OnTheWayUp
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 13, 2010
- Messages
- 321
- Reaction score
- 9
Hey all,
I started reading PUA material as a clueless virgin just over a year ago now, and the effect it has had on my life has been incredible to say the least. However, whilst I am a great fan of theory and reading about pickup, there is no doubt that it is no substitute for practice in the field. I have been out in the last 10 months more than in my entire life put together, and have learnt a vast amount about what turns women on, how to make a good first impression, how to make interesting conversation, and the logistics of taking a girl home etc
This post is a collection of things that have worked for me this year in the field. I am aware that many of the tips are closely related to material which you can already find on here, but this post is as much a way for me to summarise my own thoughts from the experience of the past year as it is meant to help other up and coming PUAs. Feel free to comment/ disagree if something different has worked for you. Enjoy.
1) Being direct and escalating as fast as logistics will permit has been a real discovery for me over the last few months. I have never had a girl walk away because of escalating too quickly- this is true of anywhere in the pickup process from initial kino to putting her hand on my c*** in my bedroom. Conversely, there have been a couple of girls this year who went cold on me after showing loads of IOIs when we first met. I am convinced that one of the reasons for this was that they got bored of our interactions because I didn't move things on quickly enough. I can remember one particular occasion sitting in a club having isolated a girl from her friends where I knew that I had to make a move, but could not make myself man up and do it. On another occasion, I had two girls alone in one of their rooms at 2am talking about threesomes, and didn't make a move. Never again will I make this mistake.
2) Field experience allows you to develop a kind of sixth sense for which girls are going to ****block you. These ****blockers are best dealt with by a skilful wingman, but equally you should not be afraid to walk away if you are getting IOIs from a target with fewer obstacles, or if you feel that occupying them will simply be too much work.
3) Never go down on a girl before she goes down on you. Why reward her before she invests in the budding relationship? I can think of 2 occasions this year where I went down on a girl during foreplay and this was never reciprocated because either a) I never saw her again after that night or b) the "relationship" petered out. Having a sexual balance of power which favours you (or, even better, both partners equally) is the way forward.
4) Only once have I managed to pull from a club after dancing for more than 45 minutes with a girl (and in that particular case, other logistics were VERY favourable). All the other times, the girl turned out to be an AW who was happy to make out for an hour or more but didn't want anything more. There comes a time in any pickup where you have to be prepared to bounce the girl out of the dance venue to see if she is DTF or not. Further escalation requires isolation, most often at your place or her's.
5) Do not stand for game-playing after a number exchange, or after one date which is not particularly successful. You are a man, and as such your time is too valuable to be wasted by flakey girls who reply to texts 12 hours after they're sent, or who constantly cancel on you. I've read about the two strike rule on here, but there are so many attractive girls around that these days I give a girl one chance to show up to a date then simply delete her. This is assuming I "date" in the proper sense at all; I have had far more success hooking up on a casual basis from parties- see below.
6) Neediness is a game-killer. A couple of months ago, I made out with a hot Polish girl with whom I had barely spoken before in a club. We danced for 40 minutes or so- it was hot. When it came to about 3.30am and I was looking to go home, she declined my invitation to go and eat something together. I was horny and didn't want to give up, so followed her and her friends out of the club for about 100m, trying to persuade my Polish girl to "come and eat" with me. Persistence is generally good, but needy persistence leads to failing. She hasn't spoken to me since.
7) The single most important consideration in pickup logistics is plausible deniability: the art of giving your girl a way to say to her friends that "she came back to that guy's room for breakfast" and "it just happened." As a man, you have to be prepared to take full responsibilty for the pickup in order to eliminate ASD (anti-slut defence), otherwise the girl will think you only want to take her home for sex. Asking a girl if she's up for "food," "breakfast," "seeing my posters," "seeing a video on youtube" (one relevant to our conversation) are all approaches that have worked for me.
8) If a girl is alone with you in your room or her's after 11pm, she is DTF. It is as simple as that. Don't do what I did back in December and not make a move when a Belgian girl invited herself over to my place at 10:30pm "for help with translation." It means nothing if she has a bf, or if she strikes you as the innocent, non-sexual type. If you find her attractive, make a move! On another occasion, I bounced a pretty Argentine girl (8.5, with a bf) from a house party back to my place at midnight, after she chose to "walk in the same direction." I did not make a move and let her leave after 10 minutes. Fail, yes- but I've learned my lesson.
9) Find your "type" of girl. I'm studying in a very international environment atm, and have found that I have most success with blonde girls from Poland and Germany aged between 18-24 (I'm 21) who like music and are slightly alternative/ hippy. I find myself most attracted to that physical type, and that's the group that's given me the most action. Your type might be completely different to mine- but it's well worth identifying through field experience.
10) Conventional "dating," where you go out for a drink/ meal/ cinema/ play sport, has been infinitely less successful for me than hookup culture at parties. This may well be a function of my age (21) and my occupation (student), but for the time being I'm sticking to the format where I've had most success. I've (at least) made out with 10 different girls over the last 10 months; not one of those girls I dated officially.
