am i being too much with new gf? first time she hasn't replied.

[Jeffst1980]

Once you've gotten physical with a girl, you shouldn't really have any need to call her. She will contact YOU- you've already "won" her, so there's no need to keep chasing. To the contrary; calling and texting too much will shut off her attraction to you.

Women NEED guys to be a bit unavailable to feel sexual attraction. Doesn't mean you play games and ignore her; it just means you sit back and let her engage you. She WANTS to have to work to win you over; that's what turns her on. Leave the ball in her court and she'll initiate every time.

 

[LoneWolf]

that's what i was doing. because pretty much everytime we got together we had sex. so i figured it's harmful to text the next day or two to say i had a great time and talk soon. i just went a little over the top texting her a couple more times the next few days. but i don't think it damaged anything too bad.

well, today is the day and she said all her essays are due in and she's free after that. but i will just keep the silence going and wait for her to contact me. six days, no contact so far. longest it's been.

 

[f283000]

You know you got problems when you're sending messages to your girlfriend ON FACEBOOK! This is your freakin girlfriend for goodness sakes and you're sending messages to her through facebook? Even though she did reply I bet she was probably taken back a bit. She expects HER MAN to be a little more personal. She expects the man she's f*** to talk to her face to face or at least let her hear his voice.

I don't think she expected the man she's f8*** to be sending her messages like "ive been practising bbal! i will beat you one day!"

You think James Bond would be sending a woman messages remind her how she's better at something than him or that he's practicing just to beat her? Well first of all James Bond wouldn't let himself lose at basketball to a female

 

[LoneWolf]

she's not my gf. i shouldn't of said that in the title but i can't change it now. anyway, look, whatever man.. we been on 5 dates, had sex twice, she took me to her home, met her parents, went out with her and her friends. if that dont mean much to her well fuk it then. shes the one who went on a dating site and put after a relationship. that is what i want too and id be glad to keep seeing her and all. but yeah, i cant be fuked anymore with these stupid rules and crap us guys have to follow just to not look needy or desperate or whatever the fuk. im done with this girl. now that it's easter, that's probably another week gone that i won't see her. usually it's family time now. it's really up to her now.. im actually curious just to see if she does contact me again. cause i wont be.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Why would someone commit themselves only to a girl that wasn't even there GF, Spin more plates and quit b*tchin over one female. This is YOUR fault. Why be clingy to a girl especially when it's not your girlfriend. Too many women in this world for that my friend.

 

[LoneWolf]

cause i can't help it. i don't know. i know it's my fault man. i've always been like that with any girls i like. i just get caught up into romance and sh1t. it's bad i know. like i said before i think i do it because i think to myself if i lose this one, it'll take me another 10 years to find a nice girl like her. cause come on lets face it. there's a lot of hoes out there.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

I mean, the first step in your recovery is admitting you have a problem. Just approach my girls my friend and your problem shall get better.

 

[blackwolf]

(other account)

so i guess i should assume she's not interested anymore. 7 days now and nothing. i would of thought me going out with friends clubbing last week would of helped a little in her wondering why i went all silent (maybe i hooked up with another girl - in her mind) - guess not.

probably won't see her this weekend either cause of easter. doooomed!

 

[blackwolf]

okay, i didn't expect this but she just called. its 2pm here on friday (easter and everythings closed) i was caught off guard with this and not sure how i did. the call went for 5 minutes. i dont like talking much on the phone. so i looked at my phone and it was her calling and i was a little surprised. i almost didn't answer just to make it look like i was busy. but i answered it after a lot of rings. i probably should of called her back later but i don't like doing that with her because its really hard to get a hold of her especially in the afternoon and night and i hate calling and she doesnt answer then texts me later on saying this and that.

okay anyway, she sounded pretty excited when i answered and it kinda went like this:

me "heyyyy how you doin?"

her "hey .. im sorry i didnt talk to you all week but i was busy with work and studies"

me "hey thats okay i was pretty busy myself working and all.. pretty tired but yeah its good friday now so thats cool."

