What culture are you creating in this forum?

[Outlaw_]

Ok fellas. It's time to air some dirty laundry. I've been part of this board for about a year now. When I signed up...I was just picking up the shell of myself off the ground from being in a 5 year LTR.

Over that year on this board I've noticed something. Now, you may have been on this forum since before the internet was invented & have your post count at infinity & not give a fvck about what I'm about to say. And that is fine. For everyone else read on.

I've notice that the culture here is to try to make people feel stupid for asking certain questions. Now I'm not saying this is always the case, because I've seen some really supportive dudes here. And I get it, if you've been here forever & someone asks the same question that's been answered "infinity" times...it's annoying.

And I also get it that the biggest peeve is that no one is reading the DJ Bible. But instead of smacking people upside the head...it takes as much energy to simply support these cats who don't have the level of game that some of us have.

Also, I get it...some people are just grumpy old men. But this is the mature man section & it's time for some grumpy old men to grow the fvck up and build someone up instead of trying to tear them down.

Go look at how rowdy lap dogs are & then go look at how calm big dogs are. Big dogs are confident in themselves that they don't have to bark at any & everything. If you do that on a simple discussion board...I wonder what you are like in real life.

Demeaning people is a characteristic of a poor leader. I use the game to improve myself as a man. Be a leader, not a ____. You could spend that energy making this community better...which will make you & your game better. Birds of a feather...

Just my thoughts guys.

Outlaw

 

[logicallefty]

IMO there is not as much negativity here as other Internet sites but there is still more than needed sometimes. I see giving a guy some slack for posting questions that seem dumb but on the other hand the post I just saw about meeting up with a married woman yeah throw that guy to the wolves.

 

[jimjam]

Right on! Agree 100 percent

 

[mangotot]

What you see is pretty much the case in all pickup related forums

 

[sodbuster]

Any place where you aren't face to face has that.... Since it's hard to tell the fat 40 yr olds living in their parent's basement from the guys who have their act together, they feel safe tossing out barbs to make themselves feel superior SOMEWHERE in their life.

BUT part of being a man is not giving a rat's azz about what some stranger on the net has to say....

 

[Night-hawk]

^I second that.

Criticism - Support - Challenge - Praise. I'd say these are tenets of good counsel.

It's better to assume/have an attentive ear when the sounds are harsh than an unfocused ear to pleasantries.

 

[Vulpine]

Criticism - Support - Challenge - Praise. I'd say these are tenets of good counsel.

It's better to assume/have an attentive ear when the sounds are harsh than an unfocused ear to pleasantries.

Word.

A lot of new posters come on and see a forum of questions with answers and just jump right in. How many folks read the "boring" stickied rules and guidelines at the top of the forums? Couple this with the milenial generation (whose thought process only gets as far as discovering they have a question) that has grown up with Google, and you have a lot of un-searching posters who have no idea there is actually a DJ bible. "Why read until I find an answer when I can just ask my question and have it answered?" That's fine, but they aren't asking the questions they need to be. I know that I had answers to questions (that I didn't even know I should be asking) given to me by the DJB.

Becoming a Don Juan requires a personal evolution and effort. We know there are no "magic bullet" one-liners to fix an AFC's problems. They have to do the work themselves to take what medicine they need.

No, Outlaw_, handing someone a fish doesn't teach them to fish. They'll stay hungry and beg for more fish. AFC's beg for fish and Milenials beg for answers. They've found the water, but aren't drinking it. Whatever led them here, they know there is water all around. Yet, they'll complain about being thirsty and not drink from the fountain of knowledge. Me! MemememememMEME! It's a sickening sort of entitlement. It seems like you are advocating that we help men that won't help themselves. Well, Sir, just as there is no sense in dating an un-datable, there is no sense in teaching those that don't care to learn.

Sometimes a slap in the face with a pull cord is just the primer one needs to get them to get their motor running. "Oh, hey... I can just pull this?" Fixing your problems yourself yields a better feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction than does calling up the specialist to fix problems for you.

Go look at how rowdy lap dogs are & then go look at how calm big dogs are. Big dogs are confident in themselves that they don't have to bark at any & everything. If you do that on a simple discussion board...I wonder what you are like in real life.

Big dogs bite fast and hard, sooner than later, sometimes without even getting up. Get with the pack, in your place, or get out of the pack. No barking, you're right: actions not words. Puppies start at the bottom until they get their own pack. They learn to hunt and feed themselves after having been fed. They study, then emulate, then succeed on their own.

... but not after taking some necessary bites.

I don't recall which way it went for me. I may have read the DJ Bible after being told to do so, or, after having read someone else get tooled to do so. Perhaps I proactively wanted to avoid being tooled (or tooled again)?

