poohead
Senior Don Juan
here is my situation. i am an idiot and i don't know how to deal with women one bit. i think i set some kind of record of doing all the wrong things in the shortest amount of time. feel free to ***** slap me. this shzt will not happen again. ever.
met a girl on a dating site. i put her on my favorites, she messaged me. we emailed a couple of times. i got the phone number and a tentative coffee date for the weekend. we talked for hours on the phone for the days before the date. on the day of the date she calls and says she would like to meet later. i figure she is blowing me off so i go hang out with my buddies. she calls later, but i'm already out. i come home that night and call her again, and we talk a long time. we talk again a long time a couple days later, at which point i ask her out again, she says yes. i don't call her for a few days until the date. but i email her to remind her.
the girl has various issues with men (people in general actually) due to some traumatic things that happened in her teenage years, which i won't go into. she is not your normal girl, suffice to say. the day before the date she calls me to hang out, i call her back but get her answering machine, we play phone tag a little but i never reach her. on the day of the date i go to the place - she never shows and i go home later to find she had emailed me to tell me that she wants to reschedule for later in the day. i call her later and we talk for a long time again.
the next day i call her, leave a voice mail, she calls back. i say let's hang out. i go over to her house and proceed to have the best date i've had so far in my life. i feel relaxed, convo is great. we drink and listen to music, go for a walk. she made me a mix tape, and suggests we go on a road trip together. we hang out in her bedroom. she tells me, while stretching out on the couch 'i need to get laid'. i don't try to sex her, thinking there's a chance it may lead to not getting a second date. i wind up kissing her a couple of times, then leave. one thing that happened on the date - the phone rang, it was a guy - she throws the phone at me and says 'you talk to him'. she goes to the washroom, i make smalltalk with the guy - he is obviously really bummed out - and hang up. when she comes back i ask why did she make me talk to him. she says 'why are you scared to talk to him?'
i wasn't going to call til a few days had passed, but she calls the next day. i suggest we hang out that night - she tells me a 'friend' is coming over to pick her up to go get ice cream and then she hangs up right away. the next day she emails saying 'we should get together again'. a couple of days pass. on friday i see that she had called several times but not left a message. i go out to the bar with my friends. the bar is loud, i see she has called a few times while i was at the bar, i check my voice mail - she has left 2 angry/annoyed sounding messages. i call her - she is having a party for her sister at her house, there are a lot of people over, a lot of guys. she tells me 'your loss, my gain' then tries to get some dude at the party to come to the phone and talk to me. i tell her to have a good time and i'll talk to her later.
the next day i call - she asks me how was the bar, i ask her to hang out that day, she says she'll call me later that day but never does. the next day i call - she tells me about how that guy at the party tried to hit on her but she didn't like him, i ask her out again, i tell her i'll call her later. i call her but she's not home. i wind up calling her place like 10 times that night. i leave 3 really stupid voice mail messages: one telling her i'm going to leave her alone since it's obvioius she's not answering my calls, one making a really goofy joke, and one saying 'what about that kiss last week, that meant nothing to you?'
probably my worst move of all - i ask what i should do to my ex girlfriend of all people - she tells me to buy her flowers and write her a note. as if it could not get any worse - i call her the next day, she finally answers - she calls me 'crazy' but she is laughing so i think she is still ok with the stupid voice mails. she tells me she was gone all day yesterday, and then asks me 'how many girls are you dating' i tell her 'noone'. i tell her to forget the voicemails, she laughs. then i say 'also forget the flowers i just sent' she goes 'awww'. somehow i manage to screw up even more by telling her that was my first date in five years (after breaking up with my ex).
so now i have decided to send the flowers, like the stupid chump that i am. i send them, along with a stupid note. it has been 3 days she has not so much as emailed me to say 'thanks, i got them'. i left a voice mail on her phone but she has not returned my call.
and that's it. time elapsed: approximately 1 month, fairly average length of time for me. thanks for listening be sure to tip your bartender!
met a girl on a dating site. i put her on my favorites, she messaged me. we emailed a couple of times. i got the phone number and a tentative coffee date for the weekend. we talked for hours on the phone for the days before the date. on the day of the date she calls and says she would like to meet later. i figure she is blowing me off so i go hang out with my buddies. she calls later, but i'm already out. i come home that night and call her again, and we talk a long time. we talk again a long time a couple days later, at which point i ask her out again, she says yes. i don't call her for a few days until the date. but i email her to remind her.
the girl has various issues with men (people in general actually) due to some traumatic things that happened in her teenage years, which i won't go into. she is not your normal girl, suffice to say. the day before the date she calls me to hang out, i call her back but get her answering machine, we play phone tag a little but i never reach her. on the day of the date i go to the place - she never shows and i go home later to find she had emailed me to tell me that she wants to reschedule for later in the day. i call her later and we talk for a long time again.
the next day i call her, leave a voice mail, she calls back. i say let's hang out. i go over to her house and proceed to have the best date i've had so far in my life. i feel relaxed, convo is great. we drink and listen to music, go for a walk. she made me a mix tape, and suggests we go on a road trip together. we hang out in her bedroom. she tells me, while stretching out on the couch 'i need to get laid'. i don't try to sex her, thinking there's a chance it may lead to not getting a second date. i wind up kissing her a couple of times, then leave. one thing that happened on the date - the phone rang, it was a guy - she throws the phone at me and says 'you talk to him'. she goes to the washroom, i make smalltalk with the guy - he is obviously really bummed out - and hang up. when she comes back i ask why did she make me talk to him. she says 'why are you scared to talk to him?'
i wasn't going to call til a few days had passed, but she calls the next day. i suggest we hang out that night - she tells me a 'friend' is coming over to pick her up to go get ice cream and then she hangs up right away. the next day she emails saying 'we should get together again'. a couple of days pass. on friday i see that she had called several times but not left a message. i go out to the bar with my friends. the bar is loud, i see she has called a few times while i was at the bar, i check my voice mail - she has left 2 angry/annoyed sounding messages. i call her - she is having a party for her sister at her house, there are a lot of people over, a lot of guys. she tells me 'your loss, my gain' then tries to get some dude at the party to come to the phone and talk to me. i tell her to have a good time and i'll talk to her later.
the next day i call - she asks me how was the bar, i ask her to hang out that day, she says she'll call me later that day but never does. the next day i call - she tells me about how that guy at the party tried to hit on her but she didn't like him, i ask her out again, i tell her i'll call her later. i call her but she's not home. i wind up calling her place like 10 times that night. i leave 3 really stupid voice mail messages: one telling her i'm going to leave her alone since it's obvioius she's not answering my calls, one making a really goofy joke, and one saying 'what about that kiss last week, that meant nothing to you?'
probably my worst move of all - i ask what i should do to my ex girlfriend of all people - she tells me to buy her flowers and write her a note. as if it could not get any worse - i call her the next day, she finally answers - she calls me 'crazy' but she is laughing so i think she is still ok with the stupid voice mails. she tells me she was gone all day yesterday, and then asks me 'how many girls are you dating' i tell her 'noone'. i tell her to forget the voicemails, she laughs. then i say 'also forget the flowers i just sent' she goes 'awww'. somehow i manage to screw up even more by telling her that was my first date in five years (after breaking up with my ex).
so now i have decided to send the flowers, like the stupid chump that i am. i send them, along with a stupid note. it has been 3 days she has not so much as emailed me to say 'thanks, i got them'. i left a voice mail on her phone but she has not returned my call.
and that's it. time elapsed: approximately 1 month, fairly average length of time for me. thanks for listening be sure to tip your bartender!
