When you are the 3rd person (tag along)?

[Phenomenom101]

Hello,

I just remembered how this sometimes happens to me. Have you ever been maybe talking with someone (girl that you like) and then maybe someone comes along that has known her for a long time (also currently knows her). Well, when I just barely know a girl I try to find out as much as I can about her but I can't compare to someone she has known for a longer time. Well, sometimes I feel like the tag-along. I am the third person just listening to their conversation and if I try to say something I can't really be part of the conversation. The person she talks to could be a guy that likes her and has spent more time with her. He could also be more involved in her life. That kinda pisses me off cause I get put back to almost being a nobody to her. I just sometimes fell like "fukk it" and I might leave and do what I want to do. Is there really any way to avoid this? Can I jump up tp that point where the "guy" is at quickly? I know someone has been at this situation and makes them feel like crap, so is there any way to avoid this? Hoep tp hear from you all. LATEZ

 

[karmavsDogma]

Get her number, and go about your day.

 

[JJMcLure]

Clearly you would not be the Alpha male in that situation.

If you were, you would dominate the chick and the guy. It is easy to dominate Betas, so unless the other guy you are coming up against is always super alpha my feeling is you are not alpha enough.

For example if the chick has a chump AFC who she knows well, you should be able to draw both their attention and focus the conversation around what you say.

If you become a spare wheel eject and say you'll catch her later (or get her number in front of the other guy ). You'll only look a chump if you stay there not saying anything while they carry on talking ignoring you.

I just sometimes fell like "fukk it" and I might leave and do what I want to do.

Follow your instinct on this. Do what YOU want. You are not out to please anyone else.

I think the following exercise from the Bible would help you:

http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000727.html

 

[Phenomenom101]

Yeah I like that advice JJMcLure

See sometimes it's not that I JUST met the girl but have known her for about a week. I still consider this to be earliy territory. Well, sometimes there are these guys that hang out with her a lot. I mean A LOT (some go to church with her). I have a job and school and bills to pay so I can't and wont be devoting my time to spend with her. I sometimes feel challenged cause these guys are the kind she likes (tall, dark, etc). I am not tall but I am built. I am not dark and I have tried to get tand but they don't help. These guys spend time with her and flirt with her. Sometimes I just fell so much competition I want to just leave (like I said in my first post). Should I just next them whenever this happens or what?

 

[JJMcLure]

Originally posted by Phenomenom101
Yeah I like that advice JJMcLure

See sometimes it's not that I JUST met the girl but have known her for about a week. I still consider this to be earliy territory. Well, sometimes there are these guys that hang out with her a lot. I mean A LOT (some go to church with her). I have a job and school and bills to pay so I can't and wont be devoting my time to spend with her. I sometimes feel challenged cause these guys are the kind she likes (tall, dark, etc). I am not tall but I am built. I am not dark and I have tried to get tand but they don't help. These guys spend time with her and flirt with her. Sometimes I just fell so much competition I want to just leave (like I said in my first post). Should I just next them whenever this happens or what?

These guys can hang around her being her FRIEND all they like. They can hang around her week in week out hoping to get somewhere, but all they do is slip into the friend zone. That's a pit they won't climb out of.

You aren't interested in being her friend. You are interested in fvcking her (at least, I hope you are ). Don't aim to become her friend, don't try and conceal your intentions. Get her number or arrange to hang out with her/coffee date. The sooner you do this the better, the longer you leave it the harder it gets. Also, the worse you would feel if she said no!

Imagine it like a junction in a railroad track, that head off in two different directions. Based on your actions in the first/early encounter(s), your train heads off down one of the two tracks (just a friend or a potential sexual partner). Train tracks are one way and there's no going back, so make sure you get on the one you want to be on.

As for her type of guy? Fvck it. It doesn't matter what she wants, it matters what you want. Pay attention to a chick's ACTIONS not her WORDS. What they say and do are two different things.

Don't next a chick without at least making a move. Try to get her number/get her on a date. If the result is going to be she is not interested, at least make her count you out rather than do it yourself due to some "competition". It comes down to not being afraid of rejection (try DJ Bootcamp week 4 in the DJ Bible).

 

[Bill]

Good points made in replies to your post. At first it does feel awkward and you just may feel like you're not fully "fitting in" the situation, but such is life sometimes and you need to seize every opportunity that you see. Being an alpha, dominating betas may seem hard, even impossible, at times... but you need to focus and go for what you want.
In a nutshell: don't let a guy -- let alone somebody else -- scare you on your way to getting a girl's number, or whatever. Be a part of the conversation; even better, BE the conversation. It's not that hard once you reach the confidence threshold required (which is more of a mental barrier you may have placed before yourself). I believe most of us have been where you are right, including me (3rd person in a conversation is not a pleasant situation, that's for sure!).
C'mon on now, unless she regularly fvcks the guy, there is no reason he should be an obstacle of any sort... go for it bro!
Best of luck.
Respect.

 

[matius]

When you are the 3rd person (tag along)?

Instead of tag along, I prefer the Third Wheel Legend.

 

[Phenomenom101]

Alright thanks everyone. This doesn't happen to me a lot but I just wanted some advice for the next time it does happen. THANKS

 

[es_mer8]

I personally would like to leave as soon as someone else enters because the conversation will never be the same or never be as personal again. I'd just ask the girl for her number quick and then duck out.