Would a church-going woman be best for me?

[LonesomeLoser]

I am a virgin who has never had a relationship. And I know at my age a woman is not going to like that because apparently all a woman worries about is how well a guy can f###. But what some people tell me is maybe I might want to try meeting a woman at church. I am not religious at all, I have very vague beliefs that there maybe might be something out there, maybe, but don't really give a f### because it won't matter until I'm dead.

But I would like to find a physically attractive woman who will not be concerned that I'm not good looking myself, only make 27K a year, am not a social person at all beside wanting a girlfriend, and am in my mid-30s and a virgin. A woman who will not mind that I am not worldly and experienced (not just about sex but life in general), ESPECIALLY not mind that I am very clingy and needing a lot of reassurance that she loves me. And I can go to church and go through the motions and say the right things so she thinks I believe like she does. I don't believe in much of anything except just getting through each day, so pretending I believe in something shouldn't be too hard. I know there would be the problem that a religious woman will probably want children and I don't want or like kids, because I don't want the responsibility and they would take away from my "me time", and I need a LOT of "me time". But if she really loves me she will not push me to have kids if I tell her no.

So basically, what do you all think about me trying to find a woman in church?

 

[j0n024]

Maybe you can relax and just have fun with your life...I mean why do you have to conform to something you really dont beleive in just to get with some girl. I say just have fun with your life and leave it at that.

 

[Bible_Belt]

ESPECIALLY not mind that I am very clingy and needing a lot of reassurance that she loves me.

which is why you're a virgin, provided this is not a troll thread

 

[NSUballer]

You shouldnt pretend to be something youre not. eventually shell know. why dont you try actually listening to the preacher? It will do you alot of good if you actually do believe in something. God is very real, i promise. I think it might be a sign for you.

A person that believes in nothing will fall for anything...

 

[Bible_Belt]

Hey NSUballer, I hope the OP was not a bait for a debate over religion; I suspect it was. Religion threads get closed, so before that happens, let me say that I agree with everything you said.

 

[NSUballer]

no i dont think it was bait. i believe this man really does have a spiritual dilemma in his life. no one mentioned any religion. he should follow his heart. god does speak to people. but not in the sense that most people can fathom. i hope that he finds the right path.....at least i know im not the only one here who believes.

 

[NSUballer]

life is not about just having fun. and it isnt all about you.

 

[dietzcoi]

Don't know if this is a troll or not, but his problem is not whether to find religion or not!

OP: You need a lot of work. Do you think a religious woman is any different from other women in wanting a good MAN as opposed to a self-centered, asocial, whining clingy AFC?

First read OUR bible here and the rest of the posts and then begin to improve your lifestyle.

You will need a complete change of your approach to living, if you hope to have success.

If your post was a singles ad you would not get even one response.

Dietzcoi

 

[LonesomeLoser]

ESPECIALLY not mind that I am very clingy and needing a lot of reassurance that she loves me.

which is why you're a virgin, provided this is not a troll thread

Well I understand that that's why I'm a virgin. But my original question was, would a "nice church girl" have different requirements than the scantily-clad young things at the clubs who want looks and/or money? I mean, because the girls you meet at church are going to be all wholesome and not wordly. I already realize that I'm a loser with nothing to offer a woman besides the fact that I'm "nice" (which basically just means that I'd never hit or cheat on her), and am looking for a woman who is at least a 7/10 in the looks department who will be okay with that. And I'm wondering if I'd have any better luck if I look at church

 

[PrinceBeavis]

OP: You need a lot of work. Do you think a religious woman is any different from other women in wanting a good MAN as opposed to a self-centered, asocial, whining clingy AFC?

^^^THAT'S your answer, RIGHT THERE.^^^

 

[speakeasy]

I am a virgin who has never had a relationship. And I know at my age a woman is not going to like that because apparently all a woman worries about is how well a guy can f###. But what some people tell me is maybe I might want to try meeting a woman at church. I am not religious at all, I have very vague beliefs that there maybe might be something out there, maybe, but don't really give a f### because it won't matter until I'm dead.

