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Want to be sexy to women: Don't smile at them

oc16

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This is ten years old, but interesting:

Want to catch a lady's eye? Don't smile, study says (nbcnews.com)

I think this theory hold some weight. There is an attractive girl at the gym who I caught checking me out a few times (at least it seemed). About two months ago I purposely looked at her (we were working out about 10 yards apart) and gave her a smile (or more of a smirk, no teeth).

The next two times I have seen the woman and passed by her she purposely avoids looking at me now. Logically, you would think making eye contact with a cute woman and smiling shows confidence, apparently not. :rofl:
 

Focal core

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The next two times I have seen the woman and passed by her she purposely avoids looking at me now. Logically, you would think making eye contact with a cute woman and smiling shows confidence, apparently not. :rofl:
Women are the sex holder/chooser, they are the one who should doing that to you. the effect of men doing this signaling that he's on feminine side of trait
 

oc16

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Women are the sex holder/chooser, they are the one who should doing that to you. the effect of men doing this signaling that he's on feminine side of trait
I guess. I thought it showed confidence, but for now on I'll just look at women with a blank stare.
 

Focal core

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yeah a women who choose you will put herself in your line of sight, smiling and staring or even approaches you. only then you may start vetting
 

EyeOnThePrize

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There's some value in this. Being non-reactive to locked eye contact, or even seeming to be slightly annoyed by it, are indicators that you just dgaf and are high value. Some women will want to smell out if you're faking it and try to find out just how few fuucks you give. The fewer fuucks given, the more turned on they are. It doesn't mean they'll pursue you, but they may make it much easier for you to initiate by hovering in your vicinity. Or they may just want to be acknowledged by you and feel your validation, it's kind of silly.

For the hot ones it's refreshing compared to all the goofy dudes simping for her and being fake, so you can't really blame them.
 

2Rocky

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My DOPE suggests just the opposite. A lot of pillow rtalk has been them telling me how they fell inlove with my smile. I think it's the dimples. Given my stature and intense look , I NEED to soften my features to look more open and approachable. A less intimidating man would not...
 

Scars

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A lot of guys who struggle with women already who read articles like that will just make themselves look creepy to the opposite sex if they take it too seriously lol.
Agreed.

I think there is way too many variables involved.

A strong attractive man not smiling can be seen as "seductive".
A nerdy over-weight guy not smiling can be seen as the next columbine shooter/creep.
A semi-attractive man not smiling can make him look like a d-bag and not seem approachable (missed opportunity).

I definitely would not look to NBC News for any sort of pick-up/dating advice.
 

Barrister

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Based off of my own personal experience, I would say I don't agree with this at all. I tried to use this "cool & aloof" approach in the past and I have found I don't get near the results than if I am charismatic, smile a lot, and am out-going. Have actually been told I look pissed off when I do -- which obviously is not sexy. People in general are attracted to the latter. Not saying there aren't some women out there who won't find the hardass approach attractive, but I think it pales in comparison to the amount of women who want a charismatic and dashing guy. I think taking this approach will back fire more often than not.
 

Mike32ct

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A lot of guys who struggle with women already who read articles like that will just make themselves look creepy to the opposite sex if they take it too seriously lol.
I hear ya. Being too serious or too smiley can be creepy if the guy doesn’t have sufficient looks to back up either.

Notwithstanding, I would probably still recommend that such guy err on the side of too serious. She’s not going to laugh at a subpar guy’s humor anyway. Might as well go a bit mysterious/IDGAF. At the very least, he won’t risk appearing tryhard.
 
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2Rocky

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Might as well go a bit mysterious/IDGAF. At the very least, he won’t risk appearing tryhard.
But you HAVE to be genuine. That's the hardest thing when a guy doesn't have options....until he has enough experience to LET her be attracted and don't go pushing the interaction.
 

Mike32ct

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But you HAVE to be genuine. That's the hardest thing when a guy doesn't have options....until he has enough experience to LET her be attracted and don't go pushing the interaction.
Agree completely.

But to the extent he must initially “fake it until he makes it,” he should try to pick something close to his natural personality. Introverts may want to try a serious approach. Extroverts might want a more outgoing friendly approach.
 

sangheilios

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I hear ya. Being too serious or too smiley can be creepy if the guy doesn’t have sufficient looks to back up either.

Notwithstanding, I would probably still recommend that such guy err on the side of too serious. She’s not going to laugh at a subpar guy’s humor anyway. Might as well go a bit mysterious/IDGAF. At the very least, he won’t risk appearing tryhard.
I really think the issue is that men that are reading stuff like this and looking to apply it are social awkward, particularly around women. Next thing you know they start putting on an act to be more mysterious or more gregarious or whatever and it just looks cringey and fake to other people.
 

derby1

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Could hold some truth.

Its similar to picking a chic up in your car for the date, if shes local. I used to think this showed strong leadership skills , WRONG it always got me jumping through hoops to get laid.

However my mate who was the least smooth person in the room, had a IDGAf attitude and would get women to invest by meeting him, he would be blowing their kitty out everytime on the first meet.

totally unbelievable how women figure stuff out.
 

darksprezzatura

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Hey man firstly I don't take dating advice from females, researchers or otherwise.

Secondly, when I'm out i like to feel relaxed with mischief in my eyes. Probably a slight smirk in general. Idgaf what this article tells me to do to get laid. I'm out to have a blast.
 

BeExcellent

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[QUOTE="darksprezzatura, post: when I'm out i like to feel relaxed with mischief in my eyes. Probably a slight smirk in general. Idgaf what this article tells me to do to get laid. I'm out to have a blast.
[/QUOTE]

This is a great attitude & a great way to exist within oneself nevermind around other people.

I do this too. It’s kind of a “cat that ate the canary” smugness combined with amused mastery about life.

Ya know…life is pretty interesting. People with an attitude like this are random to a greater extent than most people. More adventurous. More comfortable to engage. More fun. They are unpredictable and infectious is their mischief. Therefore they are magnets to other people who sense subconsciously that mischievous nature. You know those people who say…

“Gee. I dunno. Let’s poke that bear & see what happens…”

Life is an experiment for those people. And they are extremely captivating to others as a result.

But it must be genuine indeed…
 

darksprezzatura

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This is a great attitude & a great way to exist within oneself nevermind around other people.

I do this too. It’s kind of a “cat that ate the canary” smugness combined with amused mastery about life.

Ya know…life is pretty interesting. People with an attitude like this are random to a greater extent than most people. More adventurous. More comfortable to engage. More fun. They are unpredictable and infectious is their mischief. Therefore they are magnets to other people who sense subconsciously that mischievous nature. You know those people who say…

“Gee. I dunno. Let’s poke that bear & see what happens…”

Life is an experiment for those people. And they are extremely captivating to others as a result.

But it must be genuine indeed…
bet you used to, or still participate in adventure sports
 

BeExcellent

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bet you used to, or still participate in adventure sports
My guy is an adventure sport athlete. He looks like he just got off a surfboard at any given time, lol. I played soccer & still run & hike & golf & ski. If I could make a good living at it I’d probably coach soccer. I enjoyed that at the club level in my past. I would get into motorsports if I was independently wealthy. I like to go fast…but I like the illusion of control whilst going fast…

I also once was a club DJ. Still have turntables & a board & vinyl. Very creative mixing all sorts of things together. Lots of fun.

So yeah. It’s fun. My BF wants to get into kite surfing. That looks like a blast. :) So we are looking at spots to go do that….
 
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