Why You Should NEVER Ask/Take Dating Advice From a Woman

or involve a woman in any way, shape, or form in your dating life. I just had to quote the following which makes it real simple (my commentary is below the quote).

Mike32ct said:

I agree that nice guys generally ARE being themselves. Like BB and Squirrels were getting at, women want guys to be themselves to make things easier for the women. She can then quickly determine if she is attracted to you if are real and not a faker.

But, they never said that being real guarantees attraction because it doesn't. See women don't want men to BECOME successful with dating/attraction. In their eyes, you are either naturally successful or you aren't and never will be. They just want to pigeon hole you as "nice guy loser" or "attractive guy.". They loath the idea that a guy could improve himself and change categories.

As a nice guy, have you ever suggested to a female friend that you want to work out, become more of a bad boy, work on your game, etc.? And what did she tell you?

She said something like, "Dont change. Don't be somebody you are not. Be yourself. You just haven't found the right girl yet.". She then texted some bad boy ex to come over and do her. Later that week, she tried to fix you up with her warpig friend that "would be perfect for you" lol.

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I have a friend who is a genuine nice person, masters degree, computer related job making 60k + a year. Yet when I asked one of my female friends to hook him up with some of her friends she look at me like if I had just asked her to kill a baby!

What did I do wrong? I was just trying to make my friend happy! Then I realized that women don't really want men to be successful with women or be happy with other women. I already knew the story but I never lived a real example for myself till that day. My friend is a decent looking guy too and yet I was seen as breaking some sort of code or something. It's not like her friends where church goers they were your average girls who would have been moving up to have gotten with my friend.

This is to add to the example in the quote by Mike where you can ask a woman what really attracts them and they will tell you some bs like "be yourself." But when has being yourself helped all the nice computer programmers who have high paying jobs yet can' get a girl to even look at them??

What men need to understand is that WOMEN DON'T WANT YOU TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN!

You need to implant the above in your head right now. I'm not telling you women are your enemy I'm just telling you that women rather have you be a nice guy failure all your life rather than James Bond. Women are attracted to James Bond they just don't want YOU TO BECOME JAMES BOND!

It doesn't matter if it's your best female friend. You tell your best female friend you are on sosuave trying to learn how to be better with women, pick up women and have lots of women and she will think you are doing something worse than clubbin a baby seal, but all you're really doing is trying to improve yourself and be successful with women.

Women cannot give out dating advice because they don't know what they want. This is because they are pure emotion. Any man able to trigger her emotions and push her buttons can conquer her. Women will say they want one thing but end up dating a man the total opposite. While men on the other hand we know what we want as what gets us going is physical appearance above all else.

Generalizing statements to include every woman on the planet is downright silly and ultimately counterproductive. Not all women are "pure emotion" or whatever, nor any of the other extreme stereotypes listed above.

However, I do agree that men should never take dating advice from women. I don't think women should take dating advice from men either.

The only dating "advice" I ever received from a woman that was spot-on was from a chick I met at a party who worked for some online dating site. I asked, "What's the secret to dating?" and she said, "Numbers, it's all a numbers game. Talk with a ton of women." And that is true.

Zarky said:

Generalizing statements to include every woman on the planet is downright silly and ultimately counterproductive. Not all women are "pure emotion" or whatever, nor any of the other extreme stereotypes listed above.

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I disagree. It's productive to act out things which trigger deep emotions in women which is WHAT'S MOST EXPERTS AND PUAS AGREE is what control attraction in women (emotion).

You are being counter productive by trying to make things more difficult than they really are.

And it is not a stereotype. Ugly men get hot women due to game which is all about triggering emotion in women, while ugly women can't do the same to a guy with movie star good looks.

Is there any kind of advices that a man should take from women?

Jitterbug said:

Is there any kind of advices that a man should take from women?

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On how to cook

Anything besides advice on women. Women don't mind you becoming a good cook or anything else but you becoming a "sexual threat, player or a heartbreaker" is a threat on the female power structure. You becoming full of masculine energy is a threat to their power structure.

Do you know the first woman to suppress your masculine energy? Your Mother!

Ever since we were children our masculine energy has been getting suppressed by none other than our mothers.

Whether it be to not do this, not to that, dress this way, don't go out with your friends stay inside, study this not what you want to do, stay in school don't go travel the world, bla bla bla bla. Ever since we were boys our mothers have been trying to suppress us from expressing our masculine energy. As men we were born to explore, to build, to discover, to conquer, to be free.

I have seen cases like this on sosuave and many might remember them as well. Stories of guys going from afc to dj, working out, improving themselves, getting bigger, getting more confident, adding C&F, and people (women specially) in their life noticing the change and reacting negatively TRYING TO KEEP YOU DOWN!

Why would people react negatively to you improving yourself? Because your masculine energy is a threat to their power structure!

