article: A man's top 5 reasons to grow up and get married

MatureDJ

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http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2013/01/26/man-top-5-reasons-to-grow-up-and-get-married/

1. You’ll be richer – Yes. Not only do married couples make more, save more, have a higher net worth and qualify for more benefits/financial incentives than lonely, single folk… but your kids will be richer too. Which brings me to my next point

2. Would somebody please think of the children!! – The single biggest indicator of child poverty is whether both original parents are still together. Not only that, but children in married households get better grades, are less disruptive in class and less likely to develop behavioral disorders than children from non-married households. So be married long and prosper. Your kids will too.

3. You’ll have more sex… A LOT MORE SEX – Okay so you may not want kids. You may despise them. I get it. Sticky hands. Let’s say you’re just another selfish, narcissistic bachelor (or bachelorette) who quite frankly, isn’t deserving of the unconditional love you may oh-so-luckily find. You just want the sex. Statistically, not only do married people have more sex, they have better, more satisfying sex. If the two of you should hold off on sex until marriage, those statistics become even more promising. Here’s a perfect example of where Hollywood gets it wrong. In the real world, while Alfie fruitlessly toiled away at picking up harlots from the bar, suffering a mean case of whiskey-wiener, Mr. Cleaver was getting busy on the regular. Them’s the real breaks.

4. You won’t be such a pathetic sloth – Married people are more productive. Married men in particular, have higher employment rates, work longer hours and receive better wages. It’s time to stop wading through puddles of your own filth as you reach for the hotpockets and have a dame whip you into shape. You’re welcome.

5. Don’t die sick, miserable and alone. This would seem to be self-explanatory. Sadly, it’s not. Young people think that being young and single is the “fun and free” time of your life, while marriage is something that can wait for the days when you’re ready to grow fat, boring and settle down. Married people not only live longer lives, they live healthier lives. There are too many factors at play here to even list. From married people statistically maintaining healthier weights, being more active and having lower mortality rates, to married women incurring less severe illnesses, enjoying better cancer survival rates and of course… lower rates of domestic abuse (as opposed to those merely cohabitating). Yes ladies, it’s true, living with an uncommitted, self-absorbed jackass can be hazardous to your health.
Here is an associated article that references it - and where there are some good comments.

http://www.theatlantic.com/sexes/archive/2013/01/marriage-is-not-a-24-7-sleepover-party/272684/
 

Warrior74

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So. Some of us wanna be blue balled, slovenly broke young pretty corpses. It's called freedom, I'll pay that coinage for it.
 

PlayHer Man

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What a load of sh!t.

First of all.. there is no connection between maturity (or "growing up" as they call it) and being married. I know lots of very immature married people.

Now lets break down the idiocy of this article:

1. You’ll be richer

Not necessarily. How much wealth you have depends on income and the financial choices you make. PERIOD.

Also.. how much of this money do you get to KEEP if you're married? Women are the top consumers marketers target. Women like to spend, spend, spend. So you may have more money coming in, but it will be going out just as fast with the majority of materialistic "live up the the Joneses" women out there. :crazy:


2. Would somebody please think of the children!!

Getting married doesn't guarantee your kids will grow up with their parents "together". I guess this author never heard of "seperation" and ummm... DIVORCE. :crackup:

3. You’ll have more sex… A LOT MORE SEX

HAHA... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Wait what?

Yeah... that is what women like to say in order to lure gullible men into the marriage trap. Saying marriage leads to more sex is like saying a car becomes more reliable once you own it. Buy this car and it will stop breaking down forever!! Hahah.. yeah right!

4. You won’t be such a pathetic sloth

I'm not a pathetic sloth NOW. But thanks for the sexism :D

5. Don’t die sick, miserable and alone.

Again.. looks like SOMEONE never heard of "seperations" or DIVORCE or.. umm.. I dunno.. not dying at the exact same time as your wife/husband. Yeah.. one of you will die first Einstein!! :crazy:
 

Poonani Maker

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The ONLY way I'm getting married is if she is stay-at-home house MAID. Yes, that is the Only reason any man should "marry" a woman from the beginning of time until this planet is vaporized. I hire maids to clean my house once every 3 months. If I get married, that's all she has to do cause I can support us both. But as we know, marriage is no longer for the man's benefit. It's a woman working so Now....She gets to tell You what chores You have to do around the house You paid for in Your name. Nuh-uh, not in my world. In my world, the woman is the maid. I'll have no other aspirations for her. That's all she needs to be able to accomplish, cleaning my house and possibly teaching the kids or homeschooling.