But I would like to find a physically attractive woman who will not be concerned that I'm not good looking myself, only make 27K a year, am not a social person at all beside wanting a girlfriend, and am in my mid-30s and a virgin. A woman who will not mind that I am not worldly and experienced (not just about sex but life in general), ESPECIALLY not mind that I am very clingy and needing a lot of reassurance that she loves me. And I can go to church and go through the motions and say the right things so she thinks I believe like she does. I don't believe in much of anything except just getting through each day, so pretending I believe in something shouldn't be too hard. I know there would be the problem that a religious woman will probably want children and I don't want or like kids, because I don't want the responsibility and they would take away from my "me time", and I need a LOT of "me time". But if she really loves me she will not push me to have kids if I tell her no.

So basically, what do you all think about me trying to find a woman in church?

The only difference a church vs non-church girl would bring is that church girl may be looking more for marriage and family than just casual dating and have more traditional values. But other than that. No, it's not going to be any different. From what you've said, you need to change yourself completely from the ground up. If you are in your mid-30s, you might be past the point of no return already, but there's no harm in trying.

First off, look at your username. You have low self-esteem, you are in your 30s and make the money most people are making bagging groceries in high school. What on earth have you done in all this time to still be making so little money? You say you want a physically attractive woman who will not care if you are not physically attractive? WTF??? Sure, I won't be holding my breath for that one! Get your own sh*t together, then worry about finding a quality woman. Quality attracts quality. I'd say before you even worry about the DJ stuff, you need to find some self-worth, at least some degree of social skills(you don't have to be as good a conversationalist as Jay Leno, but you should at least be able to engage people in interesting conversation when need be). Find some passions, do some soul searching, whatever. But like I said, if you're just getting started at your mid 30s, you've got a hell of a task in front you. Best of luck in your journey!

 

[potato]

God is very real, i promise.

In your fantasy world of make believe.

A person that believes in nothing will fall for anything...

Actually quite the opposite. Religious folk bought into the fears, and thus bought a lot of useless crap (ie generators and the like) surrounding the so-called y2k bug, far more than non-religious folk. Likewise, overwhelmingly religious folk bought into the lies of George Bush in the lead up to the invasion of Iraq. Atheists overwhelmingly did not fall for these. Clearly it is the people who believe in god are the ones that fall for anything, not those who do not believe.

 

[PrinceBeavis]

In your fantasy world of make believe.

Actually quite the opposite. Religious folk bought into the fears, and thus bought a lot of useless crap (ie generators and the like) surrounding the so-called y2k bug, far more than non-religious folk. Likewise, overwhelmingly religious folk bought into the lies of George Bush in the lead up to the invasion of Iraq. Atheists overwhelmingly did not fall for these. Clearly it is the people who believe in god are the ones that fall for anything, not those who do not believe.

...And that's just your opinion too. Either way, neither one of you have any business posting a religious debate here. You're both off-topic.

 

[WaRpEd]

What's with the religious debate? He didn't ask "Is god real" He asked "What do you all think about me trying to find a woman in church" answer his question and quit clogging up the forum.

And speaking from personal experience, unless your curious about going to church....NO!!!! Of course it's whatever floats YOUR boat, do what you gotta do man.

 

[Romualdo Cavalieri]

You have got to seriously improve your inner game! Why do you blame yourself in such a destructive way? Ok, you are in your mid 30s, still virgin and without any previous relationship, what's wrong? I see two possibilities:

- Your present status was determined by your choices and values.
- You are a victim of circustamces and it was not a choice.

In the former, probably you have had your own reasons, your considerations about life and this is far better than being leaded by inertia like most people do and they know nothing of their lives, nor even where and why. Folk with an active sexual life still get depressed, are unsatisfied with their own lives so that's not a big deal. Are you with me?

If instead it's true the latter, why don't you plan a great revenge? You have to develop the skills and you can if it's what you really want. Can you imagine becoming better than any average guy who started f**ing at 15yo ? (and they are often one-itis driven and submissive to their woman like most men) Great, uh? It'll be even greater when you'll make it real.