her "yeah thats good"

* so we basically spoke a little about how shes still working today (actually soon shes off to work) and stuff like that. she mentioned shes going to maybe see a movie today with the person shes looking after (she looks after people) and mentioned about how *we* were meant to see scream 4. i could tell she was waiting for me to arrange a date. there was a few slight silence seconds happening *

me "hmm theres a lot of good movies out right now. i really want to see fast 5. im thinking maybe we should change that scream 4 to fast 5."

her "yeah that sounds good i wanna see that. i think i can do that (cheeky saying)

me "cool cool. so what you doing tonight?" < oh oh

* i didnt make out everything here, she was mumbling or was lost for words *

her "yeah im _____ something something " < made out she was busy

* then i realized what my question sounded like to her and changed it up *

me "oh no no.. i mean like any plans for easter with your family or anything?"

her "oh yeah i had pancakes today blah blah blah"

dont remember much of the rest but somehow we got to talking about how shes free on monday cause its a public holiday or some crap.


me "yeah we havent done much of the day dates, we should hang out on monday and then see a movie later on."

her "yeah sounds good, okay"

the whole time she sounded happy to hear from me and i could sense she was happy in her voice. we talked about some other **** but then i decided im gonna end this now.

me "okay well ill talk to you on sunday about this and we will arrange things for monday."

her "okay!"

me "alright i will talk to you soon, see ya"

her "byeeee"

sounded a little dissapointed that i ended it fast. i felt she wanted to talk more. but i cant stand being on the phone long

now i have a few questions for you guys:

* i mentioned day date - do i still call it a date if its the 6th time we hang out? lol

* now this is the part where i was confused.. i didn't know how to set up a date with her over the phone without looking desperate. i really just wanted to see her tonight and almost just said "wanna do something tonight" but i didnt. i even thought maybe asking to hang out tomorrow night. but didnt either. i almost didnt set a date out at all because i was just speechless and didnt know when the fuk she was busy or not cause im not that busy and any day i could of probably hung out with her. i should of just said i was going out for the weekend with friends so i looked busy. god im a little pissed about that. i dont want her to think im home on the weekend. but i didnt really reveal my plans to her i just said im a little tired from working - well she already knows i went clubbing last weekend *

* another reason i hate phone calls .. i was thinking what to say at the same time talking to her. it's hard. the worse part was just trying to figure out a day to hook up without looking desperate or without her making me feel awkward by saying "im busy that day" - should i of just said something like "when are you free?" sounds stupid doesnt it?* god it feels like a damn driving test or something. one wrong thing and you can stuff it up or look like a fool. i always think too much :/

i feel stupid in a way that i didnt make the phone conversation better. i want to make her think of me because she cant wait to see me. that sort of thing. also, should i tell her about my weekend of clubbing and how i was dragged out to a strip club with friends cause i dont have much else to talk about apart from that. or maybe tell her im off to america in a couple months. that should get her eyes opened up.

UPDATE:

holy **** man what the fuk is going on today. im on fire. i got another fuking date tomorrow lunch time and another girl on sunday (possibly). now tomorrow this girl i just mainly think of as a chik friend. shes christian as well so i dont think anything will come of it since shes a "marriage then sex after kinda girl" but hey, its keeping me busy. i just said im goin to work and finish up after lunch so lets meet 1pm so she gave me her number and told me to text her when im at the station. she'll pick me up and we goin to have coffee. i know day dates arent good for hooking up but i know for a fact this girl wont put out so i think to myself fuk it ill just go out to keep myself busy. i dont mind hangin out with a girl and just talking.

