What to do with friends you want to bang, but don't want to risk losing as friends?

[One on One]

I've got a female friend who is a really nice and good friend. She isn't that hot, but she's definitely do-able and I want to bang her. The problem is that she's really nice and she's the type of person I want in my life right now and I wouldn't want to lose her as a friend. I'd like to test the waters somehow to see if she'd want to ****. Right now I'd say it's 50-50. She is a goodie-goodie type, but she's open to talk about sex so I think she might do it. How can I broach this without risking losing a friend?

 

[Walden]

Hey dave,

If I were you I'd decide wether I want a shag more than I want a good friend and play whichever I want more.

Remember, baggable skanks are like $6.50 for a palletised carton of ten wheras good friends are hard to come by.

 

[TesuqueRed]

Well said, Walden...

 

[learningtopimp]

I'm feeling you Dave. I think you should remember that you are a DJ, or an aspiring one, and you can get laid whenever you want, and you will score with girls you like, including possibly this girl. BUT ask yourself, if this girl is your friend, is it really worth messing it up? I mean it's not always easy to find a chick you can really be friends with and who will even give you good social proof. So I would say that don't screw her, just don't think about it and hit up tons of other hoez, you can be banging one of them before Saturday I don't kno if a friendship is worth this.

 

[DirkPitt]

this is why i love this site. I always find people in the exact same situation as myself at the exact same time i have it. Makes me feel less special but it also makes me feel more connected...

like i said, i'm in the exact same situation. this girl is decent looking, goodie goodie, talks about sex openly, and is a good friend of mine. HAHA

i'm hoping someone can tell us how we can bang the chick and still be friends, or does the world not work that way, not even for a DJ?

 

[InLawsHateMe]

This situation isn't new...

..I have a friend right now, kinda like yours, she's ok, nice bod, a goodie goodie, can talk sex with me, etc. we bcame really good friends during our divorces. We took comfort in each other, and it lead to sex. Then we were f*ck buddies for awhile, then I started dating others, and that's when things got a little weird. because she wanted a relationship, but I didn't. But thru time, we talked things out, and to this day, we're still very good friends. She talks to me about things she would not usually talk about to her friends, or boyfriends, and that's cool. Life is strange like that.

 

[deeman]

Oh man, I'm in the exact same situation.
There has to be a way to pull it off.

 

[Tantric]

I've been in this situation MANY a time my friend...


Option 1) Do nothing and burry your feelings - you remain friends.

Option 2) Make a move, see where it goes from there. However, you "could" los a friend.

I'm a risk taker, so personally I would kiss her and see what her reaction is, but DON'T do it "out of the blue". DJ her as if you just met her...start kino, flirt more, etc.

Honestly, there isn't anything WRONG in kissing someone you're attracted to, and chances are, you won't ruin a friendship by just one kiss. If she is so turned off and doesn't talk to you anymore, than your friendship didn't mean anything to her anyway. When a girl and guy spend a lot of time together, it is only natural that one (or both) will get attracted to each other, so i'd gof or it.

Afterall, mybe she wants to do you too?

 

[bugsquish]

I have a female best friend (24 like me) who I've known for like 10 years. We kinda saw each other when we were kids but I stopped it cuz she was a bit of a tomboy and we started out as friends anyway.

Well the years have seen this ugly duckling turn into one hot babe (easily an 8) when she's going for a night out. Apparently, I get all hot and bothered when she's dressed up. She discussed this with a mutual friend. We get very flirty and we're all over each other. She loves the attention, but she always says "Bugsquish, I may f*ck you someday - BUT NOT TODAY!". She's been saying this for years. Ah bless her

 

[MrNiceGuy]

tantric, agreed... but option 1 can only lead to more trouble unless you find another girl...

first things first..

If you are attracted to someone you meet, make a move when you meet them!!!

DO NOT become "friends first", thats what AFCs do, its what I used to do, and it lands you in the sh*tty situation you find yourself in... which I too have been in more than once.. its only now I've learnt my lesson.

Secondly, either.. find some other chick to date and that you want to be with, or make a move on your friend..

the longer you go not getting any and still knowing the girl.. the worse and worse it becomes and the more you dread losing her if she rejects you.. get things out in the open as soon as possible.. the longer you leave it the stronger and more obsessive your feelings will become which you dont want, and she sure as hell doesnt either..

If shes otherwise not available (ie she has a boyfriend) then you're in a whole heap of trouble, dont ask me what to do in that situation.