11) Find the venue in your city that suits your style the best. I have now pulled from all the major clubs in my city, but my success rate is more than twice as high at one club in particular. Because my game style focusses more on talking rather than dancing, I do especially well in this one club which has extensive seating areas away from the loud music, darts, a table tennis table, a table football table and a playstation! Use field experience to find what works for you and stick to it.
12) Do not tolerate girls distracting themselves from the pickup with their phones. You are a man and the girl is privileged that you are giving her the time of day to talk to her. Tell her once that it is rude to text when you are talking to someone else (especially someone you've just met!). If she disobeys, be prepared to leave. There are plenty of other attractive girls you can talk to.
13) Do not induce ASD by talking too openly about past sexual experiences, about past conquests, or about being a player. This is especially true before you have slept with a girl for the first time. I remember one occasion back in April where I went to a party 500m away from my flat, spat awesome game, bounced a friend of a friend back to mine, and got her naked in about 90 minutes. This girl was a slut: she even said as much herself: "guys always just want to have sex with me and nothing else." However, I induced ASD by bragging about prior conquests and showing them to her on FB! What I was thinking, I have no idea... The girl left after being briefly fingered. Even if you are a player (or aspire to be one
), it is far classier to hint at being so using allusions and subtle humour than to brag about your sexual past in a brazen way. Probing questions about (for example) "how many girls you've slept with" are to be deflected rather than answered directly.
14) Do not underestimate the power of social proof. I am known as a very social guy in my circle of friends and acquaintances. At my age, this means someone who knows a lot of people and goes to a lot of parties. When I arrive at a venue alone, which is something I've experimented with, I can typically find someone I have met at a party within 10 minutes. This gives you SUCH an advantage: it is so much easier to pull a friend of a friend (of a friend, etc etc) rather than to meet somebody completely new. Always maintain your social proof by going out regularly and talking to as many people in as many different settings as possible. Arriving at parties surrounded by a group of hot girls (preferably holding their hands) feels so awesome and makes you look like a king! Being "the popular guy" who introduces one set of people to another is also gold.
15) Find a k-close routine that works for you. This is a great way of reducing nerves when it comes to making a move, and a way of reducing the probability that you pvssy out and do nothing. We are men: we feel comfortable doing things which are routine. I find the Mystery k-close where you hold the girl's hands and play the trust game (illustrated on the show "The Pickup Artist") very helpful. At the time of writing, its success rate for me is 2/2.
I started reading PUA material as a clueless virgin just over a year ago now, and the effect it has had on my life has been incredible to say the least. However, whilst I am a great fan of theory and reading about pickup, there is no doubt that it is no substitute for practice in the field. I have been out in the last 10 months more than in my entire life put together, and have learnt a vast amount about what turns women on, how to make a good first impression, how to make interesting conversation, and the logistics of taking a girl home etc
This post is a collection of things that have worked for me this year in the field. I am aware that many of the tips are closely related to material which you can already find on here, but this post is as much a way for me to summarise my own thoughts from the experience of the past year as it is meant to help other up and coming PUAs. Feel free to comment/ disagree if something different has worked for you. Enjoy.
1) Being direct and escalating as fast as logistics will permit has been a real discovery for me over the last few months. I have never had a girl walk away because of escalating too quickly- this is true of anywhere in the pickup process from initial kino to putting her hand on my c*** in my bedroom. Conversely, there have been a couple of girls this year who went cold on me after showing loads of IOIs when we first met. I am convinced that one of the reasons for this was that they got bored of our interactions because I didn't move things on quickly enough. I can remember one particular occasion sitting in a club having isolated a girl from her friends where I knew that I had to make a move, but could not make myself man up and do it. On another occasion, I had two girls alone in one of their rooms at 2am talking about threesomes, and didn't make a move. Never again will I make this mistake.
2) Field experience allows you to develop a kind of sixth sense for which girls are going to ****block you. These ****blockers are best dealt with by a skilful wingman, but equally you should not be afraid to walk away if you are getting IOIs from a target with fewer obstacles, or if you feel that occupying them will simply be too much work.
3) Never go down on a girl before she goes down on you. Why reward her before she invests in the budding relationship? I can think of 2 occasions this year where I went down on a girl during foreplay and this was never reciprocated because either a) I never saw her again after that night or b) the "relationship" petered out. Having a sexual balance of power which favours you (or, even better, both partners equally) is the way forward.
4) Only once have I managed to pull from a club after dancing for more than 45 minutes with a girl (and in that particular case, other logistics were VERY favourable). All the other times, the girl turned out to be an AW who was happy to make out for an hour or more but didn't want anything more. There comes a time in any pickup where you have to be prepared to bounce the girl out of the dance venue to see if she is DTF or not. Further escalation requires isolation, most often at your place or her's.
