Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Grrr.. I feel this forum is warping my view of women

SteR

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It seems that from every thread I read here (and other forums aswell) that the majority of women are wh0res. I hate it.

I realise that it's more than likely women are going to be painted in a bad light on forums like these, as it's pretty common that guys come here that've been cheated on, with the intention of reforming their ways and stepping up their game.

But I can't seem to get rid of this feeling that no woman can be trusted. It saddens me because I honestly do believe in things such as marriage: that two people can fully commit to eachother, remain faithful and work hard to build a life together.. although all I ever seem to hear is how so-and-so cheated on him, screwed this guy, did this and that blah blah. I almost get the impression that the moment you turn your back on a girl, if a guy comes along and says the right words she'll be down on her knees, sucking his d1ck in no time.

Are there any people who are happy/content with their partner on these forums? Are there girls in existence who are attractive, smart and loyal? :(
 

jonwon

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SteR said:
It seems that from every thread I read here (and other forums aswell) that the majority of women are wh0res. I hate it.

I realise that it's more than likely women are going to be painted in a bad light on forums like these, as it's pretty common that guys come here that've been cheated on, with the intention of reforming their ways and stepping up their game.

But I can't seem to get rid of this feeling that no woman can be trusted. It saddens me because I honestly do believe in things such as marriage: that two people can fully commit to eachother, remain faithful and work hard to build a life together.. although all I ever seem to hear is how so-and-so cheated on him, screwed this guy, did this and that blah blah. I almost get the impression that the moment you turn your back on a girl, if a guy comes along and says the right words she'll be down on her knees, sucking his d1ck in no time.

Are there any people who are happy/content with their partner on these forums? Are there girls in existence who are attractive, smart and loyal? :(
The majourity of people who ask for advice are people who need it, so yes it can seem like alot of negitive stuff, especcially when the person asking for advice is dating what can be described to be a poor choice in a mate, and let's face it - why would these people ask for advice if she was a good choice.

Though guys can create traits that in a way creates the situation they find themselves in, a good % of guys who want advice simply have a very poor filter - hence why a good % of posts as you state can seem like women are negitive - simply because other guys are trying to show that person his filtering system needs a re-check and on-top of that he could develop traits that when he finds a good match - he has a better chance of keeping her in high interest.

The fact of the matter is when a girl has low interest, no matter how much of an Angel she is, she will no doubt turn into a harpie - And the same applies to men too - That is why you will see a-lot of negitivity.

It's partly to do with the choice in a mate and partly to do with the inability to keep a womens interest high.

As for 'no woman can be trusted' - to me this isn't a bad thing to harbour, I'm in a relationship and have been for a number of years, do I feel my girl is trust-worthy? No-one is trust-worthy, in the sense that if the relationship started to show cracks, only a fool would think his girl wouldn't stray due to some moral code of conduct, yes it's all well and good to romanticise about women not cheating on a guy, but let's face it in the real world, a women like a man will cheat if the relationship is pritty shi( - on the other hand some women cheat regardless of the type of relationship.

Hence it's benificial to believe all women cheat, that way you can develop in yourself traits that help re-enforce that if she does cheat, it's not the end of the world, and develop more of an understanding of triggers to cheating and counter them with the way you are - That comes in parts with research and experiance.

As for my girl, currently I could leave her in a room with Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise e.t.c all naked and I KNOW nothing will happen - that isn't to say 2-4 years down the road that won't change - my girl is obsessed and wouldn't do anything to damage her rep in my eyes.
 

zekko

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I'm happy with my girl but I'm in a different age bracket than you are.
The thing about youthful women is, most everyone goes through a rebellious stage at some point. Girls do too. That's when they're most likely to get out there and experiment with loose sexual behavior. They may later realize it's a mistake. So you have to cut people some slack.

The other thing is, a lot of these guys here are going out with very sleazy low quality women that they pick up in bars and clubs. They may be hot looking but they are still low quality. While it's true that not all girls in bars and clubs are slvts, if a girl wants to go slvt it up and get hit on by guys, where do they go? Bars and clubs. So the real skanks will love to frequent these places.

