Zero Females

[Canadian_Man]

7 works as well.
Great, so I’ll see you there?
Yes. See ya
Perfect / Thumb up emoji / etc

Great, thank you for the lesson.

 

[member160292]

Here's an example I kept from a few years ago when I was far less rusty, far better at teasing & building anticipation.

Maybe you can learn something from it.

It doesn't take long to set up a date via OLD, not two days, and she was excited/attracted enough not to flake.

There was a purpose to every message I sent, from the first one until the end: to get her out to the tea cafe while peaking her interest.

The date went well, we made our way to a nearby park afterwards (with swings and the such), fooled around a bit there, then, made it back to my place (a short walk away), where it got more intimate (but didn't hook up that night).

I don't believe I texted her much at all leading up to the date after it was set, unless she texted me first.

This was OkCupid or another OLD app.

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Field Report Time?

 

[Canadian_Man]

Field Report Time?

Well, I may have forgotten some of the details by now.

Here's the gist:
- After the first date, she texts me about our "intimate time", reading between the lines she was saying she wanted to slow that part down.
- She said sometime during the first or third that "you're way more experienced than I am", which was the second time I've had a woman say that in a year, and I take it to mean that I knew how to escalate things sexually more in comparison to what she's used to
- Had a second date, took her out to another little hidden gem of the city, in a wooded area near one of the beaches, that overlooks the city skyline. We sat on the rocks, watched the sunset, made out, etc.. On the way back, found a public outdoors tent, went in there for privacy, made out again, and I more aggressive with it, leading her to various parts of the tent, getting her to sit on a post in the middle of the tent, etc., afterwards we head to public transit and go our separate ways
- Setting up the third date via text, she stopped replying part way through making the plans, something like 4 or 5 days later I re-engage her, she apologizes for not responding then agrees to the next date.
- She comes to my place, we cook together, on and off the entire time we were making out, then, we hook up. After an hour or so break, we hook up again. When she left, and I walked her to the public transit, she was starting to gush over me a bit (which she hadn't done much up to this point).
- She became colder again the next day via text.
- She comes over again for a fourth date, I think we ordered take out this time, and we hooked up again. This time she was in a bit of a rush to leave afterwards, didn't want to stay and hang out too long
- For the fifth date, she told me beforehand that was on her period and not feeling well, wanted to stay in, so, we hung out at my place (she still lived with her parents), no hooking up. It was nice for the most part, except she didn't really like me touching her too much (we did make out a bit). I think she was either sensitive being on her period, or didn't trust that I wouldn't try to seduce her while she was on her period
- After the fifth date, we're texting a bit (she initiated it), I offer the sixth date. She disappears, replies a day or so later, ending it between us

I believe where I went wrong was: I didn't really connect with her emotionally, I became predictable, and I was too focused on getting her on dates.

During the dates, I was 'present' and they were all generally good experiences.
She was a nice woman, though I wasn't too into her by the time it was over.

 

[member160292]

Appreciate the write up! Interesting you need to find a balance that keeps her chasing, but at the same time not giving off the I’m too busy for you vibe. Also, I’m not sure if I should invest time to understand any woman on an emotional level. What does that mean?! If every woman has a different emotional criteria, seems like a failed effort. Maybe more experienced folks can chime in here…

 

[Canadian_Man]

Appreciate the write up!

My pleasure.

Interesting you need to find a balance that keeps her chasing, but at the same time not giving off the I’m too busy for you vibe.

Something like this, I think, yup.
Was also just not reading the room too well, it was a digression/change of topic from whatever we were talking about at the time when I offered the sixth date.

Also, I’m not sure if I should invest time to understand any woman on an emotional level. What does that mean?! If every woman has a different emotional criteria, seems like a failed effort.

Well, there's two parts to it.
I've never really articulated this before, so bare with me.
Might not have the idea fully flushed out.

(1) For building/maintaining attraction:

(2) For relationship building, when it gets further along.

 

[SmoothSmooth]

Here's an example I kept from a few years ago when I was far less rusty, far better at teasing & building anticipation.

Maybe you can learn something from it.

It doesn't take long to set up a date via OLD, not two days, and she was excited/attracted enough not to flake.

