Young Gurl on MySpace Situation....

[gixxer]

Been talking to a 20 y/o on myspace for a few days now.

Long story short:

She contacted me first - a good indicator of decent IL

We set up a TENTATIVE date by email which she later cancelled for an OK reason IMHO She gave me her number at the same time

We played phone tag a little and didn't get to talk

I saw her online the next day and emailed her saying - I'm home now, call me. She called in about 2 minutes

We talked for a while and I said "so what about getting together" She said work was crazy this coming week but the next week would be good - she could even take a half day from work so we could hang out

Now, on to my question: My analysis of this situation is that this girl has OK interest level of about 60-65% I suspect she is sort of flakey but still up for hanging out with me if we can get our schedules to click. What I am concerned about is getting into a pattern of me asking her to get together and her being busy - legitimate or otherwise. I feel that I can only ask her out once more and if she's busy any more asking out will put me in AFC land.

I understand that I need to hang back now and sort of let her come to me but how far back and can I rely on a 20 y/o to pursue? I'm assuming that the only way to raise her IL and get a date is to hang back and let challenge do the work for me.

So let me know how best to play this one guys.

Thanks

gixx

 

[scordate]

been there done that :-(

based on my experience the only ones that have a legitimate reason for cancelling / setting dates way ahead in the future are single mums

all others can and will tweak their busy schedule if you are hot enough; like Brad Pitt would have gotten the how about next week line ?

but I've heard it myself so many times

setting a date more than 5 - 7 days ahead is not good; she'll forget it and meet another guy she rather wants to meet

if you get a date next week you should make sure to keep in touch in a NOT NEEDY kinda way

keep her smiling, bust her and get her to look forward to your date; anticipation is powerfull

tease her mind and get her thinking about how its going to be meeting you


trying to set a date and finding out that you are already in next +2 weeks is murder

i always let it fade out
be longer to reply to her mails etc etc
just appear not interested

like the old joke;
she says; my place or your place
you reply; if you want to discuss it, forget it !

you are busy and can squeeze her in ( pun intended ) but you dont wanna sit there trying to syncronize calenders !

i would email her about twice during the next week saying; 'hey I am going down to 'whatever' this evening - wanna join me' even 'some friends are havin a party tomorrow - wanna join me ?'

if you dont get get any positive feedback; next her

you are history anyway

if she wants to set a date for week +2 next, i think its perfectly all right to react like Bogey in Casablanca when asked by Yvette;

what are you doing tonite ?

reply: i never plan that far ahead

hey, who amongst us plan 2 weeks ahead for a simple date ?

/ scordate

 

[gixxer]

To be fair here, she lives 2 hours away right now but is moving to my area next month. I assume she was trying to meet a few "friends" here so she didn't have to be alone once she moved.

I basically asked her to take a 2 hour drive right after work to meet up with me and go for a motorcycle ride. And she only accepted tentatively because of the distance and timing.

Normally I would consider a broken date to be an automatic next, but this situation is a bit different in my opinion AND she called me the next day when I emailed her and told her to.

I'm basically going to hang back and make any date offers fit the "I'm doing this anyway do you want to do it with me" frame

gixx

 

[ghostin]

I say keep talking to her a little. Make her laugh and enjoy the little time you give her. Then in a week or so, ask her to hang out again

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

GIXX: Bear in mind that the one disadvantage MySpace has in this respect is that it voraciously feeds women's attention needs. Understand that if this girl is attractive enough to get your attention there's most likely 3 dozen other guys doing exactly the same thing you are and she's weighing options. You're obviously not at the top of the list for her, but you might be a suitable alternate warming up in her bullpen.

I'll agree with SCORDATE, let her cool off for a bit and see if she pursues you. If you've got the idea that her IL is 60-65% you may want to consider a few more irons in your MySpace fire, while she decides what to do. I'm sure all of the male attention an immature 20 y.o. girl gets on MySpace is overwhelming, let her sort it out for a while.