What's The Best Time To Call
- Thread starter Disco
- Start date
Between 7 and 9pm, but it could be stretched to 6:30 to 9:30. Any earlier or later could be construed as desperate or rude. Coupled with the time is the frequency. You should call no more frequently than once every hour if she's not home, which ideally means 3 times per evening. If you call for three nights in a row (9-12 total calls) and she's still unavailable, NEXT.
El Campeon 56
Don Juan
Well personally i wholeheartedly disagree. RKTek how can you possibly say call a girl up to three times in one night? That is a massively desperate ploy showing you have absolutely nothing better going on that evening rather than sitting there calling her. The time frame of at the latest 9 30 is good, but i think that calling a girl once and maybe leaving a funny message or knowing she has caller id, whatever it takes to know she will see you called. If she doesnt call you back by three days later call once again. If after that you don't hear from her, she isn't interested in you and it's time to move on.
Shiftkey
Master Don Juan
I agree with El Campeon 56. 3 times in one night is too much.
Lone_raider
Senior Don Juan
Well here is my timetable for calling girls, after much failure this seems to work best for me. I never, ever call on Friday or Saturday if this is to be a first date, or even the first few dates. Why? Because you are suppossed to be a busy man, hanging out with your friends or dating other women on Friday and Saturday (even if your not still don't call lol). I find that Sunday afternoon has spawned some good results for me, Sunday is different, most people are off work and not going out, so they are doing nothing. I say anytime between Noon and 9:00 p.m. on this day. Monday - Thursday I go with 4 p.m. to 9 p.m. no earlier and no later.
As for call frequency I only call once per day. I think anymore then that is overdoing it. If I catch voice mail once I leave nothing, if I catch it the next day I leave nothing. But if there is still no answer I will leave a message on call 3. If she never replies I next her.
Not saying this is the best way to do things, but this is exactly what I do!
As for call frequency I only call once per day. I think anymore then that is overdoing it. If I catch voice mail once I leave nothing, if I catch it the next day I leave nothing. But if there is still no answer I will leave a message on call 3. If she never replies I next her.
Not saying this is the best way to do things, but this is exactly what I do!
Well, if you call her, and there is no answer and you hang up - then presumably, unless she is at home not answering, she does not know who called....right??
If she does not know who called, you are then free to give it another shot and she doesn't know a thing. She only knows who was the LAST caller (unless you are a retard and leave 3 messages on her answer phone). So, I don't see anything wrong with calling 3 times if she isn't home...although I probably would wait 60-90 minutes before giving it one last shot for the day (meaning I would only do it 2 times - no more).
Concerning the 9.30pm cut off point - it depends on the environment. If you are in Uni and go to bed fairly late, you could call latest ... say...10-10.30pm and it's probably not an intrusion...but sure, in normal circumstances, 9.30pm is the cut off...common sense I guess.
Calling in the evening is good, because she can think of you subconsciously while sleeping...cool eh?? Just hope she doesn't have nightmares about you.
Hi ShiftKey, how was your date with the German chick?
If she does not know who called, you are then free to give it another shot and she doesn't know a thing. She only knows who was the LAST caller (unless you are a retard and leave 3 messages on her answer phone). So, I don't see anything wrong with calling 3 times if she isn't home...although I probably would wait 60-90 minutes before giving it one last shot for the day (meaning I would only do it 2 times - no more).
Concerning the 9.30pm cut off point - it depends on the environment. If you are in Uni and go to bed fairly late, you could call latest ... say...10-10.30pm and it's probably not an intrusion...but sure, in normal circumstances, 9.30pm is the cut off...common sense I guess.
Calling in the evening is good, because she can think of you subconsciously while sleeping...cool eh?? Just hope she doesn't have nightmares about you.
Hi ShiftKey, how was your date with the German chick?
question on the matter
Answer me this. What if you call, she answers and tells you she will call you right back and never does? This happened to me last week when the girl I called said she will call back in ten minutes and never did.
Does this mean that she has no interest and you should next or should you give it one more shot and try again?