Anyway, the point is, no not all women are disgusting pigs. You may have to look around a little (or a lot) to find a good one, but they are out there.

As for 'no woman can be trusted' - to me this isn't a bad thing to harbour, I'm in a relationship and have been for a number of years, do I feel my girl is trust-worthy? No-one is trust-worthy, in the sense that if the relationship started to show cracks, only a fool would think his girl wouldn't stray due to some moral code of conduct
And I agree with this here. You should always keep your eyes open and be aware of what could be around the corner. While there are quality women, I do believe that anyone (man or woman) could cheat if the circumstances are just right. A woman may not be likely to cheat, but if you are in a relationship, it is healthiest to always be able and willing to walk away at a moment's notice, if it should become necessary.
 

Sir Psycho Sexy

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SteR said:
Are there any people who are happy/content with their partner on these forums? Are there girls in existence who are attractive, smart and loyal? :(
Yes and Yes

With that said, dont trust women until they have earned it because some will inevitably cheat
 

Iceberg

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SteR said:
Are there any people who are happy/content with their partner on these forums? Are there girls in existence who are attractive, smart and loyal? :(

There are plenty of fine women out there. I've had no life-altering bad experiences with girlfriends. But on the way to getting these good girlfriends, you're going to encounter a few bad apples. If you interpret the advice on here the way I do, you just learn how to weed those women out. Or at least put the bad girls in the category of booty call, and not treat them like real girlfriends.

Aside from that, we're raised to view women as these innocent little lambs. Treat them nice and gentle, and they'll love you. But in reality, it's the opposite. You have to un-learn years of what movies, and books and female friends taught you about women and see things for what they really are.

It's not that they're all wh0res...(Although they definitely want you to treat them that way in bed)...this site just teaches you that women want MEN. They want you to tell them when they're wrong. They want you to be stronger than them. They want you to come home, grab them by the arm, and take them to the bedroom without saying a word. Those are the lessons I've learned. Women can be trusted...after they've earned it. Once again...they're not as innocent as you wanted to believe.

Some of these guys hate women. Well, some of these guys are weak in the head. It's not about hating women...it's just sorting out the bad ones from the good ones. You put yourself in the position of evaluator. Not the girl.

/end rant
 

SteR

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jonwon said:
The majourity of people who ask for advice are people who need it, so yes it can seem like alot of negitive stuff, especcially when the person asking for advice is dating what can be described to be a poor choice in a mate, and let's face it - why would these people ask for advice if she was a good choice.

Though guys can create traits that in a way creates the situation they find themselves in, a good % of guys who want advice simply have a very poor filter - hence why a good % of posts as you state can seem like women are negitive - simply because other guys are trying to show that person his filtering system needs a re-check and on-top of that he could develop traits that when he finds a good match - he has a better chance of keeping her in high interest.

The fact of the matter is when a girl has low interest, no matter how much of an Angel she is, she will no doubt turn into a harpie - And the same applies to men too - That is why you will see a-lot of negitivity.

It's partly to do with the choice in a mate and partly to do with the inability to keep a womens interest high.
Agreed.

jonwon said:
As for 'no woman can be trusted' - to me this isn't a bad thing to harbour, I'm in a relationship and have been for a number of years, do I feel my girl is trust-worthy? No-one is trust-worthy, in the sense that if the relationship started to show cracks, only a fool would think his girl wouldn't stray due to some moral code of conduct, yes it's all well and good to romanticise about women not cheating on a guy, but let's face it in the real world, a women like a man will cheat if the relationship is pritty shi( - on the other hand some women cheat regardless of the type of relationship.

Hence it's benificial to believe all women cheat, that way you can develop in yourself traits that help re-enforce that if she does cheat, it's not the end of the world, and develop more of an understanding of triggers to cheating and counter them with the way you are - That comes in parts with research and experiance.
I'd like to believe that I'm a good enough judge of character to at least be able to spot the women who cheat regardless from the women who would cheat due to my lack of effort in the relationship.

