Why do young men stop sleeping with attractive wives

[Pandora]

This is related to the previous post i just made but i felt it deserved its own thread. I have a few very attractive female friends that i feel into the "friendzone" with. They recently got married. So they tell me a lot of personal information. These girls are in their late 20's. The one central claim they keep having is that their husbands don't have se* with them anymore. I always thought it was the women that is supposed to hold out on se*. In reality i have found that it is often the man who just stops.

The women often make excuses like " maybe he is too tired after a long day". In my head im like "i would do you everyday if you were my wife". So i cant come up with a logical explanation as to why these dudes stop. Some of women swear that the guy is not cheating on her. But even of he was cheating why do they feel the need to stop? Any guys with attractive wives just stop hooking up with them? If so why?

 

[CrimsonPanther]

women: dressing sexy for people who they don't wanna have sex with. dressing sloppy for the one person they want to have sex with. that is one reason. my last gf, when we moved together, started to dress very unsexy at home. she looked like a used teddy bear. i don't wanna do a teddy bear.

other reasons: when living together, women start to nag you on small stuff, more drama, less affection. and they complain about lack of sex.

women think after marriage the man will change. men think women will not change. they will both be disappointed.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Sex is the barometer of a relationship, so when the sex falls off, the problem is usually something else. It's hard to want to have sex with someone you're mad at or resent over household issues.

 

[CrimsonPanther]

In my opinion: most husbands get tired of sleeping with the same woman.

I've rarely been able to sustain sexual desire for the same woman after a few months.

Variety is better, in my opinion.

Catch and release.

Luv 'em and leave 'em. Much more adventurous and fulfilling life.

spot on
not socially accepted though, you will have to have thick cheeks and immunity against shaming

 

[JoeMarron]

In my opinion: most husbands get tired of sleeping with the same woman.

I've rarely been able to sustain sexual desire for the same woman after a few months.

Variety is better, in my opinion.

Catch and release.

Luv 'em and leave 'em. Much more adventurous and fulfilling life.

I believe men fall on a spectrum, a bell curve when it comes to desire for variety. Dudes like you on the far right, guys like me further to the left, and most dudes in the middle. I feel I would have no problem being satisfied with the same woman for long periods of time. However, I've never had a steady supply of pvssy so I really have no clue how I would feel

 

[DonGorgon]

most young attractive females in their 20s are very attracted to gay men and bisexual men..and they end up married to these men and then the gay husband stops wanting sex cause the two were always better matched as friends...

BUT dont let women fool you when they are married tok a man who want sex from them eventually the females are the ons who cut off the sex and start cheating

 

[Pandora]

thanks for the replies guys. they are all very helpful. i got a lot of thinking to do.

 

[Jitterbug]

In my head im like "i would do you everyday if you were my wife".

That's because you don't have to live with her.

 

[evan12]

Because of nagging and passive aggressive behavior make a man don't want to have such with a woman that she is abusing him mentally .

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Pandora,
Yes there are Married Men who don't enjoy sex very often,not a lot though...Studies vary,but generally indicate around seven percent at thirty five..after that lifestyle issues kick in and there is an exponential rise...for young people no more than ten percent I would have thought...So there is another explanation,the Women you are talking to,are looking for a bit of action from you...Their story which may be fictitious or exaggerated gives them a plausible excuse for you and more importantly them to break time honoured taboos...But Pandora if you can take some advice from an old fool,steer clear,such Women are always bad news.

 

[Wolfgang D]

The one central claim they keep having is that their husbands don't have se* with them anymore.

Ah, I read something about this in Muscleman's A Dark Heart blog, which I link to in my sig. About losing desire in time. Well, it is obvious. As some have said here: could be something wrong in the relationship. Could be that you lose interest in sleeping with the same woman week after week, month after month - I know I do. After a long time it feels like eating the same meal every day.

Could also be that they are not making an effort in bed. I was dating a really sexy girl, but I had to practically beg for anything out of the ordinary. She preferred the missionary position, and that's it. In bed, always. In the evening. Under the blanket.

Could also be that the partner gets fat, but in this case you say the women are still attractive. Let's remember that for the future, though: it is very important that both partners stay in shape. No other single thing you can do to improve a relationship is better than this. You stay attractive, you have more energy, you have more respect for each other.


