What this girl told me...

[matius]

This girl is in tune with her sexuality. I felt she gave a fair synopsis of the dating situation. We were at a bar packed with college students, mostly frat and sorority people. Many hot women and lots of dumb dlcks. The hotties obviously like the frat kids here...

Her run down was like this. She could go up to the bar and pick out any guy...9 out of 10 times, if she were to say I want to get f()cked tonight, it would happen. Whereas, men have to do their sales pitch and be judged in the face...if she ain't feeling ya, your leaving. This is the majority of the time. Ok, not brain surgery.

But on cold approaches...The attractive women I spoke with about that told me that they would hardly flirt with the idea of hooking up with some guy on a cold approach. Maybe if they were single they might listen, but probably still say no. In fact I mostly got - they would not hook up with a dude from the street no matter what...if she is having a bad day- hand in the face.

It might just be these three but it seems pretty accurate since I've tried dozens and dozens of cold pick-ups to no avail. I'm not so bad looking either. One girl told me that her boyfriend - she has to teach what's going on but finds him cute. While she lusts and f()cks the dude she can't quite get. This guy, doesn't let much of himself out, isn't around all the time and tells her straight up to be careful because he ain't into her like that...dating n shyte. So we got the one guy licking her ankles panting- and the other guy getting his balls sucked because he's in the background chillin.

I still say that's messed up because, if you see someone you are attracted to in a mall, grocery store or wherever- how else might you meet them? I was also told that most relationships are made when there is small banter over a certain period of time. Maybe at school, work or a club or something.

 

[spanky]

Well, I don't do cold approaches as often because they are tough but I do get some success with them.

I still say that's messed up because, if you see someone you are attracted to in a mall, grocery store or wherever- how else might you meet them?

Good point. My 2 cents is:

Who doesn't enjoy a good short conversation? I stop and approach a woman and start talking about whatever's the situation is that I am meeting her in. It's a simple casual conversation, no super duper mack daddy conversation techniques or any thing. She doesn't know what my intentions are but by the time I am ready to end the conversation I will eilict the number.
For example, I saw this woman while I was walking past some outdoor festival last month. She was looking good in a purple dress that fitted her well. I simply made a detour and walked up to her and told her I really liked her dress. She thanked me with a big smile. I asked her about the festival and eventually found out that she went to school for journalism. I then jokingly asked her if she could be one of those journalist who would go onto a battlefield for news coverage. I then went into my exaggerated impression of a news anchorman speaking calmly into a camera while bombs were exploding all around him. She llaughed and then went on and on about her hopes and dreams as a journalist. I just stood and listened while showing the pearly whites the whole time

I finally asked for her number and she almost seemed glad to give it to me. The very first time I talked to her on the phone she was talking about me coming to see her where she goes to school after the summer was over. She didn't even know my last name.
Basically, I think cold approaches can be good if you use your surrounding to jump start the conversation. It is something you two immediately have in common.

 

[akindofblue]

matius, you're dealing with sorority girls here. First, like you said, they have ample access to attractive guys and have a bulit-in social life. Of course they are going to be a bit leary of opening up to outsiders, as they're generally perfectly content as is. You can still break through, but your success if going to vary. Most of these girls don't realize that things are going to get a bit more complicated in the real world. Bottomline: if you're not getting anywhere with normal conversation, you're going to have to make them laugh or make an approach that is a bit unorthodox. An insane question leading into what amounts to a witty but normal conversation seems to work quite well.

Another thing that also works is knowing how to sell yourself. If you're a musician or an artist, you've got the opportunity to differentiate yourself from others, pique her interest, and do it in a casual manner. As for me, I've noticed that my success rate with even the stuck-up sororoity girls has gone waaaaaaaaay up from my undergrad days after becaming a student at a top 10 law school. If you've got the goods, sell away. Girls like that stuff, so long as you're casual about it.

 

[Walden]

Yeah I think meeting women thru moving in the same circles is easily the easiest and best way, but 99% of the women you'll be attracted to , you won't know so you'll have to do a walk-up.

And as spanky said (and as I'm beginning to find through boot camp) , it is possiblt to get it to work for you.

 

[matius]

That's good stuff...

spanky - I like those commando conversation tactics.

Perhaps bottom-line is to in some form or another be unique and try to let her know you've got the goods in a short amount of time. Nobody said it was easy...