Answer me this. What if you call, she answers and tells you she will call you right back and never does? This happened to me last week when the girl I called said she will call back in ten minutes and never did.
Does this mean that she has no interest and you should next or should you give it one more shot and try again?
I thought about the above question and I've had this happen to me a few times. Two times I'll note:
1 - I called this girl I met at the grocery store one afternoon. It was like my third time trying to get in touch with her. When I finally did she acted like I was wasting her time and said "I'll call you back in a little while." No call, not like I was surprised.
About three weeks later I was bored one Saturday afternoon and I tried her again. To my surprise she was receptive. I banged her a few times and then didn't call her back.
2 - I had a date lined up with this hot 9. About an hour before the date she called and canceled with a lame excuse about consoling a friend who just found out their mother had breast cancer. She was supposed to call me back, but never did. Again one Saturday afternoon about a month later I called and she was down with a date. I ended up dating her for almost a year. And she was bi!, which is a plus as long as you know the future of the relationship is bleak.
3 - I just called the girl I mentioned above. I'm in central U.S. so it was like 9:35. She sounded excited, but when I said "what you got going on?" She said I'm actually in the middle of something, can I call you back in a little while?" I'm not expecting a call so I'll hit her again in about two weeks if I don't hear from her.
I think it's a lot of showing them you have other things you can be taken care of. You were actually doing them a favor giving up some of your *important* time to them.
1 - I called this girl I met at the grocery store one afternoon. It was like my third time trying to get in touch with her. When I finally did she acted like I was wasting her time and said "I'll call you back in a little while." No call, not like I was surprised.
About three weeks later I was bored one Saturday afternoon and I tried her again. To my surprise she was receptive. I banged her a few times and then didn't call her back.
2 - I had a date lined up with this hot 9. About an hour before the date she called and canceled with a lame excuse about consoling a friend who just found out their mother had breast cancer. She was supposed to call me back, but never did. Again one Saturday afternoon about a month later I called and she was down with a date. I ended up dating her for almost a year. And she was bi!, which is a plus as long as you know the future of the relationship is bleak.
3 - I just called the girl I mentioned above. I'm in central U.S. so it was like 9:35. She sounded excited, but when I said "what you got going on?" She said I'm actually in the middle of something, can I call you back in a little while?" I'm not expecting a call so I'll hit her again in about two weeks if I don't hear from her.
I think it's a lot of showing them you have other things you can be taken care of. You were actually doing them a favor giving up some of your *important* time to them.
BGC
Master Don Juan
Disco,
Jeez I think this is just about one of the toughest issues in dating -- when to first call a girl.
I've given this an enormous amount of thought over the years. Here's what I arrived at.
1. Almost always at least a week (seven days) before calling (unless, say, she's from out of town and she told you she's leaving in three days -- there are always exceptions....).
2. Never call on a Friday or Saturday (as lone-raider mentioned) -- you're in demand, you're out doing stuff, that's the impression you want to leave. But I would say not to call on Sunday, either, because Sunday is usually the day when people catch up those who are really close, like family and intimate friends. Also, I wouldn't call on Monday, because if you're super, super busy, Monday is the day when you catch up on business stuff that you couldn't get around to over the weekend. So that leaves calling on a Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.
3. Also, never go out with a girl for the first few times on a Friday or Saturday night -- that's when you see chicks you are really into. So that leaves going out on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday -- or Sunday or Monday, but....
4. You should always test their interest level in you by proposing a day near in the future, like one or two days. For instance, you call on a Tuesday and ask her out for Thursday.
5. Call between 6:00 p.m. and 9:00 p.m. Maybe I'm more conservative than some guys here, but I think 9:00 p.m. is still considered the polite cutoff time for calling (that's the time when telemarketers legally must stop calling people).
6. Do not call on your phone. Don't call on your phone, because almost all chicks have caller ID, and you don't want her to see that you've called until you're talking to her. Also, don't set your phone to private call, that's sketchy for a GUY. That's like, in my view, knocking on someone's door with a ski mask on. And so I have long recommended calling on a pay phone.