Let's all take a moment to read Muscleman's 16 Ways a Beta Blew His Marriage:

Although long term relationships (and marriage by extension) have an additional set of rules for success, the basic tenets of game still apply. ‘Letting your guard down’ and ‘finally being yourself’ implies incongruent behavior at the beginning of the relationship. This later unveiling of the ‘real’ you is a recipe for disaster. So is the assumption that once the knot is tied the game is over.

It’s never over.

 

[bodybyvi]

i can see that variety is better but it is also the destroyer of your healthy marriage life. but i must say, really awesome observation.

 

[Solomon]

most young attractive females in their 20s are very attracted to gay men and bisexual men..and they end up married to these men and then the gay husband stops wanting sex cause the two were always better matched as friends...

BUT dont let women fool you when they are married tok a man who want sex from them eventually the females are the ons who cut off the sex and start cheating

LOL @ THIS

PLEASE POST EVIDENCE OR SOURCES OR THIS IS KBJ RUBBISH

SOMEONE'S BEEN WATCHING TO MUCH "LOVE&HIP-HOP"

:crackup:

 

[backbreaker]

the wife and i used to have sex 3 or so times a week. 3-4 times a week. now it's like 1-2 honestly. I mean, she's stil attracted to me, I'm still very much attracted to her. it's just not my number 1 priority right now.

I mean, we've probably had sex at least 1000 times lol. I mean ****. It's not going anywhere. I understand the premise but judging a relationship on the amount of sex you have is quite silly. I remember the married girl i used to screw when i was single, would make sure to have sex with her husband, just so he would not be suspicious.

And I mean, i'ts just a hassle more nights than not. she goes to bed like at 8:30-9pm and gets up like at 4:30-5am every morning most days. I am usually still working at that time. The only time we generally go to bed together is on the weekends. I'm not going to cut my day short just so i can get some lol. she's not going to stay up 3 hours late just to make sure i can have sex, and consider our son gets up like at 5:30 for some reason i dont' want her to . I'm not geting up at 5:30 lol.

Now once the woman starts making excuses or making you have to bargain for the sex that's another thing. but just, oh i'm not having sex 4 times a week and iv'e been married for 4 years.. lol.

 

[Married Buried]

Mental issues. If you have a hot wife you should not lose interest in banging her. I am not lying I have gone a couple weeks without banging. Being busy at work and stuff like that is no excuse. The fact is after being married awhile you lose appreciation for what you have. You have to come to terms with the mental block. I did that and we bang alot more now. Imagine if your wife was a hot piece of NEW a$$ every night. Would you still not be interested in sex? Hell no.

It's all in the head.

 

[LiveFreeX]

When I came to China, I had just finished a Domino's Pepperoni Pizza, it was sort of ho hum.. then as I stayed in China, I realized that I might never have pizza again. A few times I had something very expensive that was like pizza but never the pizza itself... 2 years went by with no pizza in sight and I sort of forgot about it. Then one day in a new city, I found this place called Pizza 2 Pizza, recommended to me by a workmate. My god, I sat down to this delectable pie, took my first bite and explosions of flavour ripped through my brain.. it was simply orgasmic. I started my love affair with this pizza place bouncing between olive only to spinach, veggie delight to mozerella double cheese with tomatoes and cold mozzerella slices. I ate pizzas every night for almost a week, then 4 times a week... eventually down to 3, then 2... then once a week... now I go maybe once a month or so... meh, its not so important anymore if you get to eat it regularily and you know that pizza place isn't going anywhere fast.

Its the same for my wife.

I really do love pizza though and thats a true pizza story. If you are ever down south China be sure to look it up, best pizza I've ever had in 15 countries. Hmmm, alll this talk of pizza has made me hungry... funny enough when I look at pizza, even other pizzas in the city, I always want MY Pizza 2 Pizza pizza. Yikes, I've written pizza so many times the word is starting to look weird to me. Wonder why that happens.

Anyway sex is a similar thing, when you aren't getting any, you feel as those you need it. When you can get it anytime or you've had a ton of it... sex is just meh.

If you asked me whether I would rather have a pizza or sex, usually the pizza would win out... also xbox.

The other thing about sex is that its messy and I often find myself wondering after the load has been blown and I've come to my senses once again, if it was healthy that I just went down on my wife and she hadn't showered all day. I know my wife is pretty clean so I really wouldn't want to sex anyone else... just think ppl are dirty, one white chick I went down on burnt my face like battery acid, most disgusting mess I'd ever smelled. Probably a sesspool of bacteria and their feces. Also the frequent STD scares that come with smashing a new woman... or pregnancy scares when you have just banged a total slvt. Oh why did I ruin my life for this b1tch!!! (Been there done that). I'd rather smash my wife and know that she is the best possible fit for a family if she does get pregnant, which Im hoping she does.

