When the girl got a social life and you dont.

[studofnorway]

I have been dating this freshman girl since she started univ 1 month ago and we have had some great sex. But the problem is not that..

I am not used to having a social life (!). I have basically been spending time studing and working, and I enjoy that. Anyway, I do have social skills, and thats how I got a gf. I do know how to handle people, but what I do not know, is what to do with people.

What do 19 year old girls like to do generally? All I can imagine is getting drunk at a party or going to the movies. But I do know people do other stuff

 

[Levrone]

Why dont you ask her what she likes to do?

Or maybe better, try to figure out what she likes instead of asking. It will probably be something like shopping

 

[cfajason]

Well my GF is 19,she goes shopping,to the movies,hangs out with her friends,goes to the clubs...etc. I only see her once a week.....

 

[studofnorway]

"I only see her once a week....."

Really, so, that is enough?

 

[cfajason]

Its enough for me

 

[Svullo]

If you read books like Atlas Shrugged you will realize that spending your time with working and studying is much better than having a social life.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Svullo
If you read books like Atlas Shrugged you will realize that spending your time with working and studying is much better than having a social life.

That was a joke, right?

 

[Climax]

studofnorway: Simple solution here is to GET A SOCIAL LIFE! Start. Go out, meet people, adopt new hobbies, play a sport, go clubbing, do a BOOT CAMP to lift up ur confidence, etc etc..... No chicks like losers with no social life.... so think to yourself.... do YOU want to be that loser? ... You have the power to change... my question to you is... are you going to USE that power to change? .............

.... I should hope so.


Laterz...

 

[Svullo]

Francisco d'Anconia: You of all people should realize that you measure a man's worth by the quality of his work. Bill Gates is probably one of the best men on this planet and rational girls should find him more attractive than the local drugaddict/criminal but society rewards worthless parasites and this is true about girls too. They reward the worthless drug addict who can't balance his own checkbook BECAUSE he is a bad man.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Svullo
Francisco d'Anconia: You of all people should realize that you measure a man's worth by the quality of his work. Bill Gates is probably one of the best men on this planet and rational girls should find him more attractive than the local drugaddict/criminal but society rewards worthless parasites and this is true about girls too. They reward the worthless drug addict who can't balance his own checkbook BECAUSE he is a bad man.

I feel it's all about having a purpose and being productive, this does not necessarily limited to just work. I'm not going to cheat myself out of having a good time by putting my emphasis on work. It's all about balance and being productive in whatever you do.

Consider this, is a guy that only works 40 hours a week necessarily less productive than one that works 60? How about one that only works 20? It's not about the quantity of time, it's about the quality of what you produce (work smarter, not harder).

You mentioned Bill Gates, do you believe his fortune is made just by putting in tons of hours at work? He's a thinker, an innovator. That's why he turned over the reigns of Microsoft to Steve Balmer. Steve takes care of running Microsoft, Bill creates the vision for the organization and their products, that's why he's just focuses on development. That decision alone has made him even more wealthy.

I'm not saying that knowledge and work isn't important, but what's the purpose of doing all of that if you forgo enjoying the benefits of what you produce?

 

[ikkenai]

Originally posted by Svullo
Francisco d'Anconia: You of all people should realize that you measure a man's worth by the quality of his work. Bill Gates is probably one of the best men on this planet and rational girls should find him more attractive than the local drugaddict/criminal but society rewards worthless parasites and this is true about girls too. They reward the worthless drug addict who can't balance his own checkbook BECAUSE he is a bad man.

"Rational" girls. IE Fat blimps, pizza faces, feminazis, etc.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by ikkenai
"Rational" girls. IE Fat blimps, pizza faces, feminazis, etc.

STOP IT!!! YOU'RE SCARING ME!!!!

 

[sparky1981]

Originally posted by Levrone
Why dont you ask her what she likes to do?

Or maybe better, try to figure out what she likes instead of asking. It will probably be something like shopping

You could try teaching her something for fun. I once taught a girl how to iceskate and it boosted my r/l with to a new level cause we started getting in to it as something to do and she really liked it

 

[pimpfromdayone]

I find it hard to believe she actually gives a fu-ck about your social life. I mean, you do your own thing, you take care of business (work, study), she should respect that, even admire you for it. A woman wants a man who has his own life, outside of her, and it sounds like you have that covered pretty well. I think it helps to be social to find women, and women value social status of course, but if she is already your gf, I don't see the problem. Well, let me put it this way: if she actually cares how many friends I have, and how many drunken parties I have been to, I don't want her, haha. Woman want a man of value, with good social status if possible, but dam-n, the bullsh-it has to end somewhere....

 

[Vincent Freeman]

Originally posted by pimpfromdayone
I find it hard to believe she actually gives a fu-ck about your social life. I mean, you do your own thing, you take care of business (work, study), she should respect that, even admire you for it. A woman wants a man who has his own life, outside of her, and it sounds like you have that covered pretty well. I think it helps to be social to find women, and women value social status of course, but if she is already your gf, I don't see the problem. Well, let me put it this way: if she actually cares how many friends I have, and how many drunken parties I have been to, I don't want her, haha. Woman want a man of value, with good social status if possible, but dam-n, the bullsh-it has to end somewhere....

Very well put! I completely agree with this. If she really cares about you and has her priorities straight, then she will value the fact that your not a freshman anymore but rather someone of more maturity. Now, I am not saying not to go out and be social. Women like a guy who is exciting, but there are many ways to do that. Just do what you enjoy, and if she's worth it, she'll like it too. Good luck!

 

[pimpfromdayone]

You know, even though everyone says that girls reach maturity by the time they enter college, I think it takes most girls until like the age of 25 to reach full maturity, some longer, some shorter. Partying and getting drunk every night is NOT mature behavior. Being social is great, but guess what happens to MOST people as they age? They have fewer and fewer (if any) true friends, mostly because they no longer need friends, because they are mature enough to finally be independent. Most people have friends for two main reasons:
they need to feel accepted
they are bored
Now someone will say that maybe this is because I don't have friends, to which I will laugh and say, I do and I don't. I have friends, but I am at the level to where I am completely self-sufficient so I don't need them....This is directed at the original poster. I am sure he is mature enough to understand what I am saying. You don't see successful people going around trying to make friends with everyone.... they don't need to, they have their own life, not living through other people. Ah... I digress.

So, mature is the word of the day: if she isn't mature enough to be with a mature man such as yourself, find a girl who is. She is a freshman in college, so there is a good chance she is very out of touch with reality at this point.

 

[frivolousz21]

why dont u have friends...

what is better in life than friends..oh women.