I mean I can completely understand that if a guy doesn't take care of himself, doesn't pull his weight and doesn't take care of his woman then she's likely to have second thoughts about the relationship. Ideally she'd tell you that she's unhappy and give you the opportunity to fix things however I accept that some will take the cheating route. I wouldn't blame the woman for the failure of the relationship either.. it's the man's failure to be a man that has led her to her situation. How she chooses to handle the situation is down to her own moral code.

What I do disagree on is the whole idea that I can never fully trust a woman. I don't like the idea of keeping certain parts of my life completely locked away from a woman in the fear that she'll cheat. I do understand the whole 'protect the heart' philosophy but eventually, if you do decide to get married, I can't see how you'd be able to hide anything from your partner and call it a proper marriage? I'd like to think that I'd be very careful about who I reveal certain parts of information to.. but if I thought I'd found a woman that I could trust, I would slowly bear everything (and I'd expect her to do the same).

Is this a very naive way of thinking? I realise people may disagree with me but I'm interested to hear other opinions.
 

Kailex

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I never fully trust ANYONE. PERIOD.
At any given point in time, ANYONE could equally betray you or use information you'd given them against you.

It's not that ALL women are EVIL (but I'm sure if you asked women about men, they'd say: They're ALL the same), it's just that you have to learn how to differentiate the good from the bad and that's what this forum is about. Somewhere down the road, the lines begin to blur and the areas get a little grayer between being realistic or being a misogamist.

I love women. I believe they are sexy creatures when they take care of themselves up until a certain age. But I believe a LOT of them aren't "high quality" for ME. This board is mostly geared towards scorned men and their situations, so you'll probably get ONE success story for every FIFTY stories about how they were wrong or were did wrong.

What's different about this site is that other posters WILL point out what YOU did wrong... while sites like Loveshack will almost always point the finger at anyone but the woman. Just go browse that site for a while and you'll start seeing a pattern.

Here at SS, the focus is on improving yourself but a few people confuse this for: Women suck at life.

That's NOT what you should be aiming yourself for. This site and the DJ Bible are about giving you the TOOLS necessary to better select women for you as you grow older. That's why it's generally advised to not even THINK about being in a serious relationship ebfore the age of 25. It's not that we hate women, it's just that the younger and inexperienced you are, the more at risk you are of making the wrong choices based on hormonal patterns.


And sorry, but even in marriage, you don't HAVE to share every little detail of your life. I'm sure almost every marriage has certain skeletons in the closet.
 

jonwon

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SteR said:
Agreed.



I'd like to believe that I'm a good enough judge of character to at least be able to spot the women who cheat regardless from the women who would cheat due to my lack of effort in the relationship.

I mean I can completely understand that if a guy doesn't take care of himself, doesn't pull his weight and doesn't take care of his woman then she's likely to have second thoughts about the relationship. Ideally she'd tell you that she's unhappy and give you the opportunity to fix things however I accept that some will take the cheating route. I wouldn't blame the woman for the failure of the relationship either.. it's the man's failure to be a man that has led her to her situation. How she chooses to handle the situation is down to her own moral code.

What I do disagree on is the whole idea that I can never fully trust a woman. I don't like the idea of keeping certain parts of my life completely locked away from a woman in the fear that she'll cheat. I do understand the whole 'protect the heart' philosophy but eventually, if you do decide to get married, I can't see how you'd be able to hide anything from your partner and call it a proper marriage? I'd like to think that I'd be very careful about who I reveal certain parts of information to.. but if I thought I'd found a woman that I could trust, I would slowly bear everything (and I'd expect her to do the same).

Is this a very naive way of thinking? I realise people may disagree with me but I'm interested to hear other opinions.
It's not naive just a little infantile, bear with me here - It's like wanting the world to slot into your world view and conform to what you believe the world should be.

I'd say sadly, but it's not sad, it's just realistic - you can never truly know if your woman will cheat or not, to me your at a disadvantage if you assume some romanticised notion that she won't cheat, hence this is almost like stepping into the boundaries of one-itus and 'the one' and all that other Hollywood twaddle - Reality states that if you dont want a woman to cheat, first you have to choose wisely second you have to be concurrent with being that man she has no desire to cheat on - even then there is no guarantee, that is why if she 'does' cheat you also develop a sort of abundance mindset that allows you to move on and choose again, but being able to reflect and not fall into some spiral that has been created by your world perception.