To women it almost is like men have to be either naturally born attractive or nothing at all. They want and love all the attractive men the way they are but don't want you to become one yourself as they much rather have you be tame and feminized the way you are now.

So while women love James Bond they would never wish for all men to be James Bond. On the other hand if we could get a vote to get all women to be Natalie Portman, Jlo or whatever hot girl is the hottest now a days, who here would say NO?

f283000, I think this is a very bad thing to be trying to teach guys.

If you have attractive female friends, they can help you with your dating life in phenomenal ways. You can take them shopping with you and get some excellent advice on style and outer game. Simply by hanging out with them and talking about dating, you will increase your comfort level with being around attractive women and learn what some women think about different dating topics.

Truthfully, there are guys who don't know what they're doing that give bad advice too. There are also those guys who give good advice. The same is true with women that some give good advice and some give bad advice. The important thing to keep in mind is not to take anything too seriously, because in the end, you are the person giving yourself advice during the moment that it counts most.

It's true that women confuse what they "want" with what actually attracts them, but as a man you should know better when you feel that something is unnatural. My point is, Don't blame women for your mistakes when a few happen to give you bad advice that blows up in your face.

f283000 said:

On how to cook

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You also forgot clothes shopping.

Great post though.

Definitely worth a rep.

Goes into the "don't listen to what they say, watch what they do" theme.

Yes, the general rule is, never take advice from a woman about another woman.

The reason is that when she tells you "what women want", she is thinking of the love of her life (that drunk that dumped her long ago) and telling you what she wants HIM to do for HER, today. So she'll say "I want a man who is sensitive to my needs and who brings me flowers". Of course, if anyone else did that she'd laugh at him.

That said, if you are still friends with an ex who you have no feelings for, you can still get some good advice from them, sometimes.

Actually women can give either good or bad advice depending on what she says.

If she uses her personal experiences then it can be good.

However if she tells you you "should do *blah blah blah*" then it's probably what she thinks sounds sweet in her head, and it's no better than the advice you get off of AFC guys.

But yeah sometimes women's advice can help you more than anything else can.

runner83 said:

You also forgot clothes shopping.

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Don't think they're that good at it. Men who know fashion are often way better. My female friends come to me for fashion & styling advice. For all their time spent on shopping, they never stop to think about what goes with what and exactly why that's the case.

Just have a look at kinowear.com and tell me if you've ever met any woman who's at the same level with style for men.

As for cooking, most of the best chefs in the world are men. I'm saying this even though my mum is an amazing chef (by profession), but she really doesn't know how to teach it.

Seriously I can't think of anything I'd want to ask a woman for advice with (except for an excuse to get laid, e.g cooking, or clothes shopping).

This is the first time I actually agree with the OP lol.

He hit hte nail on the head.


My oneitis that brought me here.. she had friends, that were, pretty damn hot that I would have been more than happy to get with, would go out of her way to not let me meet them. There was one, that went to my church that I actually somewhat had a small crush on, i found out from her later that she was telling her that I was creepy and all this ****.. all while keeping me around.

see, i figured this out; it's a lose lose situation. The situation where, a woman becomes a real friend and just starts hooking you up with other women, just doesn't happen, by choice at least.


Becauseyou have three scenarios.


1. you are in fact a loser, and she isnt' going to hook you up with her friends
2. if you aren't a loser but you aren't date worthy, she feels that if she hooks you up with her firends, that is less time you get to spend around her / do stuff for her (this was the case with me and the oneitis)
3. she actually does like you but won't admit it, she isn't' going to watch you **** her friends

If you have attractive female friends, they can help you with your dating life in phenomenal ways. You can take them shopping with you and get some excellent advice on style and outer game. Simply by hanging out with them and talking about dating, you will increase your comfort level with being around attractive women and learn what some women think about different dating topics.

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You are mis understanding what the OP is saying. Every, well adjusted person should know women, even hang out with them. however, dont' confuse that, with them actually wanting them to see you succeed with the opposite sex, or being a real wingman or hooking you up with her super hot friend.


What you have to understand is even, the most platonic of male / female friendships.. she is still a woman. There is nothing wrong with having female friends. It is however, extremely counterproductive to depend on them for dating advice.

I remember what, 3 maybe 4 years ago I was spinning plates quite hard. I was friends with this girl, about 19, we weren't dating, i never made a move on her. she was cute, just not my type but we hung out. we would shoot the ****. one day we went out to eat, just chillin, she made sure, as i found out later, that we went out to eat where she knew a girl that liked me, and i kinda liked her, best friend work and made sure we were seen together. I called th girl i liked for like 2 weeks lol, we were damn near dating and she just disappeared, it took me 2 weeks to find out way. she has assumed i was cheating. I cleared it up, but, this girl did me no favors.


