Found an ex on POF

[HalfAddict]

This was six years ago she was 17 going on 18 and I was 23, we worked together... all sorts of stupidity to be had. Broke up because she was immature.

Had only spoken to her on occasion over the years when we happened to see one another in public.

Decided to drop her a line when I saw her profile, sent a few messages back and forth dropped my number and said if you ever wanna talk here ya go. To which she responds why don't you drop me a line and gives me her number....

Not all that terribly important but I am wondering if and how I should play this. Any suggestions other than the ones about all the rules I am breaking?

 

[Black Widow Void]

Although returning to a situation can be tempting on many levels (fixing problems of the past, reconnecting with someone that already 'gets' who you are etc....) there are many reasons this is usually unadviseable. Anyway... when I was your age, I probably wouldn't have listened either

Do your very best to not think of the past. It's easy to get nostalgic and this can not only trip a person up, but it can cloud things as well. Also keep in mind that the girl you knew then is going to be a little different than the one you speak to today (and this will also apply to you as well) .

When chatting by phone, keep the conversation very brief and keep it upbeat! Do not speak of the past between you two. If you are interested in her then you need to create or I should say "recreate" some lite tension (not giving in to every question that she asks) and also provide a trace of mystery. Remember, she already 'knows' you from the past and you do not want to be as predictable as before.

Chances are, if you don't bring up the past, she will. Do your best to steer clear. If she has any inkling that you hold a torch (and I'm not implying that you do) but anyway you don't want to project that sort of image at all. Besides... the 'new' you is "fun" and has had too many good things happen since that period ... so that "the past is all kind of hazy."

 

[pdx1138]

Keep it fun, maybe get some tail on the side.

People change over the years.

I hooked up over the summer with a former date from POF.
She liked me more than I liked her but we had some fun for a short while then I got bored & bolted.

 

[HalfAddict]

Yeah that was what I was thinking guys, it was never THAT serious in the first place so not bringing up the past is no biggie. Just figured it could be fun, I don't take dames seriously so no worries there.

 

[Nutz]

assume the sale and treat her like she's already your gf. basically take charge and lead.

 

[samspade]

"Any suggestions other than the ones about all the rules I am breaking?"

The call of the Sosuave OP!

 

[HalfAddict]

Lol sam point is I am well aware that if I was not way over it, this would be a problem.I know better and I am choosing to do it anyways to see where the dice fall. So telling me to not contact an ex is rubbish, because I know I am doing it, I am doing it on purpose. Six years is a long time and it's no skin off my back if she is full of it.

 

[HalfAddict]

Got an update here. After I posted this I invited her to visit me at a friends house, fooled around a bit. She is pretty much the same girl she was before with an even bigger ego nowadays. Long story short, the next week she texted me to come over and bang, verbatim. She is on the rebound so that is probably the first and last time it will happen but hey, looks like we're on the same page.

 

[betheman]

Got an update here. After I posted this I invited her to visit me at a friends house, fooled around a bit. She is pretty much the same girl she was before with an even bigger ego nowadays. Long story short, the next week she texted me to come over and bang, verbatim. She is on the rebound so that is probably the first and last time it will happen but hey, looks like we're on the same page.

go for it! she seems up front and honest about her expectations, just tell her "cool, Im not looking to get into anything heavy either" , then maybe you can get at it on a regular basis and she can be a plate