There was a purpose to every message I sent, from the first one until the end: to get her out to the tea cafe while peaking her interest.

The date went well, we made our way to a nearby park afterwards (with swings and the such), fooled around a bit there, then, made it back to my place (a short walk away), where it got more intimate (but didn't hook up that night).

I don't believe I texted her much at all leading up to the date after it was set, unless she texted me first.

This was OkCupid or another OLD app.

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this is the type of PUA material that people need to STOP circulating around, because youre hurting your own and other peoples chances of doing well with women. it worked ONCE. that means NOTHING. i guarantee if you tried that tea-coffee games 50 other times, it would be unlikely to replicate same results. after all, theres a reason why you screenshotted the convo and saved it many years later. its a RARE occurance.
you can see clearly from her first reply she was already likely DTF anyway by sending like 5 messages in a row in reply to your corny opener. maybe she was just horny and highly attracted to your looks. but im telling you, you probably could have got this chick out with a more simple, straightforward approach.
you did some good things in the convo by making her work for you, no doubt, but the truth is 'game' has very little to do with a womans decision to meet a man for a date. its about her perception of a mans smv, and the only way u can help that via text is by seeming relaxed, non needy, replying late and escalating smoothly.
when you go outside and see people on dates with highly attractive women - how many of them got there using corny lines and playing guessing games online before the date?

a seduction technique/approach should not be endorsed until it has been consistently used to replicate solid results, over and over

 

[MatureDJ]

You constantly need to put yourself out there, it can get very exhausting

Aaron Clarey did a video on how much of a waste of resources are devoted towards OLD:

 

[Canadian_Man]

i guarantee if you tried that tea-coffee games 50 other times, it would be unlikely to replicate same results. after all, theres a reason why you screenshotted the convo and saved it many years later. its a RARE occurance.

That's one way to look at it, if you assume that I tried it multiple times.
Which I didn't.

She was the second last woman I remember contacting by OLD prior to the COVID lockdowns.
The last woman I remember from OLD, if I tried it on her, yes, it didn't work.
Those circumstances were different though, she was very depressed, and wanted a deep emotional conversation ASAP, to fill her emotional void.

By the time of the lockdowns, I had taken a break from dating, and moved out of the city, meaning there was no point in trying to repeat it without the destination I had in mind before.

Nowadays, I would only try it if I built up my confidence again in that type of thing.
As I've said elsewhere, I'm rusty.

Not to say you aren't right about your overall message in testing it out more or general thoughts on texting 'game'.

 

[James Cruse]

Man. Dating is **** .

7 Days , 4 dates all cancelled the day before .

I can understand why people are going back pill.

Women are so picky with nothing to offer
It is ridiculous.

I am in the best shape , have my own home and garden and still not getting anything.

Maybe it is my location, but I feel so tired of dating

To clarify, you met several women by (in person) cold approach, then got four phone numbers, asked them to meet you via text for a date, they agreed to the date via text (they texted back) and then no show’ed on the date itself?

 

[European-DJ]

Here's an example I kept from a few years ago when I was far less rusty, far better at teasing & building anticipation.

Maybe you can learn something from it.

It doesn't take long to set up a date via OLD, not two days, and she was excited/attracted enough not to flake.

There was a purpose to every message I sent, from the first one until the end: to get her out to the tea cafe while peaking her interest.

The date went well, we made our way to a nearby park afterwards (with swings and the such), fooled around a bit there, then, made it back to my place (a short walk away), where it got more intimate (but didn't hook up that night).

I don't believe I texted her much at all leading up to the date after it was set, unless she texted me first.

This was OkCupid or another OLD app.

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A bit too long for my taste, but I really enjoyed it. Apart from being too many texts this sums up my approach to OLD

 

[Bandolero]

To clarify, you met several women by (in person) cold approach, then got four phone numbers, asked them to meet you via text for a date, they agreed to the date via text (they texted back) and then no show’ed on the date itself?

No. These were all from OLD

 

[James Cruse]

No. These were all from OLD

If these were all online dates - now you know why it’s losing prospect for men.

Approach women in person. I know so many good looking guys with game who get barely any play on dating apps but as soon as they approach girls in person, they get a plethora of dates and female options.