Sex really isn't that important when you are getting it all the time.

 

[Colossus]

Anyway sex is a similar thing, when you aren't getting any, you feel as those you need it. When you can get it anytime or you've had a ton of it... sex is just meh.

Lots of varied opinions in this thread. Pandora, I think the quote above pretty much sums it up though.

Yeah, there are odd reasons why men stop sleeping with their hot wives (like homosexuality, low testosterone, etc), but generally speaking I think it's just because you get tired of having sex with the same woman. It loses the luster it has when it's new or scarce.

Now like another poster said, it's a spectrum. There are many, many factors involved and getting into all of them is beyond the scope of a forum thread. I have a buddy who married his wife as a virgin (her, not him), and they have been married for 3 years or so. He says on average they probably have sex twice a week. It's not the he enjoys it any less, but it does become sort of routine and it's just not the burning compulsion it was when they were first married and the sex was brand new. And their relationship overall is great.

I've been in LTRs and I can corroborate the same thing. After a while you get kinda bored of the girl's body---even if she is an 8 or 9---and it's just not a burning impulse anymore. And with some women sex is a freaking production every time. They need dedicated foreplay for a certain amount of time, otherwise they aren't "ready", or they only want sex at 11 pm when you are getting into bed, or at 2 am on a weekend when you've been crushing beers for 4 hours. Then you have to shower or you'll get jock itch, etc. At that point other stuff just sounds and is more fun. That's why I don't think you can define the success of a relationship on sexual frequency. It's quality. Who is better off: The couple who has sex every day but has almost nothing in common except eating and banging, or the couple who has sex once a week but does a lot of fun stuff together and has tons of common ground and respect they built though friendship?

 

[backbreaker]

I've been in LTRs and I can corroborate the same thing. After a while you get kinda bored of the girl's body---even if she is an 8 or 9---and it's just not a burning impulse anymore. And with some women sex is a freaking production every time. They need dedicated foreplay for a certain amount of time, otherwise they aren't "ready", or they only want sex at 11 pm when you are getting into bed, or at 2 am on a weekend when you've been crushing beers for 4 hours. Then you have to shower or you'll get jock itch, etc. At that point other stuff just sounds and is more fun. That's why I don't think you can define the success of a relationship on sexual frequency. It's quality. Who is better off: The couple who has sex every day but has almost nothing in common except eating and banging, or the couple who has sex once a week but does a lot of fun stuff together and has tons of common ground and respect they built though friendship?

lol this is married life right here guys

about what, i forgot when but it was a while ago. we had just gotten home from a party. it was a friday night, our son was knocked out. she had a few drinks. so I'm sitting in bed on my tablet playing monopoly and she climbs in bed eating some ice cream and like between bites of her basket robins ice cream she 's like

her: "slurp.. backbreaker... slurp.. let's do something"


Me: "What's up? like what?"

Her: "slurp.. you want to do it lol?

Me: "Damn if you put it like that not really lol"

Her: "I'm sorry, let's go watch a movie in the living room then, Im not sleepy"

Me: "Okay"



I mean, i could have had sex with her that night. but I mean, being kinda tipsy and asking me for sex between bites of your ice cream cone is not out of playboy erotica

there are a few times wehn it's "hot kinky ass grabbing sex". usually after i get home from the gym or for whatever the reason we haven't seen each other in a fwe days like when she gets home from out of town, but usually it's something along the lines of the above. with or without the ice cream.

but seriusly, as corny as this sounds I have just as much fun watching a bad movie with her and listening to her silly comments during the movie and laughing with her as I do having sex. I really do.

 

[zekko]

but seriusly, as corny as this sounds I have just as much fun watching a bad movie with her and listening to her silly comments during the movie and laughing with her as I do having sex. I really do.

You're saying that you enjoy her as a person.
Is that even allowed around here?

 

[VikingKing]

In my longest relationship, two years, I would be banging every chance I got, to the point where we had to wait a couple days because, either her vag was raw, or I lost interest temporarily.

I would bang her like crazy for a while, then get bored and lazy for a while, then bang like a cave man, then bored. One time she come up all concerned and says, " We haven't had sex in a while."