I've had some success getting numbers from girl's I'm interested in, but I have never in my life made the transition to a full on relationship, long term or otherwise. Sure, the "dj way" is to not put all your eggs in one basket and date/fvck as many chicks as possible. But I would really like a girl I could call my own that I can have a healthy relationship with.
I met a girl last weekend (8 1/2 easy) and asked for her number, but she said give me yours. I thought it was a polite no thank you, as I have gotten before, but she called back 3 days later and pretty much asked me for a date! Our first date went well: pretty constant flow of conversation, somewhat similar interests, smiling, laughing, sharing stories, etc. On more than one occasion after the date she said she had a good time. 2nd date we went to a movie, and ate quicklike at a food spot cuz she had to work. Conversation not quite as flowing necessarily (direct result of my subtle subconscious fears), but nothing too bad. Had a somewhat akward kiss in the car, but still she made a point of saying she had a good time.
I was extremely happy at this point, but then yesterday my thinking shifted into a negative spin and I'm overanalyzing every little detail perceiving things on our date that didn't go as good as they could have as worse than I should. See my above kiss analysis: she most likely doesn't think it was as akward as I'm making it out to be, or sh1t, perhaps even feels partially responsible due to the circumstances (quick drop off car make out almost in public).
I know that I'm obsessing and putting way too much pressure on myself, as I have with girls in the past. I even know that you attract what you fear. But one mighty precursor to confidence is past successes, which I basically have none of. I have more or less only had random hookups my whole life.
I'm going to have my 3rd date with this girl wednesday, but it's not a full on 1 on 1 date, we're gonna see her friends band play. I don't want to come on too strong, but I have paid for half-3/4's of our activities and feel it's pretty much time to take her home and get some.
But I don't feel like I have created a real spark with her, or done anything strongly non-AFC with her and I'm fearing failure. I'm wondering what my friends will think of me if I scare this girl off.
Has anyone in here ever been in my shoes with no experience but somewhat at the cusp of sealing the deal and have any advice? I know it's just about positive thinking/being happy, and I'm not looking for some cheesy techniques or lines to use, but I'm having a tough time fully taming the elusive beast of fear and know that if I scare this girl away, I will be sink into a deep depression. It's fear man FVCK!!!! MUST CRUSH WUSS-LIKE TENDENCIES!!!
p.s my last date I had was akward and the girl never called back and I sunk into a nasty weird funk on and off for practically 2 months.
I met a girl last weekend (8 1/2 easy) and asked for her number, but she said give me yours. I thought it was a polite no thank you, as I have gotten before, but she called back 3 days later and pretty much asked me for a date! Our first date went well: pretty constant flow of conversation, somewhat similar interests, smiling, laughing, sharing stories, etc. On more than one occasion after the date she said she had a good time. 2nd date we went to a movie, and ate quicklike at a food spot cuz she had to work. Conversation not quite as flowing necessarily (direct result of my subtle subconscious fears), but nothing too bad. Had a somewhat akward kiss in the car, but still she made a point of saying she had a good time.
I was extremely happy at this point, but then yesterday my thinking shifted into a negative spin and I'm overanalyzing every little detail perceiving things on our date that didn't go as good as they could have as worse than I should. See my above kiss analysis: she most likely doesn't think it was as akward as I'm making it out to be, or sh1t, perhaps even feels partially responsible due to the circumstances (quick drop off car make out almost in public).
I know that I'm obsessing and putting way too much pressure on myself, as I have with girls in the past. I even know that you attract what you fear. But one mighty precursor to confidence is past successes, which I basically have none of. I have more or less only had random hookups my whole life.
I'm going to have my 3rd date with this girl wednesday, but it's not a full on 1 on 1 date, we're gonna see her friends band play. I don't want to come on too strong, but I have paid for half-3/4's of our activities and feel it's pretty much time to take her home and get some.
But I don't feel like I have created a real spark with her, or done anything strongly non-AFC with her and I'm fearing failure. I'm wondering what my friends will think of me if I scare this girl off.
Has anyone in here ever been in my shoes with no experience but somewhat at the cusp of sealing the deal and have any advice? I know it's just about positive thinking/being happy, and I'm not looking for some cheesy techniques or lines to use, but I'm having a tough time fully taming the elusive beast of fear and know that if I scare this girl away, I will be sink into a deep depression. It's fear man FVCK!!!! MUST CRUSH WUSS-LIKE TENDENCIES!!!
p.s my last date I had was akward and the girl never called back and I sunk into a nasty weird funk on and off for practically 2 months.
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