women who rarely climax

[warpy]

hey, well lately i have been talking to quite a few gals, it seems that the majority of them have a hard time, their partners cant get them satisfied or for some unknown physical or emotional reason they cant get satisfied from sex, the thing is that if they do it on their own they can probably do the did in 2 minutes. some of them actually accept the situation as is without hope of salvation, knowing they will always satisfy their partner and the only the only way for them is alone.

my ex gf's did not have this situation but for some odd reason this seem to be very common.

so what am i realy asking here? i am sure there a whole load of info available on this subject, not just technical howtos on how to give them a massage and go down on them before the act, just like the dj voodoo there must be some kind of voodoo to make sure that when you are with a woman who has this problem, you'll be the one she remembers for all eternity. the one who satisfied her in a way that no one else could.

okay folks, time to share the knowledge... meaning links, info and personal experience.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Best bet is to date a woman who can consistantly give herself an orgasm. They are the ones who know their bodies well enough be able to work with you on doing what's necessary to get them off. FYI, not all women can have or know how to give themselves orgasms.

 

[Mayfly]

80 % of women climax from oral sex


Think about it.

 

[warpy]

its like saying "live with it", isnt there a part of you who wants to be the best lover there is, make every woman drool when they look at you, make them gossip on how you were the only one who made them break the vicious cycle.

giving them the best intercourse sex of their life plus the added bonus of getting off at the end of it. doesnt that make you the ultimate DJ?

i am sure that there are ways, physical and psychological ways, tricks of the trade that people are unaware of.

anyone else ?

 

[KarmaSutra]

Getting a woman to orgasmic valhalla involves a relatively easy equation:

99% Mental stimulation
1% The tip of your tongue doing counter clockwise swirls on her li'l nubbin until your face resembles a Krispy Kream donut ( damn, I wonder if the Hot/Fresh sign is on at this time o' the morning . . .).

 

[Nasman]

A girl I was fvcking could never climax not even alone because she was on antideppressants.

Another girl I was ****ing couldn't climax because of sexual abuse as a child.

So woman that are normal mentally won't have a problem. its the wack jobs that have problems climaxing.

Ur best bet is to learn how to eat pyssy and foreplay.

 

[Latinoman]

Could be a number of reasons

1- Too young and still learning their bodies
2- Medications
3- Man inability to satisfy her
4- Too much masturbation with a dildo (no man can compete with that)
5- Some kind of traumatic mental stuff (e.g. rape, etc.)
6- Or the EXTREMELY RARE case of inability to orgasm (VERY RARE)


If she can masturbate and orgasm during masturbation...then you can eliminate #6.

#1 have hopes.

#2 too.

#3 is typically what happens with younger woman as they tend to date inexperience men. And it is the most common cause.

#4 is also a typical case (no much different to the case of men constantly masturbating and then having problems ejaculating).

 

[warpy]

its good to see that list latino man, lets talk about a specific girl now,
she is 25, knows her body very well, not on medication, no dildo in her past life, i will ask about any abuse in her life, but i realy want to believe that never happened, 6 is out of the question, let me add a few more bits of info.
her man get satisfy her, but she keeps insisting its her, because of past relations with guys who couldnt do anything about it.

you were talking about 99% mental stimulation, lets talk business, do you guys have some heavy duty recommendations here ?

 

[Vulpine]

Women tend to lose focus. They think about all sorts of goofy stuff besides the "task at hand" which is getting off.

"Do I smell?"
"I wish he'd do that harder."
"Did I feed the cat before I left?"

There is no magic saying that snaps them into paying attention, but I have had many instances where women claim to not be able to get off with guys... than proceed to have crazy orgasms with me. I tend to think it's B.S., but keep an open mind. For the "tough nuts", I pay a little extra attention. I have an evening that I start off with:

V: "I need you to pay attention. Pay attention to how this stuff FEELS and try to not think about anything else but the feeling. Do you think you can do that?"

