bukowski_merit said:
So instead of screening for her past.
I pay attention to her sex drive. And her self-esteem.
Now we're looking at authentic self-esteem, not just how she presents herself. Example: If she can't accept a compliment. Or is always putting herself down. Or body language things like "can't make good eye contact" - these are signs she has low self-esteem. Watch for this. This is worse than high sex drive.
As far as high sex drive: Things to watch for: 1) If she can pretty much fvck all night; stays wet; keeps orgasming. 2) If she's always horny. < That's an indication of a woman with a high sex drive. Not that terrible if she has high self esteem (although she'll still be a firecracker), but if she's low self-esteem - undateable.
There was a common mantra on the relationship board of a woman you DO NOT want to make your girlfriend. Not only because they'll likely cheat on you, but also because they'll eventually bring h3ll to your life.
Just as a note: these women were normally raped or abused or had some kind of trauma early in their life.
I was going to add some of this to this thread but you beat me to it.
Yes, and I agree with everything you said except for the high sex drive and the abuse in most cases.
The low self esteem usually comes from the parents and siblings. Parents will put her down and favor the other child over her. That leads to resentment, low self esteem and her trying to prove herself to them. That will affect her at school, with friends, and being social. She will then try to prove herself to you because she will feel she isn't good enough for anybody. The trauma results from feeling not wanted in the family, accepted socially, and from previous boyfriends. But abuse can occur which leads to this problem.
I know chicks who can fvck all night and they are dateable. Self esteem is the one to watch out for because those chicks are constantly looking for reassurance. They will always question you wanting to know if you think they look good enough. They will always ask you how you feel about them. They still won't be satisfied when they get an answer and will still continue to think they aren't good enough. Low self esteem chicks will have sex whenever you want but they usually aren't horny all the time because of the low opinion of themselves.
Low self esteem and jealousy are the 2 most important factors to look at. Women who get jealous when other chicks look at you in public are chicks to avoid. She will get jealous of the other women looking at you, then that will lower her self esteem. She will feel that she isn't good enough and will have the idea that you're looking for something better. She will become depressed and take out her own insecurities out on you. She will think you don't care for her enough. Then she will start looking for other men and will blame you for her depression. She will think she wasn't happy because of you and think some other dude can make her happy. But another guy won't make her happy because it's her problems that gives her no self esteem and depression.
Also, chicks who are depressed and are never happy are ones to avoid. They kind of go through the motions but never really show their true feelings. Dysfunctional families are chicks to avoid. Also obsessive chicks who constantly want to know what you're doing. Obsessive chicks will be into you and then they become obsessed for another dude just as fast.
Friends are another one. If a chick doesn't have the ability to make friends and hold on to them, then those are red flags. Chicks who are loners have low self esteem and will use you as their only person to dump all their problems on to.
Always look at her eyes. They eyes never lie. If she tells you something and her eyes are saying something else, the you know it's not true. You can tell when her eyes are shifty and don't have a genuine look. Her eyes should show her true expression and feelings. Look for facial expressions too. If her facial expressions don't add up to her words she is lying.
Pictures are the best factor in determining screening. Why? Because you have a perfect snap shot that reveals her true self. Look at her body language, smile, eyes, how she is in with a group. If she looks uncomfortable, self conscious, no expression then she has low self esteem. You can't tell with one picture, but when you look at other pictures, you will see a pattern.
Some of these guys are trying to screen for things they will never know. They think they can put their palms on the top of the chicks head and know exactly how many partners she had and everything about her past. :crackup: But the obvious signs they let go right over their heads.
You can never really screen for her past unless she gives you details on her past. What you need to be screening for is how she is behaving when she is with you. How she feels about herself, how she talks about other people, what she does in certain situations. If she talks against people behind their backs constantly then she will be doing that against you when you're not around.
Partners really don't mean anything today, because if chicks are having sex at younger age the will have higher numbers. Some women you will never know how many men they will have.
I have female friends who I'm not attracted to, but they hook me up with cool stuff and hook me up with their friends, acquaintances, and relatives.
Two of the chicks I know told me their exact numbers (or estimated numbers) one time. This chick is not very good looking, really thin, flat chested, with a lot of freckles. She told me she had 5 boyfriends and hooked up with 3 dudes. She always says she tell guys she's been with 4 dudes after she went over the 4th so she doesn't look like a slut. Another chick said basically the same. So, if she tells you 4 when it's really 8 you will never know and think you have a low number chick. :crackup:
It's pretty much pointless to argue with these other guys. They will never admit they are wrong and will argue tooth and nail while twisting your words around and adding their own words to it.
The fact is, that you can tell the chicks who are obvious sluts.
But you will never know the number of men she's actually fvcked.
There are also other chicks who don't appear as sluts, but who have fvcked quite a few men that you will never know about.
So, trying to figure out how many men each woman has fvcked is a waste of time, because you will never know excatly how many she's fvcked.
But then, a couple of these guys want to argue tooth and nail while twisting your words around even when they are proven wrong. Lame. :yes:
Danger said:
rascal I agree with much of your post. You basically articulate a number of ways to identify a slut.....but then go on to say that you will never know???? Your post seems to be filled with contradictions.
You need to read links to determine sluts? :crackup:
Well, I'm glad you finally agree with me on something. You seem to be making a big thing about this when there is no need to. I don't know how much more clear I can make it for you.
There are no contradictons. Let's try this again.
Sluts are easy to identify, so you can say they would have a high number of partners. Right?
Another poster said he wanted to screen for the number of partners. You can't screen for the number of partners, because you will never know.
The same poster is under the assumption that a girl with a low number of partners will make the best girlfriend. That is not true because it depends on who the girl actually is. Just because her numbers are low doesn't mean she looks good or is a good person.
Some chick you're trying to date could have had 8 boyfriends, but she only mentions 4. You will think she has a low number. You will never know her exact number. Would you call her a slut?
Any average looking girl could have a higher number of partners. So, the dude will think she has a low number when it could be high. You will never know. It really doesn't matter anyway. As long as there is no glaring red flags going on, you shouldn't care. This topic is getting old, let's move on.
