Why Are People So Flaky?

Zimbabwe

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I'm not just talking about girls, but guys as well.

I attended a Meetup last night and Apperntly 70% of the people who did an RSVP to attend didn't even bother to show up at all. I asked the organiser and she said this was normal with most meetups.

Why is this even the case, why are people so flaky/flighty these days?

why are actually committing and following through with plans, calling/texting people back, and punctuality now the exception?
 

joesbigship

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A 50% no show rate is probably about average for meetups with a few dozen rsvp's. If 50 to 60 sign up, perhaps 20 to 30 will show.

Often, it's the attractive women who are most likely to flake out, very often at the last second. When there are attractive women, they're almost always the friend of an unattractive woman who signed up.

There is pretty much nothing that can or will change the dynamics of meetup at this point. You'll just have to learn to live with it or abandon it for something else. It'd be like shopping at dollar tree every week and complaining you can't find filet mignon and kobe beef.

I had a fun summer and found in early fall to my surprise that there had been several meetups active so thought I'd try it out again as I've been able to leverage them with significant success in the past. The quality of talent has plummeted. Even clicking on the profiles themselves is enough to make you cringe, so imagine the talent pool assembled all at once!
 

It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Willie Naylor

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People equate 'being really busy' with a higher social status.

They view it as a badge of honor when they stand someone up, or can't make it to a function.

Technology was billed as all this stuff that would make our lives easier. But, it's actually made us more lazy, vain, and un-sociable than ever before.
 
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I think that's usual for any event that's free. Back when I used to run events for an organisation I believe it was like a 1/5 turn up rate. You have to get people to pay things first to get them invested to actually show up. That's why we often charged a small fee even when there wasn't a need.
 

Zimbabwe

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People equate 'being really busy' with a higher social status.

They view it as a badge of honor when they stand someone up, or can't make it to a function.

Technology was billed as all this stuff that would make our lives easier. But, it's actually made us more lazy, vain, and un-sociable than ever before.
It's kinda like how people pretend to be full when offered food/snacks.

It's idiotic to be honest


Tired from work + the alternative to all that is more attractive. Netflix, YouTube, porn, vidya and of course laying in bed
It doesn't really make sense as to why they even bother to sign up if they won't even put the effort in

A 50% no show rate is probably about average for meetups with a few dozen rsvp's. If 50 to 60 sign up, perhaps 20 to 30 will show.

Often, it's the attractive women who are most likely to flake out, very often at the last second. When there are attractive women, they're almost always the friend of an unattractive woman who signed up.

There is pretty much nothing that can or will change the dynamics of meetup at this point. You'll just have to learn to live with it or abandon it for something else. It'd be like shopping at dollar tree every week and complaining you can't find filet mignon and kobe beef.

I had a fun summer and found in early fall to my surprise that there had been several meetups active so thought I'd try it out again as I've been able to leverage them with significant success in the past. The quality of talent has plummeted. Even clicking on the profiles themselves is enough to make you cringe, so imagine the talent pool assembled all at once!
I agree that it is average, the other few I attended had the same problem. People just don't bother showing up or cancel last minute.

People complain about being lonely yet put zero effort into actually being social. I'm not even sure what to do at this point.
 

Velasco

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It doesn't really make sense as to why they even bother to sign up if they won't even put the effort in
Because they had intention to. It's easy to sign up/say yes to something in the moment. Then times goes by and then you don't feel like doing that thing anymore even tho you did have intention in the moment. The alternative at THAT moment, looks more attractive. And then your like "ehhhh think I'll just stay home instead"
 

Stuffnu

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The answer is actually quite simple.:
Flaking and ghosting is predominantly getting worse because people can hide behind there cell phones, apps, gmail, etc. and remain completely anonymous.
No need for accountability.
Back in the day you had to do stuff in person or via old landlines that was easily traceable (call display, *69).
 

biggoal

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Flaky and women can be applied to sales too! Like at my business at the market I get this ALL THE TIME and mostly from women.

I mean like I sell electronics and accessories. Women will look at the cases for their phone. Touch them, think about it, keep looking at them say how they like this one, or this sparkle cases. Sometimes it will take ten minutes for them to decide. Maybe times they walk if they can't decide.

But then you will have a man for example. They might take a couple minutes to look. Usually they can decide pretty quick and will quickly pick up a case they like and bam, sale complete, easy sale unless it's an old person and they're cheap and walk.

Men are much much easier to sell to. They're not very picky.

Same way in dating, much like OLD. "This guy A looks like guy B, but guy A is a lawyer, guy B is only a police officer though and making 45k a year. Guy A probably makes 200k a year, I'll go with him but guy C is a dermatologist probably makes 350k a year maybe I'll go with him."
 

bat soup

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I'm not just talking about girls, but guys as well.

I attended a Meetup last night and Apperntly 70% of the people who did an RSVP to attend didn't even bother to show up at all. I asked the organiser and she said this was normal with most meetups.

Why is this even the case, why are people so flaky/flighty these days?

why are actually committing and following through with plans, calling/texting people back, and punctuality now the exception?
I'd say it's mainly because there's no consequences. Clicking on a button isn't that much of a commitment.
 

Epicenter

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1. Because they really wanted it but now they feel less motivated.
2. They were not much motivated but thought maybe I will do it.
3. They forgot it.
 
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