If she agrees to try, start off with normal kissing stuff. Stop around the neck and ask what she's thinking about. Insist at about that time that she relax and pay attention to the feeling. Ensure her that everything is fine, and you are enjoying yourself. Then start over.

Pay attention to her reactions from the chest to waist area. You'll know when she stops paying attention to the feeling and is thinking about something else. Without speaking, at this point I'll apply an inappropriate stimulus, such as a flick, slap, or a pinch and gauge their reaction. If they complain, remind them sternly: "Pay attention!" Typically, they will sigh and relax again. Back up to a previously "worked" area and begin again.

Eventually, if things are going well and they are paying attention, they'll slip into an "orgasmic hypnosis" of sorts. Their body will override any thoughts they try to have. Usually they will already be in this trance before you get to the waist.

Another thing I do to use as an indicator is hold one of their hands. If you can't tell where they are at, quickly raise their hand up and drop it. If it falls to the bed, they are good and relaxed. If they keep it up in the air, tell them to relax and pay attention again.

If women are fully tuned-in to what you are doing, when you get to their crotch they should feel breath/warmth inputs without any touch, and they will react to them accordingly. If not, remind them again and back up and proceed again. Don't be afraid to roll them over on their stomachs and work over their backs.

From my experience, women who have difficulty getting off with a partner have trust issues, lack of experience, have been raped, or... have grown up riding horses. The horseback riding tends to overstimulate their crotch and their body naturally "tunes out" stimulus over time. Essentially, their brains "disconnect" from that area and you must make their brains focus on re-establishing the connection again. When women masturbate, they are forced to focus on what they are doing, because they are the ones doing it. Which is why they claim to be able to "O" by themselves.

I get a laugh out of women who blame men: it's their fault they can't effectively pay attention, not any guy's. Oh, and I tend to avoid women who boast that they love horseback riding. Then again, I laugh at women when they fake it.

 

[ElChoclo]

Vulpine makes some good points. You need to give yourself some advantages. It helps if you can find a situation or technique which has particular arousal significance. Eg some location which she finds exciting or some circumstance. Fatigue is very bad, such as tiredness from work or a late night.


One technique which I have used for an extreme case, is guided imagery. I tell her to close her eyes and visualise being in a parked car. (Which is something she finds arousing) I then manually stimulate her whilst she visualises this scene. When she reaches a satisfactory level of arousal, I proceed to intercourse. Admittedly, this level of complication detracts from uninhibited enjoyment for you.

You would need to work out what she finds to be a stimulating situation first, however. In view of the extra trouble I can readily understand why someone might prefer the type who can achieve one easily.

 

[warpy]

vulpine, great points there. definitely worth a test, i'll see if i can get someone to test this on.

anyone else out there who wants to share their own experience with us, teach us something about the fair kind or how to make the difficult ones get off?


on the note of things being too difficult, sometimes for us (men) its too easy, i can usually get my batteries fully charged and stay up for hours, the thing is when its overheated it can be faster than intended, i have heard some people mention the use of a rubber will dampen the area, whacking one or two in the morning will make sure you can be incharge in the session later on.
i hope you guys will not flame this, but in a case when you are with two women, you need to play the game full on and make sure they are yours for the taking another time.

do you have any advice on this situation? then feel free to share.

cheers

 

[BobFuest]

love.
I have had quite a few growing up that had past truamas or even one who had so much sex while doing extacsy that she was de-sensitized or it was psychological. In any case, a key factor with some of these women was just having a really strong connection with them. Once you established that the rest was easy. My longest gf of 5 years was an "hard orgasm". She couldnt get off unless she was really in love with the guy. I mean she liked sex and like getting fukked but for her to orgasm she had to have that connection.

 

[Albion4]

I've known and been with quite a few women who rarely climax. Women are not like men, they don't have to get off to enjoy sex. Stop worrying about it and you'll enjoy sex a lot better. Now, if she makes mention to the fact that she never gets off with you, then you should worry about it.

