What do you guys thinking about meditation and accepting yourself?

nelysses

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 28, 2023
Messages
321
Reaction score
40
Age
21
I saw a channel on YouTube. There was a man who had been dealing with the game for years and sold mentorship for it.
Now he changes his whole concept and shoots meditation videos. And he says he's happier now.
“If you want to be with women, you should focus on self-acceptance rather than personal development,” he says.
According to him, of course we will work for our wishes. But the essence of the event and happiness is to accept yourself in this way and not feel deficient.
He says that in this way, we become happier and more self-confident. What do you think about this?

Do you think it's a new perspective on the classic "Be better, have better quality and sleep with more women" argument, or is it a fallacy?
 

nelysses

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 28, 2023
Messages
321
Reaction score
40
Age
21
"Advice to "be yourself" does not work because you cannot accept or love yourself as you are. While many people out there who have not developed themselves enough are sleeping with girls, you are still jerking off."

he has thoughts like this.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
5,514
Reaction score
4,665
Well, if you don't love yourself, how can you love other people?
 

Vending Machine Veteran

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 30, 2024
Messages
281
Reaction score
181
Age
39
I tried meditation. I decided it was for the birds (useless).

I have an overactive mind, right? I was trying to silence it.

Then I thought about all of my ancestors before me, that certainly had overactive minds.

An overactive mind got us this far

Who am i to subvert evolution in such a gay way?
 

Vending Machine Veteran

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 30, 2024
Messages
281
Reaction score
181
Age
39
If my grandpa could suffer through it without air-conditioning, microwaves, oil change places, grocery stores lol what a beast

I reckon i can too
 

oOh Nasty

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 23, 2002
Messages
1,104
Reaction score
303
Age
38
Personal development pros: Focusing and having goals on yourself usually results in a better life.
Personal development cons: Most people don't have the discipline to follow through with their goals and can't make lasting changes to their habits. It's easy to fall into the trap of consuming lots of "hustle and grind" content whilst doing nothing. Most importantly, lots of dudes who go this route don't feel worthy of themselves unless they accomplish x and y, and therefore won't go out and approach. They'll "wait until they've progressed" enough in personal development before doing the things that matter.

Self-acceptance pros: "Naturals" are usually this. People who have a high level of self-acceptance are usually more IDGAF and stoic, and therefore more attractive to women. They're usually also more happy and have less cortisone in their bodies.
Self-acceptance cons: The other side of this coin is a very dark and disgusting one. It's cool to be IDGAF, until you DGAF about your own hygiene, health, social skills, finances, etc.

In my opinion, you have to have a good balance of both. You need to find a way to be cool as ****, while still having a general goal. The "self-acceptance" **** is the female part of you and the "being" and "present-moment" bla bla bla zen etc..., while "personal development" is goal-oriented and stressful.

If you have too much of one, then it's not good. If anyone has followed red pill stuff, then Fresh and Fit is probably a good example of way too much "personal-development" hustle-and-grind mindset and not enough stone-cold coolness. Dude went crazy on air and started talking non-sense and got himself cancelled. On the other hand...while the "self-acceptance" mindset is less popular, there are some really cool dudes that just come off as very natural and don't take things too seriously...and are highly desired by the mass majority of women: Mads Mikkelsen and Henry Cavill are good examples. Yeah...they're celebrities, but they'd probably still be attractive to women even if they weren't.

Edit: I wanted to add that, the reason why self-acceptance is sometimes successful, is because you're able to get yourself into a mindset where you feel like you are worthy and deserving of everything and all women. People go through their "working on themselves" period because they don't feel like they deserve the hot chicks that they desire. And I have this theory that the mindset that you achieve, just short of reaching hubris, is more important in being attractive to women than the material successes that one gains through personal development. So in short, use whichever method can make you have uncontrollable sincere confidence in knowing that every woman wants to f*ck you.
 
Last edited:

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,419
Reaction score
3,620
I'm might entertain ASMR videos, especially the ones that deal with positive affirmations, which tend towards a quasi-meditation/self-acceptance approach. If you are self-accepting then you are not as much invested in validation seeking behaviour because you are dealing with the core issues of wanting acceptance, feeling worthy of love, or being good enough. Whereas, self-improvement might be ego-driven validation seeking behaviour where you are trying to make yourself worthy of finding and experiencing love. The problem with self-improvement is there is always someone who can out-alpha you and is just better than you are no matter how much you improve yourself.
At the very least, I ASMR as quasi-meditative self-acceptance concepts make you feel good and chill, and if you can't get that from a real women, at least you are getting it from a video of one.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
5,514
Reaction score
4,665
I fall asleep meditating.
Not all meditating is in 'zazen', sitting still.

I meditate while doing Japanese swordsmanship and motorcycling.
 

nelysses

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 28, 2023
Messages
321
Reaction score
40
Age
21
You already know what you need to do to start getting good with women.

Why do you keep looking for ways around that?
I think it's more laziness than fear.

It's a lot easier to meditate and pretend you're gonna get some "cheat codes" for women, rather than go out and talk to them.
As you can see from the title of the thread, it wasn't just for girls.
In general, I think I could be better at many things, and at this point, life always feels like a hustle and bustle.
I keep trying to say that his X is better than me, and when this happens, one cannot like the things he does. It feels like I'm looking at others and trying to be #1 rather than focusing on myself and doing my best.
At this point all my research is focused on meditation, faith, etc. comes out.
I wonder if meditation helps.

In fact, I don't even spend 20 minutes a day on this site. So you don't even see 1/72 of my size. I'm not as focused on women as you think. In fact, I can say that I only visit the site when I think of women. On the one hand, it is fine, but on the other hand, it is sad.
It's like masturbating your conscience instead of going and meeting women.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
2,175
Reaction score
690
Location
Wilmington, DE
As you can see from the title of the thread, it wasn't just for girls.
In general, I think I could be better at many things, and at this point, life always feels like a hustle and bustle.
I keep trying to say that his X is better than me, and when this happens, one cannot like the things he does. It feels like I'm looking at others and trying to be #1 rather than focusing on myself and doing my best.
At this point all my research is focused on meditation, faith, etc. comes out.
I wonder if meditation helps.

In fact, I don't even spend 20 minutes a day on this site. So you don't even see 1/72 of my size. I'm not as focused on women as you think. In fact, I can say that I only visit the site when I think of women. On the one hand, it is fine, but on the other hand, it is sad.
It's like masturbating your conscience instead of going and meeting women.
You really can solve 99% of your problems by going to the gym, and talking to girls in person until you grow out of your awkwardness to get some social awareness.

It is that simple.

Maybe not easy.

But it really is that simple.
 
Top