Weird First Date

[Paris1968]

Met a girl last Friday, sexy little number, law student - played some pool, kino off the hook both coming and going, wanted to see her again. Took action and closed the deal, got her number, set up a thing to play bar trivia w/her and her friends last night. Called and left a message to confirm, she texted me back twice, saying "yes! absolutely, can't wait" - and then next day "trivia is at 7, didn't recall if I told you."

Get there and the vibe is WEIRD. Not like the other night at all. First of all all her friends and her freakin' DAD are there. She apologizes, says "I'm so sorry, didn't realize he was coming." I didn't care. I just wanted to kill some Foster's and get to know this girl.

Except I really didn't. It was WEIRD. Not at all like the other vibe. And I'm hesitant to write it off as her dad. He was way at the other end of this huge table. Her friends chatted me up more than she did. It was like I was her freakin' brother or something.

Funny thing, one of her friends said they'd been out Monday and she'd mentioned me and that she'd had fun Friday and was looking forward to trivia, blah blah blah. But NOTHING, bros. NO game.

I get it, fine, I don't care, I had a great time and I'm going right back into the pool. Not sure yet if I'll call her and set up something else. There are too many women out there who will blow my doors off, to waste time on one who doesn't seem to want to.

What I can't figure out is if her disinterest was as high as I was feelin' last evening - she had EVERY opportunity to bail, for 4-5 days, and I wouldn't have been the wiser, nor wasted her time.

Any thoughts? Women. Wow. Still, worth it to get back in. I challenged myself for the first time in ages and it felt great. But not sure I wanna pursue this one very far.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

How old are you?

 

[Iceberg]

Hence the hatred I have for group dates. You spend the entire date trying to figure out your role in the situation.

Well, there's nothing you can do but wait a few days and ask her to hang 1-on-1. If she rejects, or counteroffers with a new group date, then you know she's not interested.

 

[topcat2001]

Women are crazy and unpredictable and thats why we love them and spend so much time analyzing them. But stop looking for answers. A thousand things could have happened these things all affect their feelings much more than it does for a guy. Maybe her dog ate her homework. Would knowing that make you better or help you with the next girl? The only lesson to take from this is maybe that group dates have a low chance of success and in this case this wasnt even a group date. Just a hanging out.

 

[window]

"set up a thing to play bar trivia w/her and her friends last night"

See this is the problem. She set this up, not you. You called her up to ask her out. And somehow you fell into her frame of the group date with her friends. When you rang her you should have had a plan for just you and her. Never accept a chicks beta bait of the group date, especially if she sais no to your offer.

 

[Pair A Dice]

"set up a thing to play bar trivia w/her and her friends last night"

See this is the problem. She set this up, not you. You called her up to ask her out. And somehow you fell into her frame of the group date with her friends. When you rang her you should have had a plan for just you and her. Never accept a chicks beta bait of the group date, especially if she sais no to your offer.

This.

 

[pdx1138]

I don't see what the big deal is.

she likely didn't want to be doing kino, flirty in front of every one.

the 4th date I had with the girl I'm currently seeing went like this, her dad was not around but her brother was. I too was beginning to wonder, but after they left when the trivia was over she began the flirting. That was 2 months ago. We're still at it and she wants sex from me every time we hang out.

 

[The Duke]

I've been in similiar situations a few times and have learned that girls like this are not the ones for me and usually end up being a waste of time.

They almost always seem to throw the "group" date thing on you at the last minute. They do this for a variety of reasons. Some lack social confidence so they need to bring their support group with them. I don't want a girl that lacks social confidence! I want a girl that is strong enough to function by herself and doesn't need propped up by her friends. A person's actions speak volumes of their personality and are a great indicator as to what kind of person they are.

They also pull the "group" date thing when their comfort & interest level in you is not high enough. They look at it like hey.......if this guy is lame, then at least I'll have my friends here to save me and I won't feel bad and have a bad night. My friends can salvage the evening for me! I won't go home with low self esteem again!

Here's another thing to consider......when you choose the "group" date you not only have to impress her, but also her friends. You also have to "entertain" her & her friends. Her friends carry a lot of weight. Its about like having to deal with multiple bosses.

In the end every girl I've done the group date thing with has ended up being a waste of time. Its really just another alternative to flaking. Yes I've had successful group dates, but it comes down to her interest wasn't strong enough to last in the long run.

If you have this game figured out and you've got other options, definitely go that route. If you are still learning and don't have a lot of options, then go for it. It will help you get better in social settings and you'll get more girls as a result.

 

[st_99]

never been on a group date pre sex with a girl. to me, I think it would
be kind of weird because you may be slipping into more a friendly vibe.

 

[blueeyedgent]

The only thing that should be done with women in groups is an orgy LOL

 

[Kailex]

Get there and the vibe is WEIRD. Not like the other night at all. First of all all her friends and her freakin' DAD are there.

What'd you expect?

The man whose penis she came out of was there at her "second date".