Work stresses

[LimeSlush]

Hey all,

This site has been an unbelievable resource for me over the years for generally the best advice and support so of course here I am. I figured I would ask here and see if anyone has any input.
Last year I went from the trades, I have my welding ticket and did that for about 11 years. I recently changed to a job in insurance due to the economy and not really wanting to be up to my elbows in mud and snow every day, and have been having some mental roadblocks and wondering if anyone has some tips.

I keep fairly active, I lift weights about 4 times a week, I play the odd hockey game here and there, and eat fairly decent. I am good for probably 1-2 drinks per day on average and I do smoke weed pretty much daily. What my issue seems to be is I cannot leave work at work. I am pretty good at my job, Im always on top of my work and I have for the most part really good interactions with people. But when I make a mistake on a file, when someone is chewing my head off for no reason etc, I ruminate on it for the rest of the day, while driving home, and ill think about it periodically unless its pretty bad I might dwell on it all night. I know this is not a healthy way of dealing with work but that it can be common.
I want to gain control over my mind so that this isnt as bad. I realize its going to take work and time, but I also cant keep stewing on mistakes or bad interactions every time they happen. I have really great supervisors and all these expectations are my own, I expect perfection from myself when it comes to work its just my nature. I have never ever been pulled into a meeting over performance, its never been about any of the work expectations. They even tell me to relax and that im in a far better position than the majority of my coworkers. The other part is when someone is freaking out at me, I can logically say it isnt anything to do with ME, that its just the situation, but it will still bother me and stick in my head.

I do not want to go to the Dr and just get put on some anxiety medication or anything like that. I want to try to deal with it myself directly before turning to that as the solution. Thanks in advance for any help.

 

[Spaz]

Have a mantra and keep saying it over and over again.

A mantra is a mental armor that I often used when I was younger until it's now very much part of my psych.

I hv mantras from my childhood, in my professional life for meetings etc and also in other areas more personal areas.

I'll give an example of a mantra I used before heading off into a "warlike" board meeting;

As I walk in the valley of the shadow of death, I'll fear no evil nor fear itself for I am the meanest motherfvcker in the valley.

The rest that I have is in my native tongue and if translated into English wouldn't suit nor convey it's proper context as it was meant, so find something similar, make it ur own and wear that as an armor.

Remember, every single man has fear but how he handles it and ultimately overcomes it 2 his benefit is what makes him standout from the rest of his peers.

Good luck.

 

[switch7]

I'll give an example of a mantra I used before heading off into a "warlike" board meeting;

As I walk in the valley of the shadow of death, I'll fear no evil nor fear itself for I am the meanest motherfvcker in the valley.

LMAO

Hey all,

This site has been an unbelievable resource for me over the years for generally the best advice and support so of course here I am. I figured I would ask here and see if anyone has any input.
Last year I went from the trades, I have my welding ticket and did that for about 11 years. I recently changed to a job in insurance due to the economy and not really wanting to be up to my elbows in mud and snow every day, and have been having some mental roadblocks and wondering if anyone has some tips.

I keep fairly active, I lift weights about 4 times a week, I play the odd hockey game here and there, and eat fairly decent. I am good for probably 1-2 drinks per day on average and I do smoke weed pretty much daily. What my issue seems to be is I cannot leave work at work. I am pretty good at my job, Im always on top of my work and I have for the most part really good interactions with people. But when I make a mistake on a file, when someone is chewing my head off for no reason etc, I ruminate on it for the rest of the day, while driving home, and ill think about it periodically unless its pretty bad I might dwell on it all night. I know this is not a healthy way of dealing with work but that it can be common.
I want to gain control over my mind so that this isnt as bad. I realize its going to take work and time, but I also cant keep stewing on mistakes or bad interactions every time they happen. I have really great supervisors and all these expectations are my own, I expect perfection from myself when it comes to work its just my nature. I have never ever been pulled into a meeting over performance, its never been about any of the work expectations. They even tell me to relax and that im in a far better position than the majority of my coworkers. The other part is when someone is freaking out at me, I can logically say it isnt anything to do with ME, that its just the situation, but it will still bother me and stick in my head.

I do not want to go to the Dr and just get put on some anxiety medication or anything like that. I want to try to deal with it myself directly before turning to that as the solution. Thanks in advance for any help.

Firstly I would say stop drinking and smoking weed everyday. That behaviour does not promote good mental health and may be having an affect on you. Stop for a few months and see if there is any difference in your anxiety/stress levels.

Secondly I would grab yourself a copy this book : https://www.amazon.co.uk/Overcoming...ifically-behavioural-techniques/dp/1845297423

and study it. It's a very easy read and there are some exercises to follow. It's been shown that people who are 'perfectionists' although usually good workers, are more efficient when they stop trying to make everything so perfect. That includes interactions with others.

 

[LimeSlush]

That's great, I'm just trying to figure out how to over come the mental block right now for myself.

Yeah I was thinking the weed and alcohol probably don't help much. I'll check into that book thanks for the replies!