WTF is going on with this LJBF

[al77]

I had some odd experiences: we talked online, met, I figured out it is not going to work out.. "no chemistry". Next day I sent her a letter ".... didn't work out. sorry..Good luck"
Seem a normal situation so far?
... she sent an email back with "... blah blah.. let got to YYY together..." i.e. she wants LBJF after teh fact that it was not going to work out??
I met several (3 at least) women who did sent that strange email. All were 24+.

It is not a big deal of course...but I am curious about your opinion: what are those chick think?
Are they just seeking a companionship? Do they still have hope "it will work out"? What do you think?

 

[Ricky]

Maybe they are trying to save face with you?

 

[al77]

Originally posted by Ricky
Maybe they are trying to save face with you?

Interesting. Maybe, I dont know...

Let just do this imaginary reversed experiment: She (not me) send me an email "Sorry it didn't work out". How would I feel and what I would do?

Probably say nothing in return and click NEXT
Or if she was too polite.. maybe I would send back "....And good luck to you too!".

But why would I want to tell her LBJF and invite her to YYYY?? I know it didn't work out...
Is it some odd female thinking that drive sthem to say LBJF and go out to YYYY, i.e. they were specific about where to go.

 

[darth yoda]

I hope she's not crazy...

What a coincidence, I just had this same situation last week with an online chick I went on a date with. After the date I sent an email saying she's not my type, I'm not feeling it, etc...

She responds by saying thanks for the honest email and asks to meet me the next week so we can "talk about it".

She didn't get the hint, and kept calling me and emailing me even after I told her it wasn't gonna work out. After a month of ignoring her (absolutely NO contact, yet she still called/emailed me weekly), I decided that I had to let her know rather harshly to leave me alone.

Some women are desperate, overly emotional, delusional, and can't take a hint.

Hopefully al77, you don't have a basketcase on your hands.

 

[al77]

Re: I hope she's not crazy...

Originally posted by darth yoda
She responds by saying thanks for the honest email and asks to meet me the next week so we can "talk about it".

She didn't get the hint, and kept calling me and emailing me even after I told her it wasn't gonna work out. After a month of ignoring her (absolutely NO contact, yet she still called/emailed me weekly), I decided that I had to let her know rather harshly to leave me alone.

Some women are desperate, overly emotional, delusional, and can't take a hint.

darth yoda,

I have seen females interested enough to stalk me a bit, but after I told them directly "There is no "chiemistry", I think it is not going to work out" they stopped, except those really odd cases when she seems understood, but still suggests "Lets go to YYYY".

I think you case is a bit different: you didn't tell her clearly enough and she kept stalking you. Or she was completely nuts and didn't read/understand your email.

What is most likely they are despearte etc...but they have profiles in internet, and some of those desperate chicks have quite decent pics. That means they do get some responses from guys. Still they want to go out with a guy EVEN if they knew it didn't work out?
That confuses me.

Here is a guess: maybe... they wanted to retaliate a bit? Since I told her first "it didn't work out" she took it as a rejection, and wanted to show me that I am pathetic enough to accept her idea of going out with a chick whom I am not interested in?

 

[brat-buster]

This is precisely why I use the:

"If NOTHING ELSE...........you might make an interesting/cute friend" line when telling them to join up with me somewhere.

This takes the LJBF card away from them and they have to start convincing you that the two of you should be more than just friends!


It's called "stealing their frame" It works great cuz then they are trying to get you to be more than just friends. just my .02

 

[al77]

Originally posted by brat-buster

"If NOTHING ELSE...........you might make an interesting/cute friend" line when telling them to join up with me somewhere.

This takes the LJBF card away from them and they have to start convincing you that the two of you should be more than just friends!

It works great cuz then they are trying to get you to be more than just friends. just my .02

I think it is true for very hot chicks who used to getting lots of attention, and sure they can see this as a challenge.

Last time I met a couple of HB9 (in my own scale).. one was not confident at all, worked as a teacher with predominantly female colleagues and obviously didn't have tons of attention from guys.

The other one was simply very spoiled and could not any convo: ie. she was too lazy even to talk...