To have a wife working gives her the Right to order you around in your own house. That's why none of this sh!t ever works anymore. It's why the 60% divorce rate.
 

( . )( . )

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It’s time to stop wading through puddles of your own filth as you reach for the hotpockets and have a dame whip you into shape. You’re welcome.
What's this guy on. Western women whip men into shape? He's either clinically blind or he's taking the piss.

He's literally wrong on almost every point, that's damn impressive.

Steven Crowder is a comedian and Fox News contributor. Follow him on Twitter@scrowder.
He certainly is.
 

Jitterbug

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I assume he's taking the piss since he's a comedian.

A++ will lol again.
 

Burroughs

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The most important reason NOT to get married

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=195329

In a sane society every man should be asked to watch this video before he is married...and contemplate whether the wife who **loves** him could ever do this to him.

then again a sane society would never.........
 

backbreaker

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You’ll be richer
nothing is an ambition killer like a family. you might work overtime but you are going to be less prone tot ake risks, and it's risks not necessarily hard work that creates real wealth.


. Would somebody please think of the children!!
i believe the children are our future. that's why you are better off not having them until you are older beucase you can't support a child, financially, emotionally or whatever until you hae gotten your own house in order.

3. You’ll have more sex… A LOT MORE SEX
i don't know one man in the history of mankind who actually gets MORE sex married than he did single (from the same woman)

You won’t be such a pathetic sloth
that's not good enough
 
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user43770

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I'm familiar with the author. He's a Christian, do-gooder that used to make conservative youtube videos. Fox News, trying to reach a younger demographic, started giving him appearances. Apparently, all it takes is the use of sarcasm to be considered a “comedian," because the guy has never been funny.
 

samspade

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Only #2 (to have children) makes sense and is a good reason to give incentives to the married.

Calling bachelors "pathetic sloths" wading through puddles of filth and eating Hot Pockets tells me all I need to know about this man's arguments.

Even a female I know said once, "You're going to die alone, even if you have family around you. You're still the one dying - alone." I thought that was spot on. (Unless it's a sudden death in a car accident or plane crash - and in the latter you're likely to die with a bunch of a$$holes.)
 

betheman

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samspade said:
Even a female I know said once, "You're going to die alone, even if you have family around you. You're still the one dying - alone." I thought that was spot on. (Unless it's a sudden death in a car accident or plane crash - and in the latter you're likely to die with a bunch of a$$holes.)
initially I thought the authour was a female when I saw that point, it is such a female thing to say, as the female you know said, we all die alone, who really wants kids etc around you when you are gasping for breath? ****ting yourself because your body is breaking down, organs are failing and you are hallucinating? ive seen it, it isnt pretty and I wouldnt want that for my kids.

I enjoy being a man, fvuck the male shaming
 

PlayHer Man

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betheman said:
initially I thought the authour was a female when I saw that point, it is such a female thing to say, as the female you know said, we all die alone, who really wants kids etc around you when you are gasping for breath? ****ting yourself because your body is breaking down, organs are failing and you are hallucinating? ive seen it, it isnt pretty and I wouldnt want that for my kids.

I enjoy being a man, fvuck the male shaming
And its funny how people (both male and female) are always trying to SELL marriage to men. When a woman stays single no one shames her over it. They make excuses for her instead and say how "there are no good men left" or "men can't handle her" or whatever nonsense.

Women are never shamed for their behavior good or bad. Even being overweight, slutty and b!tchy isn't worthy of shame these days. Selfishness and self preservation is praised and applauded. BUT when a man looks out of his own best interests.. he is immature, selfish, cold, cowardly, weak, etc.
 

speed dawg

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1. You’ll be richer – Yes. Not only do married couples make more, save more, have a higher net worth and qualify for more benefits/financial incentives than lonely, single folk… but your kids will be richer too. Which brings me to my next point
WTF? You may make double, but you have 2 people! Even more with kids. Idiot.