7. Do not leave a message -- ever. Because you can't ask a girl to call you if you haven't banged yet. Someone might say, well what if she's never in and never answers her phone? Then that's HAPPENING FOR A REASON -- she's screening her calls. I've found that IF A GIRL IS EXCITED ABOUT A GUY SHE HAS MET, SHE WILL PRACTICALLY LIVE FOR DAYS ON END ATTACHED TO HER PHONE WAITING FOR THE GUY TO CALL. If she doesn't pick up, it means she's not living attached to her phone.
8. Do not call more than once per night. Christ, you're busy, you ain't got the time to call more than once per night!
*
So here's a case study.
You get a girl's number at a bar on a Friday.
You wait until not the next Tuesday, but the following Tuesday to call. So eleven days. You call from a pay phone at 7:00 p.m. If no one answers, you hang up.
Try back a week later, on Tuesday. If she still doesn't pick up, try again on Thursday. If she still doesn't pick up, try, say, next Wednesday. But after four calls, forget her. You're busy, you got stuff to do.
*
The thing is this -- the best approach to getting laid on a long-term basis is to work on your reputation. Always cultivate a reputation of being in demand, of having people coming to you, not you going to people. How awesome it would be if you met a girl once and got her number and tried her four times, but no go, and then a year later she sees you in a bar and she was into you at the time, and she'll basically light up when she sees you, AND OTHER CHICKS WILL SEE THIS, AND THEN ALL THE CHICKS IN THE PLACE WILL BE AFTER YOU.
The deal is, if you can get one chick to be mad about you, then others will follow because THE BEST WAY OF GETTING A GIRL INTERESTED IN YOU IS FOR HER TO SEE THAT OTHER CHICKS ARE INTERESTED IN YOU.
--BGC
Jeez I think this is just about one of the toughest issues in dating -- when to first call a girl.
I've given this an enormous amount of thought over the years. Here's what I arrived at.
1. Almost always at least a week (seven days) before calling (unless, say, she's from out of town and she told you she's leaving in three days -- there are always exceptions....).
2. Never call on a Friday or Saturday (as lone-raider mentioned) -- you're in demand, you're out doing stuff, that's the impression you want to leave. But I would say not to call on Sunday, either, because Sunday is usually the day when people catch up those who are really close, like family and intimate friends. Also, I wouldn't call on Monday, because if you're super, super busy, Monday is the day when you catch up on business stuff that you couldn't get around to over the weekend. So that leaves calling on a Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.
3. Also, never go out with a girl for the first few times on a Friday or Saturday night -- that's when you see chicks you are really into. So that leaves going out on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday -- or Sunday or Monday, but....
4. You should always test their interest level in you by proposing a day near in the future, like one or two days. For instance, you call on a Tuesday and ask her out for Thursday.
5. Call between 6:00 p.m. and 9:00 p.m. Maybe I'm more conservative than some guys here, but I think 9:00 p.m. is still considered the polite cutoff time for calling (that's the time when telemarketers legally must stop calling people).
6. Do not call on your phone. Don't call on your phone, because almost all chicks have caller ID, and you don't want her to see that you've called until you're talking to her. Also, don't set your phone to private call, that's sketchy for a GUY. That's like, in my view, knocking on someone's door with a ski mask on. And so I have long recommended calling on a pay phone.
7. Do not leave a message -- ever. Because you can't ask a girl to call you if you haven't banged yet. Someone might say, well what if she's never in and never answers her phone? Then that's HAPPENING FOR A REASON -- she's screening her calls. I've found that IF A GIRL IS EXCITED ABOUT A GUY SHE HAS MET, SHE WILL PRACTICALLY LIVE FOR DAYS ON END ATTACHED TO HER PHONE WAITING FOR THE GUY TO CALL. If she doesn't pick up, it means she's not living attached to her phone.
8. Do not call more than once per night. Christ, you're busy, you ain't got the time to call more than once per night!
*
So here's a case study.
You get a girl's number at a bar on a Friday.