-Al

 

[realsmoothie]

I've known and been with quite a few women who rarely climax. Women are not like men, they don't have to get off to enjoy sex. Stop worrying about it and you'll enjoy sex a lot better. Now, if she makes mention to the fact that she never gets off with you, then you should worry about it.

-Al

Good points, all.

I've realized that SO MANY women have sex issues that they can't relax enough to come. That's why I take a ridiculous amount of time with foreplay... and I don't mean squeezing their boobs. I mean rubbing their back, kissing long and slow, kissing their face and neck, nibbling their earlobe (HUGE) and so on. By the time you get all the way to their love-button she's just aching for it.

Oh, and in my personal experience, it's a LOT easier to make a woman come with your hand than your mouth. Think about it... can you write or paint with your tongue? Not too easily.

 

[Slickster]

It has been my experience that a woman's orgasm is more of a mental thing than it is physical.

In many cases women just aren't comfortable enough with themselves or their lover to reach that mental state required for orgasm.

You can do everything to try and make her feel comfortable with you but if she's not comfortable with herself then its not going to happen. She may also be comfortable with herself when she's alone but not with you present.

I've had gf's claim that they never really knew how to have an orgasm before they slept with me. They even claim that they always "thought" they were having orgasms in the past. It seems that after sleeping with me for awhile they eventually became comfortable enough with themselves and just let themselves go.

So it makes it very difficult for a guy who really wants to be a good lover when his gf is maybe faking orgasms or may not even know what the hell a real orgasm is!!

One method that has worked for me with "orgasm impaired" women.

-She lies on her back.
-You lie on your side next to her.
-The leg (her leg)closest to you is raised up towards your chest.
-Maybe even hanging over your shoulder if its comfortable for her. (Everybody and every body is different )
-You penetrate her from this position
-While penetrating you use your hand to rub her cl!t.

This method assumes that she is the type who can get herself off manually.
Better yet, you learn how to get her off manually and then try this method.

Once you get this method working well....

- Just before she orgasms reach underneath with your other hand and just barely insert your finger or thumb in her bum.

This method has been very sucessful for me with many different women who have had troubles orgasming.

That being said it doesn't work with all of them. I've been with some women who can only orgasm if both of their legs are straight and pretty much closed. If their legs are spread open or bent too much at the knees it won't happen for them.

For the most part though I think it just takes time and experimentation to find what works for each woman. Once she becomes comfortable then she may be open to other methods.

Have fun learning.

 

[warpy]

albion, "stop worrying and have fun?", you know what.. for me fun is when i you see the joy and the appreciation after they get off from ME. as if her dreams had come true. considering the fact that its so common of them to have problems, if you have the ability to to make all of those difficult ones get off, they will come back begging for more.

slicksters, good call on the back and front trick. now about the the legs open or close, straight or relaxed, that is so true its one of those things you dont realy pay attention to. now thats real voodoo in my book.

thinking about the legs position. i am wondering if arms positions or head position, body bend or straight or anything else realy is of real importance as much as the legs. is there anything else that is worth taking care of that is not in the sexual zone.

keep these advices coming.. cheers.

 

[Aaron B]

Best bet is to date a woman who can consistantly give herself an orgasm. They are the ones who know their bodies well enough be able to work with you on doing what's necessary to get them off. FYI, not all women can have or know how to give themselves orgasms.

I totally agree.

My wife is able to get off in less than 5 minutes from intercourse. She can get me off in less than 5 minutes with fellatio.

Its not that I'm such a great lover (but I am, of course) - its that together we make great love.

Personally I would never again be in a relationship with a woman who can't climax easily.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Girls with a fondness for their vibrators seem to have a hard time cvmming, at least when they are with a guy.

 

[Latinoman]

Girls with a fondness for their vibrators seem to have a hard time cvmming, at least when they are with a guy.

I agree.

 

[Latinoman]

Personally I would never again be in a relationship with a woman who can't climax easily.

I feel the same.