In an ideal world women don't cheat and men don't, but there are so many factors when it comes to cheating, you can never fully and utterly believe that one women is immune to it, like no man is immune to it - when you 'accept' this, all that added drama your giving yourself will be eliminated from your mind and your then free to ignore this variable and accept it for what it is, instead of allowing it to consume your thoughts.

Shi9 happens.

Instead of worry about 'will she' concerntrate on 'how to prevent her' or 'what to do if it happens' - that way you've set in damage control, this thinking shouldn't consume more than a minute to an hour at the most, then if it happens, you are in parts prepared for it and not blind sided through some romanticed notion derived from some loved up rom-com - That is not to say avoid women, enjoy them, but remember they are simply human and not robots that conform to some higher moral world view from a guy who desires all women to be faithful, even the daintiest flower could be the cheatin ho a few years down the line - you really never know, hence don't worry about it, accept it, enjoy the company of women, marry them if you want, but when or 'IF' it happens know how to handle it - that is to say it may never happen, who knows? You can only lower the odds, or increase them - but you can never eliminate them.
 

Razor Sharp

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Life is full of surprises and yes, the game truly is a crap shoot. That doesn't mean you should not take a chance on someone, you just have to be smart about it. Your odds of success are directly proportional to your ability to discern situations, see people for what they are and take responsibility for your actions.

The negativity that you see here is the result of dudes getting burned, most of the time the reason for this is not because all women are wh*res. It's because they let themselves be blinded by beauty. Good genetics have a way of disengaging a brother's common sense. You read these stories and see red flags all over the place, b*tches straight up disrespecting left and right. But the poster ignores it because he wants to "get lucky" with the HB10.

Truth is that the most powerful tool we have as men in this game is qualification and most guys throw it right out the window because she meets the visual criteria and seems friendly. This results in massive failure because you can't make someone appreciate something that they did not have to work for. If you really want to surround yourself with beautiful, quality women, then you need to exude a vibe that says "I think you're hot, but I already got some hotties on my team... what else you got going for you?"

It's also human nature to ignore your own flaws and place blame for your situation on other people. A lot of these field reports show guys who have little to no game (to their credit at least they try). But when they pop off some corny sh*t, or are just not being congruent with their persona and get bad reactions, is it the chick's fault when he gets shot down?

Another scenario - a dude steals a girl from her boyfriend and develops a relationship with her. Months later she cheats on him and his whole world implodes. Is she a wh*re? Well DUH, she showed her true colors from the start of the relationship, dumbass should known what he was signing up for. But in the midst of heartbreak dudes dont want to hear this reality. It's much easier to chalk em all up as wh*res than to face the possibility that you made a bad choice.

On the flip side of this you have these players with ridiculous game taking new girls home every other night. They are the first ones to tell you never to trust a female because they sleep with committed/engaged and sometimes married women. What they fail to see, however is that their game is tailored to attract a certain type of hoe, usually one with poor self-esteem, morals and zero loyalty. The ones that actually have integrity do not respond to their game, in fact they are repulsed by it. But since they only look at the ones they took home, they assume all women are the same.

These are all just filters of perception - people asserting their viewpoints as fact because their myopic viewpoints don't let them see the whole picture. Don't let their ideas throw you off course. Take it all in stride and use your own experience and instincts as your guide.

When all's said and done, a woman who will open her legs to some dude she just met does not value her sexuality or womanhood, period. When your game is tailored for "fast seduction", is it really any wonder when you find yourself in the company of cheap sluts?

You also have to realize the general purpose of this site. I see it as sort of a wakeup call for the clueless. Too many guys work off the assumption that women are these delicate, god-like creatures who deserve to be treated with reverence and worshipped. Part of the deprogramming process here is to let these chumps know what they are dealing with, a very high probability that the precious angel they pine over is just a dumb hor with nothing more to offer than a pretty face or a nice ass.

The overall tone comes off as negative because its HARD WORK getting these guys to see women any other way (especially when its that one "special" girl).