Less cute and less bright chicks maybe would not even get the hidden meaning in "you might make an interesting/cute friend". When they hear "friend" they may mistakenly think with the first word they can associate it with in this context "AFC".

So in my opinion it could be a a bit dangerous path with average chicks, unless you aim at really hot, really dynamic chicks who are actively dating. Probably you do, it it may work for you.

By the way, those gals who wanted me to go out with them even after we figured out it iwas not going anywhere - they were below average. 3-4 maybe. HB9 simply ran away without saying anything.

 

[NewMan]

we talked online,

the majority of these chicks have nothing going on.

Why do you think they meet people on-line?

So if they meet a half decent guy - they will latch on....

I wouldn't waste my time.

 

[Oblivious]

Well what does that say about him then? Wasn't he online?

 

[al77]

Originally posted by MacDiddy
I think your Nexting took them by surprised and 9 times out of 10, their prides would have been hurt...

Being emotional creatures that they are, they need to re-assure themselves that there is nothing wrong with them... They will do this by reinitiating contact of some sort with you and play you like a fool till they are satisfied that it is you and not them...

MacDiddy,

Thanks! I feel this is very true...This is very insightful post to me.
You are good at it, man!

 

[al77]

Originally posted by NewMan
the majority of these chicks have nothing going on.
Why do you think they meet people on-line?
So if they meet a half decent guy - they will latch on....

NewMan, that is not really true: there are all kind of chicks online exctly as you may find in real life.

Why they are online? When you are 30+, all your friends are married and you move to a new town, work 9 to 5... how would they meet quality men? Bars do not count. Friends are married, coworkers do not qualify...

In fact, I would say they are more picky online than in real life.
Men "approach" women online very often, she doesn't need to go out to be approached. It is going on 24/7. So she doesn value online dudes much - there will be new ones...
In real world women know that decent guys do not approach them every day - they value them more than "from" online.

So online is just a very different medium to meet women. Somwhat better, somewhat worse than real world. Just different.

 

[NewMan]

I disagree.

From the female perspective - if your hot, got your sh#t together - your going to get many, many oportunities in the "Real World" - let's say.

Even moving to a new town.... Hot chick's are not going to be alone very long - that's a fact.

How many stories are there of guy's meeting women, only to find out that their picture is old, or they have put on 40 lbs - or that their face was cute, but the body (not shown on the piccy) was fvcked?

Are there exceptions? sure. But I would say that the majority - are a waste of time for the DJ.

 

[NewMan]

Well what does that say about him then? Wasn't he online?

A guy is looking to fvck. On-line chicks are easy - it's numbers. You can sut in your own home and propersition literally 100's of women in your area.

Out of 500 women, let's say to get 2% in the sack - that's 10 chicks right there.

guys will do almost anything if they think they'll get laid.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by NewMan

From the female perspective - if your hot, got your sh#t together - your going to get many, many oportunities in the "Real World" - let's say.

Even moving to a new town.... Hot chick's are not going to be alone very long - that's a fact.

It depends. It is true in general, though when you apply real world conditions...I have met a couple of hot teachers, 8-9.
They were really hot, bu they have mostly female colleages, both were 32+ so most of their friends are married... where would she meet men?
She works 9-5, drives home and probably sit in from of TV. What options she has? Bars? Clubs? Yoga & knitting classes? Or go to a baseball game alone and get bored to death?

If she go out - yes, she will be approached a lot. But with whom she would go out? They are getting old, friends are married... a decent option she has is simply visiting all kinds of store alone...
So they think online is a decent alternative.

 

[NewMan]

probably sit in from of TV. What options she has? Bars? Clubs? Yoga & knitting classes? Or go to a baseball game alone and get bored to death?

these are the exact women to avoid (for me)....

this is LIFE we are talking about - and if she doesn't know how to develop a quality life for herself - she's going to depend on a guy?

 

[al77]

Originally posted by NewMan
these are the exact women to avoid (for me)....

Probably you have a good reason for that.
But to me it doesn't matter if she has 200 friends and visited 100 places per week. I rather care if she is interesting to talk to - even in from of TV at home.
If she has a busy social life... that is not a turn on, it just says she is busy, not clingy.