What is she playin at?

[JJ007]

Okay....I should no better but I just want opinions/advice!

History so far:

- Known this Korean girl for 6 weeks....she broke up several months ago with B/F who 2-times her...she was madly in love and wanted to marry him.
- Been out a few times...dancing...eating...park etc...so variety involved.
- Helped her out a few times. done her favours she's had money troubles. I leant her some $ and she promptly paid me back as well. So I don't think she's a user. Also when she asked me a few times to help her run errands I've told her I am busy...so I haven't run to her beck and call
- I've let her know that I'm fond of her by using ******** back on her and also tried a bit of kino. been positive but haven't progressed to hand holding....Further been salsa dancing and had positive kinoing but as soon as we leave club...keeps her distance.
- I know in her mind she is suspicious why I have been so nice to her
- I do have several other projects on the go so I'm not just concentrating on her.

So earlier this week she tells me she's doing her birthday party at a girlfriends workshop...about 10 peopl invited including me. She tells me she can't wait for me to meet her friends as she's told them I'm a lovely person.

Party is today (24-9-05)...I txt Happy birthday in the morning and i'm waiting for her to ring me and give me the address. Come 7.00pm...no phonecall...so i ring her...she says no party today and party has been moved to this coming Tue. She says she's been to the shops with some friends and she's back at home with them. Abit noisy in Background so we can't chat properly. She then says batter on cell is a bit low and I say we'll talk later.

I feel I've been brushed off...not sure weather she decided not to invite me to party or party ihas been postponed to tuesday.

So taking heed of advice on SS (and also believing his part of my game needs developing) I txt her 15 min later the following:

"Your very Rude (name)..You invited me to your party..And you don't even have the decency or courtesy to tell me you've had a change of plans...Did you not bother ringing your other friends to say it was cancelled as well!!!? Your behaviour is very disrespectful; I am really dissapointed in you (name), you let me down, I don't like people wasting my time ..."

She replied.. "Sorry nothing to say to you it is my fault."

(NB: Asian english is not perfect as they structure words/sentences slightly diffrent from native speakers)

Further next wek after the party i was going to drop a direct game on her..Basically sit her down, assure her she's special and I care for her and I want more than just friends...But all with the attitude and belief that take it or leave it as I got to move on. Looking into her eyes and being confident and speaking slowly.

So now my questions:

1. I think I should wait till Tuesday to see if she calls me to invite me to her party.

2. If she does then I will drop direct game on her in next few days

3. If she doesn't (she will probably say it is cancelled when i ask her) then drop direct game anyway as I have nothing to loose.

Basically I will force the situation and b willing to loose her as I have other projects.

I feel i must to this as a few of my projects are reaching a stagnation point and I feel that part of my game that is weak is letting these girls get away with flakiness and bad behaviour....SS does mention don't let a girl get a way with disrespectful behaviour.

At least this way she will know she can't mess me about as I am willing to walk away.

Honest opinions are always welcome.

I'm ready!!!

 

[Bible_Belt]

kiss close

 

[averagejoe]

I wouldn't drop direct game on her as you say. I would walk away from her at this point. You don't need to explain why she will figure it out.

 

[Aaron B]

She blew it, if she wants to see you, she is going to have to make it up to you. That should be your frame.

Unfortunately, based on your post it sounds to me like you believe she is the prize, not you. Very difficult to succeed in that circumstance.

Also, sending her a txt *****ing her out was pretty weak. You should have given her all that on the phone, instead you accepted her ****ty excuse for blowing you off. Then you make it worse by sending a txt, which makes it look like you were too much of a wuss to tell her that on the phone.

She already knows she can walk all over you, do you want to stick around for more of the same?

Break contact, date other women and make sure she knows about it. Maybe she'll come sniffing around in the future.

As far as your idea on "direct game": you need to show her these things with your actions, not tell her with your words.

In my experience, you going out with her several times and not kissing her is a sign of low interest from her. If she was really interested in you, she would be dying for some affection from you by now. She's not, and she's not.

 

[NewMan]

Your in the Friend zone.

She tells me she can't wait for me to meet her friends as she's told them I'm a lovely person

uh? a lovely person. That's not what you want her to deascribe you as. Your lovely, cuddely, playfull, and yes, "NICE".

Been out a few times...dancing...eating...park etc...so variety involved.

Should have made a move by now.

Helped her out a few times. done her favours she's had money troubles. I leant her some $ and she promptly paid me back as well. So I don't think she's a user. Also when she asked me a few times to help her run errands I've told her I am busy...so I haven't run to her beck and call

Your so nice.

this is not the kind of thing you want to be doing. CHALLENGE.

Whether you think so or not, you seem to be there for her - there's no wonder she thinks of you as her friend.

Further been salsa dancing and had positive kinoing but as soon as we leave club...keeps her distance.

friend.


After what has just happened, you'd be better off cutting the contact. If she doesn't call you regarding the party (and not helping her to set it up by the way) - then move on.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Damn, NEWMAN beat me to it.

But lets review shall we? You are a "lovely person." This is Korean ******** for "Nice Guy."

You 'loaned' her money. Heheh,...she's comfortable enough with you to ask you to run errands for her.

She wants you to meet "her friends."

And the icing on the whole treat is that she's madly in love with the two-timing Ex, but blows you off for casual birthday party and univites you to the rescheduling of it after she has no answer for you about the first one. All of this after all of the above,..heheh,..you my friend are a:

SURROGATE BOYFRIEND

You'll do everything a normal boyfriend would be expected to do with absolutely no expectation of reciprocation of intimacy on her part whatsoever. Tell him what he's won Johnny,..

Well Rollo, without collecting his testicles and NEXTING this losing proposition, JJ can expect up to six months of wondering just what he's doing 'wrong' with this little honey, putting off all other (and likely better) prospective girls, until she finally gets, back with, or anotherthe two-timing boyfriend whom she'll be madly in love with and want to marry. But as a 'lovely' parting gift we have this years fresh copy of The DJ Bible

Thanks for playing JJ

 

[IronFar]

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
Damn, NEWMAN beat me to it.

But lets review shall we? You are a "lovely person." This is Korean ******** for "Nice Guy."

You 'loaned' her money. Heheh,...she's comfortable enough with you to ask you to run errands for her.

She wants you to meet "her friends."

And the icing on the whole treat is that she's madly in love with the two-timing Ex, but blows you off for casual birthday party and univites you to the rescheduling of it after she has no answer for you about the first one. All of this after all of the above,..heheh,..you my friend are a:

SURROGATE BOYFRIEND

You'll do everything a normal boyfriend would be expected to do with absolutely no expectation of reciprocation of intimacy on her part whatsoever. Tell him what he's won Johnny,..

Well Rollo, without collecting his testicles and NEXTING this losing proposition, JJ can expect up to six months of wondering just what he's doing 'wrong' with this little honey, putting off all other (and likely better) prospective girls, until she finally gets, back with, or anotherthe two-timing boyfriend whom she'll be madly in love with and want to marry. But as a 'lovely' parting gift we have this years fresh copy of The DJ Bible

Thanks for playing JJ

:rockon:

Good Posting. OP doesn't know he is in this situation unfortunately.

AFC in denial =