daddy issues

[HeMan]

has many of you guys delt with chicks with abandoment issues/daddy issues?

are these type of girls damaged girls and cannot be fixed?

just got out of a relationship with an amazing girl (i thought) who ended up being deeply insecure and ended up attacking me when she faced the pressure of losing me for good.

cant believe i still love her after everything she has done even though i know deep down i cannot be with her anymore after how she behavied. she is an increadible person in so many ways but is too scared after finding out her history.

anyway would like to hear your thoughts about this

thanks

 

[Boilermaker]

how did she attack you? what has she done?

sounds like you were involved in a big fight, both of you have said things you now regret, and that's why you feel that you can't go back - even though you really want to.

 

[HeMan]

she punched me, scratched me, trashed my house

her behaviour worries me deeply

 

[ecko280]

I had a g/f that hit me and scratched me. I never got loud with her or hit her. I am a cool and collect guy. I dump her because of her acting like this. She also had daddy issue. No love from dad.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear He Man,
Had a wife who did that,the Gendarmes came and VERY reluctantly chucked her in the Slammer...Didn't stop the little Monkey from engaging someone to change my own locks on me the next morning....But I was out at the Court House getting a restraining order on her.....When things go wrong,anticipate the worst and go for the Jugular...Never give a Woman Quarter,she will always despise your weakness.

 

[Greasy Pig]

Never give a Woman Quarter,she will always despise your weakness.

Seeing these words on here over a year ago changed my life. Awesome stuff.

 

[ELMER_GANTRY]

girls that have "daddy issues" are usually the girls that have bpd or biploar disorder and are not gf material. they will hate their father and want a father figure in their life and will cheat all the time, and have mental issues like the girl you had a relationship with.

 

[Knight's Cross]

He Man, I'm convinced that a signifigant part of "society", not just women have this problem. The most formative years of our lives are during childhood. My parents weren't perfect, but they cared, and I remember multiple instances where their personal sacrifice made me what I am today.
So, what's that all mean? Well every time I go out with a woman I do some probing about her relationship with her parents. 9 times out of 10 I found if she has bad history with her upbringing it spells doom for the relationship. A recent woman I went out with referred to her father as,"the sperm donor". That's all she saw him sacrificing for her upbringing. Now, she's a good person, but unless she deals with the rage she has for dad, who do you think is going to be her punching bag for man issues? I waived off after date 3. Of course she has put on the full court press to woo me back into her world. Nope, not going there. You only get one life to live.
Do you want to spend it dealing with someone elses issues? As I've said 9/10 women with fractured family are not suitable for LTR. That's probably the same for alot of guys. Unless you deal with your past, people have a tendency to repeat the cycles they grew up with. My favorite priest has a saying,"What we live with we learn, what we learn we become, and what we become has consequences." What he is referring to is raising children. Any moron can make a child. It takes courage and commitment to raise a responsible child into adulthood.
There are exceptions, but when I hear a girl use terms like the one above about her parents, my radar goes into acquisition mode. I am on high alert for other clues. Sure I've got empathy for them, but I want a whole person that's got their emotional life together as much as their physical one.
KC

 

[Findog]

My most recent ex fits the criteria of daddy/abandonment issues. With therapy, they can get better. However, you can't wait around on these girls to get the help that they need. Get on with your life. By far this is the worst breakup I've ever had to endure.

Not everybody who comes from a broken home or difficult childhood is screwed up as an adult, nor does every person that comes from a stable, loving home turn out to be well adjusted when they grow up. What I've learned, however, is that people with low self esteem are dangerous to get involved with. They will eventually treat you as poorly as they treat themselves.

 

[betheman]

... What I've learned, however, is that people with low self esteem are dangerous to get involved with. They will eventually treat you as poorly as they treat themselves.

you have said a mouthfull iin those couple of lines

 

[Sabol]

If you want inevitable heartbreak, date a girl with daddy issues.

Best to pump and dump.

 

[HeMan]

yes u guys are all right

my relationship started offf amazingly and when times got tough she reacted in the most aggressive way by attacking me and threatening to hurt my dog..

guess i need to consider myself i didnt marry her as you never know what she could of done

such a shame though as she was increadible in so many ways. deep down she must have issues i could not understand though as i come from a very stable and loving family

 

[Findog]

My relationship was amazing, stable and great for the first 10.5 months. The last month was still very good, but she seemed "off" in a way, but it wasn't anything that was even worth bringing up and seemed like ordinary relationship issues. She never raged at me or created drama, but she did blindside me when dumping me. They usually have severe issues with intimacy and when you get too close they push you away. Unless they get help, they will punish you for the sins of their absent or abusive father figure. Girls like this either go for guys who are strikingly similar to their father (in order to heal the wounds of childhood) or the opposite (to avoid the repetition of being abandoned/abused).

My girl told me on our first date that her biological father abandoned her mom when pregnant with her and told her to get an abortion. She also told me after we started dating that her relationship history consisted of only two relationships that lasted as long as a year, with most of the time she dumped guys after a few months because they annoyed her and they were losers. I treated her well and she responded enthusiastically to me. She did a lot of "firsts" with me: first guy that got introduced to biological father (she hadn't had contact with him for years before we started dating, we ended up meeting him for dinner), she sat her parents down and told them I was "The One" and different from all the other guys she'd dated and her parents wanted to meet mine. I was naive in the extreme to think that because I treated her well, loved her unconditionally and she responded enthusiastically to me, that her past was irrelevant. Girls like this don't know how to create lasting, loving relationships with men. It's really sad.

I feel overwhelming sadness for her. Deep inside she is a beautiful and sensitive woman with a good soul. But unless she seeks out help for her issues, she will never be who God originally intended for her to be. You can't fix these types. Breakups are always hard to deal with and get over, but I've never had this kind of heartbreak before. I wouldn't wish it on anybody.

 

[HeMan]

i agree findog

breaking up with these girls destroy you emotionally because their love towards you are so extreme! they make u feel so good because you become there life. they give everything to make you happy

and then they react in extreme way that is so hard to accept, especially as it happens so suddenly

 

[Falcon25]

You may want to ask this question to our homosexual members named "ELMER GANTRY" and also "KarmaSutra". PM them if you can. Coming from a gay point of view, they have answers that will solve your problems. Look them up! Good luck!