Your Recommendation

[iveyleeger]

Would you spend $25 on a wink?

I'm asking b/c I got a wink from a woman who actually looks very interesting -- a rare occurence for me (both a wink, a good photo, and well-written text).

So I could wink back for free. But when I've done that I've never gotten an email after that. I assume that all self-respecting women expect the man to pay for the subscription, and send an email reply, right? To wink, and then mail back would be weak, right?

If this were a standard dating site I wouldn't bother. A wink, so what. But it's actually an alumni networking thing, and while the population is much lower, the quality is much higher.

Chew that over, then consider a few more things:

* She is 30, and says Yes to wanting kids. Desparate biological clock. Easier or harder to seduce?

* Says in her profile, "friends first." Uptight?

* Doesn't live in my city, says she is looking for quality more than convenience

* Took her photo herself. This indicates she doesn't have any friends, or done anything recently where someone would take a pic of her, right?

Overall, my feeling is she's a mercenary who wants to land a hubby with a nice pedigree (fancy college, etc.) You all agree? If so, any potential here at all for something short-term (I don't want marriage or kids, just a fun summer).

Note: Keep in mind, I have never got a hot chick off the internet, and I would be willing to spend the money to check this off my lifetime To Do list. I'm just trying to figure out whether this is worth the investment or not. She looks like an HB7 to me, 2 points above my normal operating range.

Thanks for all comments!

 

[scordate]

hi, and welcome to the wonderfull world of online dating

i have in another thread posted a rather lenghty message about my experiences with online dating, so I wont repeat myself here

I think you are asking the wrong question; should I dish out 25 $ to be able to send this chick an email ?

when you ask as that, I would say; course not

in stead go down to the local whatever and buy drinks to the best looking girl, when you have spent 25 $ you have achieved exactly the same or perhaps better ! ( wink wink )

but if you want to spend the 25 $ anyway my advice is to pay dating service and then send email out to every single woman there that even remotely tickles your fancy

meet them for coffe; inexpensive short first simple dates, and see what happens

but what you are doing bye asking your question is preparing yourself for a heavy dose of oneitis !

and I would never make it too complicated by asking myself all these questions; what if...., is she... based on her written profile alone

who cares who took her photo as long as its not her current boyfriend, huh !

go out there and enjoy all the posibilities

/ scordate

 

[al77]

Originally posted by scordate


when you ask as that, I would say; course not

but if you want to spend the 25 $ anyway my advice is to pay dating service and then send email out to every single woman there that even remotely tickles your fancy
meet them for coffe; inexpensive short first simple dates, and see what happens

and I would never make it too complicated by asking myself all these questions; what if...., is she... based on her written profile alone
who cares who took her photo as long as its not her current boyfriend, huh !

Absolutely right! Dont focus on just one girl, ie. it is better to buy subscription and send many emails.. if you concetrate on just one girl you automatically have high expectations about her...
It is a number game really.

And yes, I would not pay too much attention to what she wrote: usually women write whatever they can come up with at the moment. What if she has a bad day?

Online is somehwat similar to CA - you have to gain MANY successful CA in order to get a date. Same with online - you have to email many women in order to get a date with one of them.

I'd add $45, buy a year subscription for $70 and get your patience ready: you should be willing to email a lot of women and take "silent" rejections from them.
Benefits are obvious: dont have to go out and face real rejections.

 

[Paradox]

That's 2 on the money posts for you scordate. Your thoughts on online dating were superb. Keep up the good helpful posts. We appreciate it.

 

[iveyleeger]

Thanks for the feedback guys, very good points.

 

[Ever onward]

Hey, sounds to me like your on Yahoo Personals...

First, has seen your pic? Just curious....

Second, PM and I can tell you how to get her contact info without paying a cent. That is if you are using Yahoo Personals.

 

[scordate]

just wanted to comment on al77 remarks;

no i would actually not recommend a years subscription although you save some money

several reasons;
ok (my scottish ancestry) why pay for more than you are sure to use; i would say 3 months tops
even get it by month

some services show for how long you have been a member; some girls might be relustant to date someone who has been online for the past 3 years ?

i believe that the most common thing is to get 1 - 3 months and then re-enlist with a new profile name, so that all the new come'rs dont see you as the perpetual dater

and finally; the romantic in me; if you get a girl that you are going exclusive with she most certainly will want to see your profile being de-activated ! and then you have lost your money !
( scottish mode out )

PS.
date I had tuesday; she let it slip that she had previously been on the service under another name ! she very quickly turned to another subject all-together ! so women can play that game too !

/ scordate

 

[al77]

Originally posted by scordate
no i would actually not recommend a years subscription although you save some money

several reasons;
1. why pay for more than you are sure to use; i would say 3 months tops even get it by month

2. some services show for how long you have been a member; some girls might be relustant to date someone who has been online for the past 3 years ?

3. i believe that the most common thing is to get 1 - 3 months and then re-enlist with a new profile name, so that all the new come'rs dont see you as the perpetual dater

4. and finally; the romantic in me; if you get a girl that you are going exclusive with she most certainly will want to see your profile being de-activated ! and then you have lost your money !
( scottish mode out )

1. Example from mach.com 1 month - $30, 3 months - $17 per month, six months - $13, I signed up for $6 per month for a full year. I like $6 much better than $17.

2. Thats crazy.. thats bad. I guess match.com doesnt have that anyway.

3. What's the deal with it? Just change your user name - match allows that.

4. In 3 months you are not going to find sombody to be exclusive with unless you are a rock star. Online market is tough, not easier than doing CA.

5. In month you will develop so much exclusivity that she will have guts to tell you "take off your profile"? No, it doesnt work that fast...

What happen is most guys try personals for say 3 months and got very discouraged: it is not easy, women are fat and not friendly.... So it requires a lot of time to find sombody decent and compatible through online. Certainly much more than 3 months.

 

[al77]

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