Please, do yourself a favor. Use your brain just for what it was engineered to: find solutions to your problems, and stop torturing your existence with commiseration. I suggest you to start from this book:

"Psycho-Cybernetics, A New Way to Get More Living Out of Life" by Maxwell Maltz. ISBN 9780879801274

Do a google search for it. I think it can really add value to your life. Another great book you should read is "A mens liberation guide to woman" by Sam Fryman (freely available from the author's web site) from which i take a little boost for your self-esteem from chapter twenty:

"Many famous and brilliant men of the past, such as Van Gogh, Isaac Newton and Hans Christian Andersen, never married, so we are looking at a problem which has been around for hundreds of years in Western society, long before the current feminist era, but has now, for reasons it will become clear, got a whole lot worse.

For the problem modern men in particular have, especially brave, intelligent and handsome ones, is that they feel that the indignity of the modern dating process is unacceptable, due to the humiliating treatment that women are now allowed – unlike their better behaved mothers and grandmothers – to inflict upon men, apparently with little or no remorse."

Good luck and keep in touch.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

I am a virgin who has never had a relationship. And I know at my age a woman is not going to like that because apparently all a woman worries about is how well a guy can f###. But what some people tell me is maybe I might want to try meeting a woman at church. I am not religious at all, I have very vague beliefs that there maybe might be something out there, maybe, but don't really give a f### because it won't matter until I'm dead.

Actually, where you end up after you are dead is determined with what you do with Christ, whether you receive Him as your Savior or if you die in your sins. If I were to ask you, where are you going after you die, are you sure your name is in the Lamb's book of life when it's called out on judgement day - can you say, yes it is, I'm right with God? If not, then waiting until you die may be too late as you end up in hell.

Please seriously reconsider. I know that you may not have the conviction of the Spirit of God in your life, and what I'm saying may fall into deaf ears or you may not see the relevance now. I can say that it's God that really enlightens you to see these things and to understand, He is the purpose of everything.

But I would like to find a physically attractive woman who will not be concerned that I'm not good looking myself, only make 27K a year, am not a social person at all beside wanting a girlfriend, and am in my mid-30s and a virgin.

It seems to me that you are 'love-shy'.
http://www.love-shy.com/Gilmartin/Dr._Brian_G._Gilmartin-Shyness_&_Love-(onepage).pdf

I suggest you read that link and let me know if any of it connects with you. I have found that I connect with it, (although I dont like it's non-scientific hocus pocus stuff in the middle).

You are looking for a AP4 girl - even in a church that's going to be difficult and you'll likely get discouraged and conclude all girls are the same in church or out of church. Would suggest you practise on AP1 and AP2 and make a few friends with girls of lower attraction powers, just so that you are less anxious around women as a whole, then you can venture to AP3 and AP4 and being yourself around them.

It's difficult or impossible to be yourself around an AP4 as you'll be totally limerant on her and put her ona pedistle.

A woman who will not mind that I am not worldly and experienced (not just about sex but life in general), ESPECIALLY not mind that I am very clingy and needing a lot of reassurance that she loves me.

Again, you are setting yourself up to fail if you go after an AP4 off the bat. Try lower AP's first until you are comfortable dealing with girls. Think about it, you are going to church - to worship God, or to worship an AP4? If you are secure in the faith, then you shouldn't need allot of resurrance of love since it's part of the Christian belief that Jesus loves you unconditionally so you shouldn't need other people's unconditional love.

And I can go to church and go through the motions and say the right things so she thinks I believe like she does. I don't believe in much of anything except just getting through each day, so pretending I believe in something shouldn't be too hard. I know there would be the problem that a religious woman will probably want children and I don't want or like kids, because I don't want the responsibility and they would take away from my "me time", and I need a LOT of "me time". But if she really loves me she will not push me to have kids if I tell her no.

So basically, what do you all think about me trying to find a woman in church?

Well, portray yourself as someone who is trying to grow in the faith as opposed to pretending, and that wants to know what it is that they have that makes them different and how you can get it yourself that way you would get a more sympathetic connection as compared to someone who is faking this whole thing.

 

[Rebound Material]

.....at least i know im not the only one here who believes.

That makes 3 of us so far...

 

[PrinceBeavis]

.....at least i know im not the only one here who trolls.

That makes 3 of us so far...

...