 

[KarmaSutra]

Post counts, reputation points, and forum popularity each lead to a specific, negative ending: masturbation. Circle-jerks and salivating with hand-in-mouth become the norm as these morons pick which popular poster-child they're slaving themselves to.

Cuckoldry to non-proven turds, the likes of whom have little (or none whatsoever) experience with relationship enlightenment through heartache, terrors, then coming through that experience as a rite-of passage. Instead, it's much more convenient to take the lesser-traveled route by sucking at the teet of he-who's-rep-points-make-him-seem-learned. This senseless following metastasizes itself as a cancerous faux liberation, or lends the weak-minded to believing it's a lesson in self-defilement, which he's earned.

The Millenials are the new baby-boomers. What I know, one of the things I know to my core, is this: the older I get, the more I realize I "know" little.

But. What I do know, I've learned from getting off my azz and putting myself in situations, through experiences, I knew would hurt. However much it hurt, in the end, I gained that fat then turned it to muscle-memory.

 

[Outlaw_]

Any place where you aren't face to face has that.... Since it's hard to tell the fat 40 yr olds living in their parent's basement from the guys who have their act together, they feel safe tossing out barbs to make themselves feel superior SOMEWHERE in their life.

BUT part of being a man is not giving a rat's azz about what some stranger on the net has to say....

Don't get me wrong. I'm all for some man love now. Some dudes even need to be punched in the chest, just so they can stop being a pvssy. There is a way to do that without demeaning a person. Some dudes that do it really look LSE IMO...not from judgement, but as you're saying sod...it's something to make them swell up I guess.

Criticism - Support - Challenge - Praise. I'd say these are tenets of good counsel.

It's better to assume/have an attentive ear when the sounds are harsh than an unfocused ear to pleasantries.

Night-hawk...you're right, criticism can go a long way in this game. Because a woman will take no merci on that azz if she gets her shot. So, I like your concept of good balance.

 

[( . )( . )]

What culture are you creating in this forum?

Rape culture?

 

[Outlaw_]

A lot of new posters come on and see a forum of questions with answers and just jump right in. How many folks read the "boring" stickied rules and guidelines at the top of the forums? Couple this with the milenial generation (whose thought process only gets as far as discovering they have a question) that has grown up with Google, and you have a lot of un-searching posters who have no idea there is actually a DJ bible. "Why read until I find an answer when I can just ask my question and have it answered?" That's fine, but they aren't asking the questions they need to be. I know that I had answers to questions (that I didn't even know I should be asking) given to me by the DJB.

Hey different people learn differently bro. Some people can read it & go put it in the practice. Some people need to go out & just fall on their face until they get it right. Others need a pimp like you to give them instructions, because they will listen & put it into practice.

Becoming a Don Juan requires a personal evolution and effort. We know there are no "magic bullet" one-liners to fix an AFC's problems. They have to do the work themselves to take what medicine they need.

Not everyone wants to be a DJ. Mainly because it's the person who you have to become inside. Not everyone has that killer instinct that you do.

No, Outlaw_, handing someone a fish doesn't teach them to fish. They'll stay hungry and beg for more fish. AFC's beg for fish and Milenials beg for answers. They've found the water, but aren't drinking it. Whatever led them here, they know there is water all around. Yet, they'll complain about being thirsty and not drink from the fountain of knowledge. Me! MemememememMEME! It's a sickening sort of entitlement. It seems like you are advocating that we help men that won't help themselves. Well, Sir, just as there is no sense in dating an un-datable, there is no sense in teaching those that don't care to learn.

Sometimes a slap in the face with a pull cord is just the primer one needs to get them to get their motor running. "Oh, hey... I can just pull this?" Fixing your problems yourself yields a better feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction than does calling up the specialist to fix problems for you.

Like I said above, different people learn differently. I know that's a tough one to grasp because I learned the way you are describing...but it's not for everyone's learning style.

 

[Outlaw_]

Post counts, reputation points, and forum popularity each lead to a specific, negative ending: masturbation. Circle-jerks and salivating with hand-in-mouth become the norm as these morons pick which popular poster-child they're slaving themselves to.

Cuckoldry to non-proven turds, the likes of whom have little (or none whatsoever) experience with relationship enlightenment through heartache, terrors, then coming through that experience as a rite-of passage. Instead, it's much more convenient to take the lesser-traveled route by sucking at the teet of he-who's-rep-points-make-him-seem-learned. This senseless following metastasizes itself as a cancerous faux liberation, or lends the weak-minded to believing it's a lesson in self-defilement, which he's earned.

The Millenials are the new baby-boomers. What I know, one of the things I know to my core, is this: the older I get, the more I realize I "know" little.

But. What I do know, I've learned from getting off my azz and putting myself in situations, through experiences, I knew would hurt. However much it hurt, in the end, I gained that fat then turned it to muscle-memory.

I can't wait to pick up a copy of MANtality if it's anything like this post!