 

[Jeffst1980]

okay, i didn't expect this but she just called. its 2pm here on friday (easter and everythings closed) i was caught off guard with this and not sure how i did. the call went for 5 minutes. i dont like talking much on the phone. so i looked at my phone and it was her calling and i was a little surprised. i almost didn't answer just to make it look like i was busy. but i answered it after a lot of rings. i probably should of called her back later but i don't like doing that with her because its really hard to get a hold of her especially in the afternoon and night and i hate calling and she doesnt answer then texts me later on saying this and that.

okay anyway, she sounded pretty excited when i answered and it kinda went like this:

me "heyyyy how you doin?"

her "hey .. im sorry i didnt talk to you all week but i was busy with work and studies"

me "hey thats okay i was pretty busy myself working and all.. pretty tired but yeah its good friday now so thats cool."

her "yeah thats good"

* so we basically spoke a little about how shes still working today (actually soon shes off to work) and stuff like that. she mentioned shes going to maybe see a movie today with the person shes looking after (she looks after people) and mentioned about how *we* were meant to see scream 4. i could tell she was waiting for me to arrange a date. there was a few slight silence seconds happening *

me "hmm theres a lot of good movies out right now. i really want to see fast 5. im thinking maybe we should change that scream 4 to fast 5."

her "yeah that sounds good i wanna see that. i think i can do that (cheeky saying)

me "cool cool. so what you doing tonight?" < oh oh

* i didnt make out everything here, she was mumbling or was lost for words *

her "yeah im _____ something something " < made out she was busy

* then i realized what my question sounded like to her and changed it up *

me "oh no no.. i mean like any plans for easter with your family or anything?"

her "oh yeah i had pancakes today blah blah blah"

dont remember much of the rest but somehow we got to talking about how shes free on monday cause its a public holiday or some crap.


me "yeah we havent done much of the day dates, we should hang out on monday and then see a movie later on."

her "yeah sounds good, okay"

the whole time she sounded happy to hear from me and i could sense she was happy in her voice. we talked about some other **** but then i decided im gonna end this now.

me "okay well ill talk to you on sunday about this and we will arrange things for monday."

her "okay!"

me "alright i will talk to you soon, see ya"

her "byeeee"

sounded a little dissapointed that i ended it fast. i felt she wanted to talk more. but i cant stand being on the phone long

This is what it looks like when the balance of power shifts. You played it cool by not chasing after her, and she felt the loss of attention HARD. She was so eager to be compliant that you could've suggested ANY date idea and she would've accepted. Good job resisting the urge to see her that night, though--that was the right move.

All you need to do to keep the power (and thus the girl) is to play it cool and back off the minute you feel her pulling away. Going on these dates with other women will help. DON'T tell her about them, and DON'T tell her about the strip club--that will not help you. Be mysterious and say NOTHING about where you've been when she was ignoring you.

 

[pipe007]

this is what I've done in the past to stop myself from texting a girl whenever I feel she is pulling back.

I delete her number. That way, it's really up to her if she want's to contact you, and if she doesn't, oh well, you won't really contact her either, and that will be the end of it.

so Delete that number, and wait lol. I just hope you don't know it by memory.

 

[LoneWolf]

this is what I've done in the past to stop myself from texting a girl whenever I feel she is pulling back.

I delete her number. That way, it's really up to her if she want's to contact you, and if she doesn't, oh well, you won't really contact her either, and that will be the end of it.

so Delete that number, and wait lol. I just hope you don't know it by memory.

thats actually a good idea haha.

 

[LoneWolf]

okay i called her earlier on because i told her i would today to arrange tomorrow. when i called she said she was actually just about to call me so i should of waited damn it

anyhow, only spoke for 2 mins, you know me, not too much a phone person. asked how she was blah blah. so i said lets meet here, so and so, about 1-2pm (we never really hung out during the day so why not, its nice n sunny tomorrow) play some arcades, maybe have somethin to eat, go see fast and the furious 5, then go hang out at mine later, to which she said sounds good.

now i got this little trick from some guy on this forum i dont remember who said it but i think it was igetit.. when i was saying bye i quickly said "oh hang on, forgot to tell you something...." she goes "whaaat?" i say "you gotta wear something sexy tomorrow" and i know i couldnt see her face but i just knew she was blushing with a few giggles.

i kinda felt dumb when i said that lol. but apparently they like that? anyway, now i gotta text girl 3 and cancel on her.