I know now why she did it. I don't even think she liked me to that point. But she wanted the option to like me if that makes sense. she knew if we started offically dating, the mid week lunches to red lobster were coming to a halt.





edit: damn 10 post rule, come on son.gif


I 'm going to put an end to this argument right now. some friends of ours, just got married. The husband was at work, she was over our house for dinner. in this time, her husband called her like 4 times lol. Dude is in LOVE lol like seriously. She is getting fustrated, it's not just now, it's everyday, he calls her non stop.

Now, DJ stuff asid, I know he's being needy. We are sitting at the dinner table and she is just venting. My finacee tells her, to let him know that you will answer the phone, but only when it suits you. I had to look at her like she was ****ing crazy. And this is my finacee.


that's ****ing horrible advice. You are taking a very simple issue, and compounding on it by adding your own issues. this is what the **** is wrong with women giving dating advice.


I told her look, while he might be a tad bit on the needy side, let's keep in mind, he's doing this because he loves you very much. Everything else can work itself out. Rather he cal you too much than to be out all night with god knows who right? So, why don't you (gasp) just tell him look, I know you love me and all, but this baby honestly is being counterproductive. He's trying, his efforts are just being put in the wrong place. Why would you compound on a honest good natured mistake by not answering the phone? that's ****ing stupid.


Yet, if you listen to women giving advice, this is the advice you would get. Women, do not even know how to deal with women lol

backbreaker said:

You are mis understanding what the OP is saying. Every, well adjusted person should know women, even hang out with them. however, dont' confuse that, with them actually wanting them to see you succeed with the opposite sex, or being a real wingman or hooking you up with her super hot friend.

What you have to understand is even, the most platonic of male / female friendships.. she is still a woman. There is nothing wrong with having female friends. It is however, extremely counterproductive to depend on them for dating advice.

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The OP is saying that he thinks "women don't want men to be successful with women." I think that's a pretty negative belief and I don't think it's fully true. If you're with a woman who wants you, there's a chance that she may be jealous and won't help you get other women, maybe even mislead you like you allegedly claim the woman in your story did. If you're with a woman who is actually your friend, then I don't see why she wouldn't want to help you out. Then again, he advice will depend on her knowledge of self and male to female attraction.

What you're saying is, because women are women, they don't want you to succeed with other women. A real persuasive argument if you ask me.

I'm in the Mood said:

The OP is saying that he thinks "women don't want men to be successful with women." I think that's a pretty negative belief and I don't think it's fully true. If you're with a woman who wants you, there's a chance that she may be jealous and won't help you get other women, maybe even mislead you like you allegedly claim the woman in your story did. If you're with a woman who is actually your friend, then I don't see why she wouldn't want to help you out. Then again, he advice will depend on her knowledge of self and male to female attraction.

What you're saying is, because women are women, they don't want you to succeed with other women. A real persuasive argument if you ask me.

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Let's say you have a platonic friend. She cares about you as a person, just doesn't want to date and/or f&ck you. Ok fine.

Let me put it this way. Yes she cares about you and in theory wants the best for you, but she's not interested in helping you become a player, get laid, or even become more attractive to women. I know that sounds negative and cynical. But understand that she isn't trying to be cruel. She doesn't want to help you for a few reasons:

1. Women consider you attractive or they don't. They generally do not believe a guy could change from loser to attractive guy. That's why friendzone is so hard to get out of. Once she determines you aren't f&ckable, SHE GIVES UP on you as a possible sexual partner not only for her but for most women. (Although she may genuinely hope there is that rare girl out there that will be drawn to you as you are.)

2. She's friends with you because you are LIKEABLE. The bad boys she f&cks, she may actually dislike them as people, but is still physically drawn to them. If she is friends with you, she doesn't want you to start acting arrogant and like a douche. That might get you laid with other girls, but it doesn't make a good friend.

PairPlusRoyalFlush said:

A TON of the DJ material here is based on what we think women SHOULD like(men of honor, integrity). The better material is that which looks at what they tend to ACTUALLY like.

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Men tend to give the most accurate descriptions of what women actually like. Women are more likely to spout b.s. on that subject.

Female friends are useless. There are lots of guys with many female friends but they still can't get laid. Women want guys to be desperate punked out vaginas who will do anything for them. If you were getting laid with different women you wouldn't be the male tampon friend of some woman. You wouldn't be willing to listen to her talk about her problems and get no sex in return. It wouldn't be worth your time. You'd be banging out one of the multiple vaginas on your shelf.

Women don't want you to have options, because more options means less horny suckers for them to take advantage of. They even hate it when you masturbate, because then you don't need them for sex anymore. If you don't need them for sex then they can't manipulate you. That is why they want to shut down pornography. I haven't seen any mens' groups protesting dildos and vibrators.

A lot of this thread is silly, but one thing I thought that was good to point out is that it's all about perspective. Womens advice on dating will work for women, for the most part who are choosers.

