SnatchJP
Senior Don Juan
Two simple tips that I've figured over the course of time and experience. (The experience meaning the experience of suddenly trying to write an inspirational post at 2:00 AM while half asleep. Wish me luck boys!)
Do you like spicy food? Can you handle really spicy stuff? Thai peppers, extra hot salsa, wasabi and the like? If you can't let me tell you how. don't deny the fact that its spicy and that it hurts, accept the pain. It's there. So what? It still tastes good. If you try to deny that its spicy or fight the pain, chances are you'll lose. (Unless its not all that painful)
Theres a slightly similar way to boost your general confidence and make you seem more... "genuine". It's REALLY simple there are two parts. First: <If you're feeling a certain way, accept it.> If you're pissed, admit it to yourself, don't pretend to yourself that nothing is wrong, because something obviously is. If you are attracted to a fine looking young lady, admit it to yourself, don't try to cover it up. If you are scared about something, admit it to yourself. Supressing it only hightens your fear until you finally have to admit it, and then you will be WAY more scared than you were originally.
Once you've accomplished this, move on to the next part: Now that you know how you're feeling: <Do something about it.> If you're pissed, blow off some steam somehow or try to find something to calm yourself down. This only really works after you realise that you are in fact angry. If you find a girl attractive, start thinking of way to stike up a convo and get her number. If you are scared of something, treat it like you would spicy food. Yes it hurts. I admit it. So what? True courage isn't not being scared, it's being scared sh*tless and doing it anyway. So accept your fear and either find a way to deal with it or just make your move anyway.
The reason the first part is important is that if you deny your feelings, you have to pretend to the world that you're feeling something different. Thats lying. Not that thats not useful sometimes, but remember, the fewer lies you tell, the less you have to remember and the less you have to explain. Also if you admit to yourself how you feel, you learn a lot about yourself by seeing what things makes you feel what emetions, and that info can be VERY useful.
The second part is important because if you just accept your feelings and surrender to them, your feelings are controlling you. That just won't do, now will it? You have to accept, then you must act on the information you have accepted. In this way, you control your feelings even while accepting them. They become allies and tools to befriend and use rather than enemies to fight.
Do you like spicy food? Can you handle really spicy stuff? Thai peppers, extra hot salsa, wasabi and the like? If you can't let me tell you how. don't deny the fact that its spicy and that it hurts, accept the pain. It's there. So what? It still tastes good. If you try to deny that its spicy or fight the pain, chances are you'll lose. (Unless its not all that painful)
Theres a slightly similar way to boost your general confidence and make you seem more... "genuine". It's REALLY simple there are two parts. First: <If you're feeling a certain way, accept it.> If you're pissed, admit it to yourself, don't pretend to yourself that nothing is wrong, because something obviously is. If you are attracted to a fine looking young lady, admit it to yourself, don't try to cover it up. If you are scared about something, admit it to yourself. Supressing it only hightens your fear until you finally have to admit it, and then you will be WAY more scared than you were originally.
Once you've accomplished this, move on to the next part: Now that you know how you're feeling: <Do something about it.> If you're pissed, blow off some steam somehow or try to find something to calm yourself down. This only really works after you realise that you are in fact angry. If you find a girl attractive, start thinking of way to stike up a convo and get her number. If you are scared of something, treat it like you would spicy food. Yes it hurts. I admit it. So what? True courage isn't not being scared, it's being scared sh*tless and doing it anyway. So accept your fear and either find a way to deal with it or just make your move anyway.
The reason the first part is important is that if you deny your feelings, you have to pretend to the world that you're feeling something different. Thats lying. Not that thats not useful sometimes, but remember, the fewer lies you tell, the less you have to remember and the less you have to explain. Also if you admit to yourself how you feel, you learn a lot about yourself by seeing what things makes you feel what emetions, and that info can be VERY useful.
The second part is important because if you just accept your feelings and surrender to them, your feelings are controlling you. That just won't do, now will it? You have to accept, then you must act on the information you have accepted. In this way, you control your feelings even while accepting them. They become allies and tools to befriend and use rather than enemies to fight.