's good though since I have to do **** on my own. Didn't mean too sound to ahead of myself but yeah I don't have much field experience with women and read too much internet ****

This isn't a problem: Pay close attention to the bolded and decide on if it's applicable to your situation.

Call either the day before, or the day of to see if she will mention it to you and invite. You, HOWEVER ARE NOT TO MAKE ANY MENTION OF HER BIRTHDAY!!!! To mention her birthday, shows too much interest on her part. If she does invite you, say you have a date, and you'll try to pass through.


Go to her for advice. Unless you've intimated in someway that y'all are in a relationship, she has no right to get mad. Explain to her that you're "friends," and you value her advice. Tell her if the roles were reversed, that you'd be more than happy to give her advice. Then try to f*ck her too.

Yes, you should go to the party. No you shouldn't bring a gift. I think you should go to the party with your "idiot friend," and some of her female friends. It will telegraph to your target that you've been "pre-selected," by
the other women. Women are attracted to men that have women around them.

While at the party, pratice your social skills. Work the room, talk to the guys and try to game the other chicks. I suggest before you go the party, you take a look at "The Mystery Method." Being that her boyfriend is going to be there, only stay for about on hour, then kick it with your "idiot friend," at other venue. Practice trying to bounce chicks from one location to another. Try to get on your target's attendee to leave with you.


You seem hell bent on giving somebody a gift. Why not take the money you were going to spend on your target, and get your mama, granny, sister, niece, or aunty a gift. They'll appreciate it a hellva lot more. Only give gifts to women you've been in LTRs with for over a year.
.

She invited me like two weeks ago, a week before I saw her at ther venue. I told her that I might go and if not we could totally meet and I could make up for it, she was cool with that, that was kind of a weird AFC thing to do but she was into it. Oh and my idiot friend texted me telling me she wants to **** the day I meet up with my target, but she is insane so its like uh, so she kind of an unexpected option out of nowhere. Also my idiot friend is hotter than the girl I like so I don't know about bringing her to her party. The girl I like is kind of a geek so I don't know if the party will be lame.

That's kind of the reason I listed those three option. Plus I already got a gift on the advice of my idiot friend . it's not very expensive or desperate or anything, just a little necklace. Plus I just want to make a move asap because I'm too methodical and cautious with my game since i'm fresh, and wish to be more bold.

So I shouldn't call her for her birthday? We are friends on facebook, she knows I check it, she knows I know. I don't want to be supplicant but I don't want to be a douche either.

 

[scorpio1138]

shouldn't have bought the gift. Rewards are given later on after you've "had" some.

This could become a oneitus quickly.

Don't go to the party. See how long until she contacts you. She probably will.

Pursue other women.

 

[Maximus Rex]

Ok, thanks man. Now that I think about it, maybe my friend was just projecting what she wishes someone would do for her.

She was. I forgot to add never take advice from a woman pertaining to relationships. They give advice based on "how things should be," not on "how things actually are". The only reason why you ask for there advice is to do a compare and contrast on differences between male and female advice.

Also my idiot friend is hotter than the girl I like so I don't know about bringing her to her party.

Even more of a reason to make an appearence. If you show up with a hotter chick, it will show your target the caliber of woman that you bless with your presence. Hot chicks open new sets and establishes good precedents.

The girl I like is kind of a geek so I don't know if the party will be lame.

Again, your not staying for the duration, you're only going to be there for about an hour, then bounce. Preferably with on of the target's friends.

That's kind of the reason I listed those three option. Plus I already got a gift on the advice of my idiot friend . it's not very expensive or desperate or anything, just a little necklace.

Dude, I'm not going to tell you this again. DO NOT GIVE WOMEN GIFTS, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO HOLLA AT THEM! Nothing good can come from you giving strangers gifts. Giving her a gift isn't going to bring you closer to getting the p*ssy. As a matter of fact, it will put you further away and lower your value.

Plus I just want to make a move asap because I'm too methodical and cautious with my game since i'm fresh, and wish to be more bold.

Do it then. Be more bold, try new things. Be willing to crash and burn. You only get better from experience. The 10 you'll bang is the sum results of all of your failures and corrections in game. It's better to try and fail as oppose not trying at all.

So I shouldn't call her for her birthday

Again, calling her telegraphs too much interest on your part. Member this chick does have a boyfriend. You want to become a "hovercraft." Besides, you a happening guy doing things. You're in Greenpeace, you have a jealous hot "idiot friend," and I'm assuming your in school which means, midterms are coming up. You're putting to much emphasis on this chick (with a boyfriend,)
The minute she feels as if you're focusing too much attention on her, is the minute you'll lose her. I tell you that from experience.

We are friends on facebook, she knows I check it, she knows I know. I don't want to be supplicant but I don't want to be a douche either.

When did being a "douche," ever prevent a dude from getting laid. You're not her man, it's not your job to extend this chick birthday greetings.

I expect you to report back after the party. Give a detailed account with pictures. You can use the pictures ala Mystery's "picture gambit," routine. I especially what to see a picture of you, the target, and your "hot idiot friend." Please make sure you take a clear full body pic in good lighting conditions. Thank you and good luck.

 

[Maximus Rex]

Dude, what happend?

 

[lostinnightmares]

wasnt expecting such an overwhelming response. anyway she never mentioned a party after her birthday, might have been fluff talk, i dont know. went out the night before, #closed two new girls with idiot friend winging.

anyway, won't pursue target unless we end up working together again. kinda sucks because i kinda like her but if it's not in the cards; theres plenty of other fish. sorry to dissapoint, but at least now im more prepard for birthdays.

whats the picture gambit?

 

[Maximus Rex]

whats the picture gambit?

The picture gambit is when you you bust out photos of yourself (and other people) doing fun and exciting things. It's a combination rapport building and DHV building excercise. After you've shown the target, the pictures, you take some with the target in a funny pose, a serious pose, a romantic pose, if your game is good, you take a picture kissing.

#closed two new girls with idiot friend winging.

Don't be stingy with your love. We want detailed field reports. It's especially important because you illustrate the proper use of female friends.