2. Would somebody please think of the children!! – The single biggest indicator of child poverty is whether both original parents are still together. Not only that, but children in married households get better grades, are less disruptive in class and less likely to develop behavioral disorders than children from non-married households. So be married long and prosper. Your kids will too.
I agree with this.

3. You’ll have more sex… A LOT MORE SEX – Okay so you may not want kids. You may despise them. I get it. Sticky hands. Let’s say you’re just another selfish, narcissistic bachelor (or bachelorette) who quite frankly, isn’t deserving of the unconditional love you may oh-so-luckily find. You just want the sex. Statistically, not only do married people have more sex, they have better, more satisfying sex. If the two of you should hold off on sex until marriage, those statistics become even more promising. Here’s a perfect example of where Hollywood gets it wrong. In the real world, while Alfie fruitlessly toiled away at picking up harlots from the bar, suffering a mean case of whiskey-wiener, Mr. Cleaver was getting busy on the regular. Them’s the real breaks.
I'll agree with this too. Odds are, in a good marriage, you'll have more regular sex than a single person. And more fulfilling. But it's also with one woman vs. many different varieties of p*ssy.

4. You won’t be such a pathetic sloth – Married people are more productive. Married men in particular, have higher employment rates, work longer hours and receive better wages. It’s time to stop wading through puddles of your own filth as you reach for the hotpockets and have a dame whip you into shape. You’re welcome.
F*cking stupid.

5. Don’t die sick, miserable and alone. This would seem to be self-explanatory. Sadly, it’s not. Young people think that being young and single is the “fun and free” time of your life, while marriage is something that can wait for the days when you’re ready to grow fat, boring and settle down. Married people not only live longer lives, they live healthier lives. There are too many factors at play here to even list. From married people statistically maintaining healthier weights, being more active and having lower mortality rates, to married women incurring less severe illnesses, enjoying better cancer survival rates and of course… lower rates of domestic abuse (as opposed to those merely cohabitating). Yes ladies, it’s true, living with an uncommitted, self-absorbed jackass can be hazardous to your health.
I agree you don't really want to grow old alone, but there are many ways to form a network of friends/family. I don't know how you could prove the healthier part, I think that's a pile of sh*t too.
 

VladPatton

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You'll be richer huh? Because kids, a baby car seat, stroller, diapers, mini van, and just plain old food for the lil bastard is oh so cheap. Pile that on top of your wife's mouth for hunger, shoes and rent/mortgage.

God, I can't wait until I finally meet my super model/brain surgeon dreamgirl so I can comfortably settle down in a mid-Manhattan penthouse already. I just know she's around the corner. Aaaaany day now.

Article is a crock of hot, steamy caca.
 

sodbuster

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[1]NOPE, make and save more NOW.[2] Divorced,kids had to deal with it.[3] MAYBE, but is all the bull**** you put up with worth it? there's something to be said for peace [4]house isn't any worse than it was...but it's cleaned WHEN I WANT TO....not when SHE thinks it needs to be done.[5]still divorced...not betting she'll stop in that day
 

goundra

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5? I can't think of ONE, actually ,involving a US b*tch. Now, I can see bringing over a 3rd world woman, having her make a lot of money, build a lot of credit, and paying you most of it, until she gets US citizenship, which takes 5 years. Getting paid 20-30k a year, for 5 years, can set you up for life financially, if you know what to do with that income, and if you don't just sit around on your ass, having/wanting to blow her money on bs.
 

Nutz

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Everything about this article is wrong. It's just 100% unadulterated feminine imperative bs.
 
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user43770

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Nutz said:
Everything about this article is wrong. It's just 100% unadulterated feminine imperative bs.

I don't think the author is a feminist sympathizer, he just believes in the bible. He's being a good Christian.
 

channingtatum

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This article is actually very correct. I've seen these statistics outside of an article like this. If you marry the RIGHT girl, this is all very true. Women are not the problem, dip**** guys who marry the absolute wrong woman are. You're in control of who you marry. Go read "The Millionaire Next Door", 90% of them are married to a GOOD woman.
 
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