Advice like:
"It'll happen when the time is right"
Is true for THEM because guys will come up to them and if they are in a good mood or whatever then the interaction will go well and they can choose. If your a guy and you just wait around and do nothing to make yourself feel like more of a strong man and feel comfortable approaching new women, it's really bad advice because you won't meet anyone.

another one:

"Just be yourself"
If your the chooser girl, you don't HAVE to do anything to improve except maybe be hot and not a total byotch, which most women aren't naturally...so you can be honest and be yourself and not pretend. BUT if you are fearful and nice to compensate, then that is bad advice


Just wanted to point this out as it's not some grand conspiracy, it's just their point of view....

good advice for guys - "be strong for real, work on building your masculine essence and just take the girl"......work on relinquishing your fears around women and you will have massive success.

PairPlusRoyalFlush said:

I have met women through female friends. The trick is to act before the female friend can gossip too much about you.

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Exactly. Make your move while you have a relatively clean slate.

I'm in the Mood said:

The OP is saying that he thinks "women don't want men to be successful with women." I think that's a pretty negative belief and I don't think it's fully true.

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I guess we'll agree to disagree. You're 18, come back 10 years from now when you get some experience under your belt and then post a reply in this thread

Female friends are useless. There are lots of guys with many female friends but they still can't get laid. Women want guys to be desperate punked out vaginas who will do anything for them. If you were getting laid with different women you wouldn't be the male tampon friend of some woman. You wouldn't be willing to listen to her talk about her problems and get no sex in return. It wouldn't be worth your time. You'd be banging out one of the multiple vaginas on your shelf.

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GREAT POST! And if anyone doesn't believe this just ask a female friend of yours what makes a woman's pu$$y tingle. I'll bet she'll say "just be yourself" as she gives you a big fake smile, pats you on the back, and leaves in order to go see her bad boy bf who treats her like crap. Or she'll give you whatever other awful generic advice women give to men to keep them in the matrix and afc's forever.

If women wanted men to be successful with women then PUAS's would be out of business as women would be giving away their secrets themselves. It has taken men that have conquered hundreds and thousands of women for us to start to figure out what really makes their pu$$y tingle.

dude I was at the stage your at now at one point.... maybe you need to go through this or something, but your outlook does you no good w/ happiness in the long term, aka thinking girls all want you to be weak...they want you to be strong and despise weakness / relate to it and pity those that show it. It's ingrained in them to want strong men regardless of what you think they think you mind reader you.

f283000 said:

or involve a woman in any way, shape, or form in your dating life. I just had to quote the following which makes it real simple (my commentary is below the quote).

I have a friend who is a genuine nice person, masters degree, computer related job making 60k + a year. Yet when I asked one of my female friends to hook him up with some of her friends she look at me like if I had just asked her to kill a baby!

What did I do wrong? I was just trying to make my friend happy! Then I realized that women don't really want men to be successful with women or be happy with other women. I already knew the story but I never lived a real example for myself till that day. My friend is a decent looking guy too and yet I was seen as breaking some sort of code or something. It's not like her friends where church goers they were your average girls who would have been moving up to have gotten with my friend.

This is to add to the example in the quote by Mike where you can ask a woman what really attracts them and they will tell you some bs like "be yourself." But when has being yourself helped all the nice computer programmers who have high paying jobs yet can' get a girl to even look at them??

What men need to understand is that WOMEN DON'T WANT YOU TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN!

You need to implant the above in your head right now. I'm not telling you women are your enemy I'm just telling you that women rather have you be a nice guy failure all your life rather than James Bond. Women are attracted to James Bond they just don't want YOU TO BECOME JAMES BOND!

It doesn't matter if it's your best female friend. You tell your best female friend you are on sosuave trying to learn how to be better with women, pick up women and have lots of women and she will think you are doing something worse than clubbin a baby seal, but all you're really doing is trying to improve yourself and be successful with women.

Women cannot give out dating advice because they don't know what they want. This is because they are pure emotion. Any man able to trigger her emotions and push her buttons can conquer her. Women will say they want one thing but end up dating a man the total opposite. While men on the other hand we know what we want as what gets us going is physical appearance above all else.

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yo my man this post is pure money

This isn't true always, it depends on the dynamics of the friendship. If the women are only acquaintances, or not really close friends, then I'd say yeah, don't take their advice.

However, if the girl is a REALLY good friend that you can trust then it's not an issue, or at least in one of my experiences it's not an issue. Way back in the day I had a female friend who was truly a great friend, she even went so far as to let me stay at her place rent free when I was too broke to afford my own place. Anyway, when we'd go out, she'd act as a wing for me and usually when she worked with me I was most likely going to get laid. She even taught me a lot about the way women think, and what to do to be more successful at getting them. She was basically a one in a million type of female friend.