Personally, I have been in several great relationships, that mostly didnt work out because I wasnt ready to settle. Still good friends with a few ex's and they'd take me back in a heartbeat. From experience I can say that good, loyal women are out there. The only trick to finding them is being a good, loyal man who knows what he wants and is not afraid to say NO to a pretty face for the sake of his own standards.

The trick to keeping them around is very simple. Keep them on their toes. Let them see they have competition sometimes and dont become boring, predictable, possessive or exhibit any of the chump tendencies that scared so many of them off to begin with - and you should be fine.

Like I said there are no guarantees, but you can greatly influence the odds based on how you play the game.
 
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3countriesPlan

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This forum warped my view thats for sure. Its called seeing the light. Girls are some wicked creatures (as are guys). I knew PUAs who specialized in doing girls with bfs or fiances.. And they were always successful. Watch the nature channel, you'll see the females going off to cheat when they arent watched right or macked right (if thats possible for a prarie dog to mack) by their partner. This forum helps you learn how to get your game right but unfortunately provides no help really for relationship game. Thats just another science in and of itself.
 

Last_straw

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I don't think this forum has warped my view of women, but the way women have treated me has. It's gotten to the point where I realize that all women are untrustworthy *****s. If I ever get into a relationship (which is doubtful at this point in time) then I'll be very wary of her (she'll basically have to earn my trust, which won't be an easy thing).
 

Razor Sharp

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Last_straw said:
If I ever get into a relationship (which is doubtful at this point in time) then I'll be very wary of her (she'll basically have to earn my trust, which won't be an easy thing).
Bolded for emphasis. This is a healthy attitude to have. Make them work for it, never give that sh*t away. And always be skeptical - if it seems too good to be true, 8 times out of 10, it really is.

+1 Rep
 

backbreaker

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I met my current fiancee because of this forum. ironically enough, there are people here who hate the fact that it's the only woman i talk about (that's kinda how you roll hen you **** 1 person for 3 years). In all serious, while she's a great gal and I would not trade her for the world, you have to get rid of this sense of 'true love'. that was the most important thing i learned here, true love does not exist.

as Donald Draper from mad men said, true love was created by people like me to sale you stockings


I have learned about frame and keeping the frame, even if it pisses her off from time to time, women can be their own worst enemy. Rollo has this superman story, he knows what i am talking about, you should read it, it shows the problem with listening to women in a nutshell and is one of the beszt most eye opening reads I have ever seen.

Anyway, true love does not exist. I can honestly say I love her, but with that said, if she were to gain 100 pounds, she is not the person I fell in love with. If I went flat broke, I am not the person she fell in love with. If I became this self loathing chump, I am not the person she fell in love with.

Most problems are usually dealing with the men, rather or not the man knows it or not. Most issues can be fixed or could have been prevented with your behavior. Which one is more likely, every woman that you meat is a *** scuzzeling ***** or maybe you are not that much of a catch the common denominator between all my problems and myself is me.

I have learned that just because someone is married, or have a GF, doesn't mean they are successful. A woman can **** you, date you, marry you even and not like you.

This place has it's issues but it has done more good then harm, which is why I stick around, to prevent some people from making the same mistakes I have made and by that, help myself keep the frame of my own relationships.
 

Alle_Gory

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SteR said:
It seems that from every thread I read here (and other forums aswell) that the majority of women are wh0res. I hate it.
Welcome to reality.

Are there girls in existence who are attractive, smart and loyal?
Sure there are. But loyalty takes time and effort, with men and especially with women.

I don't see how you think this is all negative. There's alot to learn here. If you become a strong man, a person of value, the chances of your girl straying are almost zero. If you slip back into a needy, weak chump then your scenario happens.

Would you rather remain naive about how the world works? Stay in your comfortable little Disneyland Branded paradise?
 

Black suit

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Useless little ****s, revelling in their vapid existence in the farthest horizons of apathy. Meh.

2 uses.

1. ****ing.