Cold approach - during the day or nightclubs/bars. You’ll get so much better results because women can see your attractive behaviour, which is what they really want to see anyway.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It sounded like she was coming to me, I'm not quite sure what you mean in this case.

What would a brief example of order/compliance look like in this context?



I tend to try to keep chit-chat to a minimum as well.

It's more than I usually do, from what I remember I was testing out a new idea for setting the date without having her flake.

Turned out well, that time.

I'm usually more chatty and it works out well for me. I would bet the majority of people will lose more women by trying to "ghost until the date" than not.

For me personally, my flakes pretty much disappeared when I stopped that. It's a nonsense rule...one that people talk about that doesn't work for the majority of people, or actually limits their ability to meet women and get laid.

Guys do dumb stuff and then blame the women for it. SMFH

 

[user252009]

Man. Dating is **** .

7 Days , 4 dates all cancelled the day before .

I can understand why people are going back pill.

Women are so picky with nothing to offer
It is ridiculous.

I am in the best shape , have my own home and garden and still not getting anything.

Maybe it is my location, but I feel so tired of dating

Where are you in Germany? I'm here as well

 

[user252009]

Here's an example I kept from a few years ago when I was far less rusty, far better at teasing & building anticipation.

Maybe you can learn something from it.

It doesn't take long to set up a date via OLD, not two days, and she was excited/attracted enough not to flake.

There was a purpose to every message I sent, from the first one until the end: to get her out to the tea cafe while peaking her interest.

The date went well, we made our way to a nearby park afterwards (with swings and the such), fooled around a bit there, then, made it back to my place (a short walk away), where it got more intimate (but didn't hook up that night).

I don't believe I texted her much at all leading up to the date after it was set, unless she texted me first.

This was OkCupid or another OLD app.

Ew I stepped in cringe

 

[Bandolero]

Where are you in Germany? I'm here as well

Hessen , 30 km from Marburg . In the middle of nowhere

 

[user252009]

Hessen , 30 km from Marburg . In the middle of nowhere

That's not too far from my area actually, I live more to the west. How's the scene there? I guess not urban at all.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Well, I may have forgotten some of the details by now.

Here's the gist:
- After the first date, she texts me about our "intimate time", reading between the lines she was saying she wanted to slow that part down.
- She said sometime during the first or third that "you're way more experienced than I am", which was the second time I've had a woman say that in a year, and I take it to mean that I knew how to escalate things sexually more in comparison to what she's used to
- Had a second date, took her out to another little hidden gem of the city, in a wooded area near one of the beaches, that overlooks the city skyline. We sat on the rocks, watched the sunset, made out, etc.. On the way back, found a public outdoors tent, went in there for privacy, made out again, and I more aggressive with it, leading her to various parts of the tent, getting her to sit on a post in the middle of the tent, etc., afterwards we head to public transit and go our separate ways
- Setting up the third date via text, she stopped replying part way through making the plans, something like 4 or 5 days later I re-engage her, she apologizes for not responding then agrees to the next date.
- She comes to my place, we cook together, on and off the entire time we were making out, then, we hook up. After an hour or so break, we hook up again. When she left, and I walked her to the public transit, she was starting to gush over me a bit (which she hadn't done much up to this point).
- She became colder again the next day via text.
- She comes over again for a fourth date, I think we ordered take out this time, and we hooked up again. This time she was in a bit of a rush to leave afterwards, didn't want to stay and hang out too long
- For the fifth date, she told me beforehand that was on her period and not feeling well, wanted to stay in, so, we hung out at my place (she still lived with her parents), no hooking up. It was nice for the most part, except she didn't really like me touching her too much (we did make out a bit). I think she was either sensitive being on her period, or didn't trust that I wouldn't try to seduce her while she was on her period
- After the fifth date, we're texting a bit (she initiated it), I offer the sixth date. She disappears, replies a day or so later, ending it between us

I believe where I went wrong was: I didn't really connect with her emotionally, I became predictable, and I was too focused on getting her on dates.

During the dates, I was 'present' and they were all generally good experiences.
She was a nice woman, though I wasn't too into her by the time it was over.

She liked you, but you messed this up. Too much texting, pursuing, and not enough space. You were all over her. She needs some time between dates to let her feelings about you marinate. You burned this one out my friend.