Why do only a few women express their interests in me (long post) ?

[FutureOfficer73]

Greetings to my fellow Don Juaners,

I've been reading this forum for quite some time now and I like your responses to the questions for real life problems. I, too, have a question of my own, but couldn't quite think of a way to elaborate/express it until now. But first of all, please, allow me to introduce myself...

I'm a Sailor and I've been enlisting in the U.S. Navy for almost 2 1/2 years now (6 months away from receiving my first good conduct medal) . With a college education, I had an option to enter the service as a Naval officer, but I declined. I was far more interested in becoming a Navy photographer because I always wanted to be one even before graduating from college. Though there were hard days that I'd rather forget in the Navy, I never regret my decision for enlisting.

Prior to enlisting I dated but never really had much success. My luck doesn't improve much after putting on a uniform. I became aware of the reputations of female Sailors for being slutty and promiscuous early in my Navy career. Though, the rumors are true, there are a few that have great qualities that I couldn't resist. I dated two blonde Sailors at my command and so far I've officially gone 0-for-2 (both got called out on strike three). After the break-ups, it took me roughly 4-5 days for me to recover and pick myself back up. If any of you who are in the service, I strongly DO NOT recommend you dating anyone from the same command. It's exactly like dating your co-worker(s) in the same office. Take my word for it.

I've tried several dating services via internet (Match.com or a.k.a. "hog farm" like someone here put it) and the results aren't much in my favor. I'd get a few responses, went out on a few dates but didn't get to see, smell, or taste "the precious". Maybe I didn't play my cards right. Sometimes, I wonder if there's something wrong with me. Do my profiles sound too ambitious and relate myself too much with my career or the Navy? Is being a Sailor turning women away? Am I not good looking enough? From the scale of 1-10, I'd rate myself a 5 at best (do we men rate ourselves too?). However, I consider myself to be athletic and in great shape, look much younger for this old age, and funny with a great sense of humor. I've been told that I have a good demeanor and I always walk with pride. Some of my friends tell me that I'm looking too hard. Possibly, I think, but I'd be in a worse situation if I hadn't. I guess one of the solutions is for me to go out more and try to meet more women...maybe my luck will change.

I'm open to any suggestion or question. Anyone who's curious about joining the armed forces (the Navy in general) feel free to ask me, and NOT your local recruiters, directly. Your feedbacks would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

 

[MRomeo99]

I wrote a pretty long set of posts on what I use on online services to get women interested. I have been pretty successful. However, I'm a natural seducer after I meet the women, so your success may vary in getting the pootay.

Here's my post:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=59212

Hopefully that should answer your questions on how to be more successful. Sorry I'm lazy and don't really feel like retyping.

HTH,

M

 

[Big Pappy]

FutureOfficer73,

Well, I can tell from your post that, as you stated, you have a sense of humor. I can also tell that your intelligent, at least, smarter than the average bear.

There are a number of possible reasons why you're not doing as well as you would like.

So, let's take a look.

What are your "reasonable" expectations when you walk into a social situation with abot 40-60% women?

When you enter a room, are you scoping the territory out almost immediately? <desperate?> How many people in the room are you on friendly terms with? <social proof>

You're likely in good shape. How are you dressing? Your clothes don't have to be new. But, be sure that you don't smell like you've been on a boat for 6 months. Bad breath?

How many women are you talking with on a daily basis? (Not how many chicks are lined up, how many different girls do you approach on average in a day.)

On a ship, I would expect that there aren't a vast supply of women who are worthy.

Try to remember that you can always find "just any girl" - you're looking for 1. a pretty one or 2. a rich one or 3. an exceptionaly bright, pretty and fun one or some combination of all these.

Perhaps you need to change your playground, so that you can meet more playmates.

I'm sure that this doesn't help much, but it's all I've got for you right now.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Ummm, have you ever asked a woman? No seriously, if you have any sisters, ask them. Ask any women friends that you know too. I wouldn't ask enlisted women because their views may be non mainstream because of your line of work. If you want the right answer, go to the ones that have the answer.

 

[FutureOfficer73]

thanks for your responds

Thank you for all of the three responds that I received. I'm sorry I wasn't able to reply much sooner. I've been caught up with D2X, an online game that my roommate got me addicted after walking away for more than 1/2 year. There's really simply no excuse for it.

Out of the three responds that I received I think what you, Big Pappy, said or asked me in your post struck my head with a nail. I'll try to answer at what you asked me as much, honestly, and throughly but concisely as I can.

I was more like an AFC till my late 20's . I don't recall how I came across sosuave.com, but by educating myself with the available and invaluable information on this site, it truly helped transform my way of thinking and made me understand women so much more. Though, I know how to handle myself with better composure and attitude, I still think there's some slight touch of AFCness in me that I have to "exorcise".

I have a much easier time with women than before, but I still don't generally approach women all that much. I can strike conversations with them for some casual talks, not only to practice being around them but to constantly remind myself that they're human just like us men. However, there are only a few girls that I would flirt. Once I get to know the girl I would flirt with her mercilessly and endlessly.

At this point of my life I'd rather meet quality women. They have to be well-educated with good demeanor (I'm from an old school and old-fashioned), beautiful and in a good shape. I tend to look for some college girls or someone ages from 23 to 30. Of course if she has all that, but she's a bore then my interest in her wouldn't last as long. I do believe that women have such high expectation of men and so do I in women.

There were many times that the unavaible women (either in a relationship, married or too old to be my date ) often gave me compliments that either I'm an awesome guy or I'm a sweetheart. They hardly knew me, and vice versa, yet why did they think that?

San Diego has so much to offer at so many different places. I guess I should take this opportunity to explore and enjoy the time by myself before I have to head out to sea. I'll check out a command camera and start shooting what this beautiful state has to offer. I should run into quite a few beautiful Cali girls and hopefully I'll get more than their numbers.

Please keep the feed back coming and I'll start responding to other questions on this site as well. Happy hunting.