5) Do not stand for game-playing after a number exchange, or after one date which is not particularly successful. You are a man, and as such your time is too valuable to be wasted by flakey girls who reply to texts 12 hours after they're sent, or who constantly cancel on you. I've read about the two strike rule on here, but there are so many attractive girls around that these days I give a girl one chance to show up to a date then simply delete her. This is assuming I "date" in the proper sense at all; I have had far more success hooking up on a casual basis from parties- see below.
6) Neediness is a game-killer. A couple of months ago, I made out with a hot Polish girl with whom I had barely spoken before in a club. We danced for 40 minutes or so- it was hot. When it came to about 3.30am and I was looking to go home, she declined my invitation to go and eat something together. I was horny and didn't want to give up, so followed her and her friends out of the club for about 100m, trying to persuade my Polish girl to "come and eat" with me. Persistence is generally good, but needy persistence leads to failing. She hasn't spoken to me since.
7) The single most important consideration in pickup logistics is plausible deniability: the art of giving your girl a way to say to her friends that "she came back to that guy's room for breakfast" and "it just happened." As a man, you have to be prepared to take full responsibilty for the pickup in order to eliminate ASD (anti-slut defence), otherwise the girl will think you only want to take her home for sex. Asking a girl if she's up for "food," "breakfast," "seeing my posters," "seeing a video on youtube" (one relevant to our conversation) are all approaches that have worked for me.
8) If a girl is alone with you in your room or her's after 11pm, she is DTF. It is as simple as that. Don't do what I did back in December and not make a move when a Belgian girl invited herself over to my place at 10:30pm "for help with translation." It means nothing if she has a bf, or if she strikes you as the innocent, non-sexual type. If you find her attractive, make a move! On another occasion, I bounced a pretty Argentine girl (8.5, with a bf) from a house party back to my place at midnight, after she chose to "walk in the same direction." I did not make a move and let her leave after 10 minutes. Fail, yes- but I've learned my lesson.
9) Find your "type" of girl. I'm studying in a very international environment atm, and have found that I have most success with blonde girls from Poland and Germany aged between 18-24 (I'm 21) who like music and are slightly alternative/ hippy. I find myself most attracted to that physical type, and that's the group that's given me the most action. Your type might be completely different to mine- but it's well worth identifying through field experience.
10) Conventional "dating," where you go out for a drink/ meal/ cinema/ play sport, has been infinitely less successful for me than hookup culture at parties. This may well be a function of my age (21) and my occupation (student), but for the time being I'm sticking to the format where I've had most success. I've (at least) made out with 10 different girls over the last 10 months; not one of those girls I dated officially.
11) Find the venue in your city that suits your style the best. I have now pulled from all the major clubs in my city, but my success rate is more than twice as high at one club in particular. Because my game style focusses more on talking rather than dancing, I do especially well in this one club which has extensive seating areas away from the loud music, darts, a table tennis table, a table football table and a playstation! Use field experience to find what works for you and stick to it.
12) Do not tolerate girls distracting themselves from the pickup with their phones. You are a man and the girl is privileged that you are giving her the time of day to talk to her. Tell her once that it is rude to text when you are talking to someone else (especially someone you've just met!). If she disobeys, be prepared to leave. There are plenty of other attractive girls you can talk to.
13) Do not induce ASD by talking too openly about past sexual experiences, about past conquests, or about being a player. This is especially true before you have slept with a girl for the first time. I remember one occasion back in April where I went to a party 500m away from my flat, spat awesome game, bounced a friend of a friend back to mine, and got her naked in about 90 minutes. This girl was a slut: she even said as much herself: "guys always just want to have sex with me and nothing else." However, I induced ASD by bragging about prior conquests and showing them to her on FB! What I was thinking, I have no idea... The girl left after being briefly fingered. Even if you are a player (or aspire to be one
), it is far classier to hint at being so using allusions and subtle humour than to brag about your sexual past in a brazen way. Probing questions about (for example) "how many girls you've slept with" are to be deflected rather than answered directly.14) Do not underestimate the power of social proof. I am known as a very social guy in my circle of friends and acquaintances. At my age, this means someone who knows a lot of people and goes to a lot of parties. When I arrive at a venue alone, which is something I've experimented with, I can typically find someone I have met at a party within 10 minutes. This gives you SUCH an advantage: it is so much easier to pull a friend of a friend (of a friend, etc etc) rather than to meet somebody completely new. Always maintain your social proof by going out regularly and talking to as many people in as many different settings as possible. Arriving at parties surrounded by a group of hot girls (preferably holding their hands) feels so awesome and makes you look like a king! Being "the popular guy" who introduces one set of people to another is also gold.
15) Find a k-close routine that works for you. This is a great way of reducing nerves when it comes to making a move, and a way of reducing the probability that you pvssy out and do nothing. We are men: we feel comfortable doing things which are routine. I find the Mystery k-close where you hold the girl's hands and play the trust game (illustrated on the show "The Pickup Artist") very helpful. At the time of writing, its success rate for me is 2/2.