You wait until not the next Tuesday, but the following Tuesday to call. So eleven days. You call from a pay phone at 7:00 p.m. If no one answers, you hang up.
Try back a week later, on Tuesday. If she still doesn't pick up, try again on Thursday. If she still doesn't pick up, try, say, next Wednesday. But after four calls, forget her. You're busy, you got stuff to do.
*
The thing is this -- the best approach to getting laid on a long-term basis is to work on your reputation. Always cultivate a reputation of being in demand, of having people coming to you, not you going to people. How awesome it would be if you met a girl once and got her number and tried her four times, but no go, and then a year later she sees you in a bar and she was into you at the time, and she'll basically light up when she sees you, AND OTHER CHICKS WILL SEE THIS, AND THEN ALL THE CHICKS IN THE PLACE WILL BE AFTER YOU.
The deal is, if you can get one chick to be mad about you, then others will follow because THE BEST WAY OF GETTING A GIRL INTERESTED IN YOU IS FOR HER TO SEE THAT OTHER CHICKS ARE INTERESTED IN YOU.
--BGC
El Campeon 56
Don Juan
BGC, very interesting post indeed. It's obvious you've done quite a bit of thinking about the topic and your ideas are helpful to everyone. What you've said is true, about being busy and all. I'm just not so sure i agree on the whole pay phone aspect. Because first of all who actually calls people on a pay phone these days, it's a little creepy, it might make the girl feel uncertain as to what your intentions are by remaining so far aloof. It also expresses high interest level in the girl you are calling if she does answer, because that will show her you broke from whatever it was you were doing to call her from a pay phone. Thus implying you were thinking about her in your day to day life and could't possibly wait to call her from your own home. Great information about the rest and the info on reputation too.
BGC
Master Don Juan
El Campeon 56,
I know, you're right, this a quality (I think small) of creepiness to calling on a pay phone -- but I think it's just the best of all options. Because until you've banged her, that telephone is a guy's enemy and a girl's best friend -- use it as little as possible.
If she asks about the pay phone, you can just say your cell phone is out.
Because the bottom line is, in my point of view, that you just really really go one down the very moment she sees that you've called.
When you first get her on the phone, that should be the first time that she ever knew you called.
Yet there's the issue of roommates.
If you get her roommate, I say simply say, "Would you tell her X called?" And that's it. No asking her to call you back.
Then you call back in like a month -- because since you've involved her roommate, now there's an added element of emotion and relationship, now her roommate knows you're calling, she knows her roommate knows you calling, you know her roommate knows you're calling, and will you two go out....?
--BGC
PS There is a utopia in this situation. It's if you have access to a phone other than yours and you're guaranteed of no one observing or knowing about your call, and then even that you can only call from that phone once -- like say a business line where you have complete privacy, but that's utopia-esque because it would take so much effort to keep switching locales every time you want to call, whereas a pay phone is pretty easy to hit.
I know, you're right, this a quality (I think small) of creepiness to calling on a pay phone -- but I think it's just the best of all options. Because until you've banged her, that telephone is a guy's enemy and a girl's best friend -- use it as little as possible.
If she asks about the pay phone, you can just say your cell phone is out.
Because the bottom line is, in my point of view, that you just really really go one down the very moment she sees that you've called.
When you first get her on the phone, that should be the first time that she ever knew you called.
Yet there's the issue of roommates.
If you get her roommate, I say simply say, "Would you tell her X called?" And that's it. No asking her to call you back.
Then you call back in like a month -- because since you've involved her roommate, now there's an added element of emotion and relationship, now her roommate knows you're calling, she knows her roommate knows you calling, you know her roommate knows you're calling, and will you two go out....?
--BGC
PS There is a utopia in this situation. It's if you have access to a phone other than yours and you're guaranteed of no one observing or knowing about your call, and then even that you can only call from that phone once -- like say a business line where you have complete privacy, but that's utopia-esque because it would take so much effort to keep switching locales every time you want to call, whereas a pay phone is pretty easy to hit.