Who Has a Greater Desire to Help? Women or Men?

[Desdinova]

This is something that I've noticed over time... Women are much more useful than men when it comes to helping with anything. I cannot count the number of times I've been let down by my male friends when it came to getting help for something. They will occasionally do it, but they're usually busy with other stuff.

Women on the other hand... I've lost count of the number of times women are 100% willing to help. I get women to help me with lots of things. I got a pack of women to help me clean my yard last year before a huge party. I've had women help me with home renos. My GF help me put drywall up this past week. They are the fvcking best helpers I've ever had.

Anybody else have the same experience?

 

[oOh Nasty]

I'd have to say that I also notice this. My male friends only come through maybe 50 to 60 percent of the time and there's always that feeling of burden between us. There's always that tension that one owes another, usually not communicated verbally. With my female friends (orbiters?), they do things for me ever so happily and there's never that moment where I feel as if I'll need to repay them. They just have that way of making me feel comfortable, and that their help is unconditional. Maybe me spending time with them is enough ?

For example, I have a female friend who translated documents for me from English to Mandarin for my job. She didn't ask for anything in return, but I took her out for simple dinner afterwards and that was the end of that. She left with a smile and I left with translated documents that I needed.

My male friends usually have excuse after excuse for not being able to do something they say. I think in this day and age, it's such a habit to "say things" and make promises and it's okay to not do them. Women, on the other hand, when they say they will do something [for a man], they'll try their best to do it and on time, or else they'll have a pretty legit excuse and tons of guilt. Even if they can't make the schedule, they'll usually reach out to me first very apologetically. With dudes, most of the time they won't even contact me if they can't make it to something. Promises and expectations seem to just disappear into the air. Perhaps women just truly love to be at the service of [worthy] men.

My theory is that dudes are businessmen. At my age, I don't provide much value to my male friends anymore and vice-versa. Women will always have that need to be subservient, however.

 

[dasein]

Have found the opposite in my anecdotal experience, far easier to get male help than female when we are talking about material help. Females will make small, easy, low effort gestures, but men will be the ones to do heavy lifting and real work. Half the women I've had experience with in life, including some family I love dearly, think that doing laundry and going to the grocery store are "work." If there is a skew in getting men to help v women, it's because so many men are busy doing all their work and 50% of a woman's as well. That comes off sexist, them's the breaks.