Was perusing through a bridal magazine

[MatureDJ]

Of course there were tons of pics of absolutely gorgeous brides (and grooms), pics of cakes, flowers, etc. There were some pics of loving couples looking at each other longingly, etc.

But there seemed to be some pics of couples together with an expanded context not directly related to the marriage ceremony. It seemed that all these other pics of couples (except for one, which will be discussed lastly) showed the man cheerfully doing homemaking things (baking gingerbread cookies, cleaning the bathroom, etc.)

And there was that one pic of the couple in a beautiful forest with an exceptionally good looking man kneeling in front a woman, putting a slipper on her foot (like Cinderella!)

Any thoughts?

 

[puma183]

All I know is that 70% of Divorces are filed by women (US statistics). Also consider the fact that 90%+ of Marriages are demanded by women. Put the two together and Marriage equals the greatest form of hypocricy there is.

(at least the modern day post-no-fault variant).

 

[Mr. Me]

More than thoughts. Actually, it's first hand knowledge because I'm in the wedding industry. The industry caters 99.999% to women. That's it in a nutshell. It's all about the fantasy. These brides have had an idea of what their wedding should be like since they were 5 years old. So vendors do the Hollywood fantasy Harlequin novel hopeless romantic Cinderella meets Prince Charming marketing. We're not marriage counselors.

Why do you think a woman puts on an expensive gown and such an event is produced out of it? If it was for the guy, it would be about a fishing trip or a night out at a strip club.

The bridal magazines are the creations of women. Read the credits and you'll see that those in charge are women. The articles are written by women. The readership is women. Any men involved are usually gay.

I can also tell you that there's a large number of grooms-to-be that come across to me as simply pawns in her scheme of mating and breeding and she's in charge, and then there's a VERY tiny small minority of guys who obviously have the woman wrapped around their finger and have been with her for years (it's plain for me to see which is which), and for whatever reason have decided to make it legal. In the first case, those guys have the placid mind set "let's do whatever she wants, it's her day" and the second group have the more aloof mind set "Whatever. It's her thing. WTF do I care, really?"

 

[STR8UP]

In the first case, those guys have the placid mind set "let's do whatever she wants, it's her day" and the second group have the more aloof mind set "Whatever. It's her thing. WTF do I care, really?"

"HER" day? WTF is THAT all about? When is it HIS day? Never.

You know, the more I see, the more turned off i get about this whole marriage thing. Maybe back in 1876. Today? FORGET IT.

Read an article the other day that said that the average cost of a wedding today is $28k. It also said the number is expected to climb to $33k in the next several years.

TWENTY EIGHT THOUSAND DOLLARS FOR ONE DAY TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY.

Do you think for a second that if the man had his say, that number would be $28K? More like $500 for the wedding (that's being generous) and $500 for the trip to Costco for a keg of beer and some Crown, Grey Goose, etc. for the after party.

$28K is like more than half a year's average salary. I'll tell you what....if and when I DO decide to marry, it isn't going to be with a woman who decides it fit to spend half a year's earnings in one day with only some pictures to show for it.

 

[puma183]

There is a very opinionated essay written about this topic from the male point of view at dont-marry.com.

 

[MaddXMan]

I like - and so does my gf - the idea of a commitment ceremony. Simple, outdoors, only closest friends and family. KC Chiefs player Tony Gonzalez did this with his gf a couple years ago and got razzed in the local press pretty good, but it just makes sense.

 

[Jeffst1980]

Mr. Me made a lot of good points. I'll add that just because magazines sell the idea of such estrogen-fueled fantasies to women doesn't mean that women are off the hook for believing them to be reality.

A woman that believes herself to be entitled to an impossible fairy tale marriage has only herself to blame. An adult should be able to distinguish between a fantasy used to sell a product and reality. That would be akin to a man wondering why HB10's weren't flocking to him every time you cracked open a coors light.

I'm very much against blaming the media for the problems men face today. It seems like a bit of a cop out. Entertainment, whether it's "sex and the city" or some AFC-driven sitcom, is just that...entertainment. I can watch an unrealistic depiction of romance onscreen and enjoy it as entertainment. It doesn't change my beliefs when I leave the theater. The real problem, as I see it, is that too many men are living passive lives and tolerating crap behavior from women out of fear that they "can't do any better." These poor guys lack the confidence to go out and claim what is rightfully theirs, and by and large create their OWN problems.

I think the root of this problem is the lack of positive male role models in a child's life. Confidence, integrity, strength--this stuff should be taught to children early on, by their FAMILY. Most average guys have no idea of what's possible in their lives because no one's ever shown them.

You'll notice that the backlash against PUA culture is relatively minor. When PUA culture is labeled as "creepy," it's usually due to the genuinely creepy tactics of canned openers and lame gimmicks. However, females seem to actually APPLAUD the idea of teaching AFCs to become ladies men. This is because a planet of AFCs really doesn't benefit women at all.