2. And this is important. They will change themselves as required and populate the world YOU create, if you're strong and have an incredible frame.
 

jafyk

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backbreaker said:
I met my current fiancee because of this forum. ironically enough, there are people here who hate the fact that it's the only woman i talk about (that's kinda how you roll hen you **** 1 person for 3 years). In all serious, while she's a great gal and I would not trade her for the world, you have to get rid of this sense of 'true love'. that was the most important thing i learned here, true love does not exist.

as Donald Draper from mad men said, true love was created by people like me to sale you stockings


I have learned about frame and keeping the frame, even if it pisses her off from time to time, women can be their own worst enemy. Rollo has this superman story, he knows what i am talking about, you should read it, it shows the problem with listening to women in a nutshell and is one of the beszt most eye opening reads I have ever seen.

Anyway, true love does not exist. I can honestly say I love her, but with that said, if she were to gain 100 pounds, she is not the person I fell in love with. If I went flat broke, I am not the person she fell in love with. If I became this self loathing chump, I am not the person she fell in love with.

Most problems are usually dealing with the men, rather or not the man knows it or not. Most issues can be fixed or could have been prevented with your behavior. Which one is more likely, every woman that you meat is a *** scuzzeling ***** or maybe you are not that much of a catch the common denominator between all my problems and myself is me.

I have learned that just because someone is married, or have a GF, doesn't mean they are successful. A woman can **** you, date you, marry you even and not like you.

This place has it's issues but it has done more good then harm, which is why I stick around, to prevent some people from making the same mistakes I have made and by that, help myself keep the frame of my own relationships.
Please can you post a link with this ROllo superman story. Thanks.
 

CollegeLife

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If you think this forum warps your mind, read the latest post from Roissy at his blog. He has another Chicks Digs Jerks post telling about how this one aloof, terse, and ****y guy with a little muscle ended up in a love triangle with one kill the other. The guy, wheels the girls with pure unapologetic ******* game.


Reading that and you'll wonder if any civility, not pedestalization nor wonder if she can be trusted, just basic decency between people have a reason. Why bother caring about her well-being at all if playing on her insecurities and then beating her raises more attraction than kindness (or quite the opposite).


It's kinda nice to see this threads and reading of guys in good relationships. Good counterbalance and reminder that one can have a good relationship (with a pretty girl, I assume they are pretty) without act like a complete douchebag. I think.
 

SteR

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CollegeLife said:
It's kinda nice to see this threads and reading of guys in good relationships. Good counterbalance and reminder that one can have a good relationship (with a pretty girl, I assume they are pretty) without act like a complete douchebag. I think.
Well this is what I'd hope.

Regardless of all the horror stories I read on these types of forums, I still believe there are decent people out there (this includes men and women).. it just seems so damn difficult to find any girl worth giving a **** about :(

Anyways I appreciate all the responses.. it's interesting hearing all these viewpoints.
 

wait_out

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You have to judge people in the context of their environment. The fundamental physical and psychological needs of men and women aren't different, but we're living at the edge of progress and the unintentional consequences it brings.

You're not going to see the vast majority of urbanized western women, organizing their life from childhood towards supporting their man, becoming a good (dutiful?) wife and eventually mother. Women won't tie themselves to committed relationships with average guys with average potential in their 20's and most guys wouldn't do it either. It is no longer a cultural norm. We do see a lot of conventionally desirable women sink immense amounts of time into exercise, partying, careers, beauticians -- not because they're "wh0res", but because it's the kind of social networking they perceive will bring them a good mate and by extension life.

The "Sex and the City" model, basically. Roissy has his finger on the pulse of the guys who don't understand or can't adapt and gets fans by erasing the moral ambiguity of this mess. But since women are the sexual gatekeepers, men aren't going to change this model against the will of womankind. You are just going to have to deal with it -- despondency is not a good method!

If you find a woman independent enough to go against the grain here, she has a better chance of being loyal despite outside influences (media, her friends, other guys cutting you down, etc). The flip side, there's a reason she's going against the grain. And she might not be conventionally attractive ("hot") enough to catch your attention in the first place.
 

Groovy

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"A person who trusts no one can't be trusted."
Jerome Blattner

I'm just adding this quote to discussion... I don't really know much about this subject. But why not trust people once in a while? If you know them well and had time to figure them out...


"A man who doesn't trust himself can never truly trust anyone else."
Cardinal de Retz
 
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